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 Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 12:20 pm
Bloodline: Hyouton Bloodline
Why do you want it: To be totaly honest, I love the ability of useing ice jutsu. I have the sme bloodline in almost every RP I'm in, so I have loads of practice with it.
What will you do with it: What will I do with it? Well, fight of course.
What you know about it: It originated in the water country. It was first used by Haku's family, and was shunned by the entire country. Members of the bloodline were hunted down and killed. The user has almost free range control on freezeing water, and can form it into any shape. The air around the user is generally cold. I'm not sure why to b honest. The user MUST have Water and Wind elements. The user can do one handed seals, to perform two jutsu's at once.
RP example:
The air around Rhulain began to grow cold. He had a cold look in his eyes. He snapped his arms out to the side, both doing different hand signs. A cage of ice formed around his target. From behind him, came a loud crash. A gaint white whale rose from behind him, and collided with the cage. the whale smashed his target, and froze what was left. Rhulain lowered his arms, and gave a happy smile. As if nothing happened, he walked away from the scene
((there you go. Sorry if the example was a little short. Thats how i RP. i put as much detail as necissary. If you want a longer post, I'd be happy to re o the example. hope i get the BL)
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Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 1:07 pm
Rhulain:1. Through no fault of your own, you have been mislead to believe that having the Hyouton bloodline allows you to utilize two jutsu at once. That is incorrect (and yes I checked and saw that it says you can, but I'm ruling that it is incorrect.) You can perform Hyouton techniques using only one hand to form the seals, but that is all.
The complexity that would be involved in molding two completely different chakra techniques in one's body at exactly the same time with two different hand seals in my opinion is just ridiculous.
2. As to the above, I'm going to have to ask you to redo your post (and yes, it should be a bit lengthier. Try to create a story within the post itself and showcase more of what it is to be a member of the Hyouton Bloodline.
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Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 1:20 pm
(kay so lengthier and capture the essence of being part of a hunted blood line? can do!))
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Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 1:28 pm
Alpha:1. There is only one stage of this bloodline, so I don't know what the deal is with your (Stage 2 request)
2. You need to watch your spelling of naruto-type terms. For example: It's 'Kekkai' , not 'Kekki' ... It's 'Chakra' , not 'Shakra' ... and it's 'Jounin' , not 'Juunin'
3. The RP sample wasn't bad, but the entire scene was a little rushed. However, you did use the abilities of the bloodline well.
I may need to edit parts of how the bloodline works now that i look over it, just to make sure it's balanced against the Byakugan and Sharingan abilities, just to make sure there is a reason to have one over the other. (As written it makes it seem like it is better then both)
...in the meantime please take a look at the notes I mentioned and edit your post. thanks!
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Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 1:34 pm
Rhulain had been walking in the outskirts of the Water country for a whie now. suddenly a rock flew past his head. A large group of villagers had amassed and followed him. "hey, you there! stop!" one ofthe villagers yelled. Rhulain turned around and gave a cheerful smile. "Goodday sirs, how may i help you?" he said with a light and appy tone. He knew what was about to happen.
"You're the reason we have all the chaos in this country! I figure, if there's less of ya, here's less fight'n" another man yelled. Rhulain nodded and replied "You make a very valid point, but, do you really think you can solve the world's issues by fighting me? You'd only cause more for yourselves."
the another man threw a rock and yelled "KILL THE TRAITOR!", and the mobb decended upon Rhulain, who simple stood still and laughed. When the mob reached him, they began to swing violently with hos and rakes and shovels. suddenly, the air began to feel ice cold. Puddles of water began to freeze over, and the air felt thick and dificult to breath. Several ice mirrors surounded the villigers. "Welcome to my lair. Do you know that quote? It's what the spider said to the fly" Rhulain said in a cheerful tone, he then shot out of one of the mirrors and stuck an explosive note to one of the villagers. he repeated the proccess several more times, with in seconds, all the villagers were tagged. "Before the spider killed the fly." As Rhulain finished his statement, the villagers erupted into a violent explosion. Rhulain looked at the mess and began to laugh, but in a twisted, and demented way. He turned and continued along his path, still laughing and full of joy.
((there you go. One RP example, with background story, and use of abilities. Please drive through to the 9th window. ...sorry, couldnt resist, hope its better))
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Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 1:56 pm
You are Approved for use of the Hyouton Bloodline!
There were a few spelling errors, but you did a good job with the bloodline itself and in remaining true to your character (kudos on that).
Just a few general Role-playing notes:
1. Make sure that when you use a jutsu, you perform the proper hand seals. This was not mentioned in your post, and it needs to be there (especially when your bloodline can perform one-handed seals)
[You don't need to edit it, because I saw you do it before, even if it was to use two jutsu at once. xd ]
2. Make sure that you are specific with the actions of your character. One second, villagers are swinging weapons at you, and then the next you are apparently in the ice mirrors? There was no flow to that section, and no description of your character avoiding, deflecting or evading their attacks, and there was no description of your entering the ice mirrors to perform your attacks. Try to be careful about that sort of thing.
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Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 2:00 pm
Thanks, I'm pretty good at staying in character. but i guess you have apoint. I've always been told that the ice mirrors were made from ice that is actually the users body, so i figured, when i happens i'd be the mirrors, if you catch my drift. But ya, spelling isnt really my strong suit. but thanks again. later
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Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 2:04 pm
Rhulain of Lutra Thanks, I'm pretty good at staying in character. but i guess you have apoint. I've always been told that the ice mirrors were made from ice that is actually the users body, so i figured, when i happens i'd be the mirrors, if you catch my drift. But ya, spelling isnt really my strong suit. but thanks again. later
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Posted: Mon Jan 11, 2010 3:58 pm
oh in another naruto guild i am in they put two stages for renmaru's bloodline
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Posted: Tue Jan 12, 2010 7:44 am
Ah okay. Well, I guess I could make something similar to that and break the abilities out into two stages of ability.
...you would only start at the first stage though.
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Posted: Tue Jan 12, 2010 9:14 am
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Posted: Wed Jan 13, 2010 5:29 pm
Bloodline: Sorikata Clan
Why do you want it: Well I've never used it, despite my making it o.o I have always wanted to, and know seems the best time to expirement.
What will you do with it: Make my RPC reach the Oinin Rank and RULE NATURE xD
What you know about it: I know everything, as I have created it
RP Sample:
Jade sat by the brook, legs submurged in the flowing water up to her calves. Her black curls cascaded down her back, framing her soft features. The sun kissed her closed eyelids as her hands played with the lush grass. All was quiet, nothing but nature ringing in her ears. She suddenly twitched into an upright and alert position, something unnatural had sounded; the snap of a twig. She strained her human ears, eyes scanning the surrounding woods. Jade cursed herself as she could not hear anything in her current state. She smirked, knowing damn well that she would fix that in a moment. Her eyes began to loose their lilac color, turning into a golden brown, similar to a falcon. Her eye sight increased practically tenfold, and everything was vibrant to her. The once dark spaces were like beacons in the night. Her ears lost their natural roundness, and began to turn to points, long and sharp. The bat she had studied long ago had actually come in handy. Her new ears twitched with every noise, every breath, every movement her head snapped to it. A growl erupted through the woods, and Jae immediately pin-pointed its location. A rather large wolf emerged from the trees, seemingly smiling at her. Jade smirked, backing up slowly as her ears returned to normal. Her nails grew, sharpening and becoming claws, as well as her teeth, growing to thrice the size. The wolf let out a bark, just before leaping at her, paws out. Jade laughed and dove forth, aiming low and wrapping her arms around the wolf's torso. She tackled it back, and it flipped her off with it's hind legs. Suddenly, the wolf began turning into a Rhinocerus, and began to charge. Jade ran forth, loosing her eagle eyes and gaining large falcon wings. The falcon was her 'default' animal, and also the easiest for her to perform. Jade jumped into the air, propelling herself off of the Rhino's horn, just before it crashed into a tree. The Rhino turned and reared onto it's hind, releasing an odd roar. Jade turned in midair, loosing the wings and performing a sky dive. A simple game was taking place between her and a friend, nothing more than a game of Point. While skydiving, Jade's mouth opened wide, and rows of razor sharp teeth showed. The Rhino turned to a bear, and caught her in it's infamous hug. Jade struggled until she admitted defeat, and the bear let her go, returning to the normal man it once was.
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A faint smile Vice Captain
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Shruikan Tenshi Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Jan 13, 2010 5:47 pm
approved! obviously since you know it and well...yeah XD
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Posted: Wed Jan 13, 2010 6:09 pm
Jaded...
Sacrifice yourself
And let me have what's left
I know that I can find
A fire in your eyes
I'm going all the way
Get away, please...
Spankies =)
...You take the breath right out of me
you left a hole where my heart should be
You've gotta fight just to make it through
Cause I will be the death of you
Propaganda...
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A faint smile Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Jan 13, 2010 6:38 pm
Bloodline: Ranmaru
Why do you want it: I have been using this bloodline many times in other guilds. The use of it's Genjutsu flabbergasted me and how useful this bloodline is.
What will you do with it: Use it to my own advantage. Planning out the battle and using everything you have works well in winning. Genjutsu is one of the tools that can achieve it and the greatness of it.
What you know about it: Well, for starters, it can block out the Rennigan, Sharingan, and the Byakugan. Users can block out mostly all the Genjutsus from another person. Can see Chakra Points like the Byakugan (Also known as Tenketsus.) See threw objects like looking threw glass windows. And last, it can since the life force of another person (but only up to 15m.) Genjutsu bloodline (Kekkei Genkai.) mostly.
RP Sample:
As the night blacken the sky, still moments of time, Katsuro was walking quietly and calmly threw the dark forest with a lantern lit with a small fire, blazing with a raging glow. Opening his wings like a dark angel he wrap them around his body to keep himself warmer from the chilling night. He was ready for anything right now. It was time for him to see what his bloodline's ability and effects it can do and cause. He was excited to try out something new, always had been when he was young. He stop where he was at as the wildlife made deafening sounds. It was annoying him a bit but knew he had to overcome it. He slowly set down the lantern, making sure it did not tip over and closed his eyes calmly. Guided by the sounds, he listen as the sounds of crickets, owls, and the wind slowly grew softer. it was as if time was being stop, making him feel like he controlled time. His visions of his past came to him, slipping past him with every thought. The time when he was crying. The time when he was sacred. Every moment of that time when his clan was slaughtered. It came to him like a wave. And the most important part, the evil grin on his father when he first met him. At that moment, his eye lids shot up with the sound of a ring. Blood red, gleaming eyes was glowing threw the dark as the animals did not know what to do when they saw it. Threw Katsuro's eyes, he could see threw the trees, the rocks, and the ground. As if he was walking on air. As if he was a floating cloud. The life force of animals got his attention as they glow with a high blueish-white. He felt the power and chakra running threw his body to his eyes. Felling a sharp pain in his head, he quickly blink and his eyes turn back to there original color. He felt it and seen it. He was happy but also in pain. He figured it was time to get back anyways. Picking up the lantern, he quickly walk out of the forest with a black fog and hurried back home to the village with the pain in his head.
(lol, kind of long....XD)
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