Welcome to Gaia! ::

...Huh?



*laughs* If only!

That's an awesome story.

My Ex had a dream about me being pregnant with a litter of kittens and he could feel them purring. If only! *sigh*

The main reason why cloth diapers work the best is because the kid can FEEL THE MESS (unlike commercial disposable diapers). My mom used cloth on my sister and myself. We were potty trained VERY quickly. When it's easy to just s**t and piss in your pants without the feeling of it up next to your body, it's easy to not want to potty train, because you don't have to deal with anything and your mom comes along and changes you.

Of course, you have to clean them by hand, but that's the trade off to waiting five or more years to get your kids using the toilet.

I have the big problem of being really keen to have children, but feeling at the same time that they're so messy and expensive that I don't know if I could handle it. Plus, I don't know what I'm going to do about staying home vs. work, and my husband is just finishing up his BA (I already have mine and am working). The thing is, I'm really good with kids, I pretty much raised both of my younger siblings, and I know all of the things that entails having children (bad and good) but I still want them anyway!!

And it's really annoying because I know that if I had kids, I wouldn't be able to bike everywhere like I do now because I'd have to drive the kid places. And that bothers me, because I don't like driving. I'm just not sure how I can juggle a 24/7 commitment like a child with my life. But I REALLY want to have one....and I have a slight impregnation fetish, plus the scientist at the back of my brain wants to know (at least once) what the feeling of pregnancy and child birth are like.

My best advice? Get on the Pill if you can, and then allow your partner to orgasm inside of you. I never got pregnant when I was on the pill and I did that all the time. It is technically "risky" but I had no problems with it.

Although, now, I can't take the pill anymore because it made my bloodpressure skyrocket and caused me to gain a lot of weight (my blood pressure is normal off the pills and I'm slowly losing weight now). So every time I have sex it's like I'm practically begging my husband to impregnate me, but he promised me that he wouldn't until we both felt logically ready.

The problem is that I don't feel like I'll ever be LOGICALLY ready. *frustration*

What about an IUD?

As far as I'm concerned, if you're both exclusive with one another, and you're both free of STI's then protection against pregnancy is enough. Besides, it's not having sex with another inexperienced person who hasn't had any partners (or only had partners of his or her own young age) that is the problem. It's having sex with people older who have had longer to get infected, as well as people who have had an absurd amount of indiscriminate sex partners.

The chance of someone giving you an STD who was born with it is pretty rare. So really, while the hype of STI's is not a laughing matter, especially once you start dating people older than you when you're in college, it's not quite as big of a deal as people think.

I know, I know, it sounds like I'm telling people to be irresponsible. But I'm just saying be safe, cautious and only do what feels comfortable to you. It's much better to use one or two methods of birth control that feel comfortable than to use none because you feel like you'd have to use EVERY CONCEIVABLE METHOD in order to have truly "safe sex" and it's just too much of a pain.



Yeah. I feel that too. But it's one of those things where I see people have babies all the time who are in worse situations than me, and they have good relationships with their kids while also working or going to school as well! So I figure it won't be impossible, just taxing on my body...which is why I want to have them before I turn 30. Because after that, I'm sure that I'll need all the energy I can get to keep up with everything involving my offspring as well as my husband, my finances, and life in general.

It's scary now, just like it was scary thinking about going away to college. But after a few months or a year of struggling, I am finally starting to feel secure and safe...on my own terms instead of under my parents.

Oh yeah, adamently childfree since the age of 5! I think it might have been those crying doll babies that might have set me off. I got all the little girl toys that seem to be nothing more than those aimed to "train me early" and make me like children..who would have thought they'd repulse me enough to go in the complete opposite direction? wink

But yeah..unless I could call up the "stork" (part time job: pizza dude) with an order for a quiet child well past the age of diapers that happens to be an old soul like I was, there's no chance of there ever being a child in my life. I'll make do with puppies.

"Use a condom" is about as rote memorization as "in 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue"...or "How you feel and where you are, that is when you use estar".

It doesn't mean anything unless you actually use it. And if you're in a situation where condoms are a bad idea (many women are allergic to condoms, and condoms are expensive/annoying to put on), it's better to look at your options and see what's best for you.

Currently, I cannot be on hormonal BC anymore, so if my husband orgasms in me, it's with a condom. Other than that, we don't use condoms until we have to worry about orgasm itself.

Of course, there's a risk of pregnancy, but we've already discussed what we would do "in event of pregnancy" and so we believe that the risks are reasonable compared to the benefits. Besides, my husband has mad control over himself. I've gotten him almost to the edge and he's still maintained his promise to me to not get come inside of me until we really are ready to try and conceive....especially when I'm begging him to do it (because of my stupid fetish) and he's feeling really good. So I'm lucky to have someone like me who can keep his head and maintain control when I'm all dissolving into a mass of pleasuring jelly and earthshattering orgasms.



*shrug*

Going to the doctor doesn't always help. Most of the time, going to the doctor is kind of like having a sounding board. If you're unsure what the problem is, sometimes having someone else take a look at it can shed a lot of light on the problem. It's not just the doctor, it's you being able to listen to the blunt truth by an unbiased person.

When I go to the doctor, I have done research about what is likely the problem. I often ask myself a few questions about the problem that I'm having, especially pertaining to where I am in my cycle, whether or not I'm sick or have a cold or something, my emotional and mental state, my stress level, etc. All of these can be factors that can influence how you feel, and how you can get pleasure.

For example, I can orgasm from penetrative sex every time I have sex with my husband (except in doggie style). However, I did not get like this overnight. It took us over a YEAR of having sex and working through various self-image and other such problems before I could have an orgasm via sex. In fact, I had to "train" myself, little by little, to feel pleasure and even get close to orgasm at all. It was a hard road, but I am reaping all the amazing benefits from it.

One of the things I would suggest (and let me know if this sounds too New Age to you) is to get to know your v****a. Use a speculum and a mirror to examine it. Feel inside of it and notice the difference based on how you feel, the time of the month, etc. Know when your v****a smells "clean" (it's very specifically different, not a bacteria or BO smell), and know when it smells sick. I think that one of the biggest problems is that women don't really understand or know their vaginas. It's like the "little head" joke that men have with their penises, only instead of being friends, most women are like estranged lovers with their vaginas.

It's easier to be horny and wet when you know your body and what it likes. And it's even easier to figure out what's wrong if you know what things are like when it's right.

Just my two cents.

I know that feeling well... boyfriend at uni, myself in a temp job, very little income, moving in with him and some friends next year... baby should be the LAST thing on my list. Yet every time I take a pregnancy test (every three months, just to be sure) I can't help but feel a little disappointed when it's negative. Even though I get s**t-scared when I think I might be.

Phaedra: I'm looking into a change of pill, since I'm positive that's what's causing it. I'll let you know how it goes.