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Mine's really long... Sorry!
10) When I was sixteen, I told a girl that if she didn't stop complaining, I would cut her. She said she wanted to punch me, so I got in her face and said, "Let's ******** go." This was in the middle of an English class project, and so the girl looked at the teacher and I rolled my eyes and went back to my group. (I have no clue why I was so mad at her.)
9) I got lost in a German airport on the way to Italy. No one knew I was lost, because I looked just like them. I had to leap in front of a security guard's go-cart to get someone to hold still long enough for me to ask for directions.
8.) I once saw a kitten die. The experience convinced me that animals have feelings and are sentient beings equal to, but different from, humans.
7) When I was about seven, my parents thought that I was going to run away because they'd seen me packing luggage and stacking it beneath my window in my room. They were concerned that I didn't like my little sister.
Later, when my mom asked, I told her that I was pretending to pick up my long-lost cousin from the airport, and that she hadn't unpacked her luggage yet.
6) My parents were once afraid that they would have to come exorcise our house.
When I was about five or six, I would constantly tell my parents about "Peter." I always wanted to sit by him, play with him, and talk to him. My parents assumed he was my imaginary friend.
One day as we went to the grocery store, I said goodbye to Peter. When my mom asked why he wasn't coming with us, I told her that he couldn't leave the house. I waved to him, and she asked me what window he was at so that she could wave, too. I pointed to a round window that was twenty feet up from the ground, and sat above our staircase. My mom asked me to be sure, and I said, "He's looking out of that round window above the garage." She panicked, and thought that my imaginary friend was really a phantom or something.
My mom found out later that Tom Selleck's character from "Three Men and a Baby," Peter, was my imaginary friend.
5) When I was an infant, a strange woman approached my mother in a restaurant. When she saw me, she exclaimed, "What a beautiful baby girl!" She kissed me right on the face and left a huge red lipstick mark. My parents almost threw me at her.
4) I once saw a ghost at my father's house when I was about eleven.
It was winter time so I'd gone downstairs to stoke the fire up again. My dad's roommate, Todd, was also an IT guy and always worked late. I heard and saw from the corner of my vision as a man about Todd's height approached, unlocked, and opened the sliding glass door beside the driveway. He walked in, closed the door, and locked it. I looked over and greeted him in the darkness as Todd, and he looked at me, then walked into the kitchen.
I got up and followed him to see if he was going to eat anything I'd want to share. When I got to the kitchen, he wasn't there. I walked through the dining room to the computer room, where there was no one. I walked through there to the living room again, and I was still alone. He couldn't have gone up the stairs, because I would have heard them creaking. I felt like I was being watched, but I could no longer see anyone. Later, I found out that Todd hadn't come home that night.
3) I was nearly arrested for shoplifting when I was seventeen. I'm never allowed into Claire's, or The Icing by Claire's for the rest of my life. I stole eleven dollars worth of key chains.
2) I was in a car wreck when I was fifteen. We were four-wheeling in a Bronco down a gravel road. None of us were wearing seatbelts.
When the driver veered to try a 360-degree turn, he lost traction and flipped the truck three times. One kid was thrown out of a window and landed in the gravel. My cousin was next to me; he was thrown into the trunk. The driver and front passenger only stayed in their seats because they had a headbar that they both grabbed onto. I didn't go anywhere, though I did faint while we were rolling. We landed in a ditch that was about three feet deep. Two feet to the right, the ditch deepened to twelve feet and was filled with water. The only injuries we were some cuts and bruises, and I had no injuries at all.
This happened on a military base, and we lied to the MPs that the driver had left us at a bowling alley and then crashed the truck by himself - he didn't want his dad to know that he'd had strangers in his truck.
1) I'm not technically supposed to be alive right now.
While I was being born, the doctors realized that my umbilical cord was wrapped around my throat. My mom couldn't stop pushing, so my dad got in her face and told her that if she pushed and hurt me, he'd be furious. She was so scared, she was able to override her instincts long enough for them to unwind me.
While they did that, I accidentally pooped in my mom's uterus and choked on my own feces, which they had to pry out of my lungs after I was born.
I was also born with hypoglycemia, a blood disease caused by lack of blood sugar, which I believe can become diabetes if not treated.
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