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 Posted: Tue Feb 15, 2011 9:16 pm
Paris smiled at Ladon's reassurance, and though he was still a bit anxious that things might blow up again if a certain someone happened to be around when he dropped by, he figured he'd work through that if and when it happened. He just needed to rise above... be a better person, or something like that.
His smile was short lived, replaced by a frown as soon as Ladon questioned him, and silence hung heavy in the air. What was he supposed to say to that? He knew he wouldn't be able to brush it off and pretend as if everything were fine and sound like he actually meant it. Things were far from fine. How could he explain it without telling the truth? He couldn't just make up something. It wasn't as if there were a lot of things that got him this down. Yeah, school sucked, but he got over that quickly enough so that excuse wouldn't work, and he couldn't blame relationship troubles since he wasn't even in an actual relationship.
"I..." he began, then paused, still unsure of what to say. "I guess I've just been feeling kind of down lately. It's not really a big deal," he said, trying to play it off. "My mom came down when I broke my wrist, so I had to deal with that. She likes to try and smother me when she pretends to be an actual mother, and then she actually had the nerve to suggest that I go to New York with her."
Family drama was easy enough to blame. Ladon had experience with that, so he would know how frustrating it could be.
"It just sucks. I hate dealing with her. I've been doing just fine without her, so whenever she tries it's just... it's really annoying," he finished, figuring that was good enough for an explanation. "I'll get over it eventually. My wrist just hurts and the brace is very unsexy, and Mom on top of that is just crappy." But being here made things better. Getting presents and cuddling was more comforting than anything he could have done on his own.
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Posted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 12:17 pm
Paris never really spoke about his mother, which was why Ladon was surprised she was mentioned. In fact, he thought she was out of the picture entirely, so to find that she actually visited was a bit of a shock. From day one of meeting Paris, Ladon had found out that his mother was a big button issue he shouldn't touch with a hundred foot pole, and he made sure not to. Seeing as he barely spoke about his own family, it was a silent agreement between them. He wondered exactly the story was about Paris' family, but seeing as he had never been to his place or heard much about them, he never pushed it. He always worried that pushing any issue with Paris would wind up breaking their fragile friendship and that was the last thing he wanted.
To hear that she offered to take him to New York, a place far more notable than Destiny City and no doubt something Ladon felt would appeal to Paris, who liked nice things and was pursuing dancing, he became worried. A frown settled on him, and his brow creased in concern, but there was a selfish relief in feeling that he hated his mother enough not to leave.
Smiling a tad bit, he looked down. "I'm glad you didn't go. I'd miss you." He would, terribly. "…and hey, you could probably pull off a paper bag. I don't think a little brace could keep you down." He said, stopping his rubbing of Paris' back just to hold him. With that unknown moment of almost loosing Paris to New York and his mother, he felt possessive of him.
"…I’m glad you told me though. I don't like seeing you down. If you ever need to talk, you know I'll listen. I've had enough family problems to maybe understand a little of what you might be going through. At least I'd try."
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Posted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 5:22 pm
He didn't know which he felt more: relieved that Ladon had bought his story -- which wasn't entirely untruthful -- or frustrated with himself for lying and making excuses. This just wasn't how he did things. Keeping secrets like this went against everything he believed about truth and honestly. He almost felt ashamed -- would have if he weren't trying to convince himself that it was for the best. What was the point of dragging Ladon into all this? It would be selfish of him, and though Paris would readily admit that he was a selfish and petty person, he cared about Ladon too much to pull him into something that was so dangerous.
This wasn't like all the other things he got himself into -- the drinking and the partying and the progression from boy to boy, man to man. This was ******** magic and crazy weaponry and a war he didn't care about and barely understood. It was life and death and too complicated already without making Ladon a part of it.
He smiled lightly at Ladon's comment about the paper bag, and he soon found himself laughing at the idea, though it was a bit quieter and more restrained than usual. "If only your opinion was the only one that matter, Lady." It did matter, of course, but he had other people to impress as well, and not all of them were as easy to please as his friend.
Paris laid against him for a little longer, appreciating the comfort and the offer to talk, even if he worried that if he talked too much he'd reveal the real reason behind his recent depression. He nodded to let Ladon know he understood, and that he would take him up on it whenever he needed to. After a few more moments of cuddling against him and wallowing in his poor mood, Paris lifted his head and smiled a bit wider.
"I feel like doing something," he said. "Not right now, but soon. I kinda feel like I should try something different. Sorta like how people go out and chop off all their hair after a nasty break up, only I don't want to cut my hair 'cause I'm trying to grow it out. Maybe another tattoo, or a piercing, or you and I could just go out and do something or go somewhere fun. You know, act young and alive. We've been so busy with other things we haven't really had the time to act our age." He didn't expect Ladon to want to do some of the things Paris usually did, but just going out and being a teenager would be good enough for him. "You're so serious all the time anyway. You need to do something wild... or semi-wild... not something you wouldn't like, obviously, but something out of the ordinary, at least..."
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Posted: Wed Feb 16, 2011 10:12 pm
He certainly didn't mind the quiet holding simply because he knew Paris needed it, and he even felt comfortable now, wanting to close his eyes and even sleep a bit. He blamed this on the bad habit of Paris coming over and the pair of them usually falling asleep on the couch now or in those moments when Paris wanted to creep into his room and claim the bed with him. It didn't bother him seeing as he was sure in their mutual agreement of nothing meaning more than friendship, and yes, he did feel that was possible. It was better than that considering he already had someone filling the romance department.
When he felt the blonde shirt, he looked back down to see him look up again, and then blinked in surprise. "Another?" He started, thinking of the fact that Paris had a tattoo. Then that lead to WHAT the tattoo could be and where exactly it was. Then he remembered that he already saw it and smacked his forehead. Duh! Still, another didn't seem like the best idea, despite the previous one having had a lot of thought behind it. The piercing idea gave another surprised look to Paris, not really for that idea either. "Going out and doing something sounds fun. I wouldn't mind getting out and just …doing something with you. Hanging out here in the apartment isn't that great after all." He didn't even have a TV yet and was making due with the laptop he took from his mother's place for music along with his Ipod. "Um…even if it's as little bit wild. You can pick." Seeing as he sort of felt the more he hanged around Billy and Paris, the more he felt he didn't do much of what other kids his age were doing. He was behind in so much and couldn't say he did a lot in that time. That and he was sure it would be helpful to perk up Paris' mood. "I need to try new things more often anyways." He just hoped he wouldn't regret acting wild. Well, it was worth a shot.
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Posted: Thu Feb 17, 2011 11:36 am
There didn't need to be romance or any other sort of physical relations in order to cuddle. Paris even liked it better this way. It was less complicated, and didn't have all those other expectations to go along with it. It was sweet and simple and warm, and much more meaningful to him than anything else he could be getting up to tonight.
He went back to resting his head on Ladon's shoulder when Ladon agreed, adjusting his hold on his swan a bit so it didn't get too smushed or lost between them. "I feel like I should do something new, too. The clubs and bars are great, but I do it so often it's not as exciting as it used to be, and I wouldn't force you to go to one of those places anyway. A party would be okay, depending on the people and what sort of stuff was going on. Last year I went to a beach party and there was a bonfire, and we just played those stupid games like Never Have I Ever and Truth or Dare and Spin the Bottle, and we ran around and had fun." He didn't want to force Ladon into something so far out of his element that he was horribly uncomfortable, but at the same time he wanted fun and excitement and simplicity. "I guess it might be a little cold still for something like that, though. I can't wait until summer. There'll be a lot more for us to do then."
He tried to think of other things. He spent so much time sneaking into the adult scene that he sometimes forgot he was only sixteen -- almost seventeen. What did kids their age usually do anyway? Lazer tag, and paintball, and video games, and rollerblading, and karaoke. Things like that, right? Activities that they could do together or in a group, and just goof off and do silly things and laugh and laugh and laugh, and forget that they had family drama and responsibilities to things that no teenager should ever have to worry about.
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Posted: Mon Feb 21, 2011 8:53 pm
Comfortable and warm, he rested on the futon, not at all minding Paris and feeling quick happy that his moment of panic and guilt had subsided and was now simply proud that his gift was well received. Still, there was a note of something sad in that he thought of summer and his own age. What Paris was suggesting, bomb fires and clubs, were all things he never did. He had principles, yes, but sometimes he wondered if he was missing out on a lot too. Was he being a coward and would he later regret not living as much as he should and acting his age? He did a lot too many that should never be asked of anything, especially a teenager, and he often felt heavy with the responsibility set upon his shoulders, the independence that left him working hard to survive, and his own goals that wore him down. Sometimes he thought of kids his age doing nothing but going home, having dinner and all the troubles of the world already taken care of, and having endless free time to just act their age.
"I'd like that. To go out and do something with you. I feel like I'm missing out sometimes, ya know? Might be fun to just….be a little crazy. Get my fill in before I get too old." He looked down at his friend. "Maybe help stop being such a prude. " He smiled, as if that was even possible. "…just a little anyways." He leaned his head back, looking at the ceiling, a few likes streaming in from the window. "Life's got a little crazy. I think we could go out and act a little crazy too. Might do me some good." He could do with some normal craziness in his otherwise insane life. "…..but no tattoos."
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