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“You were young…” She blinked slowly and in the seconds her eyes were closed Laven could see his boyish face reflected in the fathomless blue pools that were woman’s clear yet angry eyes.

“Just like him.” The little senshi she had run into shortly after awakening, back when she was moving her belongings into storage and bringing what she could back with her to the Dark Kindom. “A chibi, I think that’s what he was. He was hurting and wanted me dead because of someone else’s sins. Said that the Negaverse had killed his brother. His own life didn’t matter as long as he got revenge.”

“The story doesn’t end with Tanzenite transforming into a youma,” An officer she would have to inquire more about later. “You had a reason to live, someone to fight for, a will to survive.” He wouldn’t be here now if he didn’t. “I have to ask, what did you do with that anger?” If a child was willing to blindly take on a half-youma, what reckless things did he do in search of revenge?

Laven winced when his grip tightened but made no sound or movement to pull away until his hand loosened.

“I understand the need for revenge after what was done to you and your friends.” They were prisoners of war, but what the Blood Moon Court did to them was an inhumane war crime. Their actions, in a sense, coincide with something he had said to her once before about humans having the capacity to be much worse than monsters. “The fact you were able to rally many across factions means they must have seen you fit as a leader with a just cause.”

“But I think it could have been handled differently had the Sovereigns at the time thought to share with you details of the tentative alliance and not just expect you to blindly follow orders.” There were times when such things could be expected if it was perhaps confidential but because of his involvement and what was done to him, Wolframite should have been included in the negotiations.

“You said the Blood Moon Court were the ones that initiated the attack on the Negaverse. But you retaliated against the Dark Mirror Court. I can only assume that the shift in leadership and desire to forge an alliance was because they denounced the actions of the former leader and wanted to make amends or atone for what was done.”

“It doesn’t erase what happened though, it doesn’t make the scars vanish or nightmares go away. I stand by you and agree that the ones that followed Ares’ orders should have been held accountable for their sins but not their new leader or those who had no involvement.” The grey line was very thin but still there. An eye for an eye, or so the saying went, and with that in mind his actions were justified.

It was no different than her wish to see the person who had killed her brother, intentional or not, lose someone close to him just so he could feel her pain, to suffer the way her parents were suffering. But that didn’t mean the innocent person deserved to lose their life simply because they were hurting. “Time heals nothing, it just gives us the ability to learn to live with the pain.”

“I have to ask, if you knew then what you know now, would you have still done it? Or would you have taken a different approach?” She had to wonder if he was capable of learning from past mistakes so he could do things differently if something similar were to happen again.

“If I had been taken instead of you…” Laven became quiet.

Eyes glazed over she absently lowered her hand back down and without really thinking much on her actions began tracing the back of her finger along the edge of his ear. “I wouldn’t have survived” She knew herself well enough to be able to honestly admit that statement. “Not what you went through.”

Despite being a Lieutenant for almost a year now, she was no hardened soldier.

Aside from today, she had only ever encountered another senshi once while alone and it wasn’t even on an active patrol. Fortunately, it was just a kid but the fact of the matter is, her training was limited to just sparing with those familiar to her leaving her ill-prepared to deal with those of the opposite faction.

“I don’t respond well to pain. In fact, it was during a spar with Lopezite when I thought he was going to break my back with his sheathed that I learned I could shift into a water form. Surprised him as much as myself when it went through me and hit the ground.”

Aside from that moment, it had been months since she had been injured in her first bout with Wolframite and in the wake of it, she sat in her room crying which in the grand scheme of things was nothing when compared to the shark bite she received on her leg when she was younger. But it did serve as a testament to her former statement in that if a bite, even if it was accompanied by copious amounts of venom, could nearly make her want to give up and just hide in her room then it went without saying that *any* kind of torture could break her easily.

“Assuming I did somehow survive, there is the difference between what I would have done and what I would have wanted to do.” However, now that she was half-youma, Laven had to wonder where the line was drawn. When it came to self-preservation, the dragon part of her seemed to overtake her humanity and do things that she otherwise was unwilling or unable to do if she was just a simple human girl or a normal officer.

“I would have felt betrayed… abandoned by the Sovereigns decision and would have demanded an explanation as to why they agreed to the alliance.” Enemy of my enemy, as he had worded it, would not have been good enough because, in the end, alliance or not, they were still the enemy and a small group at that.

Laven fell silent beside him, her eyes shifting in a way that it looked like she was studying the pattern on her quilt but her gaze was set somewhere far beyond the blanket or bed. Her mind traveled to darker places where it had not been in some time but in light of what happened today, could anyone really blame her?

Drawing in a deep breath slowly she sighed, her attention shifting back over to Wolframite laying on the bed beside her. She wanted to smile reassuringly at him but in her current state it was difficult to force such an expression on her face. Instead she placed her webbed hand atop his head and lightly scratched the space between his ears with her sharp claws.

“I would have wanted the senshi that hurt me, and the ones that hurt my friends dead. If that was denied then I would expect Aries’ head at the very least for being the one that had lead them.” Cut the head off the snake, use her as an example as to what happens if any were to step out of line and break the alliance.

“If you really want to know what I would have wanted to do…” Laven paused for a second while she removed her ear cuff and held it in her hand. “You’re more than welcome to see the scenarios and how I imagine them. Just know, you’ll probably be left disappointed in me.”

“I remember,” Laven turned and pressed a kiss upon his brow then leaned her cheek against the top of his head.

The earring, for now, was set aside on the bed as she instead wrapped an arm around him comfortingly. “I promise I will do everything in my power to keep that from happening.” With her other free hand she touched the side of his face and beneath her fingertips she could feel the scars from where he had been burned.

“I don’t want to lose you either,” she admitted honestly. Her tone carried with it a sad note, because she understood that as she was, she may not have the power to make much of a difference in the end but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t try.

For a moment, Laven’s hand cupped the side of his face tenderly, her thumb brushing against his cheek as her mind began to wander. Silence hung in the air for a while longer before she moved to hook a finger beneath his chin in a wordless request to look up and meet her gaze.

“If anything ever happens to me,” between the two of them she was likely to fall into a trap or get caught before he would and although her ability to turn into water made her flighty and hard to hold on to, it wasn’t an impossible feat once her magic wore out.”I don’t ever want you to seek revenge on my behalf.”

“As long as I’m still alive I will need you by me, not off hunting or fighting someone. But if the worse case should ever happen, know I do not want you to seek revenge on my behalf. I don’t want grief or anger to consume you to the point that you lose sight of who you are.”

“You are precious to me to allow that to happen.” Wolframite had a special place in her heart and it would pain her knowing that she might lose him if history was unkind enough to ever repeat itself.

“When we first met you told me that if I cannot kill then you could. These claws, they’re more than just weapons. You can’t just hang them up or put them away where they remain hidden and unseen to the blood shed. They are a part of you, and every life you take, even if it is justified, will become heavier and heavier burden to hold on to.” Laven took his paw in her hand and brushed her lips across the back of his knuckle.

“Find someone or something worth fighting for. Protect those who can’t protect themselves; newly recruited Lieutenants who have no idea what they’re doing or have no business being a part of the Negaverse,” a small smirk tugged the corner of her lips knowing she landed squarely in that category.

“Or a cocky Captain that believe they can take on the world and end up neck deep in s**t.” Laven gave his paw a light squeeze. “Become a Sovereign like those you look up to and people will follow you willingly.”

“Perhaps try to mend what’s broken between you and Zinkenite, show him how much has changed and maybe he can help guide you.” She knew nothing about the General King aside from the limited information available in the database through the use of her tablet, mainly that he was head of the Intel division, one of the areas she was interested in pursuing. But she hoped that he could see how hard Wolframite has been working to do better, to be better than he was before.

For as much as she believed in him, and what he was capable of, all Laven wanted was for others to do the same. Everyone makes mistakes, but so very few are willing to learn from them which is what made him unique, a gem among riverstones that if polished properly could shine brightly above the rest.

It was a difficult topic to discuss but an important one nonetheless. At least they both seemed to share a similar desire and respected the wishes of the other in the event that something devistating were to happen to one of them.

Allowing herself to be pulled into his embrace, Laven closed her eyes and nodded her head. "I promise." She shifted in his lap then turned so she could rest her head against his shoulder more comfortably.

Time like this she wished that she were able to pull forth that purring sound that seemed to make him smile but her heart wasn't in it and so she hummed a song to which there were no words. A simple melody until one, or both, of them finally fell asleep.