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 Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2018 9:43 am
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Arias laughed again and shook his head. “I only do whip tricks, Nick. They can’t be that enthralled. My act makes a lot of noise, perhaps that’s what they find appealing. That, and breaking things. You are too focused during your own show to see the awe and adoration in your eyes when you handle your animals the way you do. When we have children, please don’t say ‘their dumb little faces,’ though.”
But, a smile had broken across his face, and the more the words sank in, the more his muscles relaxed. The more his emotions faded.
The more human he felt.
The smile on his face was tired, but real. “I am very happy to hear that you want a family. I was worried, for a long time. This means a lot to me. More than you know, probably.”
More than Arias knew how to express.
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Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2018 9:45 am
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“But they are dumb little faces, honey.” Nick gently tugged Arias down so they were both laying together and placed a kiss on his cheek. “It’s like they’re made of clay or something, their cheeks are all round, and their eyes are much too wide and cute and perfect…and sometimes they’re just cute okay.”
He wiggled for a moment, trying to grab the blanket, finally managing to get it and pull it up over the both of them, sighing in content.
“I’m…I’m happy too. More than you know, too, I think…I’m…I’m excited. I’ve…I don’t know, love. I’m not sure how to say what’s on my mind…but I want dumb little faces of our own…even if it means a lot of messes and crying and long nights…but…”
After a moment he sighed. “…would you be okay if it wasn’t a baby? The older kids get overlooked so often…I mean. You know that’s how I got involved with the circus. Too many foster homes and I finally just…left.”
His words faltered and Nick slowly reached up to rub his head. That was what happened, wasn’t it? Of course it was…but…
…But what?
“I don’t know, Arias…nothing but you seems real today…I think I’m losing my mind…”
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Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2018 9:45 am
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Another smile formed on Arias’ face and he nearly laughed again at ‘dumb little faces’. He made himself comfortable on Nick, nestling his cheek on to the blonde’s shoulder as he spoke. He had never had any discrimination on the age of a child, and he couldn’t help but feel his heart swell with pride at hearing Nick speak. “I would take any child that needed a home,” he mused. “All of them, if I had a wallet big enough.”
He lay against Nick, eyelids drooping. He was tired, but sleep seemed like such a dangerous concept right now.
“Nothing but you seems real, either,” he said after a moment. And, even then, some of what Nick was saying didn’t seem real. He didn’t know if this was an illusion or a hallucination or a dream, but this contact with Nick seemed real. These feelings seemed real.
This conversation seemed real.
“But we’ll figure this out,” he insisted, with a confidence and a strength he didn’t know if he’d had fifteen minutes ago.
“We’ll be okay. I’ll take care of you, and you’ll take care of me, and we’ll be okay.”
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