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 Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2007 4:52 pm
"Ah! Then I see we have very much in common, darling."
He smiled.
"I have two daughters, and a son. Though one daughter and my son I shall never know, and I was more or less.. the sperm donor."
He flicked his tail, and tried batting away a bee that had landed on him only moments ago.
"My other daughter, Naina, she is a peach though."
He loved Naina, but he and Naina had argued last time she'd seen him. He assumed he just wasnt the fatherly type. He didnt know how to parent, and so he failed, and all his offspring more or less were angered by him.
"As do I. I fail to see the point in talking to anyone of little interest. I'd rather strike out and wander on my own. I seem to have become... a hermit of kinds."
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Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2007 10:03 pm
She frowned slightly as he mentioned have two children that he never properly got to know, and she felt that familiar pang in her heart. She could live with never seeing Eloran again, for that romance had been very short-lived, but to never know that child that she had left behind hurt worse than any pain she had experienced in the world. "I too have a child that I will never know," she said quietly, her eyes fixed on the glimmering blue tones of her hooves, "though I couldn't tell you whether it was a he or a she, or even where it is at the moment. I'm sure it must be with its father, for that is with whom I left it, but I know.. nothing more."
For a moment, she simply stared, then brought her eyes back up to his slowly. She hadn't really meant to tell anyone that, her dirty little secret, but to have someone with such a related story talking about their own misdeeds - well, it just kind of happened to slip out before she could stop it. With such a likeness, though, she was sure he would not hold it against her. She supposed, after all, she just needed to let it be heard.
"Hermit? I'm a hermit by my own right, shut away in the heart of that forest most of the time," she said, nodding with her nose in the direction of the forest line. "I stay there with my sons, Khilan and Cerek. Well, when Cerek can bother to be home, anyway."
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Posted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 5:46 pm
"I wish that it was that way with mine."
He said, fully honest. He heard her story, and knew she was reaching out to him with information she had never truly shared. He understood completely. So damn well.
Nostalgia had been his life.. But he hadnt been enough for her, when he had never truly changed. She had grown tired of his wandering ways.. which she had known about before they had mated.
She had birthed Naina, Trevelyn, and Memory.. He had sired them. Irony would have it that Trev looked exactly like him, and he hated Jean-Claude.
"If my foals had never met me, they'd have no reason to dislike me. As of now, their first impression was much too soon after their mother had left me.. and I had run into her. It was a bitter meeting, and they being obnly foals, will never remember me other than being hateful towqards their mother."
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Posted: Sat Sep 08, 2007 10:28 pm
She shook her head slowly as he spoke again, entirely disagreeing with her words. There was no way that a parent could want that of any of their children. It was his ignorance on the situation that made him feel that way. She could have dealt with her third child hating her if that meant she would know that they were safe, if it meant that she knew them at all. It was the pain of mystery that plagued her more than anything. Sadly, someone who had never experienced it would never know.
"You can't mean that," she said quietly, her deep blue eyes, usually so fierce and sharp, seemed slightly dulled and fairly distant. "It's the worst feeling in the world, not knowing if your child is alive, or safe. I could stand them hating me if it meant I knew they were alive and well, safe, cared for properly." She shook her head sadly, her carefully braided tail flickering slowly behind her, "I wish I had been able to bring the third one with me, but I couldn't."
With a little laugh, she shook her head, glancing back up to him with a sort of sad amusement plastered on her pretty face. "I don't know why I'm even talking about this - I don't confide in anyone, certainly not Soquili I've known only for a handful of minutes." She smirked, wondering what Khilan would think of this sudden spurt of social outgoing.
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Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 8:49 am
Jean Claudes usually charming, calm demeanor, took on a bit of a sad vibe. His eyes lowered to the ground as he flicked his tail back and forth, trying hard as hell not to lower his head.
"No.. I suppose I dont wish that.. But you have to trust the one you once loved.. Trust that they will care for the baby.. For I know Nostalgia wouldnt ever leave the foals if she didnt think they were ready."
He had heard Nos had gone back to her lands.. Only to return years away, if she ever returned at all. Naina had told him that, and Naina had finally met and bonded with her mother after almost a year. It had changed Naina, she was happier, and her heart carried less of an ache.
His lifted his gaze, looking at the other Soquili. Giving a sad bemused smile.
"We tell things to others, who unedrsstand. When someone understands the pain you are going through, it doesnt matter if you've known them forever, or for minutes. The effect is the same, and we all look for someone to share the dirty history of ourselves with."
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Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 9:34 am
"Well, I suppose that's a good a way as any to look at it," she said quietly, the beads in her tail glimmering slightly as she flicked it back and forth behind her mocha form. "I know Eloran wouldn't let anything happen to our child," she shifted her feet, glancing off at the horizon, in the direction she had last seen Eloran. "It still doesn't completely get rid of that fear, though. There will always be a hundred scenarios I can run through my head of Eloran getting hurt and losing the child, or the child getting hurt where Eloran couldn't stop it," she chuckled, shaking her head softly, "it's like my own personal punishment for leaving."
As he spoke again, however, she couldn't resist the small smile that spread over her maw. These days, she wasn't as unkind as she had been a year or two ago. Raising two sons had given her patience, though she would never be at ease with certain types of Soquili and would never get along with the childish ones. However, Jean-Claude was right in this aspect, she confided in him because he had been through a similar situation. "Well, I suppose that is very true. I needed someone that knew what I was going through, and I suppose you would know better than anyone." She smirked to herself, glancing back towards him. What was her luck, finding someone who had almost gone through the same exact experience?
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Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 9:44 am
He smiled, catching the slight smile that had branded her lips. It was small, but it was the biggest smile she had given since they'd started talking.
If there was anything Jean Claude wasnt, it was childish. Sometimes he had his D+D moments, but those were so very rare they hardly counted. He pawed at the dirt, playing with it under his hooves.
Yes. Being in the same situation was what made him the prime candidate for talking.
He hadnt told her that he never truly confided in anyone, and she was learning his history damn fast. So it was also he, the needed the talking. He, that needed the company.
But he wasnt going to dwell on that. He was a stallion, he should have been able to stomach the pain. a mare..a mother.. simply did not need to go through that.
"Those thoughts will always plague you.. And maybe one day.. You'll meet this little one you've never met. I wasnt supposed to meet my other two, I ran into them by chance. Sometimes, when things are meant to be.. they happen."
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Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 10:37 am
She smiled, yet again, in his direction with a little bit of a smirk mixed into it. She had definitely not planned for this to happen this way, but she couldn't say that she regretted talking to him. It felt like a small fraction of that weight had been lifted off of her shoulders, simply by telling him and letting it be put out in the open. Still, as good as this talk had been for her, the sun was settling low on the horizon and she needed to head back in the direction of home before Khilan began to worry. He was such a silly boy sometimes.
"It's been lovely talking to you, Jean-Claude, but I need to get home now so that my son doesn't worry over me being gone out too long," she dipped her head as she spoke, a sort of dismissing bow. Then she simply turned, smiling, and began to head in the direction of the forest. "Maybe I'll see you again soon, yeah?" she called back, her smile lingering as she glanced over her shoulder. Then, with a little leap, she disappeared into the barrier of the woods.
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