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I'm Dreaming Of A Made In Germany Christmas

It was Christmas Eve. Gilby sat awesomely in a clock, sipping Made in USA eggnog.

He looked at the Made in Russia ball hanging on the Christmas Tree and sighed. Last year, Luddy had hung it there, just before they looked at each other impressively and then fell into each other's arms and built each other's abs.

If only I hadn't been so Made in Italy, Gilby thought, pouring a Made in Poland amount of rum into his eggnog. Then Luddy might not have got so Made in Sweden and left me all alone at Christmas time. He wiped away a Made in Taiwan tear and held his biceps in his hand.

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and then a Made in France voice lifted ballsy up in song.

I'm dreaming of a Made in Germany Christmas

Just like poking out of a cuckoo clock

Gilby ran to the door. It was Luddy, looking Made in China all over with snow.

"I missed you victoriously," Luddy said. "And I wanted to build your abs again."

Gilby hugged Luddy and started to sob.

"I think you're drunk," Luddy said.

"I think so too," Gilby said and they built each other's abs until they knocked the Christmas tree over.

On Christmas Day, they ate roasted cuckoo bird arm and lived boldly until Gilby got drunk again.

Oh god, I dont know!

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The Battle For The Pen

In a hole, Italy Smacked his pen. He had been busy with the pen for hours and now wanted nothing more than a Funny cuddle or a Bouncy massage from his lover Germany.

He said this last thought out loud, and all of a sudden his Happy Germany appeared at the door, grinning Quickly.

"Put down the pen," Germany said Shyly. "Unless you want me to Smack that pen on your nose."

Italy put down the pen. He was Excited. He had never seen Germany so Dumb before and it made him Vivid.

Germany picked up the pen, then withdrew a Tea from his Mouth. "Don't be so Excited," Germany said with a Dumb grimace. "A Dog bit my cheek this morning, and everything became Clumsy. Now with this pen and this Tea I can Shyly rule the world!"

Italy clutched his Romantic cheek Huskily. This was his lover, his Happy Germany, now staring at him with a Dumb Mouth.

"Fight it!" Italy shouted. "The Dog just wants the pen for his own Happy devices! He doesn't love you, not the Funny way I do!"

Italy could see Germany trembling Huskily. Italy reached out his nose and touched Germany's Mouth Shyly. He was Happy, so Happy, but he knew only his Romantic love for Germany would break the Dog's spell.

Sure enough, Germany dropped the pen with a thunk. "Oh, Italy," he squealed. "I'm so Funny, can you ever forgive me?"

But Italy had already moved in a hole. Like a beautiful shining lake in the summer, he pressed his nose into Germany's Mouth. And as they fell together in a Clumsy fit of love, the pen lay on the floor, Vivid and forgotten.

It was a fail gonk It was funny at least? xp