|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Wed Aug 07, 2024 4:29 pm
Julian chewed on the inside of his cheek as he listened, and then he finally just crossed his arms over his book and laid his head down over them. It took him a few seconds to pick himself up again, but he mused, “It is uncomfortable. But I don’t think I’m explaining myself very well. I’m sorry.”
Some people were just better at figuring things out faster, or making friends faster, or learning new things or saying the right things or–well, they just had a better grasp of their learning curve. Julian’s was probably all over the place. He wasn’t good at anything, or fast, or proficient.
But that hadn’t been what he was trying to say, nor was it where he wanted to direct the conversation.
Julian had been used to sharing a room when he met Luke, so he already had a bit of an understanding of what it was like. The experience of living with Luke had been different in a lot of ways, though. Not bad! He was friendlier, and more enthusiastic, and more eager to build a friendship.
Luke had said things that Julian couldn’t imagine saying–especially not about his friends. They were good people. Luke hadn’t been trying to say anything hurtful, Julian understood that, but he didn’t want Luke thinking poorly of his friends. For as much of an issue as his own thoughts and emotions were, he would probably always prioritize the people around him over himself, so he was quick to insist, “I think all of my friends are good people. I’m sorry you felt off-footed. I hope you were more comfortable after you got to talk a bit. I wish I’d been more on top of things that night, I would have liked to introduce you all for real.”
He didn’t want Luke to be uncomfortable, but he thought highly of Luke and his other friends, so it made sense that they would all get along and be friends, too. “I don’t think I could ever call any of my friends selfish. Or mean, or impatient. I shouldn’t have said anything, I didn’t mean to make you think that. I probably just got confused or misunderstood, anyway. I know everyone just wants what they think is best for me.”
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 07, 2024 7:51 pm
“Hey! There’s no need for any apologies, I get it, I promise I get it.” Luke gave a smile and honestly, wanted to reach out and stroke Julian’s hair, but restrained himself and shook his head. “I was so worried about you, of course I was going to be off footed. And your boyfriend is really protective of you so like, that was a little hard…I just wanted them to like me…”
His words trailed off a little and he shrugged. “I liked Maisie, she was really nice! And I really, really liked how much they all cared about you. That made me really happy. I like knowing you have people who love and care for you.”
As to him defending whoever…he had been talking about, Luke shook his head. “I get it…and people all express themselves differently…I just…I personally don’t think you should have to change yourself, but…I do agree that…at least I want the best for you, and sometimes you do seem to think of yourself last…and so I just try my best to put you first wherever and whenever I can. I know that you’re important, and you’re amazing and wonderful, and I hope one day you’ll be able to see yourself as I do, and as the rest of your friends seem to.”
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 07, 2024 8:41 pm
Julian looked up from his book with slightly furrowed brows and a confused expression. A part of him looked alarmed, like he’d seen a ghost, but he managed to get a hold of himself quickly. He leaned forward and whispered “What?” but then cleared his throat. “I’m not dating anyone, Luke. I’m not sure–I don’t know who you’re talking about, I’m sorry.”
Why would Luke have thought–it wasn’t like they talked about who they were dating, or crushes, or anything like that, but where did he get that idea? Had someone been teasing Luke while he wasn’t around, or–
No, that didn’t sound like his friends. They wouldn’t tease about that.
Julian shifted again. It felt like little bugs were crawling over him so he stopped to brush at his arms just in case. There wasn’t anything on his uniform, or on the table, or even on the ground around them. He still seemed a bit frazzled.
“Sorry, I don’t know if I heard the rest of that. I–Maisie? She’s really nice. They all are. And they’re all really good people, and they care a lot. And they try to do the right thing. And they work really well together. I’m really glad they let me stick along with them. And you, too. I’m glad you still wanted to stay friends.”
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Aug 08, 2024 7:44 pm
Luke blinked and felt heat creeping up his neck and into his face as Julian…denied that…
“Oh…I…I had assumed…the uh…Reims? I’m pretty sure that was his name–he was–is super protective over you and he was…it seemed like he was unhappy we were roommates…and I just…I had assumed. I’m so sorry!”
He felt like a fool, suddenly, and hid his face in his hands, trying to hide the embarrassed blush on his face…but also to hide the immense relief that he was feeling. That…
Luke forced the thoughts away and then finally lowered his own hands. “I hope I get to spend more time with them and get to be their friend too…they seem like good people…I would…really like to introduce you to my brother and cousin sometime as well, just so you can have more…more…uh…unicorn friends? Just in case you ever need help or something…? Plus, I just…want you to meet them and for us to all be friends too.”
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Aug 08, 2024 7:46 pm
Julian was visibly perplexed but there was no shame or irritation in his expression. Luke looked embarrassed, but it was just an accident. A misunderstanding. Julian would have to reflect later though; right now his mind was swimming.
“He’s protective of all of his friends. He has a good heart. I was in over my head and he just got to me first, that’s all. He knows–I’m not the best at all of the…” he gestured vaguely, probably just to have something to do with his hands. “Stuff we do. I still have a lot to learn. He knows a lot of my weaknesses, he was just making sure I had a grip.” Julian hadn’t, of course. Reims had seen that. “If it had been anyone else having a worse time, he’d have gone to them. He’d probably even have done it for you if you needed it. But that’s–it’s part of why I’m really happy they’re my friends, too.”
He swallowed the lump in his throat and sat a little more upright, because this was important.
“I hope you won’t judge any of them too harshly. Reims is just very serious when things are dangerous. I don’t think you being my roommate was a problem! He and I have talked about you. Oh–only good things,” Julian promised. He only ever wanted to say good things about his friends, after all. “But I’d like to meet your friends. Um, family.”
Even if Luke knew Julian was still a bit awkward and shy, he wanted to try. This whole war was so dangerous–the more friends they had, the more people they could trust to look after each other, the better off they’d all be.
Hopefully.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Aug 08, 2024 7:53 pm
“I don’t judge them at all!” Luke said quickly, wanting to make sure that Julian understood. “I just…hope that they’ll accept me one day, that’s all…” He had been worried about that, and hadn’t wanted to really admit it. Maisie, she seemed like she liked him. Or at least didn’t hate him, and the two Moon Knights were the same way, but…
Julian was right. It had been a very bad night, with a lot of bad feelings and bad thoughts…and maybe they could meet again when it wasn’t such high risks, such high emotions…
“I…want to be friends with him. With all of them, but Reims seemed like he was the one who…just…I don’t know. And I thought it was because he was jealous…and like, thought I was trying to snipe you…it…it made sense...but…”
He sighed. “Yvonne was really nice, I liked him…Or, at least he didn’t…I don’t know. Maybe I’ll send Reims a note or something and see if we can talk and figure things out. But! Yes! It would be amazing. You’re amazing and they’re going to be so excited that you’re…you know. Special. I’ve never told them, and I know they’ll…I know my brother will be surprised that I could keep a secret for so long! But…ah, Julian…I’m so glad that good things are starting to happen for you…”
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Aug 08, 2024 7:54 pm
While Julian couldn’t clearly remember pockets of that night, he did know that the group had a lot of enthusiastic, friendly people who always went out of their way to make people feel welcome. Ephesus was so sweet and friendly, and Amarynthos was so loud and friendly, and Rose was so supportive and friendly, and Cynthus was so enthusiastic and friendly, and Yvoire was so gentle and friendly–
Oh, he just thought all of his friends were friendly. Even Reims. Worry had etched into Julian’s features, and he felt instinctively anxious. He was protective of all of his friends, too. In his own way.
“Um, good things have been happening to me for a while. Sometimes it’s just not the things you’re hoping for. And maybe I’ve missed some of those things because I was too narrow minded. I was sort of fixed on one outcome and…well, this is a different outcome. It’s not the end of anything! But it’s a different path, for sure. It’s a lot to take in. But–I don’t think I know a Yvonne. Um–Yvoire? He was there that night. And, um. I’m sorry, we should have talked about that night a while ago. I’m sorry that you’ve had to worry about things. Reims is–he’s different. You won’t know him after just one meeting, and especially not one like that! But he’s a really good guy, Luke. He needs some time to open up, but he’s been good to me, and I really trust him. When we talked afterwards, I didn’t think he was jealous. And he isn’t trying to snipe me. I’ll have to ask if we can all hang out. He isn’t comfortable when he’s not powered up but maybe we could go to someone’s Wonder and clean up or something and you could get to know everyone more. You did really well with meeting everyone, I know big groups are very intimidating. Maybe we could try hanging out in smaller groups so you can get to know them how I have? Oh, but–I’m really glad that everyone got out of there okay. And I’m really looking forward to meeting your friends. I’ll do my best,” he said, talking so quickly that he was nearly tripping over his own tongue.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Aug 08, 2024 7:58 pm
“Yvoire! Oh shoot. I was kind of close! That name stuck with me, and honestly, I was too nervous to ask for him to repeat it! And, Julian.” Luke hesitated. Shaking his head. “You weren’t ready to talk about it, and I don’t want to push you. I’ve never wanted to push you into anything. I enjoy what we have.” He gave a little sigh and lay his head on his arms, looking up at Julian with a fond smile.
“I would love to hang out. I’d love to have him up on my Wonder too! We can…maybe he could join us for camping or something, I don’t know. I just. Want to show it off. I’m proud of it and it makes me happy. Do you think you’ll be able to spend the night at my place this weekend? I have mom’s consent letter here if you want to? She misses you, and wants you to meet the puppy. And if you want, you and I can do the first bit of camping? Just a night, or just a few hours?”
He gave a slight yawn, the warm breeze was so comfortable. And being with Julian was comfortable.
“Sometimes what we want isn’t what’s the best for us…I know, Jason and I had to learn that with moving….we…wanted to stay, but…now look at us. Destiny City…has brought more good things than I can name. I’m sorry that…you didn’t get the good things that you had been counting on, but I really, truly hope that the new good things…are just…going to be the best? If that makes any sense.”
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Aug 10, 2024 7:23 am
Luke looked tired. Julian couldn’t blame him; it was a nice day. He’d enjoyed the warmth of the sun and the gentle breeze when it had been just him, reading his book under the tree here.
“I can ask,” he promised. “I’m not sure if Talia had any plans, but I’ll ask her, too. I’m sure she’d be glad to know that we were hanging out.”
She cared about the Lysithea Knights and she asked about them often.
“I’ll get all my homework finished before this weekend. I want to have free time. We probably have a lot to catch up on. And I’m looking forward to meeting your puppy.”
He didn’t know how to answer Luke about some things but that wasn’t uncommon. A nervous knot in the pit of his stomach wound tightly. He didn’t want to say the wrong thing and he didn’t think that Luke could understand.
Sometimes what we want isn’t what’s best made sense, sure. But how was anyone qualified to judge what was best for someone when they didn’t know the story behind it? Oh, maybe that was his fault. But Julian didn’t want to talk about things, he wanted his friends to trust him and he wanted to be able to bring it up when he was ready.
He didn’t feel ready. He still felt bowled over by the reality of everything. By the weight, and pressure, of the world.
Luke was giving him good wishes, though. So Julian hoped for good things for his friends, and for himself.
Even if he didn’t know exactly what that might entail.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
