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 Posted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 10:29 am
"It makes no sense to me." Lawrence said, because it did not, and that irritated him. "You want something or you do not, you are throwing this away so I am doing you a favour."
He let go of the necklace.
"I don't know if you wanted to hurt me with this." he said, "If you thought it would somehow wake me up, but it does not. It just reminds me how pointless it is to try and understand anything when I can simply not."
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Posted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 10:40 am
Horace swallowed noisily as the necklace dropped, fingernails digging into his palms. It was good, he told himself; it was good but it still hurt to see it discarded like trash. He had not expected anything more from Jan, although perhaps he had wanted not to have to see it. "I did not want to hurt you," he said, voice low. "I came to you because I knew it would not hurt you, even though it hurts me. But I thought... I thought you m-might have waited." He bit his bottom lip, eyes directed at the floor. Then, Horace took a deep, shuddering breath and looked up at Jan, eyes a little suspiciously bright. "Bye," he said, and turned to the door.
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Posted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 10:45 am
"Well, you have reminded me once again of what I do not possess. How very kind of you." and his voice was icy.
"You showed me no mercy, I have no reason to show you any in return."
And he set his lips in a thin line, not moving to stop Horace leaving but stating. "I am glad I was of use to you once again. Use and leave."
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Posted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 10:48 am
Hand on the doorknob, he paused. For once, Jan was absolutely right. Horace stayed silent a moment. "Leave or stay and do what? I can't exactly sit down like before and mess with your hair or read in your room or... You don't want me to stay anyway."
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Posted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 11:15 am
Lawrence just closed the bin, moving away from it to sit once again on the couch, strangely robotic in his motions, clenching his hand tightly as he lowered himself.
"Can't." he repeated, mimicing the exact cadence of Horace's voice. "Don't."
"Why do I even speak at all when you could give me all my words?"
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Posted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 8:36 pm
"Then why don't you tell me? We're in your room, say as many words as you like. You can repeat mine back at me if you want. What do you want? You want me to plait your hair into tiny braids, read with you, stay?" Horace slumped against Lawr's door.
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Posted: Mon Oct 19, 2015 11:36 pm
"You have clearly made your decision already" he said coldly. "I could ask you to stay here with me, to spend time as we were but if you indulged me it would be nothing more than pity on someone you no longer respect." His cold eyes flashed with something dangerous, a hint of that irritation which often pushed him to extreme acts. "I hoped to invite you close again, I was nothing but hospitable but you are clearly capable of more cruelty than I credited you with."
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Posted: Tue Oct 20, 2015 10:45 am
"Your actions and your words always say different things, you know." Horace sighed, forcing himself to straighten up. "You made the decision for me long ago. And if I'm cruel, I guess it's because I've learned from the cruelest, Jan." Then, before he lost his nerve, Horace left, resisting the urge to slide into a puddle outside the door.
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Posted: Wed Oct 21, 2015 12:56 pm
Lawrence did not dignify Horace's comment on the duality of his words and actions with an answer. There was a cold and icy realization that Horace had only ever had any investment in the surface, the sweet hollow words. He had known it, of course he had, but time and time again he found himself tantalized by the thought that perhaps he would somehow manage to entrap a person who understood or at least ignored what lay beneath. Melvin ignored to a point, but he would also leave if the curtain was fully pulled aside and if Rin was removed from the picture. He could trick people into giving him their money, their trust, even their lives, but enduring love was where the trick really lay, that took a level of finesse he did not possess and he had it driven home every time the love someone had lied to him about seemed to extinguish the day he left.
It was only a matter of time before he was the boogeyman to Horace he was to Maja according to the accounts of his son.
"If you say so." he said, bitterly snapping. "Thanks for stopping by." at the other man's back as he left.
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