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Princess_Feylin Vice Captain
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 Posted: Thu Feb 11, 2010 6:00 pm
Letter Home /////Grandda,
/////I know I promised to write you about the people here and I keep putting it off. Here's the truth of it: people at Telgar, by and large, don't like me. This isn't just me being overly self-critical and reading too much into people's words and reactions. This is people being overtly cold and sometimes downright hostile. I didn't want to tell you, really, because I knew you'd only be angry and there's nothing you can do about it. I mean it. There's nothing you can do about it, so please don't try. I really can handle it. At least I think I can most days.
/////But you want to hear about them, as you've said. As if you don't trust me. I swear, sometimes I believe you think I'm making all the people up. You ask me the strangest questions. "What color is Y'kar's hair?" I mean, if you must know, it's dark brown, but what does it matter what color his hair is? I can't quite figure out if you're trying to catch me in a lie or if you're sifting through my references for signs that I'm taking a romantic interest in anyone so you can have great-grandchildren. Sorry to disappoint on both counts, but I'm not lying and you're not having and great-grandbabies any time soon.
/////I've told you all about Y'kar and A'li already (though not their hair colors, apparently). So maybe I should tell you about the other people I see on a daily basis. The weyrlingmaster, who oversees our training, doesn't seem to expect much from us. In a way it's insulting, but it's also a relief. You know I've never been particularly good at physical activities, and so it's not like I really disappoint him when I fail to run as long or as fast as he wants me to. Roseth and her sisters are all holding back for the time being, and we're all practicing outside of our lessons so that we can present them with an amazing improvement once we become senior weyrlings and they start considering us for wings. The man isn't impressed with us, but he doesn't heap abuses on us either.
/////Most of the people who work in the Lower Caverns are all right. The women, anyway. Some of them look at me oddly for having the audacity to Impress a man's dragon, but a lot of them have lost interest in the whole affair, having lives of their own and more important things to worry about. It's more the people who aged out after our clutch and the menfolk who resent me, it seems. I "stole" a man's dragon. I really wonder if any of them were actually watching at the hatching. Roseth bowled me over. There was no theft involved.
/////Anyway, I remain your loving granddaughter, and wish you the best. Take care not to catch a cough this winter. I hear the colds are going to be particularly nasty this year.
/////Jasrai
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Posted: Thu Feb 11, 2010 7:08 pm
Letter Home /////Mum and Da,
/////Not that you've ever seen her (I'll have to do something about that), but if you'd seen her on the day she hatched and then again today, you wouldn't recognize Roseth. Even since the last time I wrote you, which wasn't all that long ago, she's grown larger. Significantly so. She's entering adolescence, and like basically ever species on Pern her legs are too long and her wings are too large and she is not spectacularly coordinated at the moment, but she tries so hard to be, that sometimes her attempts at grace backfire. Nevertheless, she's a beautiful dragon. It's a shame so few people can appreciate her.
/////Our lessons continue to be a struggle, though mostly for me. Roseth, for all her adolescent gracelessness, knows instinctively what is expected of her and takes to it beautifully. I, on the other hand, remain fat and slow and generally a disgrace to the entire Weyr. Why didn't you make me play active games as a child, instead of letting me laze about playing imagination games and solving puzzles? I swear, there are days I would trade half my intellect for the ability to run a mile in less than eleven minutes. I'm not serious, of course, but in our class of three, I am the least fit and continue to be so.
/////Roseth, as I said, excels in our lessons. She is anxious to move on to further challenges, and I admit I agree with her. She's ready for more difficult things. More than just sustained glides and banking. I really feel she's ready for actual flight, though that could just be me being selfish - I want to fly! She and her clutchmates still work closely together. The Weyr professes its astonishment at how close this clutch is, even with the circumstances surrounding its hatching. I don't really know enough dragons to say whether it's odd or not, but it apparently is. I'm glad she has people to confide in and commiserate with. I do wonder about their conspiracies, but fortunately Kannaroth has some sense.
/////Flynx and Sati are doing well. Sati follows Flynx around everywhere. She's thoroughly enamored of him. I know I'm the one who Impressed her, but sometimes I wonder if she doesn't love him more. I'm not sure whether to be amused or hurt. No, that's not true. I'm amused. I love them both, and I feel a little sorry for her. Flynx seems to regard her as a nuisance more than anything else. Sort of like how you told me little siblings are. It makes me wonder what will happen when Sati's old enough to lay eggs, if Flynx will give chase or continue to ignore her.
/////And apparently I'm nearly out of hide. I love you both,
/////Jasrai
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Princess_Feylin Vice Captain
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Princess_Feylin Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Feb 14, 2010 5:29 pm
Letter Home /////Mum and Da,
/////Remember how I mentioned the position the Weyr's in, where there's really no proper Weyrwoman at the moment since Shaith's last clutch (the one Roseth's from)? Well, that's been cleared up. Malkai's gold Kaveth rose first and was caught by I'dan's Rakyth, so now we have a new Weyrwoman and Weyrleader. It's just as well. D'rak was, from all accounts, a drunk, and not particularly effective as a Weyrleader. I don't expect much to change in my life. At least, I didn't until Kaveth laid her clutch.
/////There are nine eggs in the clutch, and one of them is a queen egg. Before you worry about it, I don't regret not waiting for this clutch. It's not like that. I could not be happier with a gold than I am with Roseth. Even with the special challenges that come with being her rider. You didn't raise me to be like that, anyway. I mean, it might have been interesting to Impress a gold, but can you honestly see me as a future Weyrwoman? Of course you can, you're my parents. But I assure you, as a less biased source, I'm a perfect match with Roseth, who is becoming distressed as I write this, so I should continue with the best news: the new clutch has removed a lot of the critical scrutiny I've been under. It's a very good thing.
/////And here's another good thing: Roseth and I are considered senior weyrlings now, which means we'll be flying together soon, and shortly after we prove we're able to fly together we get to move into our own weyrs. Not that I don't like Y'kar and A'li, but I'm an only child. This living with other people thing is so strange. Even after two and a half turns, I'm not used to it and I find myself craving solitude and silence. Not that I'm likely to get that with a dragon and two firelizards sharing brainspace with me.
/////Oh, I completely forgot. Everyone likes to bet on what's inside each egg. I know you're not here, and won't be here for the hatching, but I thought you might at least want to know what I'm guessing. The one's obviously a queen egg. You can just tell. The Spicy Red, I think, has to be a bronze. It's the largest in the clutch. The next largest is the Orange Stripe egg, and I think that one might be either a bronze or a brown. The Grey Speckled is another brown, I think. The Streaked Sky could be brown or blue, but I'm leaning toward blue. I think the Pink Charcoal one is blue, too, and the Blue Earth, though that one could be a green. The last two, New Grass and Three Spots, are obviously greens.
/////Hopefully yours,
/////Jasrai
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Posted: Fri Mar 05, 2010 6:31 pm
Letter Home /////Mum and Da
/////Don't worry. I know you can hardly help it when I open a letter that way, but you really mustn't worry. There have been rumors of plague at High Reaches Weyr, but I'm not there. I'm at Telgar, and there's been no danger of it here. Yes, our Weyrleaders were there when the diagnoses were made, but they don't have it. They didn't bring it back here. So don't worry about me. I'm fine. I'm in no danger. All is well here.
/////Shells, all's even well over at High Reaches, from what I hear. They've sent that clutch of theirs, the one that hatched jsut after Roseth's, to some other Weyr, Ghenza. Apparently they'll be staying there until the danger has passed. I know it sounds serious, but if there'd been any risk, they would have sent me off somewhere safe, too. The Weyr protects its own. So I'm being looked after.
/////You, however, had best take care. And make sure Grandda takes care of himself. Tell him I said the elderly and infirm are more likely to be susceptible. I'm sure he'll curse and argue with you, but he'll submit if you tell him I said so. You know I always get my way with him. But make sure he sees a healer, all right? I want him to be around for a long time. And you two, too. Stay healthy.
/////Please, please, please take care,
/////Jasrai
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Princess_Feylin Vice Captain
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Princess_Feylin Vice Captain
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Posted: Fri Mar 05, 2010 6:31 pm
Letter Home /////Grandda,
/////I have good news for you and I have bad news. I'll give you the good news first in the hopes that it'll sink in before you start worrying. I swear, I'm fine now. Well, I'm taking lots of numbing medicants, but I'm mostly fine. Maybe I should just give you the bad news right off, rather than alluding to it so that you'll worry less. Roseth says that would be kinder of me. I can't believe that my socially inept little green is offering me social advice, but I think she may be right.
/////So, the bad news is that I'm going to have a new scar. Roseth and I were doing some clandestine practicing of different tricks. I was practicing jumping onto Roseth's back while she's already in the air. I jumped and caught her wrong. My weight overbalanced her and she rolled and we both fell. I landed first, and she landed on top of me. It was a bit of a shock and I hit my head, but I wasn't seriously injured by that, somehow.
/////My major source of injury came when Roseth tried to get up and raked my left arm with the claw on one of her wings. That was bad, and I bled a lot, but I got to the infirmary without anyone really noticing me and a young man named Yulu patched me up. I think he was a candidate, and he had a gold. Flynx and Sati were oddly helpful. I was actually able to get them to clean up the trail of blood that I left. It was kind of amazing that Flynx understood what I wanted them to do, actually.
/////Anyway, my arm's all stitched up. I didn't count how many stitches went into it. I still haven't. I don't want to know. Mostly I try not to think about it, and whenever it hurts I spread just enough numbweed over it to take the edge off. Because I can't afford to have anyone know how I got injured, I also can't afford to have anyone know I'm injured at all, so I have to put up with the discomfort or risk tearing the stitches because I can't feel I'm doing it.
/////Roseth is in a state of severe guilt, though I've tried to convince her it wasn't on purpose and no one would blame her. I certainly don't. Flynx might, and Sati thinks as Flynx does, but I don't think Roseth much cares what the 'lizards think. I'm sure she'll get over the guilt eventually, but probably not until my arm stops hurting, since she claims she's reminded of it every time it pains me. I kind of wish I could just numb it into oblivion so she'd stop feeling guilty, but I can't take the risk.
/////Now for the good news, which actually happened before the bad news, thank goodness. I have a weyr of my own. My own space! I love it. Right now it's pretty neat and orderly, but you know it won't stay that way. Give me a few sevendays, and it'll be as messy as my room in the hold was. Probably worse, since I have two firelizards to help me mess it up, and Roseth, who doesn't see the point in cleaning up if it's just going to get messy again.
/////I'm running short on space, but what I'd really like you to take out of this is that I'm fine, and my parents don't need to know I got hurt. You can tell them about my weyr, though.
/////Love,
/////Jasrai
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Posted: Fri Mar 12, 2010 6:58 am
Letter Home /////Grandda,
/////You won't believe the outcome of the hatching. I didn't actually attend. I was holed up in my weyr. The painkillers I was given following the incident I told you about. The one where Roseth landed on me. Anyway, I really wasn't in any state for a hatching, but Roseth went and she announced everything. And it wasn't as though I didn't hear all about it from Y'kar later on. Apparently the hatching was quite an affair.
/////Happily, it wasn't nearly as violent as the last one. No one died. There was some violence. A small bronze threw a woman from the stands onto the sands - he was the only stands Impression - and a blue savaged a woman and apparently stole her jewelry. Oh, yes. There were four greens, two blues, one brown, and two bronzes. I don't know if you remember the egg count, but that's nine eggs. The much-prized egg that everyone knew was going to be a queen turned out to be an enormous bronze. I think his name is Morgath or something to that effect. All I can say is that I am extremely amused.
/////One nice thing about this hatching is that much of the negative attention Roseth and her clutchmates have been receiving has been shifted. Not in the form of negative attention, of course, but now everyone has something new and shiny to fawn over. I believe two girls Impressed greens at this most recent hatching, by the way. I suppose I ought to make myself known to them, though apparently the healer who treated my arm, the one I thought was a male, was actually a girl. She was one of the ones who Impressed. I don't know the other one.
/////Honestly, I'm not sure I care to get to know the newest female greenriders. I just want to mind my own business and stay out of trouble until I'm assigned to a wing. Roseth already dislikes one of those greens, who is apparently sweet and well-liked. I have tried to reassure her that they'll become as unpopular as we are, given time. The novelty will wear off. It usually does.
/////Please share as much of this with my parents as you can without worrying them.
/////Jasrai
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Princess_Feylin Vice Captain
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Princess_Feylin Vice Captain
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Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2010 8:56 am
Letter Home /////Mum and Da,
/////Your daughter is growing up into the crazy flit lady. You may never have grandchildren, I'm afraid, but you will have many firelizards and a dragon to pamper if you feel so inclined. I'm really not exaggerating here. At the time I'm writing this letter I have five firelizards perched in various locations nearby and an egg in a jar on the hearth. It's getting to be ridiculous. Want to hear how it's come to pass?
/////After the hatching the firelizards of Telgar all seemed to go into heat more or less simultaneously. First Y'kar's Treasure was flown by some other person's 'lizard, Melpo. Y'kar gave me an egg from that clutch which hatched a stripey, foul-tempered green that I've named Kitterin. Kit hates everyone except me so far, and demonstrates her affection and her aversion in much the same way. Through biting, that is. The difference, from what I can tell, is in the amount of blood. Basically, if she's awake, someone's getting bitten. Fortunately, she spends lots of time asleep.
/////The next firelizard I got was Hourem. He's a brown, and he's a real sweetie. He spends most of his life in terror, which makes me feel incredibly guilty. This is because the poor thing also happens to be Kit's favorite person to bully. Flynx is unimpressed with him and generally ignores him, though sometimes he'll snap at him. I'm glad Roseth seems to have taken a liking to him, because she's good at protecting him from Kit's torments and I can't watch them all every minute of the day. Sometimes he vanishes for hours at a time, and every time he does I worry that he won't come back - firelizards do that when they're unhappy enough, you know, go wild - but he always does. I think he actually goes to his mother, Song, who belongs to one of the girls who Impressed at the last hatching. She's a gold, and was flown by a visitor's bronze shortly after the hatching. I'm still not sure why I got Rem's egg.
/////Sirsi is one of Flynx's get. He flew Y'kar's Treasure and they produced a clutch of nine eggs. It's remarkable. Y'kar took an egg that ended up being a very pretty brown with lighter stripes. I took an egg that I thought might have a green, since I didn't think Flynx would really welcome the competition a larger firelizard would represent and Rem didn't need anyone else who could bully him. We sold the other eggs for a nice profit. When my 'lizard hatched, it ended up being Sir. Sir is very blue with lighter blue stripes on his tail and limbs. He's very affectionate, and seems to adore everyone. He and Rem get along well, which makes me very happy.
/////And then Flynx was still feeling randy apparently, and so he's recently gone and flown another gold (I guess I should be proud?). This clutch is only six eggs, and Shimmer's owner and I each are keeping an egg, but the rest we're selling. I could probably make a nice supplemental income off of firelizard eggs. But I could also become a crazy flit lady. I should probably not keep an egg from every clutch if I do decide to go into the 'lizard breeding business.
/////You may have noticed that Sati did not fly. I must point out that she's a green, so it's very likely she has produced some clutches - she's certainly been heavy lately - but I've not found where she's hidden them. She may not know. Greens are known for losing their clutches. I hope that whoever finds them doesn't do so by stepping on them. I suspect Sati was not flown by Flynx, since he's been particularly irritable with her lately, but I really have no way of knowing.
/////I blame you and Grandda for all of this, you know. And I love you very much.
/////Yours,
/////Jasrai
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Posted: Tue Apr 13, 2010 4:12 pm
Letter Home /////Grandda,
/////I'm writing to you about this because I don't think Mum and Da would really be too thrilled to hear about the newest development. Particularly since I've been doing my very best to keep them ignorant as the the sort of relationship I have with the rest of the Weyr. That is, most of the Weyr doesn't like me and I try not to do anything to give them more reason. Actually, the pressure's eased off a lot since the hatching, when there were new targets for their ire, but the resentment is still there.
/////Anyway, recently Y'kar, A'li, and I were called to meet with Weyrwoman Malkai and she handed us a fairly insulting ultimatum. I guess it's not really that insulting, but she definitely implied that our performance in our lessons was sub-par. I know for a fact that our dragons have been performing very well. Roseth and I can do things I'm pretty sure no other dragon-rider pair in the Weyr can do, and Kannaroth is ridiculously clever and agile. Even Nellath is good at what she does, and reliable, even if she's not fast or particularly intelligent. And it's not like A'li and Y'kar are doing poorly at their lessons. If anyone's performing below standards, it would be me, and I know I'm not. Not anymore. Which is part of why I feel insulted by Malkai's attitude.
/////Anyway, she offered the three of us an opportunity to redeem ourselves. She made it very clear that she was not impressed with our progress and that we would not be assigned to a wing after finishing our training as senior weyrlings. Actually, she said that if we disappointed in her proposal, we wouldn't graduate from senior weyrling status at all. So we are to be the bitches, to use the vulgar, of various Weyr authorities. Not that Malkai put it that way. She's far too cold and proper to use slang, I think. I suppose I've shocked you with my language, but my mood is dark right now.
/////Y'kar, lucky b*****d, jumped on the chance to help out in I'dan's Wing. I mean, the moment he saw it was an option he had Kannaroth tell the other dragons that he wanted it. A'li's so much of a smothering brotherly type, he'd never think of going up against Y'kar. I'll tell you something: I thought about it. It would have done me a great deal of good to be in such a position. I'dan's wing has a female rider in it already, and it would have been a chance for me to show the weyrleader that I'm just as capable as anyone else, despite my unimpressive beginnings here. But, no. I'dan, conniving little b*****d that he is, snatched up that chance. I can't say I'm surprised, but I also can't say I'm as amused as I usually am by his self-serving habits. Unlike me, he'll have other opportunities to catch the weyrleader's eye. As a female rider, I get s**t all the time. He has seriously pissed me off.
/////I think I shall avoid him for the time being, until I stop wanting to hit him for being so selfish. It's the only thing I can think to do that will salvage our relationship, because right now I really am angry enough with him that I might say something unforgivable. It also grates on my nerves that I'll have to say to everyone that I didn't try for the position with I'dan because I didn't want to get in Y'kar's way. That's part of it. The other part is because I never had a chance at it.
/////A'li's choice matters less to me, but it also irritates me. He's going to be helping J'ev with the new weyrlings. Roseth wanted that position, and I spent several days talking her out of it. I wonder now if I shouldn't have just let her have her way. She would have liked the opportunity to show of and J'ev might've gotten a chance to see how well we work together as a rider pair. But, no. A'li will be helping. Another opportunity for me to prove that I have worth and value shot down, and it's really all my fault. I talked myself and my dragon out of it because I was convinced I wouldn't be allowed to be an example to others because of my sex.
/////Being in this stupid Weyr is getting to me. I mean, it got to me before, but in a different way. Now I'm beginning to accept their attitude and adjust my behavior accordingly. I never meant to be like that. It raises the question in my mind once more whether I should request to transfer to High Reaches once Roseth is fully grown. I can't imagine Telgar would mourn my departure overmuch, and High Reaches might even welcome a rider who can pull of the sort of stunts Roseth and I can.
/////I suppose you're wonder what I will do, since I won't be working under I'dan or J'ev. Well, I won't even be working with a dragonrider, for starters. I'll be working with Master Dragonhealer Faltar. I suppose he's a decent man, but I can't see how working with him will help me. You taught me to look out for myself, and with the best positions filled, this was the next best I could come up with. I don't know if I can make it work for me. I don't do well with blood, as you know, and there's no point in me learning dragonhealing beyond what I was taught in weyrling lessons. There are real dragonhealers to do that sort of thing.
/////I guess I'll have an opportunity to deal with the new weyrlings this way, since we're required to do weekly check-ups with the dragonhealer until our dragons are fully grown, but I'm not particularly interested in dealing with them. Neither is Roseth. I am also failing to see how this position will benefit Roseth at all. The only way in which I can really see this placement working for me is that I'll have an opportunity to show off to Faltar how well I manage having six firelizards (the sixth is a brown I call Moraket). As if that really makes a difference in a dragonrider's life. Y'kar has ten firelizards, by the way. Well. Nine and an egg, but it may as well be ten. So I can't really even stand out for my mastery of firelizards.
/////I'm sorry to complain to you, particularly since there's nothing you can do about it. There isn't anything. Please don't go to any effort trying. I'll deal with this. I'm an adult. It's expected that I will deal with this as an adult. Just because things aren't going my way doesn't mean I can't figure out how to turn them to my advantage. I'll just have to stay alert. Any suggestions you may have would be more than welcome, however. As long as they don't involve illegal activities. I'd like to avoid those (not that you ever encouraged me to pursue them anyway).
/////I love you. I'll be fine. Someday I may even get to come home and show you how fine I am. You'd hardly recognize me, I think. I've lost a lot of weight and gained a good deal of muscle tone. I mean, I'm still heavier than everyone else I know, but I'm not actually fat anymore. So that's good, I guess. Shards, I miss you.
/////Jasrai
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Princess_Feylin Vice Captain
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