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Uhm, do you have some kind of source to back that up?

I can cite two extremely well known concubines. Avraham's wife's handmaid, Hagar, mother of Ishmael. Then, after Hagar was banished from the household, and after Sarah died, Avraham took a lover/mistress/concubine named Q'turah and had SEVERAL children by her. This isn't midrash, folks, this is Biblical text, right there in the p'shat (plain text, rather than hidden meanings behind the text).

A concubine is essentially the same as a wife, but doesn't have the benefit of a k'tubah, a marriage contract. While it's halachically acceptable for a man to take a wife, and then a second wife or a concubine IF the first wife accepts the secondary woman/women, it's "on hold" in Ashkenazi communities.

Okay, point of interest. I'm attending an Ashkenazi synagogue right now because that's what's available in my neighborhood, but I consider myself somewhere between Mizrachi, Teimani, and Sephardi in practice. One of my best friends is a Sephardi woman who's extremely knowledgeable, as is her husband. Their k'tubah states clearly that if S wants to take a second wife or concubine, that A has the right of refusal -- she can say, "No second wife/concubine at all," or she can say "Sure, a second wife, but not this woman, choose someone else." There's no halachic (Jewish legal) problem with this at all, for the non-Ashkenazi community. And while the US has laws that prevent one from taking more than one spouse in a civil sense, one CAN get a religious document of marriage or concubinage. It has religious binding power (affects how the husband and the wife/wives/concubine/concubines interact), but no secular/civil binding power (it doesn't grant any tax breaks for the wives or concubines other than the first wife).

He saw her naked taking a shower, and made a mistake.

That wasn't a joke, it really happened. Fact is stranger than fiction sometimes!

Though if you look deeper into it, there was more than just lust behind what David did. I won't go into the details, but despite the fact that it may have been a mistake, the sages say: "Whomsoever says David sinned, is a fool".

Completely my mistake then; I apologize. Thank you very much for correcting me- I need to learn a lot more than I thought. xp

Sorry Slam. sweatdrop

Still, in general, this does not mean doing it in the first place is OK, even if you can clear it up later.

Just because the maid can clean up the mess she made doesn't mean she can let her dog poo all over the bedroom and decide to clean up the mess later (yeah, I couldn't find a better way to put it, huh? xp ).

One who says "I shall sin, then repent", will have a very hard time to wipe his slate clean. G-d forgives, but not if you take advantage of his forgiveness.

Exactly, Kingpin. What's in the past is in the past, as long as you don't do it again. Repentence is the key. And yes, I've asked my far more knowledgeable friend, and she says that the pre-wedding mikvah does help. Also, the wedding is known as "Yom Kippur Katan," a mini-day of atonement, for the bride and groom (and to a lesser extent, some say, all those present for the wedding). Mikvah plus the marriage ceremony equals a clean slate. Not if you intentionally went out and did something, knowing that it'd all be okay thanks to mikvah and wedding, of course. But if you did something, then regretted it sincerely, prayed, gave to charity, and then truly repented to the point of not repeating the error when given a chance to repeat it... then, yes. All is well.

And as always, a final disclaimer: If you were sexually violated, G*D forbid, YOU aren't the one who sinned, so you have nothing from which to repent or apologize.

Well I figured you were doing something of the sort. I'm pretty defensive when it comes to discussing things on the internet.

Sorry about that chap. blaugh