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Elzo wanted to say his dad already had a girl picked out for him. Three in fact, should Elzo manage to chase the first two away. Thankfully, arranged marriages were illegal in the states. Thank god. Rolling his head to the side, he gave her a smile. "Trust me, the fact has been noted." Getting off the wall, Elzo's head cocked as he noticed a few open drawers in the desk. He was just going to look. That was all. Look.

"Any advice on how I could make it up? I know sorry won't cut it, and giving gifts will be usually seen as trying to buy into good graces. So...No idea what to do. As for your Mr. Right-" Collins had way to many red pens. Probably so he could give everyone a failing grade and write nasty remarks on their slow running.
"You still call him Mr. Right. That's got to mean something." Collins also had a packet of gum. Confiscated most likely. Also not likely to be missed. Slipping the packet of gum into his pocket Elzo made a face. "You look a bit pissed. Did I say something wrong or...?" Who knew what was going on in a girl's mind. He sure didn't.

Elzo's fingers played with the pocketed gum. Maybe it was poisoned. Ah well, thinking about poisoned gum was better then thinking about how he might have pissed her off. Which he didn't. Small miracle.
"Every girl wants a romeo and every guy wants a Juliet. But really, the two mainly hooked up to escape planed marriages and to rebel against their families. Romeo was a flighty dumbass and Juliet was the time period's equivalent to a slut. So, you can soap box all you want babe, because I might just stand next to you for it."

A few time's he'd pondered the parallels of His relationship with Lina to that of the star crossed lovers. However, Elzo liked to think neither of them were as stupid as the infamous couple. That and poison and dagger suicide wouldn't be an option, more like Astraea and General king hunting them down and ripping them apart.

At the mention of his needs, eyes went to Audrey's frame, and a small grin slipped onto his lips unnoticed. That is before he realized that she was talking to him and he needed to answer.
"Well, first off, not just any girl can handle me and my needs. Don't look at me like that, it's true." He crossed his arms. "Most girls think that we can get out rocks off where ever, but really, we do have tastes. I mean, I can't just bang some girl from the red zone. She's got to be attractive and have a nice-" He had begun to hold up his hand like they were cupping something. Arms swung back to his sides. "Personality."

"While it may sound cheesy, all girls are special. Like, you for instance, you're special. Just for a different reason then say, my friend over at Crystal,(real friend, I assure you). Really, they are, but she's just more special to me then others. I dunno. She's just so, different then everyone else? Not in a bad way. She just strikes me? I don't know how to describe it."

A tiny pink could be detected in Elzo's cheeks. "I mean...I was thinking about flowers but, I'm worried she'd take it the wrong way. What would make you feel special and such? Uh, that is... sorry, that came out wrong."
Pink was now a light red.

Well, at least she wasn't some nut that got offended. "Language of flowers huh?" Roses he knew were supposed to be romantic, but they always smelt gross to him. He also never got the appeal of a flower that would cut you. Orchids, now those were amazing. But expensive. And fragile. Maybe not the best choice. "Last time I tried to make anything I caught the table on fire. Don't ask me how, because I don't even know how I did it. So..homemade is out, unless she like burn scars. Not many do." Leaning on the desk, Elzo went over some options. "...What do daisies say?"

It was now a bit confusing. Did he give her a bunch of flowers that meant 'I want to bone you?' or 'I like you?' God. Girls and flowers. he'd never understood either languages. Well, he's never even known flowers had a language. Girl talk was just foreign. Her last comment drew out the part of him he'd been trying his hardest to repress. "Well, I certainly know one thing I can give a girl that no other can." Oops. Lewd comments at inappropriate times. He made them.

The red had returned to his face. "Sorry. Wasn't thinking."

Well herp de derp. At least he hadn't pick the 'let's ********' flower. But he might give one of those to another girl. Or a few. Just to mess with them. That and a flower that represented ******** was kind of an awesome thing. 'Hey is a flower, let's do it'. Not romantic but hey, what was these days?
As Audrey came closer, Elzo's mind debated about the situation. One, here was a girl, a nice girl. She was playing along and taking his lewd comments with a good light heart. Two, they were in a locked room, with a desk was just at waist level. Three, no one had seen Mr. Collins is a while. Four, she may not seem the type to have two and three affect her but they sure affected him. Five, to hell with it.

As red faded from his face, Elzo snaked an arm around the petite girl. the other hand went to cup her face. It was something out of a bad romance novel. "My, my Miss Collins. To pry at a man's most deepest and darkest of secrets... Very dangerous. Sure you're not a relative to Mr. Collins?" Pulling her far to close be to considered comfortable he continued. "After all, this is Hillworth you know. Some secrets are more dangerous then others. Far more dangerous. Best to keep them to myself any only share when I know it can be..properly handled." His face broke out into a wide, goofy grin, ruining any danger aspect. The hands snaked back to his side, awaiting a response, good or bad.

Damn.

Like, really.
Dayum.
This girl was officially awesome. She had reached a new level on the awesome-odometer. Laughing, Elzo felt some of the stress of the day vanish. It was just a bit uplifting, being able to joke around like that. "Shame? You don't even know how shameful I can be." His tone did not match his meaning or his words. Elzo had the magical ability of making it seem lewd when it was so far from it. If it was magic or just his thing, who could say? Grabbing a pen and the sticky note stack from Collins's desk, he moved.

Cutting her off at the door, a shark-like smile crept onto Elzo's face. He let it linger for a moment before unlocking the door, opening it, and offering her her escape. The smile wasn't shark-like anymore, just his goofy one. "Any guy that tries to slander you will face me, or more specifically, my fist. Before you go however-" He'd moved into the hall, unaware of eyes on him. "Here is my number, call me any time. ANY time."

When Elzo did noticed the bunch of guys staring at him and the newly emerging Audrey he smiled. "Looks like some introductions to my fist might come sooner then later it seems. Catch you sometime for coffee?" He looked sincere in his request. But, he also looked perverted. He could pull them off at the same time.

He was Elzo Xanis after all.