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 Posted: Tue Aug 09, 2005 4:34 am
Good advice! I'd also say, have more condoms (if you use them) than you think you'll need. You never know when you might need more!
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Posted: Thu Aug 11, 2005 6:13 pm
How painfull is it for the first time? I'm not involved with anyone right now but I would like to know for future.
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Posted: Fri Aug 12, 2005 11:07 am
Psycho__Kitty How painfull is it for the first time? I'm not involved with anyone right now but I would like to know for future. If you read the first post, I'm pretty sure that that question gets answered. It says (or it should say) that it varies for each person. Some people have very painful sex the first time, because they're too nervous or not lubricated enough, etc, while other people have no pain at all. Some girls bleed, some don't. It's basically just different for everyone.
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Posted: Fri Aug 12, 2005 7:18 pm
Nikolita Psycho__Kitty How painfull is it for the first time? I'm not involved with anyone right now but I would like to know for future. If you read the first post, I'm pretty sure that that question gets answered. It says (or it should say) that it varies for each person. Some people have very painful sex the first time, because they're too nervous or not lubricated enough, etc, while other people have no pain at all. Some girls bleed, some don't. It's basically just different for everyone. I have heard of a guy ripping his p***s skin! ;-;
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Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 9:04 pm
Since it's the first time thread, I guess this is pertinent.
I had about... 1/3 of my first time this evening. We were hot, sweaty, totally turned on and ready to go. (Except that we were in my basement, on a slender leather couch, with my dad sleeping upstairs...) So, of course, we were both verrrryy nervous... but... got the condom on... and I've been on the pill about 3 weeks now, should be okay by now eh? So we're all set. Yeah! Yay sex! He lays me down and we try to get it to work... get through the first half an inch of my v****a, and then... there was no way in hell he was going to fit! I was incredibly sad... not to mention IT HURT SOOOOO BAD!!! He's rather wide, short but wide, in the penile region... and I'm rather slender in my vaginal space.
Anyway, so, first time jitters are well deserved! On a sidenote, does anyone have any advice for a better first time... the other 2/3? Aside from a better setting... because well, that would have been a crap place to lose my v-card. I love this boy, and amazingly he loves me even more, so its not a big deal, but i'd love to give myself to him as.... the greatest gift there is, basically. So, aside from waiting until the conditions are perfect, any ideas?
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Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2005 9:21 am
Little-Nepenthe Since it's the first time thread, I guess this is pertinent. I had about... 1/3 of my first time this evening. We were hot, sweaty, totally turned on and ready to go. (Except that we were in my basement, on a slender leather couch, with my dad sleeping upstairs...) So, of course, we were both verrrryy nervous... but... got the condom on... and I've been on the pill about 3 weeks now, should be okay by now eh? So we're all set. Yeah! Yay sex! He lays me down and we try to get it to work... get through the first half an inch of my v****a, and then... there was no way in hell he was going to fit! I was incredibly sad... not to mention IT HURT SOOOOO BAD!!! He's rather wide, short but wide, in the penile region... and I'm rather slender in my vaginal space. Anyway, so, first time jitters are well deserved! On a sidenote, does anyone have any advice for a better first time... the other 2/3? Aside from a better setting... because well, that would have been a crap place to lose my v-card. I love this boy, and amazingly he loves me even more, so its not a big deal, but i'd love to give myself to him as.... the greatest gift there is, basically. So, aside from waiting until the conditions are perfect, any ideas? Wait until you've finished one full Pill prescription, before having sex. It takes at least one full month for the medication to reach it's full effectiveness, and you don't want to take unecessary risks, right? And if it hurt, chances are you were too nervous (as you said in your post), which will make you tense up and be less lubricated. Both of which will cause you to have painful sex. You could try using saliva in the future, buying lubrication (Astroglide, KY Liquid, etc), or just waiting for a better situation that would make you less nervous (like waiting until no one was home, etc).
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Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 3:36 pm
Can you help me. redface Please bare with me, this is hard to explain and im nevrous about it. I was about to have sex with the most important person in my life and even though being a virgn is very important to me, i want to share this moment with him but i back out when the pain started. He went easy on me and i decide to stop and stay a virgn till marriage. When i got home i seen a light spot or 2 of blood. It would be like you cut your finger or piked it. I thought he might of pop my cherry and i wasnt a virgn no more. I think he just scentch it. Next day I was checking myself and muching down there hard to see if everything is okay cuz i thought it may be the time of month or what we did somthing was wrong.Then i started to bleed more. I think i pop it. I dont know if did I or did i not? Im confused. I dont know much about sex and i dont know if im still a virgn. Im 20 and im pretty small of a person and i was uptight while this was happean. BTW he didnt go in me so.. ahh i need some more help. crying Just worried!
Im a still a virgn? Did he pop my cherry? Thank you so much for your time!!! love you guys!
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Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 4:04 pm
In my opinion having or not having a hymen doesn't make or not make you a virgin. If that made sense... sweatdrop Even if your hymen is broken you can still be a virgin. Ie. I'm fairly sure I broke mine with a tampon. That didn't mean I wasn't a virgin. The only thing that makes you not a virgin is having sex. Now you will have to decide in your own mind with your own values whether or not you have had sex. It's usually defined by penetration but if it was only partial penetration then it's really up to your values to decide. If you experience very heavy bleeding or if it doesn't stop after a couple of days then go see your doctor about it and get checked out.
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Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 10:07 pm
Exactly. It depends on what your definition of a virgin is. Some people say it's when you break your hymen during sex, others say it's when you do something sexual for the first time. I like the term "technical virgin", in which you're not a virgin anymore because you've done something sexual, but you haven't had intercourse yet so you're "technically a virgin."
Keep an eye on the bleeding. If he penetrated you with anything, fingers, p***s, etc, it might be from that. In which case it could be explained that you were too tight because you were nervous, or he was too big, etc. Either way, if the bleeding doesn't stop within the next few days, or if it gets really heavy, go see a doctor as soon as possible.
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Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 3:47 am
Nikolita Keep an eye on the bleeding. If he penetrated you with anything, fingers, p***s, etc, it might be from that. In which case it could be explained that you were too tight because you were nervous, or he was too big, etc. Either way, if the bleeding doesn't stop within the next few days, or if it gets really heavy, go see a doctor as soon as possible. The bleeding stop in a sec or 2. I know i keep asking but bleeding does mean as my heymen being pop? Just im worried.
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Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 6:30 am
Chaotic_AngelBC Nikolita Keep an eye on the bleeding. If he penetrated you with anything, fingers, p***s, etc, it might be from that. In which case it could be explained that you were too tight because you were nervous, or he was too big, etc. Either way, if the bleeding doesn't stop within the next few days, or if it gets really heavy, go see a doctor as soon as possible. The bleeding stop in a sec or 2. I know i keep asking but bleeding does mean as my heymen being pop? Just im worried. Why are you worried about your hymen breaking? If it broke, then it broke. Yes the bleeding can be from your hymen breaking, it could be he scratched you internally (like if he fingered you), it could be you were too tight and the friction internerally made you bleed a little, etc.
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Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 3:39 am
Lepid0ptera If you want to enjoy the first time you have sex, (from the female side), just make sure you're not physically a virgin beforehand. That means exploring your v****a with your fingers, or better yet, a d***o : ) If you're too embarassed to explore yourself, why are you having sex?. i sort of did that... but when i was 15... redface i always thought it ment i wasn't a virgin, and it made me "stretched" and big.... BrokenWing Good advice! I'd also say, have more condoms (if you use them) than you think you'll need. You never know when you might need more! Quote: I agreee....! lol, like i make it my bf job to haqve the condoms i have the implaon its my part..... .... but i need a little advice, I slept over my bf house this past weekend.... we didn't have any protection... we were going for 6 hrs straight.. we gave each other oral.. and handjobs and stuff.... he went into me for like 2 seconds and siad "shouldn't do that for too long" but it was getting late and we kinda needed to go to sleep so i tried and he tried to get him into me.... but he was just too big.... and it wasn't working can u suggest an idea to make it better or something.....
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Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 6:43 am
First off, use birth control, or a condom at least. 2 seconds is 2 seconds too long, as there is still pre-c** that can enter your body, and pre-c** has sperm in it. If you can't afford to have a baby/get an abortion, use proper birth control. It is the mature and responsible thing to do.
If you were about to go to sleeep, maybe that's why he didn't fit. I mean maybe you weren't in the mood, maybe you were too tired, maybe you were nervous/anxious, etc, any of which will make you not as responsive towards sex. I'd say wait until you have a better mood, like in the middle of the day when you wouldn't be tired, or wait until you've had a break from each other for a bit.
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Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 5:52 pm
My friend and I were talking and she had a very interesting imput on first time sex compiled from stories for other friends and advice for first timers. I found it interesting when she told me, so I thought I'd add it here.
Firstly, make sure you're ready. As Nikolita mentioned, if you haven't talked to your bf/gf, then you're not ready to be intimate. Know what they like and what they want. BUT there are times when you're nervous and unsure of what you're doing. That doesn't necessarily mean you aren't ready. Nerves can be expected and it doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing. When your experiencing your first time of anything you'll be nervous. Sometimes it takes a little humor to break the mood. Know your partner and remember...this is a sharing experience. You want to make it good for both partners.
Secondly, make plans. The worst first times are normally spontaneous, because you aren't in a good place at the right time. If you're sure you're ready, make sure you have everything in order. Birth control and a place. You want to make the experience romantic. And guys, even if it's your first time, make it more special for the girl. I think in today's society it really is a bigger deal for a girl to "give it up", so make sure this is her special time. Doesn't mean you aren't sharing the experience, but a little romance goes a long way.
Thirdly, women, don't expect too much if it's the guy's first time. A friend of ours said that her first time barely lasted thirty seconds. Because everyone involved was so nervous. And don't be surprised if things aren't like they planned. Things do go wrong and you have to roll with the punches.
One of our friends said her bf was an excellent lover, but when it came to sex, he was too nervous to "enter her all the way". Just know that as time progresses, you both will grow and learn about eachother.
Remember, this is a special experience. Make sure it's with the right person, because once it's done, you can't go back and do it again.
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Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 10:08 pm
Sorry, thank you for correcting me. You're right wilderness, nerves doesn't always mean you're not ready for sex - I just meant that out of the people I've talked to who didn't have a painful first time, I remember almost all of them saying they weren't that nervous, and therefore it wasn't too painful for them. They understood what would happen, they knew more or less what to expect, and so they were less nervous.
That's all I meant, sorry. whee
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