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 Posted: Tue Sep 15, 2009 3:06 pm
I noticed that only two are meant to be had, but I like creating more, in case I need to scramble for a backup. But I guess it would be better to just remove it, saving it for is the last one isn't used.
I can't use fire, sadly, as it was claimed for Mars. Since I wanted to keep with the phoenix theme, I figured heat would be the best of compromises, Though it's one that has to be carefully descriptive and not step on the toes of Mars.
Thanks for the input!
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Posted: Wed Sep 30, 2009 9:52 pm
I'm not to good at this, but I'll give it a shot. I think you did a very good job with her physical description, her family information, and I just think it's a great concept in general! I hope to RP with you once we both get our characters, because Mara is a very interesting character. Oh by the way! The art of her looks amazing!
The only thing I can think of that you might want to do is add little descriptions, or reasons why she likes them, to her hobbies. It's just a suggestion though.
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Posted: Thu Oct 01, 2009 2:58 pm
-applauds- Senshi phoenix is epic win! -nods- I love the art refs -omg did you do those yourself? Beautiful!- And the info, she would be a pretty cool senshi.
The information is all there and it seems well rounded. -snugs- I actually enjoyed reading this, cause its enough info to be good, but not enough to overload everything.
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Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 1:12 pm
Naru: Why thank you! I went a head and did as you suggested, didn't see a reason not to honestly. And I'm glad you enjoy her. I know I do.
Shini: Can I call you Shini? I also want to say I know you from some where.... I'm not sure where tho... ANYWAY.
*snugs back lyke whoa* I'm glad you like her too (I totally enjoyed your characters) and I'm glad the art is such a hit. I'll be redoing the art of her first costume, maybe. We'll see. But yes, the art was done by my, though the one of her not in school uniform was colored by Amasis~ <3
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Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 10:15 pm
-dances- Shweet! Omg thank you for the crit! -best crit I've ever gotten- Huh..We probably do know each other from somewhere! I get about quite a bit in the bc threads -nods-
Gah..I cant stop reading her profile info..-not just cause Im staring at the art I swear!- I just noticed how much detail you put into her attacks..EEEH! Epic times two! And her family info..and..and..-gah I wish she was my senshi shes that good- Muahhahaha..I believe I'm just going to continue stalking this particular quest -nods- Maybe see if you come up with any other interestingly wonderful chars.
I did find one thing to finally truly crit on her though! -yes finally!- Her trustworthyness, could it also be turned against her? Does she trust/lend her trust to just anyone or does she have to know that person a little bit first. Would she be there for anyone..even..a baddie..dun dun dun..
Oooh I love it, and the plottyness one could get with her! If you do get her you must swear to rp with me sometime -snug-
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Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2009 12:40 pm
She automatically trusts anyone. Every one is given the benefit of the doubt until proven otherwise. Yes it can be used against her. And I like it that way. So much can be done. owo
And yes! We must rp! <333
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Posted: Tue Oct 20, 2009 2:36 pm
I do not have much to say here, I think you have summed everything up that I would like to know about Sailor Phoenix! She sounds like a lot of fun and I look forward to seeing you get her as a student/senshi. Good luck!
PS. Your art is amazing! If you take commissions I will definitely get a Lurichiya drawing from you! xD
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Posted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 1:25 pm
Ready for marking, please! ^ ^
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Posted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 9:30 pm
 A phobia is not a flaw! 'Shy' isn't a flaw either -- and what you'll want to think about regarding heat is WHY it's different to Fire and Mars; it's just a really difficult sphere TO not overlap with Sailor Mars. <3
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Posted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 7:47 pm
Reworked her flaws and attacks. Ready for marking~
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Posted: Mon Nov 23, 2009 5:37 pm
Clumsy isn't a flaw. It has nothing to do with personality, so it doesn't belong here. What might belong in flaws is the downside of Curiosity. Does it get her into trouble - physical or just with people going off at her? If so, it belongs here. If not, no worries. I think you really need to find something in Amara's personality that isn't about being walked all over. She's forgiving, she's introverted, she's meek... Basically everyone is going to trample on her and she'll have nothing to do in RP apart from stand there shyly watching others, or obeying them. (I am having this same issue with one of my quests, I know that it's hard, but I also know it'll make for such boring RP.) I don't think you've countered Rose's earlier comment about heat being too hard not to overlap Mars? The Eternal stage attack still makes me channel Mars - fire and phoenix, which one of her attacks (Fire Soul Bird) had. The earlier attack, removing heat, just seems more suited to a senshi or ice or cold. I think you need to drop heat, unless you can find an aspect that isn't winding up with things on fire, or going too far opposite and suiting an ice/cold senshi.
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Posted: Tue Nov 24, 2009 2:03 am
Her character is waaaay too introverted! As kali mentioned, it sounds as if she'd do very little aside from standing in an RP trying to hide behind a book or trying to get out of an RP as soon as it starts! I suggest dropping extreme introversion and upping her curiousity. Her curiousity virtue mentions reading several chapters ahead in order to learn more... Does she ever stay up late at night in order to learn more? Or has she missed deadlines/classes due to being hooked in a book just needing to know more? I agree with Kali and rose with her Eternal attack seeming too lose to Sailor Mars. Perhaps her first attack should heat up an area rather than make it colder, as to not tred on cold/ice Senshi?
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Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2009 12:12 pm
Once again flaws and attacks have been reworked. <3
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Posted: Sat Dec 05, 2009 4:51 pm
Name has also been changed to fit in with recent unavailability of the star name Phoenix.
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Posted: Wed Dec 23, 2009 10:33 pm
Much closer! The personality is much improved, I can see far more RP opportunities for her now. I want more information on Trustworthiness. I want to know WHY she's trustworthy, what she does, what she puts aside or doesn't do in order to make herself trustworthy. You're basically telling us "she's trusthworthy" without saying why or in what way. What do people trust her with? Who trusts her - teachers, parents, other students? They'd all be looking for different things to make her trustworthy to them. Can you trust her with secrets? Hard tasks? Extra responsibility? The only other personality issue is that Curiosity seems to be all about reading ahead in her books and manga. I don't consider that curiosity, per se, which would be more about investigating things, learning secrets, exploring places she shouldn't... If it's only about books, I think you need to rename it and focus on the emotions BEHIND it - what parts of her personality make it so hard to put something down, or to wait. Is it just impatience? Still not liking the first attack. Please find something that USES heat, not removes it. You're treading on the toes of water and ice senshi, of which there are some coming through RL slots already.
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