Welcome to Gaia! ::

It has been a long time since the world seemed a mysterious place to me. I guess I've grown disheartened with the humdrum existance my life had become. The reservation is a depressing plance, on depressed lands and filled with depressed people. Watching their daily struggle has hardened me to the beauty of my culture and the magic of life.

There were fourteen suicides last year. The children are holing themselves up in each others houses and "huffing" anything they can get their hands on. Glue, starting fluid, gasoline... sometims they are left with damage that just can't be fixed. They are destroying their minds, one day at a time.

Not that their minds are overly enriched by our inferior, poorly funded schooling.

Perhaps they need the escape that these things provide... getting high, death... with alcoholic parents and poverty all around. It is hard to understand the struggle of our people, especially to those "outside". It is hard for them to understand why things are the way that they are.

I understand, I do. And it has taken all the magic from my life. I was walking flesh, dead flesh, until the magic found me.

And now I've been entrusted with this staff, or "wand" as it was called, that is said to house the soul of a great thunderbird. One that has chosen me to help it at a second chance of life. And what is crazier than that? That I believe.

Oh, how I believe. I hold this relic in my hands, and I can feel the energy inside ready to burst forth. And so I talk to it, cradle it, sing to it... if anyone saw me, I would be locked away.

I have taken to rubbing bear oils on the aging wood each day, and while I perform the task, my mind dances with the stories of my people. The stories that grandfather told me, that I had forgotten since my childhood.

My spirit leaps, and my heart sings. There is magic in the world!

I've visited the wand shop once again. The entire time I was walking there, I felt like I was in some sort of a half dream, very unsure of myself. But when I arrived, there was everything as I remembered it, very dusty and real.

This time when I visited the headquarters, there was another woman there. A red-headed white woman, with a wand that had the mist-spirit that Ianna mentioned rising from its tip. It moved and flowed with a will of its own, and watching it this entire experience has become all-the-more real.

It was good to speak with her. She answered some of my questions, and reassured me that this experience was difficult for quite a few people. It made me feel better about my doubts and failings.

I've gained a new loyalty to the wand that has entrusted me. I feel the desire to learn as much as I can about it, so I have called Grandfather, and arranged to meet with him tomorrow to hear the legend of the great thunderbird. I will bring the wand with me... perhaps the story will comfort and ease it.

Time passes, as it always had before, but the presance of this whisping wand makes each day extraordinary. I need only to look upon the blue mist to feel that there is much in the world that is waiting to be discovered.

It is a good feeling, not knowing everything. The arcane and obscure leave me with a sense of wonder. I feel so alive!

I speak to my little Too-ya-la-kekt many times a day, telling him all the stories of my grandfather. I can not say that I know it is a "him", only that I feel it somewhere inside me. Each day that passes, I feel a deeper bond with both wand and whisp, and a greater duty toward each.

The wisp floats about, I believe, with purpose. When I hold up the silver thunderbird pendant it meanders slowly toward it, as if to explore, sometimes lighting upon it like a butterfly, in a carress. I do believe he listens.

There I go saying "he" again. Perhaps I am mistaken, but I do not think so. Too-ya-la-kekt seems to enjoy the stories of battle the most, creeping forward as if sitting upon edge.

I think I shall purchase a drum, and find out if he responds to music.

It had been more than a couple of weeks since Archie had left the house for anything more than groceries, and with Dixie off doing Gaia knew what lately, the former criminal figured her strange wand could do with a little time away from the house too. The problem was, he didn't know exactly what a stick with a bit of wavery mist on the end liked to do for fun. He was currently wandering down the street toward the park, holding the wand out in front of him like a ward against evil.

The wisp just wiggled about, seemingly happy to be outside at all.

Sara Two-moons was simply enjoying the day, taking a short walk in the park near her neighborhood. As always, she clutched Too-ya-la-kekt's staff protectively to her body, ever cautious of the blue wisp that swirled and danced from the tip.

Another guardian was the last thing the woman had expected to see, but nonetheless before five minutes had passed, there came a man holding his wand out like a band-leader in a parade. She stopped in her tracks, simply watching him for a while... he wasn't one that she recognized, though the telltale wand and wisp identified him more than recognition could anyhow.

"Okay kid," Archie said to the wisp, "we're stopping." He picked out a spot near a tree and a bench, choosing to instead plop down in the grass. It was shady and fairly close to some guy selling water and a small pond, what more could they ask for by way of scenery? Archie looked around for a bit before wedging the wand between two of the slats on the bench. "There."

His eyes scanned the area, landing on a striking woman in possession of a colorful piece of wood. Archie didn't want to presume, but maybe they were Stick Buddies! His stick wasn't even his, but surely it could make friends without Dixie being around?

If the woman had wanted to hide, that time was now over. Fortunately Sara Two-moons had not, and when the man met her glance a short distance away, she saw it only fitting to introduce herself. Advancing toward the park bench, she dipped her head in a sort of greeting and a smile graced her swarthy-skinned face. When she spoke, her voice was quiet but clear and unafraid. "I couldn't help but notice your wand..." Sara said, hoping that the stranger didn't mind being approached. "I... well..."

She held out her own wand, not needing to explain it any further. "My name is Sara Two-moons... I thought I'd at least seen most of the guardians, but your face eludes me..."

The blue wisp she carried stretched and strained in the direction of the other wisp, as if trying to get a good peek at it.

"I thought that's what it was!" Archie said excitedly, a childlike wonder lighting his eyes. He had never seen another one of these wands, despite having been told by his daughter that they came in all varieties of translucent fluff and even sprouted into babies after a time. "I'm Archie. Archie Saturn," he continued. "My daughter, Dixie, she's the guardian. I think he's... new," Archie said, whispering the last part so he wouldn't somehow offend his dancing wisp. "Dixie says you can feel life in them," he said, curiosity getting the better of him. Of course, he could see life in the child now, but back when it had been a wand, his efforts to care for it had seemed sort of misplaced.

The little brown wisp lifted toward the blue one as well, hampered by its tether to the bench.

Sara chuckled at the man's reaction, though she was suprised that the wand's true guardian would let it from their grasp. She assumed that this "Dixie" he had spoken of must not be yet an adult.

"You can..." she replied to his statement before taking a seat on the park bench, careful not to disturb the small brown wisp. She slipped Too-ya's wand beside it, and watched as the blue wisp moved eagerly forward, as if to make an introduction.

"Too-ya-la-kekt seems quite intruiged by each wisp he meets..." Sara explained, so Archie didn't have cause to worry. "He is very gentle."

Archie watched as the brown wisp bobbed cautiously toward Too-ya-la-kekt. Dixie was certainly fairly careless; not only did she let the wand out of her sight often, she had also failed to give it a name, as if unwilling to believe it would someday sprout into a child. From what Archie had heard, the wisp had never met another child the same size as it before. It seemed intrigued as well, but a bit shy. Certainly a first.

"Oh," Archie said. He hadn't been concerned, but it was nice to know the blue wisp was a nice one. "What are the other guardians like? If you don't mind me asking." He wondered what kind of person it took to be bonded to one of such a strange group of children.

The wisp was indeed shy. When he had met older children, all he had needed to do was float around and get poked and prodded. Meeting another wisp made him feel as though he needed to do something entertaining. He wavered in the breeze, unsure of what to do next.

Sara brushed an errand lock of black hair from a shoulder, then glanced up from the meeting of the two wisps to look into the man's face as she answered his question. "From what I've seen, the guardians seem as different as night and day. I myself am the last person I would have thought would be picked for such a responsibility... I was a hardcore unbeliever in anything mystic or supernatural. My views have changed..." she chuckled before she continued.

"We seem to be varying degrees of age... I myself am... well, older than your daughter." she laughed, cheeks reddening slightly. "I'm a linguist working at the southcentral native college. Apart from that... there really isn't anything interesting about me."

Archie thought everyone on Gaia was interesting. He didn't know what a linguist did, but he nodded anyway. "Dixie and I run a center for unwanted children." He found that people didn't find that as bizarre as telling them flat out that otherworldly criminals were being shoved into tiny bodies in lieu of prison.

"Dixie doesn't really believe in the supernatural either. Still, even after all this..." he said, gesturing at the wisps. She could be so hard-headed most of the time.

Sara blinked in disbelief. "Seems hard not to believe in it after all this..." The strange book, meeting the other guardians... watching the wand spring to life...

Her eyes wandered to the two wisps. Too-ya was slowly circling around the brown wisp, and Sara briefly worried that the two would become entangled. She figured he had more sense than to endanger himself, however, and let the two be. "Your job sounds interesting, though..." she said offhandedly, adding. "How old is your daughter?"

"Um... late teens?" he said, wincing slightly at the fact that he didn't really know her actual age. They had both grown up rather quickly in body, their level of reformation being the thing that aged them now. Dixie was older than he was, in actuality, but that didn't make her any more responsible. She had never cared for anything before, and seemed to lack any motherly instinct. It was fitting, considering that she had been a man. "I'm not really sure," he continued lamely.

The brown wisp perked at this new game, and held upright, spinning in place to see where the blue wisp was going next.

He wasn't a very good father... Sara Two-moons inwardly thought, and then inwardly shrugged. She supposed she wouldn't have made a great mother, if she'd had children. She decided to ignore his lack of knowledge, so as to be polite.

It was easy enough to be distracted by the wisps. They twirled about in a game that only a wisp could play, and it brought a smile to the native woman's face. Too-ya was growing more and more active with each and every day, growing into the strong little warrior that she knew he would become.

"I think they like each other..." she remarked.

"Yes." Archie smiled at the wisps. "Do you know what Too-ya-la-kekt is? I think mine's supposed to be a satyr. We looked it up," he said proudly, as if using Wikipedia was an advanced skill.

He was reminded again that the wisp was three months old and still nameless. He'd have to bring that up when they got home.

Sara nodded her head lightly. "I've been told that the artifact houses the spirit of an ancient thunderbird." She was familiar with the mythic figure of a satyr, and guessed that the brown wisp's guardians would have a hell of a time keeping track of the thing once it became a teenager and got some hormones... particularly if there were any nymph spirits about. She almost laughed to herself, but decided to explain the thunderbird, on the off-chance that the man had never heard of it before.

"I'd always grown up assuming that the tales my Grandfather told me of the mighty thuderbirds were nothing more than native american myth..." she smiled, reminiscing the stories for a brief moment before speaking. "Giant birds that brought the rains with them... they nourished the lands, and culled the herds... kept everything in balance."

Very interesting. Goat kids and balancing birds. Archie might have wondered why all of them were being given second chances, but he didn't. Such thoughts were too big for his brain. "That sounds... cool," Archie said. He had never known any myths before he came to Gaia, but the sheer number of them here seemed to make up for any lack he had previously experienced.

Moments later, the conversational lull was rudely interrupted by a muted buzzing, during which Archie almost jumped about nine feet in the air. He sprang to his feet, searching for the source of the vibrations. "Oh... um..." he muttered, reaching into the pocket of his pants and pulling out a cheap cellular phone, one of the many recent purchases Dixie had required of him. "Sorry," Archie said, flipping it open.

Sara startled as the man jumped up, then settled down somewhat as he tore a cellphone out of his pocket. Sara smiled in his direction, as if to say that no apology was needed, and then sat quietly, watching him on the phone.

"Yes... well... out," he said, rolling his eyes and running his fingers through his two-toned hair. "Yes, I have the stick. No. What? Okay." Archie snapped the phone closed, as close to slamming it as he could manage on something so small. He turned back to Sara, frown slowly melting into a smile.

"I'm sorry, we have to go," he said quietly. "Um, do you guys have a phone?" Of course, they probably did. Now he was just coming across as creepy. "I mean, for them," he said, indicating the wisps. "They seem to get along, is all."

Sara nodded in response, not really thinking anything of his request for her phone number. She reached into her purse, took out a gum wrapper and a pen, and scrawled her number on the wrapper.

"Call me anytime." she said, handing him the bit of silver foil. "It was nice meeting you."

"You too," Archie said, glad that she didn't seem put off. He found a scrap of his own paper in one pocket and a stubby mini golf pencil in another and printed his own number as neatly as he could. Home number, not this stupid cell phone, thank you very much.

He picked up the startled wand and wisp and hurried away back to the bus and his house.

(August 20, 2006, over AIM)

A Place called GAIA?

Sara Two-moons clutched Too-ya-la-kakt's wand close to her body as she hurried down the empty street, dodging rain. She moved with purpose today, a knot of nervousness and excitement dancing deep within her belly. She had awoken that morning to an odd sound, that had quickly become joyous: a light coo, like that of a baby.

At first the woman had assumed that she was going off the deep end. No one had prepared her for Too-ya's latest development! For some time she had noticed that his misted form seemed to be growing larger, and more substantial, day by day -- but until this morning, she hadn't been certain of it.

And now she was in a rush to the headquarters, just to verify what she already knew. The journey was quick, as her heart was light. Soon she had stepped through the doors, nearly rushing in...

Kishi had been chasing Kit around near the portal when it activated and a slighty damp smelling women entered the headquarters. Looking up Kishi grinned, she recognised this woman, while her name and the occasion of their meeting alluded her at the moment she knew that this person was familiar in some fashion.

"Hi , I know you." She stated. All thoughts of chasing kit were put out of her mind when there was people to talk to. People who if she remembered right had another like her.

Sara nearly tripped over the small child. The girl had a sense of familiarity about her, and it took the woman a few seconds to realize who the girl was. The features were unmistakable... but she had grown! Recognition flooded the woman, and she smiled pleasantly, recalling her first meeting.

"Hello there, Kishi..." Sara replied, ducking down to the girl's level. "I remember you, too. And I've brought Too-ya-la-kekt... I wonder if you remember him as well?"

There was a soft laugh in Sara's head, and it took the woman a moment to realize that was the only place the laugh was. She chuckled herself, and held the wand forward, motioning with her head toward the blue ghost.

For remembering who she was Sarah received a sweet smile from Kishi. her attention however was quickly diverted to her blue friend who had grown " Too ya is bigger now too. Almost a baby and then we can play" Kishi had played with baby ghosts before but most of them seemed reluctant to do much more than float around.

Malen who'd been in the gardens caught the tail end of Kishi's sentence walked down the hall untill he could see the small group " Hello there Sarah long time no see" He welcomed the fellow guardian " I see you've got to baby ghost stage, do you feel crazy yet?"

Sara glance upward, grinning slightly at the mention of the word crazy. "I feel absolutely looney..." she laughed. "Too-ya-la-kekt has been babbling nonstop inside my head all day."

She paused for a moment, and then added hurriedly. "PLEASE tell me that is normal?" The woman trusted that it was, and was growing to be more at-ease with her position as a guardian, and the strange circumstances around it. Some part of her still worried, however.

Too-ya stretched forward, the blue ghost drifting into Kishi's face, as if to look her right in the eyes. Inside Sara's mind, he laughed, and made a strange gibbering sound.

Malen nodded and laughed " It's the best and worst part of raising these kids, you're the most connected to them you will ever be but at the same time you're the only one who can hear them." It wasn't easy to have a babyghost but it was the time when you bonded most with your child.

Kishi encouraged by TooYa's willingess to get close to her stuck her tounge out at him and blew a raspberry just to see what he'd do.

Malen seeing this rolled his eyes " Television is evil and teaches my children bad things."

Sara laughed at the unexpected gesture from the girl, and at the following sound that echoed inside her head -- like Too-ya was blowing a raspberry, but many times over, one after another after another. She laughed harder. It absolutely tickled her...

She realized that she must look like an idiot, but somehow she couldn't control herself. "Television... HAhaha... will do... haha... do.. ha.. tha-hahahaha!" She fell down onto her butt, clutching her belly as she laughed. The more she thought about how she must look, the harder she started laughing.

Malen just shook his head only able to the begin imagining what was going on in Sarah's mind. He was sure Too-ya probably had an interesting response to Kishi's gesture. " You ok down there?" he asked.

Kishi was amused by this and walked over to Sarah pausing alogn the way to retrive her wand , she cautiously poked the laughing woman wondering if the fit was contagious.

Sara tried to quell the outburst of laughter, but was fighting a losing battle. When the girl poked her experimentally, she exploded in another burst, tears forming at her eyes. Her ribs were hurting... she wasn't sure if she loved or hated having a spell like this, but it certainly was exhausting!

Even Too-ya seemed to look on as the woman laughed. He floated forward, perhaps mimicking Kishi, and nudged Sara with the top of his head.

She looked up helplessly to Malen, but the patient look on his face just made her laugh harder. It was some time before she started to calm down... it felt good to get it all out - her emotions must have been pent up for a while now.

Once Sarah was calm again Malen offerd her a hand to help her up " I apoligise for that, Kishi can be rather exuberant at times." He doubted Kishi was wholly responsible for the outburst but she'd been the catalyst to be sure.

Kishi who didn't understand how a single raspberry has been that funny just shrugged before pokign at Too- Ya with her wand " Come here" she ordered, having decided he was a much more sensible playmate than his guardian.

Too-ya, having no real form, didn't seem to mind being poked with the wand, and instead seemed intruigued with the attention. He floated after Kishi, babbling slowly in Sara's head.

Sara accepted the help up, taking Malen's hand to boost herself from the floor. She stood, brushing off her hind end, and watched the two young ones together.

Malen smiled " Kishi has a fondness for the non corporeal of her breathren for some reason. possible becuase they can rarely retaliate if she annoys them." He looked at Sara for a moment " Would you like some tea?" he offered.

Kishi prodded the blue ghost a final time" You're it it's your turn to tag me" she announced racing about and weaving in and out of the adults, aware that he could only travel so far away from his wand.

Sara smiled softly. "Tea would be lovely... perhaps it would calm my nerves... I certainly don't mind this new devlopment, but it has been an adjustment..."

The blue ghost didn't seem to understand the word tag, but floated along after Kishi, recognizing play when he saw it. Sara watched the girl run, and felt a soft spot in her heart that yearned to see Too-ya do the same. "She certainly is energetic..."

" Likes an energizer battery in toddler form" Malen replied walking around the counter and into the kitchen, he was forever thankfull for the set up of the headqueaters, it was so open that he could see all the lobby from anywhere. He grabbed the kettle and filled it with water then put it on the stove, it was slower to boil water that way but he felt it tasted better. " Any particular type you like?"

Kishi wondering how agile her large puffy friend was turned unsteadily on her heel trying to double back. Unfortunately she herself wasn't quite that agile and she tumbled a short way to the floor.

"Earl gray..." Sara said, naming the only type of tea she knew. As a child, her Grandfather had made her herbal tinctures that tasted horrible, but she doubted that Malen had any "Pain Tea" or "Fever Tea".

As he moved about the kitchen, she continued to watch Kishi and Too-ya. When the girl tripped, Sara jumped herself, and realized that it would be doubly as frightening to see Too-ya fall one day. Her face looked stunned. It hit her hard that she was going to be a mother... that she perhaps already was. She smiled a bit, feeling frightened and anxious, as well as pleased.

Malen nodded " Hurrah for someone who actually knows different tea's I swear I ask people that questions and they look at me as if wondering what other types of tea are drunk other than the typical orange pekoe or the occasional green." Malen was no tea expert but he could name atleast half a dozens different types and occasions on why you'd choose them over another.

He watched Sara and understanding her thoughts smiled reasurringly at her " Don't worry even normal children are made of tough stuff, these kids are that much stronger , I'm sure whatever scrapes Too-ya gets into he can recover from.

Sara blushed a bit, at the tea-praise, knowing she was undeserving, but didn't mention that for now. Malen was so hospitable and understanding, that she didn't want to dissapoint him.

"I'm so anxious to see him..." she said, stopping when she realized what she had said. "I mean... I see him now, but... I can't wait to touch him, I suppose."

The ghost drifted over to Kishi, seeming concerned. Too-ya poked at her experimentally, making a soft noise in Sara's head. "She certainly is growing fast..."

" I know how you feel, I used to sing to Kishi as a wand waitng patiently for her to be a baby I could truly hold and care for. It's not easy to wait but it's better than being pregnant for 9 months or so my female friends say." Malen really had no desire to experience pregnency and was quite glad the process of getting Kishi has been painless.

Kishi shivered at the strange feeling she got when Too- ya touched her . She streatched her wings out and blew air at him " you're funny Too-ya."

Too-ya-la-kekt rippled like water as the gust of air from Kishi's mouth blew over him. He floated upwards, doing a single barrel roll before her.

"He's a showoff." Sara noted. "He likes to do that... rolling thing." She smirked, and wondered if he would be an athletic child briefly, before her attention turned to Kishi's wings. "You know... I can't get over the fact that Too-ya-la-kekt may very well have wings. How DO you deal with those? I mean, clothes? Don't they get in the way?"

Kishi giggled at the sight of the rolling ghost, he was defenitely amusing. "Again" She commanded whishing she was still able to do things like that. Hopefully soon she'd be able to fly again.

Malen grinned " On earth wings would be a problem, on gaia so many children have them there's clothes specialy manufactures to suit different wing types and sizes. Of course the big problem is going to be when they get to be flying age , thier wings are going to cuase them huge back problems."

Sara furrowed her eyebrows. "Gaia?"

The word was familiar. The name of a goddess, no? It had been used as the name for the Earth, or for mother nature. A confused look crossed her face. "On earth?"

She felt strange. Overwhelmed, somehow. Was she dreaming? This was how she'd felt when she first was chosen to guard Too-ya's wand. She didn't like this feeling.

Malen eyed Sara with worry, losing track of yourself was a bad thing but forgetting what planet you were on was worse. " Are you ok? "

Sara shook her head, and then nodded, bringing a hand to her forehead. "I don't know."

Too-ya-la-kekt continued to play, oblivious to his guardian's distress.

It made sense to Sara Two-moons, this mention of another place. Surely, it must be another place entirely? "Can you tell me what place this is, again?"

"Gaia" Malen said gently " You must, you must have not come through a normal way or even one you were aware of thier are portals between Earth and gaia that allow travel. you must have somehow stepped through one on your way to the wandshop the first time and stepped back when you went home. " This was disconcertng and he'd need to talk to Ianna about it later, he didn't know if the chidlren were meant to be raised off gaia this time around but it as forher or matilda to decide.

Somehow he spoke exactly what she knew somehow. Sara nodded, letting the words and the truth of them sink in. "I suppose... you know, I've seen so many strange things, I..."

She laughed, a half nervous and half relieved laugh. "This is a very different place from Earth."

Malen nodded " Gaia is thehome of everything you read about in myths and fairy tales and then some." At least Sara appeared to be taking this news well.. " Well if nothing else at least you know where to get clothes for your boy when he arrives."

Sara laughed again. Her days had been filled with so much that contradicted the nature of everything she had formerly knew to be true that if they told her the moon was made of green cheese she likely wouldn't have a hard time accepting it.

"I've... not explored the place. I've just gone from my home, to the shop, and back and forth between the two. It doesn't seem so different immediately..." she took a sip of her tea, remembering it suddely. It did something to calm her, and ease her mind and body.

Again Malen nodded " oh well when you get to exploring gaia it's a strange but fun place indeed, though if you're nervous about the idea you can always pop by here first and I can play tour guide. It'd give Too ya and Kishi another chance to play togeather since they seem to get along so well."

Sara smiled at the kind offer. "Thank you, Malen... I truly appreciate it. And Too-ya enjoys Kishi as well. Hopefully soon he will grow into a state where they can really start having fun together."

She chuckled, and then set down the empty teacup on the counter. "I suppose I'd best be getting back to E--" She paused, realizing how ridiculous it sounded. "I'd better be getting home. I've a lecture to give in three hours."

She stepped out of the kitchen and over to the floating blue ghost, retrieving his wand. "Come on, Too-ya, Mom has things to do, but we'll come back again soon." Sara winked at Kishi, then waved in both her direction and in Malen's.

Parent and child returned the wave and smiled at the pair who was leaving . "Come again soon" Malen said smiling.

(Finished September 8, 2006, over AIM)

The past few weeks have been absolutely overwhelming. Things have been hectic at work - its been hard to hide Too-ya-la-kekt from those that wouldn't understand him, and with college classes starting back up, I've been scrambling to organize my schedule and syllabus. More students have siged up for Native American Langue Study than in any year past - and while it does my heart good to see such an interest in the culture of my people, it has been a busy addition to my already busy life.

I've spent more time with the other guardians than I have in any time up to this point. I'm growing more at east around them, and I think it has done Too-ya-la-kekt a world of good to be around other wisps, ghosts and children. He has really opened up to them, so I will continue to arrange these playdates. It really does seem to make a difference in his general mood and level of activity, for reasons that I would guess are fairly easy to understand. I only wish I would have started doing this sooner.

He babbles in my head constantly now. A sweet voice, speaking gibberish that I don't understand. As a linguist, I began to try and trace patterns in the things which he would utter, but I honestly can't see rhyme nor reason. I think the sounds that he makes are closer to the babbling of an infant testing out its own voice, than any semblence of a language. Most of the time his voice sound calm and peaceful, though once in a while it seems almost curious, and one time this past week, when I accidently tripped over a chair and made a loud noise, it seemed frightened.

He is growing more and more like an infant, and I can sense that his time as a ghost will end soon. Every day, the blue outline of his figure seems to darken, and almost thicken, as if coming into a firmer existance. I shall need to clear out my study soon, and transform it into a nursery, lest the the poor child not have a place to stay. I can sense I don't have much time... the arrangements for a baby's coming are also making my life hectic right now.

But even moreso is the knowledge that on my short treks to the guardian's headquarters, I have been somehow stepping through a portal that leads from Earth to a world called Gaia. It has only been a few weeks since that discovery, and I am only recently beginning to accept it with any relative ease. The other guardians have been gracious hosts in this new world, and I have began to explore it further, encountering some of the strangest people...

I wonder if any of the other guardians are from Earth.

I feel absolutely insane even writing this. Like I'm a conspiracy theorist hanging out in Roswell on the fourth of July for their giant alien festival, wearing tinfoil and a googly eyed alien mask. I don't want to seem eccentric.

But then again, my life has become rather eccentric, hasn't it? It is all well and good. I've felt half-crazy ever since I came to posess this wand, but I am easing into it. Thats all a girl can do after all, isn't it?

I hope so.

Tomorrow I am going to set out and purchase a few things for Too-ya's nursery. A crib and changing table for sure, as well as blankets, pillows and linens, and a few items of clothing as well as stimulating toys. I am sort of nervous to buy clothes, even as certain I am that this child is a boy, what if I am wrong? I will be purchasing neutral colors... whites, blues, yellows, greens. Nothing pink. And nothing themed... I've always hated nurseries that were done up with circus animals, or rockets, or bunnies, or whatever. Just some babyish things, in soothing colors.

And maybe some classical music cds... I've heard that classical music is good for babies, that it helps their brains develop. Yes. I will get some classical music cds, and perhaps a native american wood flute cd as well, so he can have something of his and my culture.

There I go, saying "his" or "him" again. What a shock I will be in if this ends up being a girl.