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 Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 8:40 pm
I don't mean to not be myself. I guess I just made myself change for the sake of feelings that others may have. Sorry...
*keira completly looks broken down and on the verge of crying. She didn't know how to talk about these kinds of things*
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 8:46 pm
*Hikaru looked at Keira as she spoke, he felt confused. He saw that her words were saying more than it seemed, and he was convinced of this when he saw her face. He held her hand tightly and spoke sincerely.*
Keira, I think I know what you are getting at...and I don't want you to hold back your feelings anymore...You look like you are hurting by keeping these things to yourself.
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:03 pm
*Keira sighs as Hikaru clenches her hand tighter. She looks down at the sea water and looks at her reflection.*
I don't want to have to make you feel bad just because I am alright? I hate putting my problems on other people. Just like you....I need to think it out and just deal with it.
*Keira sighs again and then looks up at Hikaru.*
If you must know...I like you. Well, you already new that. We kinda talked about it that one night. Like I said, I don't care about lables and s**t like that, I just kinda need to know what we are. Just friends? Friend's with benefits? I don't know. I would just assume you are just having fun! So am I! But then when Clever comes into the picture, it all changes for me. I feel jelous of her in a way and I know she likes you. I know I was around first, but she seems to have a lot mor depth to her then me. Who wants a girl that can't hold a converstation?
*At this, keira's eyes start to water and tears begin to fall down her face. She looks away from hikaru a moment then to the water to continue what she was saying*
I know she slept in your bed that one night I had that dream. Now it's really none of my business in the first place and you are not tired down to me or anyone. For some reason though, it hurt a bit to find the door locked knowing she was in there. I know you'f never lock the door, so she must have for some reason. I mean, does she know that I come in there at times? Gah I don't know. It's all just very confusing to me...I really don't know what to say...
*Keira sighs with tears stil steaming down her face. Every now and then, a tear would hit the water and ripple outward*
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:12 pm
(( Holy Crap! Its Sen! How have you been? I really hate that I always choose the night you are in to be unavailable. You mentioned your crazy sched. Why don't you PM Me about it? With all of the people RP'ing now I would really like to include you too! Of course...it wouldn't be Aykon you'd be RP'ing with but posting as Ben at the moment is kind of awkward. *LOL* I do hope I see you again!))
((H^1, you are impressing me more and more each day with your descriptions! You are really getting good at that! That tear on the water was a great visual! Keep it up!
I gotta sleep...dog just came back from becoming less of a man so we have to watch him close for the next little bit. Night all! ))
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:13 pm
*Hikaru watches as Keira looks down, he is carefully listening to her words to make sure he catches their true meaning. He was a little hurt as he listened to her words, but quickly realized he needed to be helping her, and not worrying about how he felt. He stroked her hand softly as she started to cry. He hated seeing her cry, and he hated even more that he was the source. When she finished speaking he moved forward and held her in his arms gently, in a supportive way. His voice was soft.*
Oh Keira, I'm so sorry. I wish I would have realized sooner...I like you, I do...but I can't lie to you and say that I'm not developing similar feelings for Clever. I wish I was stronger, and capable of just saying who I want to be with...but I don't know. Because of my uncertainty I have tried to pull away from you a bit...to lessen the possible hurt if I can't decide...
*He could have added more, but he didn't feel it would help any. He held her close still, not letting go unless she forced him to.*
I just don't know...if you want me to leave you alone, I'll just be your friend. Whatever you want me to do, just tell me what is easier for you, ok?
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:27 pm
*Keira continued to cry as Hikaru held her. She felt a whole lot better, but it was hard for her to handle what he was saying to her*
I figured you had the same type of feelings for her as you did for me. Yeah, it hurts a bit, but that's how the dating world is heh. You just got to choose who's better for you if you want a companion. I know that no matter who it is that you pick, I will always be your friend. I will support you and her if you choose her. I will not boast and talk down to her if you choose me. I am just not that type of person.
*Keira felt Hikaru's grp get tighter. She sighed a bit and wrapped her hands around his. She closed her eyes as he talked. She thought about what she really wanted to do and opened her eyes. She stared straight into the moon and spoke softly*
I don't want you to leave me alone Hikaru. I don't want you to feel obligated to hide Clever and yourself either. If you feel like kissing her or whatever and I'm around, just do it. You never know...I might join...
*Keira chuckled silently, but Hikaru would still be able to feel her body move as she did so*
No but in all seriousness, do whatever you want. I am still up for any thing you want from me. I am game for just friends or even something more. All I ask is that don't hurt Clever ok? I just told you that I can take you doing the same things with her as you do with me, but I am not so sure she would feel the same. Just go with your heart Hikaru, you can never go wrong with that!
((Thankyou Dave! ^_^ *Squee!*))
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:27 pm
~Sen arches a brow a quickly turns his head to look at the large empty common area. He could have sworn he heard a familiar voice from long ago. He smiles and shakes his head gently as he picks up a glass and begins to clean it with a white cloth.~
. o 0 (I wonder...)
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:36 pm
*Hikaru had told Keira the truth, this was all he could do. He held her as she cried, feeling like a jerk. However, he also felt a bit relieved, he was glad that he told her the truth and that she was telling him the truth as well. He knew that the next step would be to talk to Clever, but maybe not until after a bit of thinking on the subject. Keira was right, she might not take it as well as Keira was. Not that this was taking it all that well. He appreciated Keira's words, they made his life so much easier. He pulled her into his lap and kissed her forehead gently. He looked into her eyes with sincerity.*
Thank you, for being so much stronger than I thought. You amaze me Keira, you really do. Heh, I don't know if Clever would be thrilled if you joined, but I wouldn't stop you...But really Keira, don't even think that I don't like you, because I do. You are an amazing girl, and I am lucky to have you close to me in my life. I need to think about things more before I'll know much, but I'll figure it out, and put your heart at ease, along with mine.
*He smiled, he had always liked Keira, but tonight he was seeing a soft side of her that he admired.*
You are so sweet, heh, thinking of Clever at a time like this. Take care of yourself too, ok? I promise, I won't string you along. If I can't decide, I'll quit both of you and leave you to find someone who can love you completely.
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:43 pm
*As keira was put on Hikaru's lap, she smiled weakly. When he kissed her forehead, her tears stopped*
Thankyou. I mean, there is a lot more to me then just sex heh. I will be patient with you and whatever happens, happens!
*Keira adjusted in hikarus lap until she got comfortable. She laughed to herself thinking about how bad this was and she smiled*
I will take care of myself, don't worry. Oh and I can't really say I am looking for someone to love me completly Hikaru. I am not ready for that. If I got serious with anyone, it would take me a long time to get to that point. So, if you had to let us both go, I'd just go back to normal and wait for some other guy that may peek my interest.
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:46 pm
((ohh everyone all talking about me while I am gone. Such a meanie X button. I am going to come on in a little bit just giving everyone a heads up. And rp will be better tonight since I feel much better than the last two days. Woot))
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:48 pm
*Hikaru laughed softly and playfully touched your nose.*
Of course I know that silly, there is a lot more to you than sex.
*He smiled and closed his eyes as you moved around in his lap. He felt a slightly tingle, but forced himself to ignore it. He listened to what she said about love and wondered. He wasn't really looking for someone who merely peeked his interest, he wanted to love, and this time he wanted to be loved in return.*
Hm, well, if that is what you are looking for...
((Yay! *waves*))
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:53 pm
*Keira shrugs*
I never said that that is all I am looking for Hikaru. I want to find love too, but I am not looking for it. I feel if I look for it, I will just become upset and dissapointed and hurt you know? If it happens, then it happens. I am not going to stop it.
((I am not saying mean things GBF!!! They were really nice things! >.> How rude!))
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:54 pm
~Sen hums a simple melody as he tidies up the bar area. He takes a moist cloth and wipes down the surface of the counter, stopping occasionally to put some elbow grease on some stubborn spots on the surface.~
((Hello biggrin ))
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:57 pm
((Aww awesome! Sen *glomps*. Everyone is coming back *waves.* Yeah Ill be in in about an hour. I have somethings to get done.))
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:58 pm
*Hikaru smiled at Keira's logic. This made more sense to him. He nodded and kissed her lips softly. It was a small kiss. He didn't want to do too much but her felt a kiss would be alright.*
Well that is good. Thanks Keira. Sorry for throwing you in the water, heh.
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