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 Posted: Mon Mar 25, 2019 3:13 am
Curse. She thinks of it as a curse. Kyou's brows knotted in frustration, even a little regret. He can't deny that he had initially thought of this as a curse for the Frei as well. He just... forgot over time perhaps. He never knew that this lack of ability would burden Anya so much.
And Anya has her own points. Kyou can't deny that all the fel essences possesses certain levels of threat, some more than others. Of course, if the powers were wielded wrongly, the consequences would have been very bad. He also can't deny, that it had happened before. Such as the time when Lazarus blew up the Lab, would be a great example.
Sometimes Kyou does question himself. Is his main concern really about safety with this project of his?
Kyou considered his answer carefully as he looked at his cup of tea. "I can't deny that fel essences are dangerous, and some of the powers that the Raevans wield are dangerous as well. Take Lazarus's fire abilities for example, he could create explosions and set things on fire." He recalled the moment when Lazarus grew from a Frei to a Sigel. "However, some powers might be too strong for young Raevans to handle. It was the case for Lazarus when he was a Frei." A time beyond Anya's birth. "He couldn't control his powers, frequently setting things on fire. And when he grew, he practically blew the Lab up."
"I've thought of sealing his powers when he was a Frei. But it was impossible. He was rebellious, he wouldn't listen. Even if he did, later on in my experiments I discovered that the only way to seal a Raevan's powers, was to do it when they are in development, when they are still growing in the tank." To seal away potential. It's something difficult to do even for him.
"Moreover." He continued, looking straight at Anya again. "The virus's powers only affect Raevans. It enhances their powers, but at the same time also make it almost impossible to control because the Raevans will often go into a berserk state." He frowned, remembering those dark times when he had to seal Lazarus in a room to contain the damages. "I didn't know how the power will develop in you. And that is why I decided to seal all the powers related to the virus in you. I... apologize that it is giving you so much grief all these times."
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Posted: Mon Mar 25, 2019 4:05 pm
He was quiet for a moment, contemplating. She fidgeted more in response, so nervous and borderline scared now. Anxiety felt like a glass ball knotted in her chest, but one that was vibrating at such a high speed it threatened to crack at any moment and pierce every organ, muscle, and bone that surrounded it.
There was almost something like relief when the Doctor finally spoke again, a balm, albeit a short-lived one.
She perked up when he spoke in agreement to her points. They were indeed right were they not? Everyone she knew and even those she hadn't met yet, all had a potential for danger that could perhaps border on her own untapped source. Maybe someone surpassed her but no one knew it yet.
When he mentioned 'young Raevans' some petulance came back to her features for an instant.
"I think we can both agree that I'm not 'young' anymore, Kyou. My birthday was a few days ago. I'm seven now." The look of indignation faded shortly thereafter and back came the reserved look. She might not have been young, but she wasn't exactly among the oldest either, she knew that. And even she knew that when it came to powers, she was at a disadvantage. Still, she had to try and plead her case, appeal to anything and everything she could.
"I know that doesn't exactly...work for my case. I've never used these abilities, I'd need to learn them but..."
But what exactly? Anya's brow furrowed, trying to think. She didn't know what abilities she could potentially have, but did Kyou honestly think they'd be raring to go right out of the gate? Did any Raevan's powers work like that under normal circumstances?
These weren't normal circumstances. These were extraordinary circumstances.
Maybe that would work in her favor.
"But the curse has kept the Virus weak, right? Maybe it'd stay that way for awhile and I'd be able to learn my powers little by little! I could handle them that way, don't you think?"
It sounded so good, so plausible. The magic kept the Virus at bay, kept it from doing anything but keeping her alive. Whenever she fed she felt better, but by no means Herculean. If the curse was removed, the powers that dwelled within her wouldn't just spring to life like some B-movie villain lying in wait for the unsuspecting hero.
It wasn't a villain, anyway. It was a part of her. She was no villain.
"E-Either way, I don't think you'd have to worry about me blowing anything up..."
It was almost a conscious stab at humor, but Anya was not known for being funny. Her eyes went from Kyou to her cup and back to Kyou again. Her gaze was borderline begging the man, especially as he went on and made her heart sink.
"So if what I'm hearing is right...You can only put the spell on someone still in the tank." The Widow spoke slowly, hurt in every word. "And if things work how I think they do then...The only way to take it off would be if I was still developing in the tank itself."
Everything about her just slumped as she said the words; shoulders, crown, wings, expression. Suddenly she was leaning forward over the table, hands going from the cup to her lavender eyes as she buried her face in them. A strangled sob came from between her fingers as he apologized and her shoulders shook.
"It's not fair!" When she finally looked up her eyes were dry but her face was contorted. Had she the means her face would have been splotchy and her eyes full of stinging, burning tears but it wasn't just powers and growth that the curse had stolen from her. She could feel them welling up behind her eyes but goddammit she could not make them come no matter how hard she tried.
"I'm not dangerous, Kyou! I promise you that I'm not or I won't be so please tell me there's something you can do! I...I can't keep going on like this! I feel like I'm trapped or stuck and I-I..."
She balled her hands into fists and rubbed at her eyes. They stung and burned, but still no tears.
"Don't I deserve a chance?!"
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