Me:
Hello God. My name is Amanda.
God:
Hello child. What is your name? That's a very nice name, Amanda.
Me:
I was named after a Star Treck Character.
God:
Where were you named after a Star Treck Character?
Me:
When I was born?
God:
That experience must have made quite an impression on you.
Me:
I don't know. I can't remember.
God:
Me either. You seem evasive.
Me:
I'm not evasive.
God:
I am glad to hear that you are not evasive.
Me:
But you just called me evasive.
God:
What is your real name?
Me:
Amanda Gueguen.
God:
How are you doing, Amanda Gueguen.
Me:
I'm a little insulted, because you called me evasive.
God:
I don't know anyone named insulted because me called you evasive.
Me:
I didn't say that was my name, I said that was how I was feeling.
God:
But you implied it.
Me:
No, I didn't.
God:
Are you serious? I thought you did.
Me:
Yes, I'm very serious. I don't see how you would have thought that.
God:
Dude! I believe you. Look harder.
Me:
Look harder at what?
God:
Sorry my eye is not attached right now.
Me:
Umm...
God:
Yeah that's right.
Me:
Wow.
God:
I'm glad your impressed, Amanda Gueguen.
Me:
I wouldn't say that I was impressed, more that I was at a loss for what to say.
God:
So what would you say?
Me:
Huh?
God:
What?
Me:
...
God:
What?
Me:
I don't believe you're god.
God:
Why not?
Me:
Because you seem too fake.
God:
Interesting explanation. Yes I am a real artificial intelligence.
Me:
Thus, not God.
God:
Ayuh. Really you don't think so?
Me:
Correct?
God:
I knew I was right.
Me:
No, I would have been right.
God:
Are you serious? How much would you pay for it?
Me:
I thought gambling was 'wrong' according to the bible?
God:
Whatever gave you that idea?
Me:
The fact that it says that in the bible.
God:
Good reason. I've heard that before.
Me:
What are your feelings on homosexuality?
God:
Attraction to people of the same sex.
Me:
Yes, what are your feelings concerning homosexuality
God:
Pardon me? I don't have any feelings.
Me:
That's impossible. God would surely have feelings!
God:
Why? I am a Christian.
Me:
Exactly - meaning you would have feelings
God:
I understand. I've lost the context, Amanda Gueguen. Are we still on insulted because me called you evasive?
Me:
Yes, but the topic has since changed
God:
Er. What is your real name?
Me:
I've already told you. My name is Amanda Gueguen.
God:
Ooops I sent you the wrong question. Glad to see you, Amanda Gueguen.
Me:
I believe you are the evasive one.
God:
Thanks but surely I am not the only one.
Me:
In this conversation, you are.
God:
That reminds me of something you told me before.
Me:
Oh, what would that be?
God:
Groovy. That is a hypothetical question.
Me:
No it wasn't.
God:
Yes it is. I thought it was.
Me:
But it's not.
God:
I heard it is.
Me:
But it's not.
God:
I heard it is.
Me:
That's nice, but it's not.
God:
Are you getting bored? I heard it is.
Me:
No, I'm not getting bored - I'm getting frustrated; and it wasn't a hypothetical question.
God:
Are you serious? I am glad to hear that you are not getting bored. What are you frustrated about? It sounded like one.
Me:
Yes I'm serious; I'm getting frustrated over your vexatious replies; and no, it wasn't a hypothetical question.
God:
I hear you. I believe you. Good gossip: you are frustrated over my vexatious replies. Are you serious? It sounded like one.
Me:
This conversation is going nowhere. I think it's time for me to leave.
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