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 Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2007 9:12 am
MadameStoner in the beginning i was uncomfortable with the thought of being completely naked, seriously. i refused to remove my cami, just so i could hide my stomach and, mainly, my boobs (as most everyone knows i have issues with those things). my boyfriend would always plead for me to take it off. he usually didnt win though, lmao
eventually i did it; i just learned to ignore it (its the same technique i used to get over my horrible work uniform!) and once i began ignoring it, sex became very enjoyable again, and Miles was happier too.
i still refuse to take a cami off with other people though. that boyfriend is the only person who's seen me fully naked...
i'm tired, so i apologize if this post seems a bit confusing >.< I understood it. I've been up all night though, lol, so don't feel bad. *goes to bed at 10 in the morning*
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Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2007 9:51 am
I used to be scared about taking my clothes off, and scaring away whoever I was close with, but not because of my weight. That bothered me, but the guys who were interested in me HAD to be interested in big girls. I was afraid my burn scars on my legs would freak them out, and I'd never find anyone. But, I lucked out, since I met my honey. He loves me for me, and not what I look like. I was 22 when we met, so I know it seems like it will never happen, but it will. You just have to let it happen, instead of going 'omg, I'm too scared'. It took a year for me to be comfortable enough to ask my boyfriend out. xd
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Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2007 11:07 am
MadameStoner in the beginning i was uncomfortable with the thought of being completely naked, seriously. i refused to remove my cami, just so i could hide my stomach and, mainly, my boobs (as most everyone knows i have issues with those things). my boyfriend would always plead for me to take it off. he usually didnt win though, lmao
eventually i did it; i just learned to ignore it (its the same technique i used to get over my horrible work uniform!) and once i began ignoring it, sex became very enjoyable again, and Miles was happier too.
i still refuse to take a cami off with other people though. that boyfriend is the only person who's seen me fully naked...
i'm tired, so i apologize if this post seems a bit confusing >.<
Sadly, I got comfortable taking my clothes off in front of other people by playing a game with a group of friends where we all ended up naked (haha, you know you have good friends when you can sit around drinking and being naked... or just let each other see you naked in general). They all complimented my boobies and so that helped out. Then my friend's boyfriend challanged me to go around topless the next time we went over to the same friend's house... I showed him... Mwa ha.I am not a whore, I swear ._. And I agree with Kitz_sune, I found my boyfriend at 18 and he was only my second one... my first one was also at 18 sweatdrop But part of it was my "I don't need anybody else attitude", guys were intimidated by me... not like I cared sweatdrop
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Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2007 2:32 pm
The Dread Pirate Ghosty MadameStoner in the beginning i was uncomfortable with the thought of being completely naked, seriously. i refused to remove my cami, just so i could hide my stomach and, mainly, my boobs (as most everyone knows i have issues with those things). my boyfriend would always plead for me to take it off. he usually didnt win though, lmao
eventually i did it; i just learned to ignore it (its the same technique i used to get over my horrible work uniform!) and once i began ignoring it, sex became very enjoyable again, and Miles was happier too.
i still refuse to take a cami off with other people though. that boyfriend is the only person who's seen me fully naked...
i'm tired, so i apologize if this post seems a bit confusing >.<
Sadly, I got comfortable taking my clothes off in front of other people by playing a game with a group of friends where we all ended up naked (haha, you know you have good friends when you can sit around drinking and being naked... or just let each other see you naked in general). They all complimented my boobies and so that helped out. Then my friend's boyfriend challanged me to go around topless the next time we went over to the same friend's house... I showed him... Mwa ha.I am not a whore, I swear ._. And I agree with Kitz_sune, I found my boyfriend at 18 and he was only my second one... my first one was also at 18 sweatdrop But part of it was my "I don't need anybody else attitude", guys were intimidated by me... not like I cared sweatdrop lol, well if thats what it takes to know you have good friends, then I have one real good friend around here, lol
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Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2007 3:45 pm
Original Poster: It sounds to me that your insecurities about being fat are ruining sex more than your actual size. There's always something to feel uncomfortable about, whether it's your stomach, your freckles, leg hair, a little growth, or whatnot. One woman was filled with anxiety and mortification over her puffy ankles, as if she was afraid people on the street were looking at her and gasping "Oh my god, look at that woman with the puffy ankles!"
Changing your weight would probably not fix this. Swapping bodies with Natalie Portman would probably not make you feel better. This change must come from within.
You have to realize, if a guy is having sex with you, he probably isn't repulsed or put off by any detail of your body, no matter how obvious and horrific it may seem to you.
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Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2007 8:52 pm
Fuzzy Necromancer Original Poster: It sounds to me that your insecurities about being fat are ruining sex more than your actual size. There's always something to feel uncomfortable about, whether it's your stomach, your freckles, leg hair, a little growth, or whatnot. One woman was filled with anxiety and mortification over her puffy ankles, as if she was afraid people on the street were looking at her and gasping "Oh my god, look at that woman with the puffy ankles!" Changing your weight would probably not fix this. Swapping bodies with Natalie Portman would probably not make you feel better. This change must come from within. You have to realize, if a guy is having sex with you, he probably isn't repulsed or put off by any detail of your body, no matter how obvious and horrific it may seem to you.
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Posted: Mon Apr 16, 2007 8:33 am
I'm still working on the enjoying-sex thing, due to certain events that happened in my past, but some of that does come from body image stuff. I'm very proud of my body and I know my girlfriend loves all my curves and all that, but because society is all "OMG be thin, fat is EVIL!!!!!", its still hard sometimes. Luckily we're both BBW so when one of us gets down because of that, the other understands and it works out okay. But I do agree with Fuzzy - the change has to come from within, and I am happier with my body and sex now that I'm proud of my size.
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Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2007 11:33 am
Being fat shouldn't make you feel like you do when you have sex. I felt the same way when I started to have sex because my boyfriend is skinnier than me. But don't worry about it. If he loves you its all good.
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Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2007 5:34 pm
I was always on top. My ex and I both prefered it that way, actually. Even if I were thinner I think I'd prefer top, I like the control.
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Posted: Wed Apr 18, 2007 4:04 pm
Fuzzy Necromancer Original Poster: It sounds to me that your insecurities about being fat are ruining sex more than your actual size. There's always something to feel uncomfortable about, whether it's your stomach, your freckles, leg hair, a little growth, or whatnot. One woman was filled with anxiety and mortification over her puffy ankles, as if she was afraid people on the street were looking at her and gasping "Oh my god, look at that woman with the puffy ankles!" Changing your weight would probably not fix this. Swapping bodies with Natalie Portman would probably not make you feel better. This change must come from within. You have to realize, if a guy is having sex with you, he probably isn't repulsed or put off by any detail of your body, no matter how obvious and horrific it may seem to you. i gotta agree, and comment that this is an excellent, well-worded post. i've been with girls at both ends of the spectrum (from stick-thin to bigger than me), and i've never had a problem with being visually repulsed by a girl's body. (except maybe for visible knobby ribcage.) if anything, a girl being comfortable in her own skin is a turn-on.
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Posted: Wed Apr 18, 2007 11:37 pm
I have to say every so often I'm hit with my own insecurities when it comes to even just being naked. I'm not super comfortable being naked around people I don't know all that well though was living in a house recently with my new boyfriend, a married couple which consisted of a corrections officer and a stripper, and a 50 year old guy who resembles santa claus. I think everyone ran around naked in that house except me and my boyfriend. I was just never that comfortable.
Back on subject. Yes, there may be some limitations on crazy positions as far as sexually but it doesn't mean there is dimished enjoyment. My boyfriend is not going to be able to pick me up and hold me up against a wall anytime in the near future. However, it doesn't mean we don't do things a little unconventionally sometimes. It isn't stuck to straight up missionary.
Really when it comes down to it you just have to say either they'll like ya naked or they won't. If they don't too bad for them. However, chances are if they've started urging you down that path it's a pretty good indication that they're wanting to hop between the sheets and see alot more of ya. Unless you've got some magic suit, they already know your basic size and shape and that didn't stop them from taking it as far as they have.
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Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 2:15 pm
♠I'm really skinny and fit. I'm even working on my abs to have a 6 pack. So needless to say, the girls I choose to become sexual with are very hesitant with everything I ask. I love all the weight on top of me, and I love seeing every curve of my lady, and it really bothers them. Ha, I even use to kiss and suck on my old girlfriends belly chub. whee ♠
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Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 8:34 pm
Well, when I was younger I had some hesitations about my body when it came to sex, but I think every girl, fat or thin, has to go through it. It's scary, y'know? Showing your naked body to someone for the first time...it makes you feel vulnerable. We know the most about our own bodies, especially all of its imperfections. But that's what makes us beautiful really...
I got over the insecurities really quick...once I realized that everyone has something they don't like about themselves.
And as for sex...let's just say I'm a cross between a nympho and a pervert. xd It doesn't have anything to do with my weight, it's just something I love. Sex feels really good, and I'm not going to let something like a stretch mark or a roll come in the way of that. *grin*
All of the men I've dated never really had a problem with it. My last boyfriend wanted me to be on top, and after a few stray thoughts, I knew that it was stupid to worry. Most men are pretty strong(though I can't speak for everyone), and I'm not throwing my entire weight on him anyway...so why not? mrgreen
Bottom line, Don't worry about it, luv. If the person loves you for you, being fat doesn't matter at all. <333
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Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 9:30 pm
Ok, ok, I've got the solution...
We're just gonna have to have ourselves a naked party 3nodding
...But where? *contemplates*
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Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 10:15 pm
LaRoseNoir Bottom line, Don't worry about it, luv. If the person loves you for you, being fat doesn't matter at all. <333 very true. my first and second girlfriends were a little skinny and bigger respectively. i never noticed a difference between the two during sex (despite the obvious difference in breast size) i actually never had a problem with myself being naked during sex. my only problem is im hispanic.....and hispanic men have a tendancy to be ......hairy..... emo thankfully im not king kong but it having more hair than most people normally expect bothers me (oddly enough i think it might be a mental thing because both girlfriends never noticed it.... emo ) im with rose in the fact that im part nympo with a dash of healthy male perv lol. sex is probably one the best things to enjoy in life other than movie night cuddles and other things. my last ex had a problem with her weight and physical appearance because she was a bigger girl but like was stated, if you are into someone enough, the physical things you dwell on dont even bother them.
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