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 Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 7:38 pm
"Look, we can't pack that table, that's the demonstration table. It's not for sale, sir, we keep it so we can demo the product items on the table."
"Well, if you keep the table in a store that sells tables, then I would think, that perhaps it could be purchased." That would be a certain Death Division leader.
"Yes, we do sell tables, but we also sell other things, and we need to-"
"Your table has a 'for sale' sign attached to it."
"Yes, but that 'for sale' sign is not for the table, its for the lamp display on the table, see look, this is how we sell the items for di-"
"So the table does not come with the lamp."
It was at around that point that the sales attendant saw Wilson, and most importantly, Deryk, mouthing very pointedly the words 'What the ********>' to the trainee before turning around, trying his best to plaster on a fake smile. "Welcome to Home Depot, is there anything I can help you with sir?"
Caelius meanwhile, was just standing there with an expression that looked very much like 'If I don't get this ******** table, someone is going to suffer'.
Probably the same someone as the person who was going to suffer for failing a certain promotion mission in a particularly painful way.
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 8:25 pm
... Oh dear.
This was a mess. Furrowing his brow, Deryk stared between the two while his panic meter was slowly rising. That look Caelius gave him did not help much at all either. Grinning nervously, he unconsciously took a step back and away from the angry division leader while trying to think about this. The first thought was to try and tap into the computers here to alter their catalogue and whatnot but that would probably take too long. Or would it?
"Oh uh. That's a mighty fine table yes? I-it looks like its for sale. What's the price?" he asked to start things off. If this didn't work, he'd have to try something else.
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 8:47 pm
"Look is this a joke or something?" The sales clerk gave Deryk a funny look. "That table is not for sale okay, that's that, I already told that gentlemen that this is a display table and-"
- As he pointed to that gentleman, he suddenly realized that gentleman was gone. As in not there any more. He simply shrugged, seeing it for the better.
Somewhere else in the department store was a rather loud crash that kind of sounded like thousands of tiny, fragile things breaking apart. The sales clerk, and several other people nearby, all paused for a second, before quickly gravitating towards the source.
Basically, it left Deryk, Wilson, and an unattended table, the very one that a certain Death Division leader required at all costs as pertinent to another trainee's immediate survival.
Ironically, dying from tables was probably not the oddest death to happen in Deus Ex Machina.
Thankfully, there was also a catalog computer nearby.
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 8:56 pm
"N-no not a joke. It re-"He didn't get to finish as he soon noticed that Caelius had vanished again. That.. couldn't be a good sign. And indeed, it wasn't, as he heard some loud crashes off in the distance. Deryk's jaw dropped. Panic meter was filled pretty quickly. "Shitshitshitshithsitshtishtishitshitshit! O-one of you guys go look for him. Try to keep him from destroying this building. Yes? Uh.. someone else watch my back. Gonna try something quick. Manthisreallysucks," Deryk whined before running to the nearest computer. Looking around, he grabbed the mouse and keyboard and started to see how he was going to break into this. Oh right. The trainee also grabbed his phone, ran over to the table and took a picture of it. He then ran back and resumed his work.
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 8:59 pm
Wilson nervously stared at Caelius and the sales attendant. A part of him wanted to chuckle at the conversation the two were having, but then again this was Caelius, and Caelius was dead serious about s**t. Apparently this included purchasing tables that were not for sale. Feeling pity for the employee, he uneasily offered the stranger an apologetic smile and hoped he would take it as a half-baked apology for his leader’s behavior. People simply do not just buy display tables willy nilly, okay Caelius?
He shot Deryk a confused look. What? They were actually going to try and buy the tab—Caelius was gone. His eyes widened and he looked around, searching for him. This was definitely not good. A cacophony of shattered objects—Wilson winced at the damage costs—pulled the attendant and many people toward the source. They were alone. He turned toward Deryk. “Um. What now?” A part of him wondered if this was Caelius’ subtle cue to steal the table.
neutral Hopefully not.
Wilson gave Ariane and Robert a quick look before he raised an arm. "I guess I'll go do it. Wish me luck, guys." It looks like Wilson was really going to need it. He stalked off toward the source.
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 9:19 pm
Her jacket was removed and put on the clothes rack as she followed everyone else through the portal. Arriving at... Home deport? Although as she listened to Caelius' instructions, she couldn't help but feel that this was more like 'Deryk Deport', where 'deport' meant certain doom.
"We should steal the table," She whispered excitedly to Deryk, Wilson and Robert after everyone was gone, "I've always wanted to steal a table." Only not really.
"... Or we could look it up on the catalog."
She might had sighed. Sadly. Disappointedly even.
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 9:33 pm
Somewhere in the distance, the sound of more things breaking, combined now with what sounded like several people screaming and - was that the smell of fire? - littered the once peaceful world known as Home Depot.
Deryk had better start working really fast. OOC: Relocating A Certain Someone -At this point it seems probably like a better idea to grab the table and run. Maybe. Hopefully. Before you know, the police come. - The table however is also very very heavy, being made out of solid oak and all, and probably requires four people to carry. Yes, in fact, yes it requires exactly four people to carry. EXACTLY. - Each person much grab an edge of the table and roll a 6-sided dice. If ANY person rolls a 6, they drop the table, and have to try again. So if person A rolls okay, person B rolls okay and person C rolls a 6, they have to try again. Continue trying until the table is successfully lifted. Good luck!
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 9:39 pm
"Aaaaaaaah thisissobad," Deryk murmured while working at the computer some more. Though, it seemed like he was just about out of time. It would have been nicer to just hack into the system and add the table to the inventory, but no. Cael had to go break things. "Don't got enough time. Let's take the table and run. Man it looks heavy.. Ughhh... why gotta break all the things," he whined before rushing back to the table. Text to Wilson Come back quick. Taking the table. Need all the hands.
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 9:48 pm
Wilson hadn’t made it too far when he received the text. When he read the message he had an inkling feeling that they hadn’t paid for the table, but oh well. He rushed back toward the others and stood by one of the table’s free corners. He seemed slightly disappointed. “So we’re stealing it after all?”
"Yeah. On three."
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Dragain rolled 1 6-sided dice:
3
Total: 3 (1-6)
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 9:54 pm
"Stop being a p***y," Ariane looked delighted, actually, too delighted. The moment everyone was ready, she grinned and grabbed her side of the table, "One... Two... THREE." She was at least making the effort to not say that too loudly.
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Blade Kuroda rolled 1 6-sided dice:
6
Total: 6 (1-6)
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 9:57 pm
"Yeah. Gonna steal. Don't have enough time to break into their inventory system. Not with... Cael on rampage."
Deryk just whined while trying to lift when Ariane counted 3.
Only, he sort of failed. Heavy lifting wasn't really something he was good at. And he actually managed to drop it.
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Dragain rolled 1 6-sided dice:
6
Total: 6 (1-6)
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 10:00 pm
"You suck."
As if to prove her point, she purposely dropped the table and huffed.
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Blade Kuroda rolled 1 6-sided dice:
2
Total: 2 (1-6)
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 10:01 pm
"Youdroppedittoo."
With a grunt, the death trainee held on, trying to carry it a little more.
"Comeoncomeon."
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Syusaki rolled 1 6-sided dice:
6
Total: 6 (1-6)
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 10:03 pm
Wilson laughed nervously when he dropped the table. Ah ha...this wasn't going to be fun.
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Dragain rolled 1 6-sided dice:
4
Total: 4 (1-6)
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 10:03 pm
"I did it on purpose, to show you how stupid you looked."
A pause.
"Wilson, I expected better from you."
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