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I didn't meant "yeah it's gonna hurt everyone" but there are times when yeah, it can hurt. My body is very sensitive, so yeah, it's going to hurt me. It does stretch mine out for the time being, it is a little smaller and my fiance's p***s isn't all that small. I don't have sex very often, so it does hurt a little while after and it's very tender for a little bit. It goes away within a couple hours though. Try picturing a watermelon going through a whole the size of a tennis ball. It does stretch back. That's why it hurts me.
You cannot tell someone it is a myth if they're going through it. If you're sensitive, it can. I know my body better than any one else and I KNOW that's why it hurts. I am lubricated enough, I know this. My body has enough of it's own and I use condoms and lubricant. It simply hurts because I don't have sex often enough for it not to be tender. I'm not the only one. It is not a myth that it can hurt. I'm not saying that's why she hurts, but that is why I hurt. I know many women, even one of the female doctors I was talking to has that problem. It is not a myth and it can happen. You can't go telling people it's a myth when it does happen.
I have seen a doctor, I know what my problems are, I am very aware of what my pain is and isn't. I'm not stupid, I have seen a doctor, in fact I've seen three and they all told me the same thing. One even told me that the things that say it's a myth are b******t. Sorry, but I am very aware of the reasons I hurt after sex and lubrication is NOT it for the last time. You had no idea how many times I had to go to the emergency room for a doctor to tell me it was normal to feel tender after sex even though it was well lubricated.

I don't know how else to explain it or get my point across. It is normal for some women to be tender after sex, not all, but some -it's NOT a complete myth, this I know. I have been to a doctor, I am aware of what my pain is and isn't, my body is just more sensitive than others and yeah, it's going to hurt me because of the size difference and how far apart I have sex. Like, two or three times every two months.

(I'm really not trying to be defensive or anything, but being told it's a myth and that I'm not sure what my pain is just really bugs me...I spent countless hours in the emerg and hospital trying to find out and one doctor finally goes "Oh, if you're naturally tight then it's going to be tender after you have sex, don't believe anyone who tells you it's a myth or that there's something wrong with you because there isn't. Every woman is different, you were just one of the not-so-lucky ones.")

I wasn't trying to apply to it, if you noticed, I posted in another one that it could be a bigger problem and that she should get it checked. Also, I edited my last post.
Also, if you'd stop telling me to get lubricant, I wouldn't get defensive about that. I'm sorry but I'm not having a good day (I don't think any one wants to hear about it, it's kind of gross). It can and does happen. That's something that does happen. I'm not applying my situation to anyone else's anymore.

What I am saying is that it is not a myth and does happen to some women whether you believe it or not. It doesn't affect you, so you're not going to believe it. It does affect me. It is tender because my v****a is small and naturally really right even when I have just had sex. My fiance is fairly big. It does make it tender. I was told by a doctor that this is normal and there's nothing I can do about it and that it does happen to other women too. It's just really starting to upset me that you're telling me it's a myth and that it's not "supposed to happen" when I know that it is normal anyway. I am positive of this. It does stretch and it does stretch back, but the stretching is not always pleasant. The stretching part can make it tender.

Again, not for all women, but for some women this is true.
This is really starting to upset me that you're not seeing my point, I fought with the doctors since may one this and I finally got the answer I needed and you're telling me it's bullshit. sad
I do NOT need to find a new doctor, I have had a couple tell me this. Whenever I have sex regularly it does not hurt. But when it's as far as two months apart, it hurts like hell and that is normal because I don't masturbate or anything in the time he's gone. There is nothing stretching it at all for two months.
This is just really starting to upset me because I know this is right an I know this happens to some women. It just does and telling us it doesn't isn't going to make it untrue.

I'm going to explain this one more time.
When I have sex with him the first time in two months, it hurts like hell because of the stretching.
It hurts for a couple hours.
After that I am fine if I keep having sex regularily until he leaves again.
Then once he comes back it's painful the first time we have sex again.
I was told by several doctors that this is normal and I am talking to a public health nurse right now (she's my aunt's friend) and she says it's normal for it to happen. Maybe it's not supposed to, but it is normal.
That's it, I'm done. It's just a shame that you can't see that it is normal for some women.
If I can find an article I will show you if you want. I just can't keep this going when I know that part of my problem is okay and normal for me and you're telling me it's not.

All I said is that lubrication is the issue for most women and that it never hurts to try it even if you think you're well lubricated. And I said it once. But every since you've freaked out whenever I mentioned lubrication. I'm not pushing it on you, and I am not saying it's your problem. I am just saying it is the problem for most women. You are going to have to realize that you are not necessarily "most women" and that not everything applies to you.


I am not saying you don't experience pain. And I am not saying that your pain is avoidable or freaky. I am just saying that your initial post made it sound like pain is a normal and unavoidable part of sex. And since that is not the case, I wanted to clear that up.

A normal and healthy v****a stretches when a woman gets in the mood. She should be in the mood before attempting to put anything in her v****a. You do not need to have sex often or masturbate to keep your v****a limber or any such nonsense. I'm sorry, but that isn't the way it works with a normal v****a. Like I said, I don't know what gynecological issue you have. So your experiences may be perfectly normal for you. But they are not normal for the average woman.



That is something I will agree with. If a woman has an STD, a tipped uterus, or any number of other issues, it would not be unusual for her to experience pain.


Most vaginas will snap right back into place, so stretching exercises wouldn't be effective (unless she wanted a huge gaping v****a and tried to stretch it out with something the size of a baby xp ).

However, some women have a condition called vaginismus. It's basically where their v****a tightens up. It's common among rape victims, women who have always been told that sex has to hurt, women who had very religious parents and were taught that sex is wrong, women who had a health issue that made sex hurt for a while, etc. The women anticipate pain and tighten up as a result. That makes sex hurt for them, when if they had just relaxed, they could have had pain-free sex. For those women, vaginal inserts may be used. The inserts slowly get them used to the feeling of having something inside of them.

Like I said, I don't know what you might have. I'm not saying you have vaginismus. I'm just saying that some women do. But if that kind of sounds like you or you're not sure whether you have it or not, I'd recommend looking into it or specifically asking a doctor about it. Because most women are able to completely get over it with therapy, the inserts, or even just support groups, forums, and step by step instructions they can follow at home.

If you want to read more about it, check out: http://www.vaginismus.com/vaginismus-causes

There are also exercises that women can do (it's sort of like holding in pee) that can help. Having more control over those muscles can make it easier to relax them willingly. And strengthening them can mean better orgasms and easier childbirth. I believe this site goes into that: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/kegel-exercises/WO00119

Drinking lots of water can help some women too because it promotes lubrication and helps the v****a stay nice and stretchy.


To sum up, I'm not saying you're stupid. I'm not saying you're a freak. I'm not saying it's all in your head. I'm not saying it's because you're too dry. I'm not saying you have vaginismus. I'm not saying all you need to do is drink more water and relax. And I'm not saying the pain you're feeling isn't normal for you. I just wanted to make it clear that pain is not normal for most women. We have a lot of young girls in these sex ed guilds who honestly believe that sex is always painful and bloody and that there is nothing they can do to change that. And it's really a shame when girls have awful experiences with sex when they were perfectly capable of enjoying themselves. So I really like to make it clear that most women don't have to go through that.

My aunt was a nurse. She had less college under her belt than I do. So you can't get overly impressed with titles. They don't always mean what you think.


I am aware that all women are different. That is why I told you not to tell people that sex will hurt, remember that? And that is why I said that your pain might be normal for you, but it is not something that most women have to deal with.


Are you serious? You have only been to three doctors over this and only one of them was even a gynecologist? General doctors and emergency room doctors are great. They're smart people. But if you have a vaginal issue, you should be seeing gynecologists. Because they're the ones who specialize specifically in women's issues.


I don't just have links. I've been to doctors too. I have seen four different gynecologists. I'm very interested in reproductive health and dispelling myths, so I try to communicate with doctors about these issues as much as possible.


You said in another thread that your reproductive tract was covered with sores that made sex painful for you. That is why I said I didn't know what gynecological issue you had. Remember this thread? http://www.gaiaonline.com/guilds/viewtopic.php?t=18243105 Are you now saying that was a lie? That you do not have any gynecological issues, STDs, or sores?


Please do. I keep specifying that what you are feeling may be normal for you, but that it isn't what most women go through. And you act like I am calling you an absolute freak of nature. I'm not sure if I am not being clear, if English is your second language, if you have reading comprehension issues, or something else. But maybe your doctor can explain things to you better than I.


"A lot of women" is not the same as "most women." Most women don't have to experience pain. That is, and always has been, my point.

Uh yeah, I did. Here are some quotes from my previous posts:

"If you have a gynecological issue that is making it hurt, that is one thing. But most women do not. So do not try to apply your situation to everyone else's."

"I am not saying that your pain is avoidable or freaky."

"So your experiences may be perfectly normal for you."

"If a woman has an STD, a tipped uterus, or any number of other issues, it would not be unusual for her to experience pain."

"And I'm not saying the pain you're feeling isn't normal for you."

I'd recommend going back and reading my posts again. You might be surprised at how much you're misunderstanding. So when you see your doctor, make sure you print this whole thing out. Don't try to just sum up what I said because you apparently do have reading comprehension issues.