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 Posted: Fri Apr 08, 2011 10:13 pm
Medeus I think you had a fair point in that everybody has qualities that stay the same throughout life, but I don't think it's fair to narrow the answer to "who am I?" down to that one facet of what people are made of. First of all, how would those consistent personality traits ever make themselves evident without other people to experience them with in the first place? It's LIKE impossible to set oneself completely apart from society and say that they're the same in both settings. And so much of people depend on their Past, and it's impossible to have a Past without others. How many people would define themselves as anything other than what their Peers think of them at any given time? How many high schoolers see themselves as the Kid who eats alone at lunch, or the Kid who hangs out with the Band geeks, or the Kid who grew up without much of a family and clung to the one best friend who never left his/her side? It can be a self-fulfilling cycle of "I am X, and they see me as X, therefore I must be X, and I should probably act like X". That interaction with our environments becomes a part of our personality reflexes as far as how we interact with others, and even how we dialogue to ourselves. This is going to keep me up for a while...
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Posted: Fri Apr 08, 2011 10:19 pm
Medeus LPS, I can't stop thinking about that chat we had awhile ago about Identity, and who we are, and how other people affect our personalities. lol I'm not trying to rock old boats, but my thoughts persist beyond my own intended navigation. I think you had a fair point in that everybody has qualities that stay the same throughout life, but I don't think it's fair to narrow the answer to "who am I?" down to that one facet of what people are made of. First of all, how would those consistent personality traits ever make themselves evident without other people to experience them with in the first place? It's LIKE impossible to set oneself completely apart from society and say that they're the same in both settings. And so much of people depend on their Past, and it's impossible to have a Past without others. How many people would define themselves as anything other than what their Peers think of them at any given time? How many high schoolers see themselves as the Kid who eats alone at lunch, or the Kid who hangs out with the Band geeks, or the Kid who grew up without much of a family and clung to the one best friend who never left his/her side? It can be a self-fulfilling cycle of "I am X, and they see me as X, therefore I must be X, and I should probably act like X". That interaction with our environments becomes a part of our personality reflexes as far as how we interact with others, and even how we dialogue to ourselves. It's true, some things about yourself you can only experience through other people. That's why I think so many people find it so hard to define who they are - who you seem to be changes from person to person depending on what the interaction provokes in you.
As for defining oneself by what others think of you, I don't really think that's anybody's fault. I think it's something taught to us from a young age - for example, we are taught to behave differently around people we believe to be important; being on our 'best behavior' to impress someone is something that is taught to be acceptable, be it a job interview, or the first time meeting the parents, or holidays that call for family dinners - I think a lot of people have been conditioned to find it perfectly acceptable to suppress parts of their own personalities to meet the social criteria for the situation. if this were the case, it'd make perfect sense for the question to be so hard to answer; so many people spend so much time being someone they think they're expected to be that they lose touch with who they are. Medeus Today I heard a story about a man who jumped off a bridge. He left a note as his home saying, "I'm going to the bridge. If One person smiles at me on the way there, I won't kill myself". His life ended that day. Because nobody smiled at him. If one person had smiled at him, he would have lived. He only needed One smile from another living, breathing, caring person to make his life worth living. I know this example can't be generalized to the whole of society, but it's a point to ponder; When pushed to the edge of our own existence, it came down to a smile. That was the line. If that's where the edge is, how much more can the people closest to us change who we are on a whole?
Well, I don't think the smile would have changed him, as much as I think it would have changed his mind. I think who he is would have stayed the same. Maybe he would have gained a wonderful friend, though, who could have inspired him to further explore that.
Oh, yeah, how do you define the question we're discussing? Like, what do you mean when you talk about 'who you are'? To me, I think who you are is best determined by what you love, what you're afraid of, and which of those things motivates the majority of your thoughts and decisions. This is why I don't think anyone else can answer that question for you or has the right to tell you who you are; only you know why you do the things you do.
So, I think the people we meet can encourage or deter us to influence the decisions we make, and in that way have an effect on which part of who we are we allow to show through, but I think that in the end, no matter who you're with, who you've met, or where you are, you're always you.
These are all just the musings of a stoner, though. I don't really know anything for sure and these are just my opinions.
(I've gotten into the habit of saying that when I talk about these things in places other than MSN, in case people who don't agree decide to stomp on my sandcastle. xd )
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 12:02 pm
lol I like how you're asking me to answer what "who am I" means to me...Irony! scream
Let me use a metaphor: People are like Stone rolling down a mountainside. Right before it's pushed off the top (born?) it's raw, rough, and full of potential. It has no experience, but it has the potential to become something more beautiful than the natural beginning.
While it's rolling down the mountain, it collides with everything it comes in contact with. Chunks fly off, while some other matter is added onto it. It has the ability to impact everything it rushes past, even, while quite possibly never being aware. By the end, it's potential may or may not have been reached, but it's different from where it started, and it's still beautiful because of it. All the painful chunks taken away, and healing things added onto it have turned it into something else.
Maybe the better question than, "who am I?" is, "Where am I?": Have I reached my potential? Or am I still rolling down the hill? Have I just started, or am I almost done? How has this chunk gone change what I am? How have I affected everything I rolled past? What does this surface here mean about me? What does this crack mean about me?
It's such a big question.....
What I, personally, mean by the question "who am I?" is encompassed by "Where did I start, and where will I end, and what will happen to me in between?" Questions literally too big for anybody to answer for themselves and too big to answer in one lifetime.
What you were talking about is Content; "What am I made OF?" Per the metaphor, "what sort of rock am I?"
In the end, it doesn't really answer too many questions....It's something, but there's so much more too look at, If you understand my metaphor.
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 12:04 pm
Rhed King This is going to keep me up for a while... is that a good thing or a bad thing? These are the things I think about when I'm laying in bed, taking showers, and driving places. My head is crazy...@_@
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 12:29 pm
Medeus lol I like how you're asking me to answer what "who am I" means to me...Irony! scream Let me use a metaphor: People are like Stone rolling down a mountainside. Right before it's pushed off the top (born?) it's raw, rough, and full of potential. It has no experience, but it has the potential to become something more beautiful than the natural beginning. While it's rolling down the mountain, it collides with everything it comes in contact with. Chunks fly off, while some other matter is added onto it. It has the ability to impact everything it rushes past, even, while quite possibly never being aware. By the end, it's potential may or may not have been reached, but it's different from where it started, and it's still beautiful because of it. All the painful chunks taken away, and healing things added onto it have turned it into something else. Maybe the better question than, "who am I?" is, "Where am I?": Have I reached my potential? Or am I still rolling down the hill? Have I just started, or am I almost done? How has this chunk gone change what I am? How have I affected everything I rolled past? What does this surface here mean about me? What does this crack mean about me? It's such a big question..... What I, personally, mean by the question "who am I?" is encompassed by "Where did I start, and where will I end, and what will happen to me in between?" Questions literally too big for anybody to answer for themselves and too big to answer in one lifetime. What you were talking about is Content; "What am I made OF?" Per the metaphor, "what sort of rock am I?" In the end, it doesn't really answer too many questions....It's something, but there's so much more too look at, If you understand my metaphor. Hm. I agree with you, but I don't exactly know what you mean by potential. One person could have become very financially successful and one of the most powerful people in the world, but spent the majority of their life alone and unhappy about it. Another could have been the poorest, laziest sonofabitch and never amounted to anything as far as material success goes, perhaps even despite high expectations to the contrary, but spent their life doing what made them happy and enjoying the company of people they cared about. Who met their potential in the end?
I don't really like the rock metaphor though. It makes me feel like we're just rolling through life, ******** up everything we collide with because we're going too fast to notice our surroundings. sad I'd rather be a bird; appreciating the world from a distance, taking nothing but the worms I need to live, leaving nothing but a pretty little song everywhere I go. Never hurt anyone.
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 12:29 pm
Medeus Rhed King This is going to keep me up for a while... is that a good thing or a bad thing? These are the things I think about when I'm laying in bed, taking showers, and driving places. My head is crazy...@_@ Generally speaking I just think things over while im asleep. But yeah idle times like that also work out. I think this type of thing is twofold. It is impossible to look at someone's characteristics and say that they have not been influenced by their environment; but it's the way that our environment changes us that makes us all unique at the same time. regarding the stone example, it's not entirely up to fate/gravity. We can guide ourselves in some respects. But that doesnt mean environment isnt important to observe. In fact, environment might be even more important. The really interesting thought is: what kind of person do you have to be, to decide that your environment doesn't affect of who you are? And compounding on that; did you start that way? How much did your environment change you so that you would believe you were independent of your environment. Conversely. Do some people just assume their environment affects them more than it actually does? Does that assumption actually force their belief to be true?
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 12:45 pm
Cabron LaSwan Medeus lol I like how you're asking me to answer what "who am I" means to me...Irony! scream Let me use a metaphor: People are like Stone rolling down a mountainside. Right before it's pushed off the top (born?) it's raw, rough, and full of potential. It has no experience, but it has the potential to become something more beautiful than the natural beginning. While it's rolling down the mountain, it collides with everything it comes in contact with. Chunks fly off, while some other matter is added onto it. It has the ability to impact everything it rushes past, even, while quite possibly never being aware. By the end, it's potential may or may not have been reached, but it's different from where it started, and it's still beautiful because of it. All the painful chunks taken away, and healing things added onto it have turned it into something else. Maybe the better question than, "who am I?" is, "Where am I?": Have I reached my potential? Or am I still rolling down the hill? Have I just started, or am I almost done? How has this chunk gone change what I am? How have I affected everything I rolled past? What does this surface here mean about me? What does this crack mean about me? It's such a big question..... What I, personally, mean by the question "who am I?" is encompassed by "Where did I start, and where will I end, and what will happen to me in between?" Questions literally too big for anybody to answer for themselves and too big to answer in one lifetime. What you were talking about is Content; "What am I made OF?" Per the metaphor, "what sort of rock am I?" In the end, it doesn't really answer too many questions....It's something, but there's so much more too look at, If you understand my metaphor. Hm. I agree with you, but I don't exactly know what you mean by potential. One person could have become very financially successful and one of the most powerful people in the world, but spent the majority of their life alone and unhappy about it. Another could have been the poorest, laziest sonofabitch and never amounted to anything as far as material success goes, perhaps even despite high expectations to the contrary, but spent their life doing what made them happy and enjoying the company of people they cared about. Who met their potential in the end?
I don't really like the rock metaphor though. It makes me feel like we're just rolling through life, ******** up everything we collide with because we're going too fast to notice our surroundings. sad I'd rather be a bird; appreciating the world from a distance, taking nothing but the worms I need to live, leaving nothing but a pretty little song everywhere I go. Never hurt anyone. Concerning the metaphor, maybe it's the difference between a rough stone and a carved statue. But even then, it's hard to say.... But pragmatically, it's probably impossible to say for ourselves. Maybe it's a state of mind that recognizes "I am what I am, and I'm meant to be this way".... Personally, I'm convinced that God is the only one who knows what Potential is, and when it's been reached. After all, if a stone is made by God, pushed down a hill by God, and watched over by God, doesn't God have the final say on when it's intended potential has been reached? What rose can take a step outside of itself to say, "I am not beautiful"? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and perfection must compared to what is perfect; The first of which is a reinforcement for my earlier point; we need each other to define ourselves accurately. Lol I don't like to think about things in terms of "good and bad" because that's so relative. Who is the stone to say, "I shouldn't have knocked that tree over!" when the tree needed to Go so that the Flowers could take their place? Maybe you should be going around ******** more s**t up instead if uselessly flitting around in the air while the massive rocks are rolling by, ******** s**t up, beyond your influence? DAMMIT LPS! xD But I digress.... You are very much correct Rhed. Beyond the Metaphor, we have the ability to choose for ourselves where we go; what we can't choose necessarily is where we end up, and what's gonna be waiting for us when we get there, eh? Also, you've just reached the epitome of the "Nature vs. Nurture" debate among psychologists and scientists alike. Classic "Chicken or the Egg?" question. It's probably an intrinsic combination of the two; another reason why it's almost impossible to answer for ourselves "Who am I?"
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 12:56 pm
Rhed King Medeus Rhed King This is going to keep me up for a while... is that a good thing or a bad thing? These are the things I think about when I'm laying in bed, taking showers, and driving places. My head is crazy...@_@ Generally speaking I just think things over while im asleep. But yeah idle times like that also work out. I think this type of thing is twofold. It is impossible to look at someone's characteristics and say that they have not been influenced by their environment; but it's the way that our environment changes us that makes us all unique at the same time. regarding the stone example, it's not entirely up to fate/gravity. We can guide ourselves in some respects. But that doesnt mean environment isnt important to observe. In fact, environment might be even more important. The really interesting thought is: what kind of person do you have to be, to decide that your environment doesn't affect of who you are? And compounding on that; did you start that way? How much did your environment change you so that you would believe you were independent of your environment. Conversely. Do some people just assume their environment affects them more than it actually does? Does that assumption actually force their belief to be true? I think that, ultimately, you choose which parts of your environment you allow to impact you. Some people get really angry over really small things like, say, the debit machine being broken at the grocery checkout or something, rant and rave endlessly and call the cashier all sorts of really unfair things, blame the store for the people their temper tantrum held up when they leave, and then grumble when they get home about how much of a headache incompetent people make things. (My mom does this. xd ) Some people shrug, put their s**t back in the basket, move to another lane, and get on with their day. While I think environment can have a huge impact on a person, that it's never the deciding factor, and despite that, too many people use it as an excuse to justify behaviors they would probably frown upon if they saw them in someone else.
That said, I think sometimes your environment affects you in ways you can't help, either; like, for example, being around someone who is clearly in a bad mood is probably going to make you feel a little awkward, even if you had nothing to do with it.
I don't really think how your environment affects you is as important to personal growth as how you choose to react to it, though, and what you learn from your choice.
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 1:03 pm
The entire realm of existence is a chain reaction of bad things happening to some people and good things happening to others. By putting yourself outside the realm of disorder, I expect you would have a very boring life.
without a sense of what is bad, there is no longer a concept for what can be good, as their is nothing to compare it to. The only thing left is an event.
Following this concept, we reach a base level, where both the theorized heaven and hell are equally good and bad. The only difference is whether you begin your eternity by hating it or loving it, and then again, what point is the beginning when its an eternity, and that beginning is infinitely small.
A bit of a tangent, but...
Medeus, you seem to be right that this is just something that we can't define in this light.
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 1:04 pm
Cabron LaSwan Rhed King Medeus Rhed King This is going to keep me up for a while... is that a good thing or a bad thing? These are the things I think about when I'm laying in bed, taking showers, and driving places. My head is crazy...@_@ Generally speaking I just think things over while im asleep. But yeah idle times like that also work out. I think this type of thing is twofold. It is impossible to look at someone's characteristics and say that they have not been influenced by their environment; but it's the way that our environment changes us that makes us all unique at the same time. regarding the stone example, it's not entirely up to fate/gravity. We can guide ourselves in some respects. But that doesnt mean environment isnt important to observe. In fact, environment might be even more important. The really interesting thought is: what kind of person do you have to be, to decide that your environment doesn't affect of who you are? And compounding on that; did you start that way? How much did your environment change you so that you would believe you were independent of your environment. Conversely. Do some people just assume their environment affects them more than it actually does? Does that assumption actually force their belief to be true? I think that, ultimately, you choose which parts of your environment you allow to impact you. Some people get really angry over really small things like, say, the debit machine being broken at the grocery checkout or something, rant and rave endlessly and call the cashier all sorts of really unfair things, blame the store for the people their temper tantrum held up when they leave, and then grumble when they get home about how much of a headache incompetent people make things. (My mom does this. xd ) Some people shrug, put their s**t back in the basket, move to another lane, and get on with their day. While I think environment can have a huge impact on a person, that it's never the deciding factor, and despite that, too many people use it as an excuse to justify behaviors they would probably frown upon if they saw them in someone else.
That said, I think sometimes your environment affects you in ways you can't help, either; like, for example, being around someone who is clearly in a bad mood is probably going to make you feel a little awkward, even if you had nothing to do with it.
I don't really think how your environment affects you is as important to personal growth as how you choose to react to it, though, and what you learn from your choice. Exactly....See how complex this can get? xD Excellent point though. Your reactions are a part of what defines you. Though i think you should take into consideration the ramifications if said environmental stimulus were absent. So instead of just, "this happened, and I chose to react this way, therefore I am ____", There's also the aspect of, "This did NOT happen, so I don't know How I would react..." Or more simply, "This did NOT happen, therefore I was NOT affected in this way".... Potential is something that a lot of people seem to ignore, but I think it's integral.
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 1:14 pm
Rhed King The entire realm of existence is a chain reaction of bad things happening to some people and good things happening to others. By putting yourself outside the realm of disorder, I expect you would have a very boring life. without a sense of what is bad, there is no longer a concept for what can be good, as their is nothing to compare it to. The only thing left is an event. Following this concept, we reach a base level, where both the theorized heaven and hell are equally good and bad. The only difference is whether you begin your eternity by hating it or loving it, and then again, what point is the beginning when its an eternity, and that beginning is infinitely small. A bit of a tangent, but... Medeus, you seem to be right that this is just something that we can't define in this light. I'm glad I could shed a little light for ya. razz lol This is where I'm forced to interject my beliefs on that matter: You're right. Without a standard, 'Good' and 'Evil' are completely moot. Who's to say whats good and bad? BUT there is still evidence of Good and Evil in the world, isn't there? Obviously, it's evil when a woman is raped by a madman with no conscious. Obviously, it's evil when innocent people are shot in a hold-up. Obviously, it's good when a boy with a million better things to do decides to volunteer and help out at a Homeless shelter. Obviously it's good when somebody returns a lost drivers license or wallet. I think it's even OBVIOUSLY good when you Smile at a stranger, or compliment somebody you've never met before. To me "Good" and "Evil" are only pragmatic when you put God into the equation. God is the standard of Good, and therefore everything that is not from God is Evil. The definition of Heaven means that after life we go to Join God, and all those who aren't With God are in Hell, and that's the standard. Personally, it's the only way that "good" and "evil" make sense without either side becoming moot. People can (and will) justify everything they do to make it sound good, so it's not fair for any of us to decide what's good and bad; but if God is the standard, than God decides what is Good and what is Evil, and that's what we respond to when we see evidence of good things in a world where 'good' is relative. Also, please don't take this as "I'm judging you ******** for not being christians" lol cuz thats not how I roll. Just sharing my heart with you to take or leave as you will. 3nodding
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 1:37 pm
Medeus Concerning the metaphor, maybe it's the difference between a rough stone and a carved statue. But even then, it's hard to say.... But pragmatically, it's probably impossible to say for ourselves. Maybe it's a state of mind that recognizes "I am what I am, and I'm meant to be this way".... Personally, I'm convinced that God is the only one who knows what Potential is, and when it's been reached. After all, if a stone is made by God, pushed down a hill by God, and watched over by God, doesn't God have the final say on when it's intended potential has been reached? What rose can take a step outside of itself to say, "I am not beautiful"? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and perfection must compared to what is perfect; The first of which is a reinforcement for my earlier point; we need each other to define ourselves accurately. Lol I don't like to think about things in terms of "good and bad" because that's so relative. Who is the stone to say, "I shouldn't have knocked that tree over!" when the tree needed to Go so that the Flowers could take their place? Maybe you should be going around ******** more s**t up instead if uselessly flitting around in the air while the massive rocks are rolling by, ******** s**t up, beyond your influence? DAMMIT LPS! xD But I digress.... You are very much correct Rhed. Beyond the Metaphor, we have the ability to choose for ourselves where we go; what we can't choose necessarily is where we end up, and what's gonna be waiting for us when we get there, eh? Also, you've just reached the epitome of the "Nature vs. Nurture" debate among psychologists and scientists alike. Classic "Chicken or the Egg?" question. It's probably an intrinsic combination of the two; another reason why it's almost impossible to answer for ourselves "Who am I?" And again, I agree with you but have to ask you another question. Who or what is God to you? I believe that God is thought - the one thing that makes us unique despite all having been born the same species, the consciousness that exists in all of us, the creative urge that drives us to build skyscrapers and paint masterpieces and write marvelous fantasies. I believe that, not our physical appearance, is what the Bible meant about us being made in God's image; while I feel that a lot of animals have exhibited creative inclinations, we alone have the power to turn our ideas into material things. Opposable thumbs are OP, umad food chain?
I didn't say that the stone ******** up things was good or bad; I know that destruction can only lead to creation. I just don't think everyone needs to be a stone. I think it's okay if some people want to be the flowers that pop up in the stone's wake, or if some people just want to watch and entertain from afar, without feeling any need to interfere. Me, I don't wanna be the stone.
(Also, I disagree with you about how we can't choose where we end up. I think everything we do in the present is karmically gonna come back to us in time, and that we can directly influence whether we will receive happiness or unhappiness through which of the two we decide to give to others. Now while this probably won't decide where we physically end up, I think it will have a huge effect on where we mentally and emotionally end up, which is really all I think matters.)
Also, nurture vs nature in a nutshell is pretty much learned behavior vs instinctive behavior, isn't it? I think that you choose which behaviors to adapt from your environment in the interests of what you instinctively want; while your nurture may shape you, your nature determines how, when, and how much it does.
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 1:38 pm
Medeus lol This is where I'm forced to interject my beliefs on that matter: You're right. Without a standard, 'Good' and 'Evil' are completely moot. Who's to say whats good and bad? BUT there is still evidence of Good and Evil in the world, isn't there? Obviously, it's evil when a woman is raped by a madman with no conscious. Obviously, it's evil when innocent people are shot in a hold-up. Obviously, it's good when a boy with a million better things to do decides to volunteer and help out at a Homeless shelter. Obviously it's good when somebody returns a lost drivers license or wallet. I think it's even OBVIOUSLY good when you Smile at a stranger, or compliment somebody you've never met before. To me "Good" and "Evil" are only pragmatic when you put God into the equation. God is the standard of Good, and therefore everything that is not from God is Evil. The definition of Heaven means that after life we go to Join God, and all those who aren't With God are in Hell, and that's the standard. Personally, it's the only way that "good" and "evil" make sense without either side becoming moot. People can (and will) justify everything they do to make it sound good, so it's not fair for any of us to decide what's good and bad; but if God is the standard, than God decides what is Good and what is Evil, and that's what we respond to when we see evidence of good things in a world where 'good' is relative. Certainly you can define things as being inherently good and evil, and you are right, hell is seen as evil, heaven is seen as good. I see what you are saying. I guess what I was referring to was the person experiencing the good or evil. If you have one man in hell, forced to do backbreaking labor and live in pain for an eternity; and another man in heaven who will live as how he would define perfectly; my suggestion is that they will both become numb to how they are living eventually. To an onlooker, it is easy to see that one is being tortured, and the other living in the grandest way possible. And that onlooker can feel bad for the tortured man and feel good (or maybe be envious) of the happy man. But with no positives to look forward to, and no negatives to fear, don't both men, in their own minds, eventually feel the same?
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 1:48 pm
I am a strong believer in the God of the Bible; the same God of Isaac, and Moses, and later John the Baptist, and Jesus Christ. I believe that God is the creator of Everything, and that he created us all as individuals because he loved is that much. I believe that God is a being totally outside our realm of existence, who loves to hang out with us everyday, sometimes beyond our knowledge. God is the maker of everything, therefore he is the one who decides what comes from Him (good) and what comes from Us (more often then not, Evil).
lol That's my spiel....I guess I could keep going, but you get the point.
xD Which is why I don't like using Metaphors for fear that people read into them too much and take it as the only metaphor thats supposed to explain everything about everything. I know that's not what you're doing, but you know...Don't read into it too much. I could use a million different metaphors to show different things, but the Stone metaphor I use to get the that one point across.
That's true too. You reap what you sow.....But once again, don't read into the metaphor too much. razz
Pretty much yeah that. Scientists are debating the power of Genetics vs. the power of what we Learn in our environment over our personalities/behavior patterns. It's an interesting discussion.
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Posted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 1:57 pm
Medeus This is where I'm forced to interject my beliefs on that matter: You're right. Without a standard, 'Good' and 'Evil' are completely moot. Who's to say whats good and bad? BUT there is still evidence of Good and Evil in the world, isn't there? Obviously, it's evil when a woman is raped by a madman with no conscious. Obviously, it's evil when innocent people are shot in a hold-up. Obviously, it's good when a boy with a million better things to do decides to volunteer and help out at a Homeless shelter. Obviously it's good when somebody returns a lost drivers license or wallet. I think it's even OBVIOUSLY good when you Smile at a stranger, or compliment somebody you've never met before. I don't exactly agree with this. I mean, I don't agree with rape, but usually it's about power; instead of being a 'madman with no conscience', he could be a very frustrated person who feels powerless in his own life and needed to feel like he was in control of something just to make him feel like it was worth going on - I'm not saying I condone getting that from a helpless woman who doesn't want to give it to him, just that it doesn't necessarily mean that he's insane and incapable of empathy.
I don't believe that people have the capacity to be inherently malicious or spiteful for no good reason; I just think they sometimes fail to explore their own feelings thoroughly and end up blaming their unhappiness on others - others they then feel deserve to be punished for doing this to them. I'm not saying that either the rapist or the shooter blamed their unhappiness on the people they hurt directly (I'd venture that people who do things like that are often lashing back at society in general), just that actions like those are usually born from a desire to spread or return the hurt that they're feeling, and not a "hey I think I'm gonna go shoot some people today just to be a d**k, and then tonight I'm gonna beat my wife and let Gaston drink me under the table" kind of mentality. I really don't think there are any 'villains' in the world, just poorly-thought-out decisions and dismissed or unspoken reasons.
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