I didn't read that answer as detention. I read it more like "community service" that the college "offers" as an alternative to being handed over to the cops. I would possible rename it, since calling it detention is very misleading - no sitting in classrooms for punishment here.
I agree with Coda about the name, moreso that for me, it ganks me out of the profile like I've hit the fourth wall. It basically gives me the impression that he's the lovechild of Huckleberry Finn and Cruella DeVille. Which he's clearly not from the personality, but the name alone had me REEEEAAAALLY not wanting to come touch this app. I am pleasantly surprised with most of it, but be aware that others may judge/avoid based on the name, too. (Name doesn't feature at all into the stamping/approval process. Change not needed, just me writing up impressions as I go.)
I love his hobbies, they made me LOL. Just one issue - if he clearly doesn't take Debate Team seriously and rarely ever shows up... why would they take him to competition? I would think they would have him as the last possible alternate and hope to never have to use him. Because it sounds like he would make them lose every time, given his bias and how lightly he takes it.
I really want to know why Finn is okay with being the fall guy. Is this because of his need for attention? And if that's all it is, why isn't he okay taking the rap for things he didn't do, as long as it got him more attention?
Flaws are looking great.
Love the rapier effect <3 Awesome.
I like that you've based Petros off Huck's personality, just more mature and with a few slightly changes in there. I can see how they'd fit together.
Petros, I can see fitting the whole Canyon theme. But Huck I felt came off as a bit too flighty? I didn't get that "entrenched" or "stay the course" feeling from him that you say is there :S Possibly there's too much emphasis in how unreliable and unserious he is for that impression to come across?
On the plus side, I do like the way Aeneas and Hector would work together. It sounds like a very interesting combo (and possibly lots of trouble for the Parallel Cavaliers).
So yeah, just a few niggling things preventing approval at the moment.
Reply
