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 Posted: Tue Aug 05, 2008 7:11 pm
"You mean.. just the two of us.. like.. living alone?" ..... "Isoke..."Was he implying that she~ would take her place? She looked up at him. Her tails loosened their grip and she slowly backed away from him. He didn't look the type to be asking her that.. its like... he pitied her. A light defensive growl came out; burrowing in her throat.
"I don't need your pity." She was a lot more defensive- and if things were said straight~ they'd be taken oddly. Another relationship that would crumble.. brother and sister. She couldnt allow that. She already now got another adoptive brother. Susan, he was more of a kit than an adult at times..
But falling for another was hard for her. An unforgiving memories.. "I DONT WANT TO BE LIED TO AGAIN!" She went from yelling and her eyes were watering.. but not coming down her face.. just kept locked in her eyes. Her nails grew in to talons like her mothers.. and her fangs began to grow..
Something she hid from the world.. and since she was so unstable.. it flushed out~ and in front of HIM. Now the tears let out, and started to soak her cheeks.. She hated him seeing her like this- and dint know what to do. "DONT LOOK AT ME! LOOK AWAY!" She quickly turned around and retreated in to her tails to hide her hidden traits from her mom. Crying.. She couldnt believe.. that they had come out~ not now.. she was with him.. this couldnt be.. he'd hate her. She thought.
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Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 8:08 pm
As she pulled away from him Belial hung his head his heart breaking within him. Stupid, why would she want me? he thought barely hearing her words past her growl. "Pity?" he looked up the hurt showing in his yellow eyes. "No Rennoa never that," he said softly. He jumped back as she yelled.
"Again Ren? Who lied, who hurt you so much?" he growled the anger directed at whoever had caused such a change. His eyes all for her tears he didn't notice the physical changes at first. As he took note of fangs and claws he took a defensive stance, spaded tail flicking back and forth. He thought for sure she was going to strike out at him, but the opposite happened she hid and told him to look away. Of course he couldn't, he looked at her fascinated and edged close to her hidden behind her tails like a turtle in its shell.
He sat close, ready to jump back should she change her mind and quietly spoke to her, "Rennoa, talk to me. Tell me what's going on. I want you in my life, please don't pull away from me now. I love you dear heart, please talk to me. If you want I'll walk away after but please at least tell me what's going on before I loose you."
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Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 8:51 pm
"I lost my brother.." She whimpered... Curling it around her heart as it thrawbed.. it ached so.. broken. A forbidden love.. that shattered her inside but it could not continue.. bound to one bond from a god and she lost him entirely. She was loving~ so loving.. and devoted she fell in love.. and be it anyone.. she couldn't have.. so close but far isnt it. though the god must have loved how she was feeling.. the hurt.. He was revenge after all. She looked at him with her fangs large enough to not fit in her maw no longer.. And nails were talons.. Her tails flickered behind her..
Attacking him~ she couldnt.. Her heart was hurting. She hissed as he came close and warned him~ baring her fangs that she hated so much. "YOU TOO! THE OTHERS THAT SAY THEY CARE! THEY DONT! THEY SAY THIS MISS YOU BUT NEVER EVEN COME TO YOU! NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN! ALL THESE LIES! ALL WORDS MEAN NOTHING! ALL PROMISES MEAN NOTHING!!!" She whimpered in her yelling.. she was aching..
She slid her talons over to her sides. Ripping the top layer of ground apart.. Casting her gaze away so he wouldn't see what she had become. "If you wanted me in your life.. you wouldn't had waited so long.. and every time you left.. what am i suppose to DO!" She growled loudly.. The demon blood in her of Kirara- the cat demon. The white in her eyes became red.. She was looking more like her sister with these features in her since they were born. Ren- never showed signs before.. but apparently.. It had leaked out when anger or emotion rose too high for the kind ren to handle.
Huffing softly..trying to calm herself.. but failed. She pulled her ears back and covered her face with her tails. "I lost you a long way back when you turned away...right,.... RIGHT!" The edge of all that was tumbling.. past present and future. All what was kept so locked inside and was hidden under all her laughing and smiling.. Making everyone happy. Everyone's princess... What would they think of her now?
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Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:09 pm
Her brother... He should have known. Knowing how close they were that would be the one thing that could break her. He coudl understand the pain, he felt it now as she accused him of being like the others. Finally he could hold back no longer in the face of her yelling an accusations. "You think I wanted to leave you?" he growled his voice still soft. "I hated leaving you. I didnt' lie to you Ren, I stayed here and watched over you though sometimes you didn't even notice. If anything I'm guilty of that same fault as you, TRUST. I trusted your family to look over you. I'll admit I should have done more, but I let what other's would think block my way." he continued to watch her cautiously unsure of the demon traits coming out of her. Her appearence didn't scare him, he wasn't a hypocrit. What make him nervous was not knowing what she might do in her current state. He continued talking letting out everything he was feeling.
"I couldn't claim you when you were a kit Rennoa, even as accepting as your father is, there was no way. Now though Ren, now you're an adult and its time to make an adult choice. Will you accept my offer? Will you walk away with me and leave all that behind and make a new life with me, with new promises binding us heart to heart. As we've been bound from the begining, unspokenly. Now the words can be spoken. I love you Rennoa, I want you by my side always." He couldn't take any more, he edged closer again and gave her a loving nuzzle and lick. Should the demon in her strike, so be it... it was a risk he was willing to take for her sanity and for their future.
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Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 10:01 pm
'If anything I'm guilty of that same fault as you, TRUST.' She assessed this as she stayed curled in to her ball form. Maybe it had been true.. she processed it in to her head.. And felt bad.
Her mother was kind.. and graceful.. Ren didn't know that this ..was her. She didn't know what blood was running in her.. it boiled as her emotions did. It overflowed and the princess was non no more. Once he licked her- it was in fact true. She swiped at him; rolling on her back and took a swipe out of him.. It wasn't her.. it was the reflex, snatching a hefty strike on his neck. Her eyes widen. All the memories dating back to when she tore a piece of her father's wooden peg up.. To when she bit a rock so hard in punishment for doing what she did to her father. Making her mouth bleed as pieces of her fangs cracked and choke upon the rock.
[ this was an inthread with the family I need to find where that is now x.x; ]
The wound.. stuck in her mind... as she just stared in awe and confusedly.. Did he know? Why did he come near her! Her paws started shaking as the demon traits from her bloodline..emptied.. Her talons retracting.. and her fangs slipping back in to her maw.. Her paw has some of the flesh she ripped out.. It wasn't a fatal blow thankfully. More defensive.. His words swelled over her ears and mind.. as she pulled back a little.. she knew she wouldn't hurt him now.. Why was he still here! Look what she did!
'Will you accept my offer?'....'I love you Rennoa, I want you by my side always.'
"im sorry!" she realized what she had done and freezing up.. shaking viciously.. Look what she did! She could run away.. and lock herself away.. she could have.. but this time she didn't run away.. "Im sorry..im so sorry..." Tears ran down her face.. she had hurt the one battling in her heart and mind since she was young. The hidden feelings.. flourished as she finally pushed forward and clung to him. "Please forgive me! please.. im sorry.. im so sorry for doubting you.." Had she realized.. would he still be there..?
"Please let me fix this.. please.. im sorry.. I didn't mean to i swear!" She wanted to lick it to its care.. but.. she had striked him..letting go of him, ready to be striked. Hurt.. what she did.. like her sister did. Slapping her across the face.. She was ready for punishment for the actions she had taken. She wanted to answer him.. but now was afraid to.. would he believe her if she had told him she had loved him for a long time.. That she wanted to take his offer... now that things were said.. and done. "What I have done.. I can not forgive myself...[heart breaking] If you wanted an answer..[waiting for the hit to her ] .....Yes I would.."To the offer he had handed her.. Her eyes opened to see her paw with the trickling of the hints of blood. Tears rolling down; she wanted to breakdown..she was about to but he was there. The kindness that he was.. how long .. each time she would share the story about their first meeting..
Was that over now? Her ears tucked back.. At his feet now. Blush over her cheeks ..partly because she felt the lick.. and part because she was ashamed.
[ if this is too much please tell me ^^;;; i think i got to in to it T^T... if you dont like anything about it LET ME KNOW! ]
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Posted: Thu Aug 07, 2008 6:41 pm
Belial jumped back with a hiss as she struck. He sat panting a paw pressed against the lightly bleeding scratches and watched her. I can't go too far, I can't let her think I'm leaving. Slowly he moved his paw away from his neck and licked the blood away. "Rennoa?" he whispered her name needing some reasurance from her now. What he got was a broken hearted string of apology and her holding him once again. He purred hoping to get her to calm down. "Its ok, I know you didn't mean to do it. Its ok Ren..."
He didn't know what to say as she finally answered him... She wanted to be with him. For a moment he couldn't breath, he feel to the ground so that they were nose to nose. He licked her nose, "Do you mean it Ren? You want to be with me?" They could work out whatever it was that had happened to awaken the demon within her later, right now he wanted only the joy of the moment.
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Posted: Fri Aug 08, 2008 9:44 pm
When he moved away it strikes her as bad as it would if he went physical with her too. But she closed her eyes.. whimpering.. She did deserve that. The hiss- reassuring that this was all so sweet.. until now.
But then.. he heard his calming voice again. He forgave her??... She opened her eyes moments before he licked her nose.. A blush came over her cheeks even thicker. "...Is.. it alright...?" She said softly.. Her eyes went soft.. Looking in to the face of the ulaya she had been thinking about.. and trying to get him to be with here.. Even jealous of his sister! How low was that...
Affection.. had closed up and was locked in her heart too. She nodded. Answering his question. "...If you want to be with me that is.. If you'll accept me.." She squinted an eye and leaned forward a tiny inch to lick his nose in return. How many times had she created the ring up for such moments.. She thought he was just a lil crush when she was little.. and the longer she went without seeing him. The more her heart started locking itself away. The only other she could and will always share it with was her brother.. but even he had his heart locked away for another.
Her tails swayed behind her.. like if she were a kit again. Smiling brightly to him but a light one at that.. It was still hard to be happy.. but like he said. New promises ... a new life. Maybe even start over. Maybe..
Her mind would start processing everyone else.. but at the moment she just wanted to be with him again. He forgave her and that made her heart lift just a bit.. but her answer- had it surprised him that much? Didn't she all those things like protecting him before? Her mind took some bits and pieces.. maybe she could still keep her word.. if it all went right. A light giggle came from her from thinking it to be so.
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Posted: Sat Aug 09, 2008 2:50 pm
Belial purred with happiness, here he was nose to nose with one cared for him, that had never allowed his differences to frighten her away. He had of course cared for her as child as a the charming open princess she had been. But that affection had grown as he'd watched her grow. That today she had come to him a thoughtful adult made all the difference and his heart embraced the changed her and pulled her close. He couldn't tell what would have happened had she not accepted him, but now he could allow that fear to fall away.
As she licked his nose a thrill went through him from nose to tail. He slowly got to his feet so he could settle beside her. He drapped one paw over her shoulders and licked her cheek. "Of course I accept you as you've accepted me just as I am," He twinned his spaded tail around one of hers. "We'll figure things out as we go on from here, shall we? Its a new begining. My heart, all of me is yours. I take you into my care now and always. Even should circumstances cause us to briefly part you'll always know where to find me." he paused and chuckled. "Though I must stress the "brief" part. "
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Posted: Sat Aug 09, 2008 6:51 pm
As he stood up from their nose to nose position.. She felt the cold. Then the warmth that followed as she calmly took in his words.. She could just cry right now but ever since the time she was hurt.. physically. She ceased.. only this time.. where 'love yous' were exchanged.. And accepting each other as more than just friends.. even guardian and princess. Her other tails swayed as the one that was possessed with his spaded tail.. She kept it interlocked. Then the others cradled the two that were inter angled. She looked in his eyes as he shared words of this 'new beginning' of their lives.. Then when she turned her face- she could smell the blood..
Thick as day- and the white of her eyes flashed red... then back to white as she leaned in more to lick this blood. It was her fault.. and she felt horrible STILL about it.. But this moment only comes once..upon a meeting such as theirs. After the bleeding stopped for a mere second she looked at him. Licking her lips like a cat could. "Then I shall take what is yours.. and fill the emptiness which is myself." Her voice smoothed over as she lightly touched on each subject. "Always you say... I have ..no faith in thus..words. But actions.. maybe time itself will hold it to us... A brief part?"
She thought about this and how she often left with her mind in the clouds of thoughts and ponderment of what is to happen with her.. If she was any use. That is when most of these brief partings would take place; not that she didn't mind his company. "I have accepted- and been accepted. I am happy then..And if any chance.. would you allow for me to take care of a lil one. " This wasn't a question~ More that she would and nothing could stop her. Saffron probley needs her more than anyone at the moment.. and her taking care of him taught her a lot.. and how her mother felt when they were with her siblings and herself as kits. Even now.. The love and affection their family gave.. and always adopting others.. Just plays right and this trait passed on with Saffron and herself.
"Saffron needs me still." She simply said and then started again to groom the wound she had made. Tasting his blood.. would this come again after but she wanted to clean it at least.. Her ears tucked back as she continued. "And where were you thinking on settling." A place to call home.. a place where she could take care of saffron at when it was her days.
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Posted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 9:54 am
Belial nodded slowly while he still lavished affection upon her. He understood that she would need more than words now, the promises were a begining but now he had to follow through. Time together would prove the truth of the words. As she cared for his wounds he considered asking her about what happened, but still the time wasn't right. They would be a reminder for some time to come of a subject they would have to deal with.
Then she caught him with another surprise. "A... a little one?" he stuttered. It took a moment for him to understand, then he remembered her open family and how they'd taken in others to their circle and assumed this "Saffron" was another such. "I like kits and perhaps it would be best to get some practice in..." he chuckled a bit then turned thoughtful again at her next question. "Settling? I admit I havn't given that much thought. I'm used to traveling but if you want to find a place we can definately do that. I want you to be happy."
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Posted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 1:39 am
She kept on licking his wound til at least some protection was on; a layer to not let the blood drain.. thankfully..It wasnt so deep. Her eyes closed as she thought of saffron, the motherly instinct was already there. Just merely sleep til the day came. She looked at him rather emotionless eyes. Stoic even, "practice?" She blankly looked at him....
'What he mean? He looked rather surprised when I said little one..' She thought but kept it inside..
"I am not selfish, I am not complex...and I am easily pleased.. Anything would do for me- I don't need anything thats not within grasp.. or have large allure for whats not needed." She looked at him softly then.. The look. "I wouldn't mind being anywhere with you. If you'd like to travel still. That is fine with me too. I'll always be happy." Her ears fanning behind her. "I want to be safe though.. a place that Saffron can come to whenever he needs me and not be badly wounded on the way. Though this does mean he will be staying with us whenever he needs. Im happy that you like kits- if you didnt I'd rush away with saffron." A little joke- though she would consider the options - Her thoughts~ She would have said somewhere around a body of water- be it small or large. They mostly all shared that. Water calms them so... even if she was afraid of swimming. "I want you to be happy to... if we're going to share our life." She nuzzled under his chin, purring like a kitten needing attention..though that isn't what she seeked. She wanted to assure him this.. Swaying their tails a bit..
There wasn't so much to think about..the future is never set in stone.
"Though I am surprised.. quite a bit." She thought then answered her unfinished thought. "That for so long.. then come to find me talking about my life being intertwined with another..." Other than her brother. She did love.. her heart so filled with the both of them.. and finally was this decided.. she no longer had to suffer the aches of seeing a loved one leave. Isnt that what she was doing? Never mind that.. getting out and being with someone she trusted and loved for a while.. made her happy inside, even if her out didn't show it like she used to.
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 6:00 pm
Belial noted her confusion but didn't explain his mention of "practice." He realized she was still young and she'd understand someday. "I've always wanted a family," was all he said. "I'm happy so long as I have you. And I do think having a place to call our own would be a good thing. That way we can keep in touch with our extended families. Speaking of... ummm... " Belial paused and nervously licked his paw. "I probably should speak with your father at some point. No rush as long as you're happy and safe, but your family should know that we've come to an.. understanding." He was really nervous at mentioning the subject both for himself and for her, not knowing how she'd react. It just seemed proper some how and less like he was stealing her away, or that she was running away to him.
((not sure if you want to do the home search and/or family talk in another thread or not. Just let me know. I'm going to be away for a couple days and wanted to get a reply in for you. *hugs*))
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Posted: Wed Aug 20, 2008 9:31 pm
"No... Not yet." She spoke up and looked at him with eyes, as sweet as he was to her. "I just have to...have somewhere to think until the meantime." She nuzzled and purred under him.
"I never thought of a family ... of my own." She thought, though came up with rather blank thoughts. "Shall I help you look after your family." So flying over the concept of what he was telling her. "Your right... extending a paw towards our families.. is needed." Purring then lifting herself up a bit.. waving her tails as the night grew over the lands and she was just about out of her calming zone and rushing in to her nature. The moon.. was half of her life. "Though i will tell you this.. If I find any kits.. around without a home. They WILL be bunking with us. No matter what." It was a warning- she developed that from her father.. though calm when she said it, smooth and yet demanding it be that way.
"Da did that..." She looked away.. then started walking towards the rocks near the water- where a tree had uprooted, and stuck out over the rocks and in to the water directly.. Laying herself there as she closed her eyes. Lowering the head of pride she had.. yet too humble to show this 'pride' and her family linage.
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Posted: Sat Aug 23, 2008 5:50 pm
Belial was torn between amusement over her innocence in certain matters and a growing fear that he'd loose her to someone else someday, that there was still growing for her to do and that she might grow out of her affection for him. There was no way for him to express that fear to her right now. Still she did speak of "us."
Finally he grinned, "You are my family Ren. As for adopting I have no objections, so long as we get some alone time whenever possible. Your father is a very admirable ulaya so how could I object to you following his example?"
He sat down and watched her as she settled herself near the water. She was so lovely. He was completely her's totally surrendered. It would devistate him if she moved on, but her happiness came first. For now though she is mine and my family has grown. Slowly he padded over and sat at her side in a protective mode. He didn't want to disturb her if she was resting or thinking, but he needed to be close.
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Posted: Sat Aug 23, 2008 9:48 pm
"Im not sure.. but admirable or not.. What he has done.. I believe in the gods are looking down over us.. Holding us ever so gently for the things he has done for others. Like I am with Saffron, though he has a family." A smile grew on her face... "I am your family? Heh.. Well you've been my family." Sticking out her tongue- referring to how they used to come together..
As her eyes closed.. she homed in on all her other senses... feeling the vibrations in the ground as he came closer to her.. though. Didn't so much and be with her as she laid. Was this how being together with another was? Is this how Kimi felt with Neme? That always crossed her head.. she wasn't enough. Her ears slicked down her head.. Since he was close enough... and sleeping was more less what she needed from being in.. her other 'form'. So to speak. Close enough...
Just a lil closer...
She needed to feel safe again.. Trust in another again right? As he sat.. She nuzzled her head under his arm..curling up against him, and her tails twirling to curl around his single spaded tail.
Its breaking...
The image once set- Everyone's Princess... Slowly began to crack.. and once it broke? What would happen to her? Captivated by sadness.. and injury of the heart being closed up and locked up tight. Might as well... 'start over anew.' She thought to herself.. Maybe this was what she needed.. Time.
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