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 Posted: Wed Jan 06, 2010 10:18 am
This is totally cracked, but it was fun, so I'm posting it here for reference anyway. Dated to the Pit Stop raffle. XD
10:00:14 PM Kota: redd feels intimidated by the amount of pecs in coctail
10:00:18 PM Kota: )8
10:00:22 PM Kota: *cocktail
10:00:22 PM RaiMidori: OTL
10:00:24 PM RaiMidori: SRS?
10:00:29 PM Kota: BUT BENTES WILL NOT LEAVE HIM HE IS SURE
10:00:38 PM Kota: just in case he looks for blackmail
10:02:51 PM RaiMidori: LOL
10:02:52 PM RaiMidori: okay
10:03:57 PM Kota: they're raffling off a racing boy
10:03:59 PM Kota: with no shirt
10:04:03 PM Kota: and many muscles
10:04:05 PM Kota: lD
10:08:44 PM RaiMidori: Oooer
10:08:44 PM RaiMidori: LOL
10:08:45 PM RaiMidori: XD
10:08:58 PM Kota: WHEN THE ATTRACTIVE APPEAR THE RICH GET NERVOUS
10:09:02 PM Kota: THIS IS THE WAY OF THINGS
10:10:35 PM RaiMidori: LOL
10:10:36 PM RaiMidori: OH MY
10:10:46 PM Kota: Redd is very nervous
10:10:48 PM Kota: but also
10:10:51 PM Kota: he reassures himself
10:10:53 PM Kota: very rich
10:10:56 PM Kota: and very attractive
10:11:05 PM Kota: LOVE ME FOR MY MANSION, HONEY
10:11:09 PM Kota: LOVE ME FOR MY CAR
10:11:18 PM Kota: KEEP IT SUPERFICIAL, BABY
10:11:21 PM RaiMidori: AHAHHAHAA
10:11:22 PM Kota: THAT'S THE WAY WE ARE
10:11:25 PM Kota: ;DDDD
10:11:26 PM RaiMidori:
10:14:46 PM Kota: so darling
10:14:48 PM Kota: he asks
10:14:51 PM Kota: leaning on the counter
10:15:15 PM Kota: you think i'm better looking than Abs McMeathead, right
10:15:20 PM Kota: quality over quantity, right
10:15:25 PM Kota: I HAVE A MANSION
10:15:27 PM Kota: RIGHT
10:17:53 PM RaiMidori: LOL
10:17:59 PM RaiMidori: Bentes says she wants neither
10:18:12 PM Kota: what what so cold
10:18:13 PM RaiMidori: she would rather read
10:18:15 PM Kota: says Redd
10:18:18 PM RaiMidori: or even eat pastries
10:18:22 PM Kota: I'm freezing over here
10:18:24 PM Kota: in my big
10:18:25 PM RaiMidori: LOL
10:18:26 PM Kota: elegant mansion
10:18:35 PM Kota: with stuff in it (nice stuff)
10:18:41 PM RaiMidori: LOL
10:19:01 PM Kota: c'mon Bentes, don't be shy, i have lots of books (and a car)
10:19:05 PM Kota: (sports car)
10:19:07 PM Kota: (just sayin')
10:19:34 PM RaiMidori: LOl
10:19:39 PM Kota: and i don't offer this to just anyone (not to men anyway)
10:19:50 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: -blink blink- No, thank you.
10:20:10 PM RaiMidori: -returns to Complete Glossary of Gardening Terms-
10:20:23 PM Kota: (damn it's the gardening)
10:20:28 PM Kota: h-hey, so
10:20:38 PM Kota: how bout I water your petunias ;D
10:20:51 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: -looks up, suddenly interested-
10:21:06 PM Kota: You, me
10:21:15 PM Kota: Garden of Eden, same old thing
10:21:29 PM Kota: I mean, come -on- come -on-, I was BUILT for this rendezvous
10:21:32 PM Kota: ;DDDDDD
10:21:34 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: ... -looks down again-
10:21:35 PM Kota: you
10:21:36 PM Kota: me
10:21:39 PM RaiMidori: (LOL I LOVE REDD)
10:21:40 PM Kota: -petunias-
10:21:44 PM RaiMidori: (I WOULD SO MARRY HIM)
10:21:51 PM RaiMidori: (SRS)
10:22:01 PM Kota: (LOLLLL HE IS SUCH FUN)
10:22:16 PM Kota: (I SHOULD LOG THIS IN HIS JOURNAL)
10:22:17 PM RaiMidori: (YESSSS)
10:23:41 PM Kota: So Bentes, come on, honestly
10:23:49 PM Kota: You can tell me, I'm a pretty fair guy
10:24:08 PM Kota: do you -really- find gardening more interesting than ~*~*~*romance~*~*~*
10:31:46 PM RaiMidori: LOL
10:31:52 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: Yes.
10:32:39 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: -looking away- Romance is nothing but a kidish fantasy. I would have thought you to know at least that.
10:32:52 PM Kota: well, YEAH
10:32:59 PM Kota: i was talking about attraction. )8
10:33:03 PM Kota: of a petunia-watering
10:33:04 PM Kota: nature
10:33:07 PM Kota: ;D
10:33:08 PM Kota: ;D
10:33:13 PM Kota: my door is always open
10:33:16 PM Kota: -always-
10:33:41 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: If you have any experience in gardening, you're welcome to help me attend to my garden. That is all.
10:38:15 PM Kota: I see how it is. )8<
10:38:19 PM Kota: I will be back
10:38:23 PM Kota: with a spade
10:38:29 PM Kota: and gardening gloves
10:38:45 PM Kota: and KNOWLEDGE
10:38:49 PM Kota: (and money just sayin')
10:39:09 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: Then I will take you, if you are so eager -peers over edge of book suspiciously-
10:39:33 PM Kota: oh baby, i'm eager for you-
10:39:36 PM Kota: r garden ;D
10:40:16 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: -narrows eyes slightly before returning wordlessly to her literature-
10:40:45 PM Kota: *Comes back with gardening tools*
10:40:51 PM Kota: I bought roses.
10:41:06 PM Kota: and i was going to give them to you
10:41:10 PM Kota: but then there was this girl
10:41:13 PM Kota: it's a long story
10:41:20 PM Kota: all night long
10:41:21 PM Kota: in fact
10:41:26 PM Kota: but i'm ready to garden
10:41:28 PM Kota: 8D
10:42:05 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: -eyes lit up at mention of roses, but cloud over with disgust/I KNEW IT at the rest of the sentence- You're eager.
10:42:27 PM RaiMidori: ((She's secretly a romantic 8'D SOMETIMES. Too much Jane Austen, I sayy))
10:42:32 PM Kota: i see that look on your face
10:42:38 PM Kota: you're UPSET, aren't you
10:42:42 PM Kota: HAH
10:42:44 PM Kota: HAHAHAHA
10:43:06 PM Kota: THAT MEANS YOU HAD EXPECTATIONS
10:43:20 PM Kota: YOU HAVE TO HAVE HAD EXPECTATIONS FOR ME IF I UNDERWHELMED YOU
10:43:32 PM Kota: YOU -DO- CARE
10:43:53 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: Hardly. I'm only disappointed that you've proven yourself to be just the kind of man I thought you were.
10:44:02 PM Kota: That means there was doubt!
10:44:29 PM Kota: -you- are in such deep denial that my money and I are really quite alarmed
10:44:34 PM Kota: let us go garden
10:45:02 PM RaiMidori: ((I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING.))
10:45:09 PM Kota: ((LOLLL))
10:46:05 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: -stands up hesitantly- If you really are such a keener on gardening, you'd prove it to me this instant. Otherwise you're not getting near my tea roses.
10:46:17 PM Kota: I was prepared for this
10:46:30 PM Kota: which is why i brought this chorus line
10:47:38 PM Kota: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3FkaN0HQgs
10:47:49 PM Kota: and john denver
10:48:23 PM RaiMidori: LOL WOW
10:48:23 PM RaiMidori: WOOOW
10:49:57 PM RaiMidori: AHAHAHAH
10:50:00 PM RaiMidori: I also hear the picolo
10:50:03 PM RaiMidori: piccolo
10:50:21 PM Kota: LOL yes
10:50:48 PM Kota: Redd: Have I satisfied your criteria? I HEAR MUSIC SOOTHES THE ICY MAIDEN
10:50:57 PM Kota: and ice surely can't be good for your roses ;O
10:53:42 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: Perhaps. But neither is a garrulous man entirely incompetent in gardening.
10:54:40 PM Kota: ...
10:54:45 PM Kota: *pulls out a dictionary*
10:54:58 PM Kota: *FLIPFLIPFLIP* ga... gar...
10:55:07 PM Kota: *witty comeback generating*
10:55:12 PM Kota: AH, YES
10:55:36 PM Kota: but who better to complement the ice maiden than the garrulous man?
10:55:42 PM Kota: 8D
11:00:54 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: Still incapable of subtlety, I see. Might I remind you of the reason you are here? -gestures towards flowers-
11:01:53 PM Kota: I meant in gardening.
11:02:22 PM Kota: Really, Ice Maiden, I don't spend all my time thinking about how to win your heart.
11:02:46 PM Kota: I have far better things to do, like count my money and date lovely, extraordinarily tall women, and take expensive vacations
11:02:49 PM Kota: and count my money.
11:03:12 PM Kota: In fact, the amount of time you see me is hardly a tenth of my busy schedule!
11:03:23 PM Kota: (More like a half)
11:03:32 PM Kota: And I have far better things to think about!
11:03:55 PM Kota: I also have a mansion.
11:03:57 PM Kota: A nice one.
11:04:01 PM Kota: Gardening!
11:06:00 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: You refer to me as ice maiden.
11:06:32 PM Kota: You refer to me as a garrulous. )8
11:07:44 PM Kota: I can refer to you as something else, if you'd like
11:07:47 PM Kota: Darling...
11:08:01 PM Kota: Or sweetheart...
11:08:19 PM Kota: Or the Missus...
11:08:20 PM Kota: ;D
11:09:08 PM Kota: But you know, you just really want to get on with the gardening here, and I don't blame you, since it really is su-u-u-per fun, as shown by Mr. John Denver...
11:09:18 PM Kota: So let's see to those roses, mmm?
11:10:20 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: Let's -turns away rather elegantly-
11:11:33 PM Kota: So you know, Katherine, my little
11:11:35 PM Kota: servant
11:11:36 PM Kota: thing
11:12:18 PM Kota: She pointed out yesterday
11:12:48 PM Kota: that women love candy.
11:12:57 PM Kota: So I took the liberty
11:13:01 PM Kota: (tiny liberty)
11:13:04 PM Kota: (with my money)
11:13:17 PM RaiMidori: ((LOL OH ATHEIOS ABOVE))
11:13:28 PM Kota: of ordering some to be brought here. However, I didn't know what kind you like
11:13:35 PM Kota: (popsicles seemed too obvious)
11:13:38 PM Kota: So I just
11:13:43 PM Kota: asked them to bring the store.
11:13:48 PM Kota: They'll just be
11:13:49 PM Kota: you know
11:13:52 PM Kota: waiting outside
11:13:57 PM Kota: for when we're done.
11:15:14 PM Kota: You don't have any peanut allergies, I hope
11:15:22 PM Kota: I'd have to give you mouth to mouth or something
11:15:24 PM Kota: actually
11:15:30 PM Kota: do you have any allergies? ;D
11:17:36 PM RaiMidori: Bentes: I don't really like candy. But no, I don't. -looks up at him, unsure of whether or not he's joking-
11:17:50 PM Kota: *Ice cream jingle playing outside*
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Posted: Wed Feb 10, 2010 8:54 pm
Levi Redd was doing crosswords.
Though they were perhaps, not the flashiest way to pass the time, or exactly what one would expect from a persona as elaborately constructed as Redd's was, he enjoyed them when he was alone. He had books and booksfull of finished ones lying around Katherine's house because he simply didn't know what to do with them all once he finished. Crosswords. He loved puzzles and challenges of any sort, but Katherine always bought them and he had become hooked. His vocabulary was significantly larger than the average individual's because of them. He had memorized the dictionary because of them, because if there was anything Redd would go to any length to achieve, it was victory.
The devil went down to Georgia, and Redd went up to the bookshelf. Everyone had their vices, although most people didn't count crossword puzzles among them. Redd did. Crossword puzzles could ruin his reputation, after all. What sort of man of wealth and taste went home and picked up the Sunday paper to try and see how quickly he could solve 4 across? And reputation was what counted, at least to him. With a reputation, particularly one that preceded you, people would think you were capable of more than you were. A reputation could do so much for him, things he couldn't do on his own. It was almost a partner in crime.
He chewed on the tip of his pen (pencil was for sissies, after all) as he stared at 19 down. He supposed that in the end, it was the boredom that drove him to it. He lived for risk, for challenge, but in Katherine Hunt's house, things were pretty much cut and dry. Yes, he did dabble in some activities of questionable legality- His private bank account had more money in it than hers ever had. But the thing was, it was all getting just a little...
Same-y.
Even the activities of questionable legality. He wasn't the Devil, per se, but there were certain expectations people had of him that had rubbed off on his personality. He wasn't sure that if he had come from a different cocktail he would have ever learned to play the violin, or bothered to start trying to manipulate people. But people, even Katherine, had acted like they wanted a show, and Redd had given them a show. And he was used to giving them a show, it was practically normal now to do all those things they expected of him, almost easy.
His mind flashed to the unimpressed face of Bentes Ornate. She had never expected anything of him, the opposite, she ignored all his performances. So he tried harder. She was like crossword puzzles, a vice, a challenge, something he couldn't leave be until he figured her out. She interested him, the unsolvable puzzle, the girl who was unwilling to show him her thoughts, or even her derision.
Inscrutable.
He glanced at 19 down again and scribbled something on the paper, staring at the now-complete crossword puzzle in front of him. Katherine would be displeased. She hadn't been able to beat him to the crosswords for months now, and she missed doing the Sunday challenges especially. But he was Levi Redd. She had made him who he was, and what he was was the Man Without Substance. He was all flash and deception, all wild stories and charm. He was a man with few outlets, so she could at least give him the crosswords. Life wasn't challenging anymore. He had to take his 19 downs and Bentes Ornates when he was handed them, and the longer they lasted him, the better.
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