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She didn't want her to say that she was wrong anymore? Well, thankfully, she was right for once. Freya's eyes flickered up to look at Hel, eyebrows furrowing in confusion, and she frowned. "Yehr right. Yehr passing me by." Hel was her world. And off it went, in it's own little healthy, strong boat, without so much as a look back. "Why does yeh even cares anymore? And don't says yeh loves me, because love doesn't keep people fighting. Yeh knows that. Yeh knows that."

That little bubble of anger blossomed in her chest, but it popped and died just as quickly as it came. All she wanted to do was be in Hel's arms for a few minutes longer, before she abandoned her just like everyone else. If it meant stalling that moment, then she didn't really mind the pain of looking into those disappointing eyes. At least they were still there.

And she was back to being selfish. "The reason yeh wants me teh be well again, is so yehr being is enriched? Do yeh has any idea what yeh sounds like, right now? What about wantings me teh be better FOR MY SAKE, HEL?" Ahh, the bubble had finally risen, bringing color to her cheeks, and fire back into her eyes. "Why is EVERYTHING that comes out of yehr mouth about YEH? THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD, HEL! GODS!"

Freya shook, the anger coursing too hot for her weak body to handle, and her head swam. "Does yeh knows why I used teh fights, Hel? Why I wanted teh makes sure yeh were still strong, still happy? Because yeh means EVERYTHING teh me, Hel. Not because IT MAKES ME FEEL BETTER. Because it makes YEH feel better."

Freya tried to push her sisters arms away from her sides, but the lack of eating, fluids, and movement for days had left her weaker than ever. "Yeh thinks yehr so strong, so independent, so smart, and I thinks that too, for a while. But, gods help me, Hel, I WAS wrong. Yehr still just a STUPID LITTLE GHOUL WHO WANTS TEH GO PLAYS GROWN UP!"

Freya had never realized how blind her sister was to her own bullheaded mistakes. Perhaps that was partially her fault. Who had ever told Hel she was wrong, when they were younger? Freya railed against anyone who dared try to hurt Hel in any way.. she'd coddled her, and protected her, and..

.. and maybe it made Hel a little too self-righteous.

But how the hell was she going to do anything about it, now? The ghoul was set in her ways, and Freya had lost all of the strength she'd once had. All she had left was..

...

She could think of nothing.

"Yehr tryings, but I knows better. Yehr goings teh move on, and live on some land far away, all alone, and the truth is, Hel.. none of it will ever makes yeh happy. And then what? The game's over, and yeh'll have lost even when yeh were so sure yeh were winning. Maybe I am a fool for givings up, but yehr a fool for not givings up. And if that makes us both two fools who'll never be happy.. then maybe that's just the way it's goings teh be."

But when she thought about it, she didn't believe she was going to be unhappy. She knew she was a train wreck, her mind a mine field of disorder and destruction. Even so, she felt like there was hope. She supposed she hadn't sounded like she had any hope, when Hel was around. Her sister somehow managed to make Freya despair more than anyone in the-

".. Huh." The disturbing revelation made Freya sick to her stomach. She and Hel were always fighting, but she thought she loved that. She had gotten so used to it. It felt healthy, natural, normal.. now she didn't even know what those words meant, anymore.

She stared at her sister, the spitfire of a ghoul in front of her, and saw things she'd never seen before. The insecurities, the unhappiness, the barriers she'd put up to hide so much just so she could feel like everything she did was right. The image that Freya had created of her sister; built up from the ground up, towering up over her, came crumbling down to the surface.

"Hel." Freya murmured. "Yehr a mess."

She couldn't help it. When Hel chided her for only realizing that just now, Freya let out a snort of laughter. She reached up and brushed her tears out of her own eyes, before wrapping her sister up in her arms with a quick grabbing movement. She hugged Hel against her tight, burying her face into the ghouls neck. "Ja. I did. And ja. Yeh are. But yeh sucks at it."

Freya was having a little too much fun with this revelation.

She let her sister go, and tried to move herself off the bed. "Move it, fatso, I needs teh goes teh the bathroom. I haven't peed in two days."

Freya slammed face first onto the floor, letting out a pathetic screech, before she pushed herself up and held her nose. She gave her sister the dirtiest look, and then turned around, waving her not-fat a** as she walked into the bathroom.

Several pee minutes later, she came back out, her nose red but otherwise unhurt, and her arms covered in ridiculous bandages. She put her hands on the bed, and started to pull the sheets off of it. "Helps me gets this off, I don't wants Kettil seeings all this blood when he comes back next week."

Was she even the same person?

Freya looked at the window, and slumped for a moment, before shaking her head. "No, I should gets my own. He wouldn't freaks out about a broken window as much as.. well.." Holding up the sheet with multiple pools of blood spoke for itself. She balled it up tightly and threw it into her little hamper, before searching through a pile of linens for a clean set and throwing it on top of her sisters head.

"So." It was difficult, starting this particular sentence, because she knew she was about to step out of her boundaries. "Yeh wants teh tells me maybe, what started this whole introspective stuffs that makes yeh thinks it was times teh takes such drastic changes in yehr life?"

Her wings. Freya had already started to help Hel put the sheets back on the bed, but her hands slowed at the mention of the missing appendage, and an overwhelming feeling of guilt passed over her. Even then, when her sister was broken and torn from such a traumatic loss, Freya saw her as nothing but strong. And now, Freya had all but forgotten that Hel had once had wings in the first place. It was as if she'd simply pictured her sister as perfect, no matter how she was.

But she wasn't perfect, was she? She was just as ******** up as she was.

"Ja." Freya returned to tucking the sheets in, but she was slow from being lost in thought. "It makes perfect sense."

There was no way of turning back time, for either of them. All they had left was the future.

"I don't thinks the land is goings teh be enough, Hel." Freya murmured quietly. "I know yehr makings lots of plans, but.. I just.. I don't thinks any of it is enough yet. But that's all I knows, because I don't knows what will be enough for me, either. So I has no rights teh tries teh tells yeh what will be enough for yeh." She stood up straight, and started pulling her hair out of her face and back into a giant braid. "If yehr doing all this thinkings about yehr future... maybe yeh just really needs teh thinks harder. And not be scared if something comes teh minds that yeh don't likes, or don't wants teh admits."

Freya's gaze flickered up sternly when she heard her sister deny thinking too hard. She had too much experience with that particular pothole, but she said nothing about it. She just finished fixing her hair, and then sat back down on the bed. "I'm scared that I am going teh drive the only person who seems teh have the patience teh loves me, away, because I always does it." That was the easy admission - it was nothing new. But if she was going to be honest.. "I'm scared that I has no direction in life." Had she been stifling herself, once more? "But I wants one. I don't knows what it is, but I wants one."

She sniffed and flopped back down on the bed. "And yet.." Freya stared up at the ceiling, and a tiny little smile graced her features. "Maybe we'll be okays." She looked at Hel, her head tilted to rest her cheek against the bed. "Just maybe."