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Posted: Wed Dec 02, 2009 3:56 pm
Bringing the thread back upward.
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Posted: Sun Dec 06, 2009 10:35 am
Up you guys go! ::pushes upward::
As I might be inclined to enter her in the concept contest, I'd like to see if there is more critique before I try to enter it.
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Posted: Wed Dec 09, 2009 10:33 pm
Things that go BUMP in the night include Lemon.
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Posted: Mon Dec 21, 2009 12:39 am
You've come a long way! I really like her ability. I have a couple questions about it, though.
Details: How much information will her ability display? Will it give her the name of the Negaverser/Senshi, their weapon/main element/sphere? How much energy, how wounded they are, etc etc?
The sphere: The globe has the properties of glass: how thick of glass? 1/8th of an inch or 3-5mm is the standard thickness of window glass.
A senshi, when powered-up, can move into the sphere's space: Can they see the information on the sphere?
I personally think that the sphere's ability to give Helin information is okay, though since it's a starting attack... Perhaps reduce the radius to 30 feet at first, then at super upgrade it to 50 feet? I also think that there should be information about the environment that displays up to three things, and with the Negaverse/Senshi... I'd like to know what sort of information is displayed. I think her ability has too much for a starting attack, though it is on the right track!
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Posted: Mon Dec 21, 2009 3:20 am
On the informational aspect of people, her information on the people will only display: A picture (if she has met them before, only when they show themselves fully will it actually be placed in the 'database' ), the name (not sure if it will include rank, maybe only on Senshi/Nega? So, if she ran into, say, Zue, Beryl, or Kunzite, she would only be able to identify statuses as Guardian Cat, Queen or Cavalier by their looks when they show up), and their weapon/sphere and attack(s) (only on Senshi/Nega, again). That is the only information given in both upgrades. Also, before she meets a powered-up senshi within sight range for the first time, she only knows as much as a Guardian cat would on an unawakened: name, sphere and attack name. Helin, however, cannot see the information of an unawakened or powered-down Senshi in any form.
The sphere's 'glass' is very thin. Not mica-thin, luckily, but it can be easily broken, so probably the strength of a flat screen panel in today's terms? Also, if the sphere is cracked, the area around the cracks is going to be ruined, making information (that powered-up Senshi in that dome can see, except the information on themselves will be replaced with that of Helin) around the cracks as useful as they would be on an LCD screen: useless.
Reducing the space she can retrieve others' information sounds good to me, since I was actively trying to reduce an OP potential. I'm not sure, then, what I will do for the upgrade at this point, though: her Super was going to allow an attack function.
Maybe, if we can use an Eternal attack as an upgrade on the Super, here's an idea:
Starter = starter, with the modifications above. Super = starter + lock-on mode? Lock-on mode would be, if she taps the information on someone while saying the attack's upgrade name, a small pale/neon (fuku color here) aura shows up around the someone whose information is being tapped. It's under the same flaw as the sphere: when the sphere breaks, forget it. Also fades after 6 posts of total affliction? Not only is the aura obvious to Helin, it is obvious to anyone around them, whether they are human, Negaverse, whatever. Only one person can be targeted at a time, it also loses one post every time the lock-on call is to be used to switch between characters after being first used in a battle.
Example: Helin uses the lock-on function on Whomeverite for two posts, recalling the attack again and locking on Sillyite for three posts. Since she switched the attack target once, she can't use the lock-on mode anymore for that battle. OOC posts will be used in a battle to signify a target change.
Eternal allows the locked-on targets to be beamed (though it'll never be at even half the amount of power Astraea has with her beams) when called. It's a straight-shot beam, though, and can only be used once a battle for each person being locked on, to 3 beams max.
After Starter, the range of powered-up presence goes up by another 10 feet, and then ten feet more in Super being upgraded. When Super is upgraded, more posts might be given in the lock-on? Not sure. I'll have to see.
I'll put a link to this post in update and questions.
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Posted: Mon Dec 21, 2009 6:48 pm
What does lock-on status do? Just make the person glow? Or is there more I'm missing? Does it give extra info as well? Allow her to track their movements better?
I think this is a very cool idea. Suits Esen very well, and is a very unique attack/power. For myself, I would want Rose to give the final yay/nay on whether it suits ITNOTM, but I am loving it.
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Posted: Tue Dec 22, 2009 12:08 am
Kalindara - Lock-on status makes the target much easier to see, and that's really about it that I'm thinking of for that stage. I could use it for tracking, but as the sphere's 'power person' search radius also grows with going from Starter to Super to Eternal (and maybe the sphere's damage resistance goes up along with it?), I'm thinking that Lock-on would be the Starter-Super upgrade. The Super-Eternal upgrade, however, THEN allows the lock-on status to be used for attacking, with beams. However, the beams she can send out will be pretty limited in power, and nowhere near that of Astraea's beams.
The Eternal upgrade's beams, in my thoughts, would be like this - it's a bit changed from the above, but now has a huge weakness with it: Either she can fire four straight-shot beams separately (maybe different colors with minor effects? Might not fly, but putting out there), use two in tandem, or use all four together; any combination of those four would be her limit. With the use of this attack, there's more limitations, however. When Helin uses the attack to send out these beams, the sphere weakens in damage resistance, going down to the resistance of her Starter Senshi's information sphere. Two beams would send the Eternal senshi resistance down to the Super resistance; two more (or using all four at once) makes the sphere as fragile as it was as a Starter.
If it wasn't made really obvious, her powers pretty much depend on the informational sphere that shows up in the Starter attack; thus, weakening the sphere's ability to withstand attack would screw her over.
And, since you have a Barren Pines non-Zodiac Senshi, I'd like to know if the memory wipe Kirin will experience post-plot would affect any other Barren Pine characters if they were in a situation similar?
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Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 12:22 am
Attack #1 (Helin Power, Make-UP!) NAME: Helin Global View! [What it does] Helin summons her Henshin Pen and a lightly iridescent/clear sphere forms around her (the size of it being her height all around). NOTICE: (tenative) FUTURE ATTACKS ARE DEPENDENT ON THIS SPHERE (sphere being globe, not power focus), so information given here still applies on future attacks unless noted.
ATTACK SUMMARY: 1. Summons a sphere and her pen The inside of the sphere has two portions set aside for specific functions: The Environment Window is able to assess the area surrounding Helin at a thirty-foot radius - if she was in the park, it would say she was in the park, and would tell up to three other aspects of the place (if any trees there could hold up Helin, if there was a fountain or picnic table, other important information that could be remotely useful in battle. This will be determined by battle location and which person/group is planned to win). This is updated in real-time. The Life-Form Window detects four of the closest powered life-forms (these include powered-up Negaverse Agents, powered-up Senshi, Guardian Cats, resurrected souls, powered-up Cavaliers and youma), and gives pictures after she has actually met them. More details are given for characters of some populations within 20 feet, though the information is limited to their attack/weapon information and power level/rank (Example link here when made). This has to be manually refreshed. The rest of the sphere area is used for notes. If Helin had been able to jump three stories high, that would be something she could note. Notes stay in the sphere area for up to 5 battles or until her sphere breaks, whichever is the shorter time period.
2. Helin's Henshin Pen (and only this) can be used to write on the sphere; the sphere is intangible to Senshi other than herself The inside of the sphere works much like a tablet computer, and the areas can be navigated, or written on, with Helin's Henshin Pen. Not even another Senshi's Henshin Pen will work on the screen; however, a Senshi, when powered-up, can move into the sphere's space... unfortunately, this includes the Corrupted Senshi, being that they are still Senshi. However, their information on the inner globe will be replaced with her own. To a Negaverse Agent, the sphere is impenetrable, but breakable. Any energy-based attacks that can be aimed at an object can hurt the globe.
3. Helin's sphere can rotate when needed. Helin is able to stand in place and turn herself toward the portion of the globe that she needs to see. When her foot hits the bottom portion of the globe, the globe will move in whichever direction she is moving.
4. If her sphere is destroyed, so is all the information in it. The sphere can only be summoned once a battle. Helin can create the information globe, but to remove the globe requires a power-down. This being said, the sphere is vulnerable to a Senshi's energy-based attack that can affect an object (So Tisiphone's Void's Rescind would work against the globe, but not so much Eris' Discordant Strike; any attacks using a Senshi's actual physical body, such as Walkure's Glorious Battle, are no-effect attacks as well, see #2) or any Negaverse Agent's attack. The globe has a different amount of resistance when fighting someone of various power levels (chart link here when made), and once the globe is destroyed, all information is lost. When the globe cracks, the information is not lost as long as it's not shattered, but that part of the globe will be useless for that battle.
Attack #1a (Helin Comet Power, Make-UP!) NAME: Helin Global View, Lock-On! [What it does] Using the Global View sphere (now with higher attack resistance and a 40 foot seeking range), Helin taps one of the beings that show on the sphere as she calls out the attack's name (or within three seconds after). Not very flashy-seeming... on Helin's part. It's useful, however, in that the tapped is caught in a rather (fuku-color, maybe neon or pastel?) visible aura. The tapped will know from the ring of light at their feet that follow them, and anyone else will see the aura around the tapped. That last part is the attack's usefulness: the Lock-On upgrade can be used to keep a character in high visibility for 6 posts worth of time for the tapped - a battle. Helin can place the Lock-On upgrade to a different person after its first use, but then it takes a post that would be otherwise kept on the tapped (if Helin switched her target twice, it could only be used for 4 posts total, since switching the lock-on takes a post). If the sphere breaks during usage of Lock-On, the aura disappears, since nothing is left to power it. When Helin goes Eternal, Lock-On gets another four posts of Lock-On usage per battle.
Usage example: Helin has 6 posts of Lock-On and traps Sillyite. Two posts from Sillyite later, she chooses to switch to Whomeverite. Whomeverite has only three posts of being Locked-On, since Helin used one post to switch her target.
Attack #2 (Helin Eternal Power, Make-UP!) ((OOC note: more of an Attack #1b)) NAME: Helin Global View, Lock-On (Beam/Beam Duo/Beam Quad)! [What it does] Using the Global View sphere (higher attack resistance, and seeking range now maxed out at 50 foot) and 'Lock-On' from the previous upgrade, Helin is now able to fire beams with the sphere (best used at a range of 30 foot or less). It will only work on a character that is Locked-On at the time of call. The reason for the different names involve the fact the four beams she can use are combinable to create beams of higher powers (Beam Quad has double the power of Beam Duo has double the power of Beam). In one battle, she can use one from the following: one Beam Quad, two Beam Duo, one Beam Duo and two Beam, or four Beam. Lock-On and Lock-On Beam (whatever) have to be used in different posts. However, these beams are rather straight-shooters. If the tapped can move out of the way quickly enough, it's a wasted beam, and since each time a beam is used, her sphere's attack resistance goes down, Helin cannot afford to have wasted beams. For every two beams she uses, her sphere's resistance reverts to the stage below the current resistance power. Every Beam Duo, she will go down one stage, and a Beam Quad weakens the sphere directly back to her Starter's resistance. It wouldn't be a bad tradeoff, until you realize that Helin's source of attack power is that sphere. Sure, she retains other Senshi abilities, but Helin's largest strength above the Negaverse is the information the sphere provides that she can use to strategize.
It's under the same flaw as the sphere: when the sphere breaks, forget it. Also fades after 6 posts of total affliction? Not only is the aura obvious to Helin, it is obvious to anyone around them, whether they are human, Negaverse, whatever. Only one person can be targeted at a time, it also loses one post every time the lock-on call is to be used to switch between characters after being first used in a battle.
Example: Helin uses the lock-on function on Whomeverite for two posts, recalling the attack again and locking on Sillyite for three posts. Since she switched the attack target once, she can't use the lock-on mode anymore for that battle. OOC posts will be used in a battle to signify a target change.
Shazari I suspect the Chance Wheel is fine (maybe assume it's magically bolted to the ground until it disappears), and the Henshin Pens doing double duty as part of someone's attack sequence would be as well -- but consider the henshin pen like a Harry Potter wand -- you don't want to go around hitting or stabbing people with it, because you don't want to break your wand.I'm not a voice of authority on the subject, of course, but that's my take. <3 Shazari's opinion on the matter of attack usage of the Henshin Pen.
Rewritten attack info and such, and I plan to add images to the description (well, a chart, but it's still an image!). Esen is now resurrected, and due to that, I will be focusing on this quest for the most part. I'm putting up for a MARKPLZ soon, but until then, I'm still open for critique. I would especially like to request that, when I start the MARKPLZ process, I need a look-over from Rose for overlap issues, though again, this is her only ability to work with as a Starter.
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Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 3:37 pm
Critique is still open, but MARKPLZ is now going into effect.
Again, would especially like an official ruling from Rose or Natsu on the aspect of Analysis' portrayal. Would also like to know if attacks should be based on the Medieval-and-earlier times of the spheres if rejected. I just didn't want to give Helin clairvoyance for her information-collection ability. x_x
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Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 8:56 pm
I like Esen and Analysis a lot. BUT I THINK that you need to straighten out the attacks??? Like. I would not read this crapload of information? If you need to put so many limits I think maybe it's way too powerful for a first-stage attack?? Also, maybe make it so like, first stage can tell you what their weapon/etc is, but no specific attacks or anything until stage two? Like, you could see "Sailor Virgo, Senshi of Innocence" stage #1, and Super Sailor Helin would be able to see "Sailor Virgo, Senshi of Innocence, Attack--Immaculate Reflection, absorbs opponent attacks" or somthing??
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Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 9:35 pm
Hmm. I do see your point. (I think in words, and they overload... I guess it would be a good idea for streamlining.)
I'll place the note in the 'Questions' post. I could definitely see the ideas here right now being killed for Death by Word-vomit, so it will be up there in the Questions post staring at me as I try to edit crud.
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 8:40 pm
New attacks. Would like critique on them! (Old attacks are still there in my second post, but Roma makes a good point about my over-wordiness, so unless you need to, I don't recommend reading it.) I need a good effect post amount for my first attack, by the way.
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Posted: Thu Feb 25, 2010 11:22 pm
Bumping this up, made a few new edits, hoping that I didn't under-power Helin's first attack.
(Think I should name a few examples of what the Eternal attack can be useful for other than the alternate functions?)
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