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 Posted: Sat Apr 02, 2011 5:24 pm
The pup allowed Ren to help him sit down on the edge of the tub, and watched with only a hollow interest as the tap was turned and the gryphon tested the water. Usually he would be very happy at the thought of a bath, and after the salt and sand, grit and blood and whatnot on that island he thought he would have appreciated a real good soak, but his heart just wasn't in it.
He tensed up as Ren tried to take the emblem from him, clutching it tighter for a moment before letting go and dropping his hand to help support himself on the edge of the tub.
Ren needed him to... oh. Jove glanced down at his shirt, and moved to touch his wounded side as if in a daze, looking at the dark blood that was once again oozing through the fabric. It had been like this on the island too. He was completely silent as he tried to tug his good arm out of his shirt, not even a scowl or a blush or a twitch of his one good ear speaking to the older boil. Just a hint of painful concentration as he slipped the shirt over his head.
At that point the extent of his damages would be very obvious. The bruises that seemed to naturally occur on his side now spread towards the center of his chest, and the skin was dark and split open along his ribs. Even his shoulder was bruised and swollen, no doubt the reason for his difficulties using that arm. There was no doubt they would extend down past his hip as well. But aside from the occasional pained wince, Jove didn't seem to care about the wounds.
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Posted: Sat Apr 02, 2011 6:08 pm
He did not help Jove with his shirt. Or rather, Ren had started to, but he realized he would not be of much use, and it was something Jove had to do on his own. It pained him to watch the way he struggled, the way he bit down on his lower lip, eyes screwed up, wincing as he finally managed to get the shirt over his head.
Ren almost wished he had kept the shirt on. What lay underneath was slightly horrifying, to say the least. Jove's entire left side was one mass of dark, mottled purplish blue, the bruise extending out from under his arm, across his ribcage, and spreading out over a good half of his chest. What skin wasn't touched by the bruises showed a myriad of tiny cuts and nicks, most likely from falling debris, and there was a nasty looking gash across his ribs, in the middle of the bruising. His shoulder was swollen - most likely why Jove wasn't able to extend his arm very far - and the cut was bleeding, dripping red onto the bathtub.
Nausea rose in Ren's throat, but he clamped down on it, closing his eyes briefly. No, right now was not the time to be sick; he needed to take care of his little brother.
Dipping the washcloth into the water again, Ren pressed it against Jove's side, his fingers trembling slightly as he wiped, firmly but carefully. That look in Jove's eyes - the deadened, hollow one - it scared him. Ren felt ill at ease, useless, and he kept wiping until the blood had all gone and the water in the tub had turned a pale red.
"Does it..." Ren faltered, swallowing hard. "Does it hurt anywhere else, Jove..?"
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Posted: Sat Apr 02, 2011 6:44 pm
Jove stayed perfectly still during Ren's ministrations, if anything he seemed more relaxed as the blood was wiped from his tender skin, rather than tensing up in pain. It felt better being clean. He glanced down at the bath, and for an instant he felt a desire for a real bath, but it faded as he realized the red in the water was blood. There had been too much blood lately. He looked back up at Ren, and spent the rest of the washcloth bath watching at his brother alone.
He seemed almost startled to be asked if he was hurting anywhere else. It was just his side, every part of his side, but it didn't seem important. If anything that pain just reminded him he was still alive and not dreaming.
Jove reached out with his good arm, and put it on his brother's chest. It really hurt there, more than anything.
The pup needed time to rest up, and more immediately a bandage for his side, but what he needed most of all during the healing process was Ren.
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Posted: Sat Apr 02, 2011 7:54 pm
Once finished with cleaning the cut on Jove's side, Ren wrung out the reddened washcloth, twisting it tightly to get rid of all the liquid. The nausea threatened to rise again, but Ren pushed it back, closing his eyes as he shook out the cloth. He turned on the hot water again, cleaning out the inside of the tub to try and rid it of any reminders of what had happened, but the blood was stubborn, and even after he had scrubbed for quite a few moments, there was still a faint tinge of red around the drain.
He gave up on it, leaning back to return his attentions to his little brother, resting his arms on either side of Jove on the tub as he knelt down in front of him. One hand - his good hand - raised, lightly brushing Jove's hair from his face. "You sure you're okay?" He asked, eyebrows drawing together in concern. There was still worry there that Jove was injured elsewhere, but he was stopped in his movements when he felt a small hand on his chest.
Ren stopped. His eyes moved downwards. Tiny fingers were pressed to his shirtfront, and Jove's eyes were still dead, but there was something else there, something that Ren recognized.
He blinked several times, trying to ignore the way his vision blurred slightly, leaning forward and gently wrapping his arms around Jove's tiny body, pulling the boil against him in an embrace.
"Yeah," Ren whispered, his voice low. "Yeah, it hurts there for me too."
He pressed his face into Jove's hair, inhaling his scent, and then moved back, pressing a kiss to Jove's forehead. Then he retreated fully, resting back on his legs.
"Let me do something about that tangled hair of yours."
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Posted: Sat Apr 02, 2011 8:24 pm
Jove made a little noise in his throat as he was hugged, it was hard to tell if it was from the physical pain or the emotional pain that got to him. But Ren just looked so sad... That's what hurt most.
He sat still for another minute after Ren let him out of the hug, and let his eyes close for a second as he felt the kiss on his forehead. Deep inside he knew a part of him would have been indignant and resistant, pulling away, or scowling and covering Ren's mouth to tell him to stop it. It should have been embarrassing... But right at that moment Jove just felt more relaxed, the numbness giving way ever so slightly so he could feel some comfort.
Without waiting for Ren to grab the comb or brush on the counter, or even move to a more comfortable position, Jove slipped off the edge of the tub to sit on the floor and lean against his friend for hair brushing.
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Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2011 8:34 am
Jove's body was small; the boil was skinny, all bony knees and poky elbows, and his ribs were visible beneath the pale teal skin he had, which made the bruises just that more obvious, that much more painful. Ren brushed his fingers across Jove's forehead briefly as he moved back, running them over his hair. The puppy hadn't moved away when he had kissed him, which meant that either he was too tired and dead inside to be stubborn over Ren's shows of affections, or he was finally accepting the fact that Ren was an overly physically touchy person. And Ren did not feel it was the latter one, which meant that there was still something wrong with his little brother.
Jove had slipped off the side of the tub, moving to grab the brush before leaning against him. Ren took the brush and comb from the shelf and moved to sit on the floor, his back against the wall, pulling Jove to sit with his back against his chest, his legs on either side of him. He set the brush down, selecting the comb first, and carefully began to work it through the tangled strands, no longer fluffy or silky. Instead they felt like straw in his hands, slightly oily and messy. Ren reached a hand up, fumbling with the sink, and dipped the comb in the water, bringing it back to Jove's head.
"Tell me if it hurts," Ren said gently, then lapsed into silence as he worked, biting back the urge to just put his arms around the puppy and hug him forever. A pause. Then - "...I died, Jove."
He hadn't meant to say it; in fact, it had just tumbled from his lips unintentionally and Ren felt his throat grow dry. "It...hurt," he whispered. "And the others saw it happen."
He would never forgive himself for that.
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Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2011 1:01 pm
Jove tipped his head back as Ren started combing through his hair, letting his eyes close for a minute before wiggling sideways, so he leaned his shoulder against Ren instead of his back. He rested his good leg over Ren's, with his other lamely folding beside his tail. The more he moved the less it seemed to ache, but it still refused to behave. Leaning against the gryphon wasn't good enough, he wanted to see him too.
The pup idly took the brush and ran it through what he could reach of his friend's hair, which amounted to little more than the blonde tips. It was a challenge brushing it at that awkward angle but he wasn't going to attempt it with his bad arm.
His movements stilled ever so briefly when Ren admitted what Jove had feared. That couldn't be right, the gryphon was warm and solid, and he had a heartbeat. Dead things didn't have a beating heart. How had he come back? The pup swallowed hard, thinking of all the others he had seen die. Junko and Seiji... Surely they hadn't been so lucky. Jove dropped the brush into his lap as all those memories flooded back, memories of his friends and peers dying, and those visions in the fog that had played back his own traumatic death. He didn't need to be aware of the significance to be haunted by that experience.
The pup once again clenched his fingers around a handful of Ren's shirt, as though he was afraid his brother was about to be snatched away from him at any moment. Not by death, that threat had passed, but by fear, and pain, and all that emotional anguish he could hear in his friend's voice. He was holding on for a very dear life indeed.
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Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2011 4:07 pm
Ren put a hand on Jove's knee, helping him to sling his leg over his, the boil's shoulder against his chest. It should have been uncomfortable, but it wasn't; in fact, Ren felt more secure being able to see his little brother's face. He felt the puppy take the brush from his fingers, reaching up with small hands to brush Ren's hair - which was, in fact, quite mussed from sleep. Jove's reach didn't go too far; he just managed to get to the ends, and Ren ducked his head, leaning over so that he could move the brush further.
Except Jove had stopped brushing now, his face stricken. Ren's heart seized. I shouldn't have told him, he thought frantically, wishing he could backtrack and take back the words he had just said. I should have just let things the way they were.
But the way they were wasn't good either. In fact, nothing was right, unless they could all rewind and go back to before the field trip - and that was impossible.
The brush fell from Jove's fingertips. Ren looked at it, before his eyes flickered unhappily back up to Jove's face. He could feel the boil's fingers, tight on the front of his shirt, and Ren's arms slipped around Jove's waist, tugging the smaller boil towards him, resting his chin on the top of Jove's head.
"I'm not dead now, though," Ren said quietly. "I'm not dead."
Maybe if he kept repeating it, he'd remember why he was happy to be alive. Jove was a good enough reason, wasn't he? And LW, and Gabrian, and Alessa; they were all reasons why he should feel happy he was alive. Except he didn't. All Ren felt was a sort of deadness inside, a bleak coldness.
He hugged Jove tighter. "I'm not dead," he whispered, pressing his face into Jove's hair. "I'm not dead, I'm not dead, I'm not dead..."
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Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2011 4:55 pm
The little pup fairly pressed his head against Ren's chest, listening to his friend's heartbeat as much as his voice. No, he wasn't dead, he was right where he needed to be as far as the little pup was concerned.
When he met his brother's glance it was full of that empty desperation. Ren didn't have to be happy right away, it was impossible to expect so much after the difficulties they had both been through, but he needed the older boil to stay with him, and not slip so far into despair that he lost the will to keep moving forward. How could either of them go forward and heal if the other decided to stay behind?
His little fingers tightened on Ren's shirt as he was hugged, as though it were the only thing keeping his friend safely tethered in reality. He even went so far as to cling with his left hand as well.
The warmth of the hug compared to the cool air in the bathroom made the pup want to wriggle deeper into the embrace, to let that warmth seep back into his cold little body and remind him that he was safe here. Safe and sound. He clenched his fingers tighter as Ren pulled him close, taking comfort from the embrace even as the pain of the hug made him whimper. No, Ren was most definitely not dead with a grip like that. Jove tried to bite back the slight noise, he wanted the gryphon to hug him until it hurt all over if that's what would make Ren feel better. This pain was only transient.
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Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2011 7:00 pm
He had the feeling he was hurting Jove, holding him so tightly, but Ren did not want to let go. His fingers were shaking where they were holding onto the puppy's little body, and he breathed in the familiar scent of his little brother; a vague earthiness and a hint of something sweet that was purely Jove and nobody and nothing else. It was a scent that had grown overwhelmingly familiar to Ren. That, combined with Jove's own way of communicating; the scowls, the small huffs, the looks, and the pats, they were all something Ren treasured. He did not ever want to lose them again; Jove was far too precious to him.
He did not like feeling this attached; it only meant that it would be all the more painful if anything happened to Jove.
Finally pulling back, Ren glanced down at Jove's arm, his eyebrows drawing together. He ran his fingers down the boil's shoulder, then his wrist, carefully lifting it up, then down, as if testing it. It was not broken, but it was badly swollen, perhaps sprained.
"You're going to need a sling for this," he said. "I have something I can use for that, but it's in my room. Do you want to come with me to get it?"
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Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2011 7:20 pm
The pup stifled all further pained noises as Ren hugged him, so tightly his ribs ached even after the gryphon released his grip. Had it done any good, squishing Jove until he sank like mush into Ren's arms? He wasn't afraid of that desperate show of affection, for some reason it was almost cathartic, being loved so much it hurt. Literally.
When he first met Ren he would have scowled, but when the hug eased up he glanced up and snuggled against the older boil of his own accord.
His eyes followed Ren's glance, and watched with only the vaguest hint of curiosity as his weak hand was removed from the boil's shirt, and the arm tested to figure out the severity of the injury. He was relieved Ren knew what he was doing, the little ghost had no idea why it wasn't working right. His good ear perked ever so slightly. Many would mistake the almost imperceptible twitch as just that, a twitch, but surely his brother could see the faint attentiveness for what it was. Would a sling make his arm work right again?
At the question he nodded, but made no effort to actually get up and find something to wear. To be honest, he wasn't sure he could get up from the floor so easily.
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Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2011 7:52 pm
Jove snuggles were some of the best, Ren decided. He had always loved cuddling and hugs and any sort of physical affection, but when it came down to it, Jove was definitely up there in Ren's favorite people to snuggle with Especially now, when both of them needed it, when both of them were just trying to cling to the fact that they were both alive, and here with each other.
It was obvious Jove lacked the strength to stand, but from that ear that flicked ever so slightly, Ren could see that Jove was curious about the sling. Or perhaps curious was not exactly the best word. Whatever it was, it was a good sign. Ren carefully extracted himself out from beside Jove, stepping back into the bedroom for a brief moment. When he reappeared he was holding the blanket from his bed, and he wrapped it around Jove's shoulders. In one easy movement he swept Jove up into his arms, holding him bridal style. The position made his bad hand ache, but Ren ignored it, and instead carried his little brother to the door. It took a little finagling to get unlock and open the door, but once he had, Ren determinedly carted Jove out of his room.
It only took a few moments to cross the campus to the monster dorms. It was still early morning, and there were perhaps only one or two students out and about. Ren made his way into the building, up the stairs, and quietly pushed open the door to his room. It was empty - the others had left a note saying they had gone out to get breakfast and would be back soon - so Ren gently set Jove down on the bed and went to find what he was looking for. Digging around in his closet, he came back a second later with a long bandanna, dark blue in color.
He eyed Jove. "Actually, we should get a shirt on you and some bandages first."
Ren moved to the dresser again, grabbing one of his sweaters. He rarely wore them, and Jove tended to borrow them when he needed clothes anyway, so Ren tucked it over his arm and disappeared into the bathroom, looking for bandages. He came back a second later, several of them piled in his arms. He dumped everything on the bed.
"Hold tight for a second," Ren told Jove, swallowing back the nausea as he sat beside the puppy, looking at the cut again as he began to wrap it.
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Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2011 8:13 pm
Jove's ear flopped right back again as Ren got up off the floor and left, leaving the pup to sit forlornly on the cold floor. He was very afraid for a moment, not wanting to be left alone even though Ren said he would be right back. When the gryphon did come back Jove almost wiggled right into his arms.
The comforting effect of being carried around in that blanket was almost immediate, and the tired pup relaxed during the short walk from one dorm to another. The blanket was almost like a hammock, soft and gentle. When he realized they had arrived at Ren's dorm he didn't want to be put down.
And when he was put down, he just sank into the blankets, little more than a child-sized lump in the covers. He lifted his nose and gave a quick sniff, taking in all the scents he loved in that room, like cookies, and his fellow foxfires, and most of all, Ren. The sheets and pillows would be like that too, completely saturated with friendly scents. He could have lay around on that bed all day with Ren, but the gryphon had other worries.
Jove was quick to notice the sick expression on Ren's face, and his blank expression wilted into something more hollow.
It was the state of his body that did it, made his brother look so unhappy and upset. Jove didn't know what to do. So he settled for a droopy eared look of despair as Ren attempted to wrap the clean bandages around his middle. Now more than ever he wanted to cover up, just so the older boil wouldn't have to be so disturbed by his appearance.
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Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2011 9:13 pm
Once he had finished recleaning and bandaging the cut, Ren carefully pressed medical tape over the bandages to keep it on. Then, using his good hand, he swept everything that wasn't necessary off of the bed and onto the floor, not caring that they splattered everywhere and he had probably just made a mess. Instead, Ren reached for the sweater, tugging it over Jove's head. It went on easily, since it was obviously too big for him, and it was made of a soft, dark grey cashmere with tiny light pinstripes overtop. Once he had made sure Jove was secure, Ren picked up the bandanna.
"Let's see here..." he murmured, mostly to himself, and gingerly tied the ends of it together in a good, solid knot. He then slipped it over Jove's head, settling it carefully against his shoulder, and lifted his arm, sliding it into the sling. Once he was finished, Ren stepped back, surveying his "handiwork." Surprisingly, the bandanna seemed to work well as a sling, and Ren was satisfied, at least that he had done something good. It almost made him feel like his old self.
Almost. The blackness was still embedded deep into his heart, contorting his mind and his thoughts. Ren's fingers were trembling as he crawled onto the bed, pulling Jove to lay with him. "Do you..." A pause. Ren swallowed hard. "Do you want some cookies? I think...I think Alessa brought me some, um..."
He rummaged around in the table beside his bed, his fingers feeling awkward and heavy until he found the small plastic bag. He held them in front of him, offering them to Jove first, hoping the boil would take one. He hated that look on his face - the hollow grief, the despair, the deadness - it was killing Ren inside.
"Here," he said softly, his voice barely above a whisper. "Take one."
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Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2011 9:30 pm
Jove could not have asked for a more considerate brother, once the bandages were wrapped and taped he was handled so gently he barely even felt a twinge in his side. And with the sling supporting his arm it eased up the pain in his shoulder to a great degree. Ren might not have made it work right like the pup had hoped, but this was clearly the next best thing.
He wiggled his fingers hesitantly, and then let his arm rest. In a way it almost felt like a hug having the sling pressing against his back and opposite shoulder. No, this was good.
With his physical experimentation over he let Ren pull him down on the bed and looked up at him with a weary grateful expression.
But... cookies? Jove's face fell slightly, he didn't feel like eating anything. Not even Alessa's delicious cookies. Instead of taking one to nibble on he looked off to the side, away from Ren's eyes. No, he didn't want to eat, he just needed more rest, and more time. The pup nudged his head against Ren's chest and left it there, a silent apology for lapsing back into his ghostly nature and refusing sustenance.
Maybe later he would have a cookie, if only to see Ren smile again.
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