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 Posted: Tue Aug 19, 2008 12:03 am
Freedom Fire Me and my boyfriend finally had sex . . . but it didn't last long. It's not that he came too soon, he didn't come at all . . . he lost his erection a few minutes in because he was so nervous. How do I help him relax so his erection lasts long enough to finish? Fran gave some really good tips, and I'm going to add my opinion with Master's to say that it might just come with time. The very first time I had sex, my then-boyfriend lost his erection twice before he was able to keep it up long enough to penetrate me. And while he lasted a long time (an hour I think?), he never came. Neither did I, actually. xd But I think on his case, it was largely due to nerves. I was his first and he was my first, and we both just sort of went for it. Just keep trying would be my advice. Don't worry so much about "doing it right" as just having fun and enjoying it with your boyfriend. smile As Fran said, keep touching him and keeping contact so he stays stimulated. Ask him if there's anything he'd like to try or anything he'd like you to do to him. You guys can share oral sex, there's manual stimulation, food play, and so on. Lots of ideas! 3nodding
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Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 3:53 pm
Ugh. I've taken to hanging out in Life Issues recently, and I'm getting really disgusted at how many people think that a girl should bleed her first time, and that it should be painful, and that the v****a needs to stretch out. No, no, and NO. If it's painful, you're doing it wrong. If it's bleeding, you've probably torn something. The v****a will accommodate whatever is in it and spring back like elastic. I want people to stop feeding this misinformation and lies and start TEACHING this stuff in schools!
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Posted: Wed Oct 01, 2008 2:26 pm
Fran Salaska Ugh. I've taken to hanging out in Life Issues recently, and I'm getting really disgusted at how many people think that a girl should bleed her first time, and that it should be painful, and that the v****a needs to stretch out. No, no, and NO. If it's painful, you're doing it wrong. If it's bleeding, you've probably torn something. The v****a will accommodate whatever is in it and spring back like elastic. I want people to stop feeding this misinformation and lies and start TEACHING this stuff in schools! Misinformation and s**t like that was exactly why I started this guild. sweatdrop Sounds like I need to go take a look through LI again.
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Posted: Thu Oct 02, 2008 3:57 am
Nikolita Fran Salaska Ugh. I've taken to hanging out in Life Issues recently, and I'm getting really disgusted at how many people think that a girl should bleed her first time, and that it should be painful, and that the v****a needs to stretch out. No, no, and NO. If it's painful, you're doing it wrong. If it's bleeding, you've probably torn something. The v****a will accommodate whatever is in it and spring back like elastic. I want people to stop feeding this misinformation and lies and start TEACHING this stuff in schools! Misinformation and s**t like that was exactly why I started this guild. sweatdrop Sounds like I need to go take a look through LI again. Yeah. D: There was one person INSISTING I was wrong because sex was painful for her for six months and her doctor told her she was fine. x.x Fortunately Fizzlesticks hangs out in LI a lot to tell people how sex is supposed to be. : D I pointed out that the v****a does not stretch, because then women who have slept with big penises could never go smaller, because they would be 'stretched' for big ones. Surely common sense would dictate that vaginas which stretch out make no biological sense. Is there a way to get more sources? I'll scan these pages but it'd be nice to just have some on tap. Maybe another sticky specifically for that information?
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Posted: Thu Oct 02, 2008 1:05 pm
What do you mean? What kind of sources/information are you looking for?
*confused whee *
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Posted: Mon Oct 06, 2008 6:55 am
Nikolita What do you mean? What kind of sources/information are you looking for? *confused whee * >.< I'm very bad at making myself clear. Sources that say when a girl's hymen might break, that sex shouldn't be painful, that you might bleed or you might not, that sort of thing.
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Posted: Mon Oct 06, 2008 9:17 am
Fran Salaska Nikolita What do you mean? What kind of sources/information are you looking for? *confused whee * >.< I'm very bad at making myself clear. Sources that say when a girl's hymen might break, that sex shouldn't be painful, that you might bleed or you might not, that sort of thing. You're right that these questions just keep coming up in LI. That can get pretty frustrating. Rather than typing out a new response to each, I'd suggest copying and pasting. xp Something like: Fizzlesticks IF SEX HURTS, YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG!
(How to enjoy painfree sex everytime, especially the first time!)Many women experience unnecessary pain during sex. For the vast majority, sex does not have to be, and should not be painful. There are many, many things you can do to ensure pain-free sex, and if they do not work, you need to see a doctor. An explanation of the hymen - most hymens break through exercise during youth, and the breakage is rarely painful. An article on how sex should NEVER hurt, whether it's your first or your hundredth time. (a little bit of everything including my favorite "Sex should not hurt whether it is your first time or your hundreth time.") Vaginismus - expecting sex to hurt causes you to tense the vaginal muscles, which in turn does make sex painful. Relax. - Lubrication - if you are well lubricated, sex will not hurt. Use water-based lubricant with latex condoms. - Relaxation - are you comfortable with your partner? To have penetrative sex, you must be completely at ease. Is your partner gentle? - Foreplay - Penetrative sex does not exist without other sexual activity to preceed it. You need enough time to relax and become well lubricated. - Masturbation - if you are comfortable with your body, understand your own anatomy, and are able to communicate what you enjoy with your partner, sex will be all the more enjoyable. Try www.scarleteen.com and www.clitical.com. - Expectations - be positive. If you expect sex to be painful, you'll tense up so much that it will hurt. See above article on vaginismus. Sex still painful? See a doctor. heart Thanks LorienLlewellyn for the above links! heart And Bam! 90% of LI questions are answered. xp Even better, at the end, tack on a "If you have any more questions, I'd recommend this guild _____" and stick the name and link to Nikolita's guild, Bondage's guild, or both!
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Posted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 11:14 pm
That's a good idea. And yeah, Fizzlesticks has her guide in this subforum (not stickied) and in another one I think.
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Posted: Sat Nov 01, 2008 2:37 pm
I had sex for the first time exactly one week ago, it was with one of my friends. My first time was really painful, but I was really tight. I bled a bit for an hour or so afterwards.
It didn't last very long and I didn't climax but it was still pretty amazing.
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Posted: Fri Jan 02, 2009 9:35 am
Fran Salaska Nikolita Fran Salaska Ugh. I've taken to hanging out in Life Issues recently, and I'm getting really disgusted at how many people think that a girl should bleed her first time, and that it should be painful, and that the v****a needs to stretch out. No, no, and NO. If it's painful, you're doing it wrong. If it's bleeding, you've probably torn something. The v****a will accommodate whatever is in it and spring back like elastic. I want people to stop feeding this misinformation and lies and start TEACHING this stuff in schools! Misinformation and s**t like that was exactly why I started this guild. sweatdrop Sounds like I need to go take a look through LI again. Yeah. D: There was one person INSISTING I was wrong because sex was painful for her for six months and her doctor told her she was fine. x.x Fortunately Fizzlesticks hangs out in LI a lot to tell people how sex is supposed to be. : D I pointed out that the v****a does not stretch, because then women who have slept with big penises could never go smaller, because they would be 'stretched' for big ones. Surely common sense would dictate that vaginas which stretch out make no biological sense. Is there a way to get more sources? I'll scan these pages but it'd be nice to just have some on tap. Maybe another sticky specifically for that information? I love you guys. heart
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2009 9:58 am
um, question...... what if it was a girl on girl sex? sweatdrop
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2009 3:56 pm
Rukia_Kuchiki1916 um, question...... what if it was a girl on girl sex? sweatdrop Not sure what your question is. What is it about girl/girl sex that you want to know?
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2009 4:56 pm
Fran Salaska Ugh. I've taken to hanging out in Life Issues recently, and I'm getting really disgusted at how many people think that a girl should bleed her first time, and that it should be painful, and that the v****a needs to stretch out. No, no, and NO. If it's painful, you're doing it wrong. If it's bleeding, you've probably torn something. The v****a will accommodate whatever is in it and spring back like elastic. I want people to stop feeding this misinformation and lies and start TEACHING this stuff in schools!
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Posted: Mon Mar 23, 2009 3:15 am
Vickicat Fran Salaska Ugh. I've taken to hanging out in Life Issues recently, and I'm getting really disgusted at how many people think that a girl should bleed her first time, and that it should be painful, and that the v****a needs to stretch out. No, no, and NO. If it's painful, you're doing it wrong. If it's bleeding, you've probably torn something. The v****a will accommodate whatever is in it and spring back like elastic. I want people to stop feeding this misinformation and lies and start TEACHING this stuff in schools! Yeah. sweatdrop Fizzlesticks is in LI though so that's great. I'd go to LI more often but I don't have the patience for it anymore. That and I've heard of people getting in trouble for mass-spamming invites, and that worries me because I usually mass-invite people (BUT I do have a reason!).
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Posted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 10:18 am
I'm curious...
When I had my first time, it hurt a LOT, but I never bled at all.
Whereas when my friend had her first time, she bled like crazy, and the bleeding went on for 2, 3 hours... Even after they stopped having sex. :<
She thinks I'M the weird one.
Which one is abnormal ??
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