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 Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2007 10:15 am
[Sha] Quote: Calling someone who is transgendered the 'wrong gender' actually does seem a bit opposed to transpeople, or like you don't respect their having identified as a gender opposite to their sex. If you think about it, the word 'wrong' implies that something about their gender identity is incorrect, and if they are transgender, and their being the 'wrong gender' is based on this, then you seem to be implying that the 'right gender' is the one that matches up with their sex. Not actually. What I mean is that if their avatar is male, I often refer to the poster as "he" or vice versa if the avatar is female. It's a simple enough mistake, but so many transgendered people totally call me out on it, as though I'm supposed to be psychic. I don't know if you're trans unless you put it into your sig or identify yourself as such. In fact, male or female are relative, as there are plenty of non-trans people who have opposite sex avis. Fine. But, given that you were talking about calling people the 'wrong gender', it wasn't immediately evident that you were talking about their avatars. But, I guess I see what you mean. I thought you meant you were calling people by the phrase 'wrong gender', rather than getting the pronouns wrong on the avie. I can agree that a simple correction ("I am/so-and-so is actually a s/he.") is what is called for, rather than an attack, though. Quote: Quote: And, honestly, even though I understand that a person may not be completely solid in their sexual identity at any point, but, nonetheless, there is nothing more irritating than having a person claim they know more about your sexuality or gender identity than you do. I was not doing such a thing. I was not pointing to a specific person directly and telling them that they don't know about their own gender. I was merely talking about how her gynophillic partner who is very much a trans-"I'm multiple genders at once" person may actually be suffering from being star-struck by her partner, as opposed to being truly MtF. Are, you, per chance, talking about PoeticVengeance and Taineyah? Because I'm pretty sure that Poe's interest and possible confusion in her gender identity preceded Taineyah's. That aside, Taineyah doesn't claim to be multiple genders at once; just not one of the two solidly identified and socially accepted genders. It's like, if we view gender identity as a scale, Taineyah doesn't fit at the ends deemed 'male' and 'female'. Even if you aren't talking about them, though, I can see why people are offended. You are talking about a specific person and saying that you believe them to be deluded into having feelings XYZ, even if it's to other people, and not to the person themself. Basically, I think what people are saying is that it's rude to pick out a few people and analyze their actions when is isn't asked for. If they want to be analyzed, they are perfectly capable of finding someone to do so themselves, and it's slightly rude to do so otherwise. Quote: Quote: I know this as an asexual, who often experiences people telling me they don't think I'm actually asexual, or that I 'just haven't found the right person', or that sort of thing. It is particularly frustrating, because I have lived large portions of my life feeling (and claiming) that I had to be of some sexual orientation. But, truth be told, I wasn't exactly any sexual orientation, even though I wasn't particularly opposed to sexual situations. I just generally lack the desire to engage in sexual activities, unless I can find some benefit for me. And you can feel free to categorize yourself however you should wish. But I don't think that it's a good idea in any way, shape or form to have sexuality, even if it's "alternative" to maintstream sexuality, thrust on you. What I feel is this person in question has been somewhat "brainwashed" into trans behavior and beliefs simply because she fell in love with someone who had severe gender identity issues. I'm not really sure if it's possible to be 'brainwashed' into 'trans behavior and beliefs'. Care to elaborate on how this is possible? Quote: Basically they say I shouldn't talk about it because it is offensive. But I feel that talking about something that someone finds offensive is not the same as "fighting words" or slandering. It's like if someone said that I had an eating disorder or a jealousy problem and then stated examples and reasons behind such things occuring. Instead of taking it as a personal attack and responding "OMG YER MEAN11!!!!!!11" it would probably be smarter and all-around better to say, "These allegations are not true, and here is why." Fine. But seeing as the people whom you were talking about were apparently not present, isn't it possible that those who were did not have the means of disproving your claims, and were simply suggesting that it was offensive to make claims about a person who wasn't there and whom they could not defend without bringing the said person into the conversation? It's really more like, if I said something to you about someone whom we both know and whom we both have incomplete knowledge on, so that you could not defend them on the basis of lack of knowledge, should I just be going on about what I think this person is doing, without giving the opportunity to defend them? Quote: I've been pressured into converting to Christianity when I was in a low and depressed point of my life. I know that I am not a religious person, in any way, shape or form. I have NEVER been able to believe in a higher power, yet I was practically bullied into conversion. Yet, you were aware of the fact that this was probably true the whole time, right? Quote: I feel that just like these instances, that it is VERY possible for a person to be convinced that they are heterosexual, even if they are gay, or that there is something wrong with their gender, even though they're really just not following GENDER ROLES. No doubt, it is possible. But whether or not it is appropriate to bring these things up, is another story. Basically, there is no reason to just bring up your analysis of people without request. Quote: I don't claim to know more than the individual who claims something. But I can claim to come to conclusions on their position or their beliefs based upon outside research and other close factors that may contribute to said behavior. Fine. You can come to conclusions all you want. But it is generally not appropriate to bring these up, particularly to people whom (1) they do not apply (ie: who are not the people about whom the conclusions are formed) and (2) who lack the specific knowledge to defend these people against your allegations. If you mean to present these views in a logical fashion, then bring them up in a way that maximizes the potential for them to be dealt with logically, according to people who actually know the situations well. Otherwise, it just amounts to a personal attack.
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Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2007 10:21 am
I cannot wait. I'm almost peeing my pants in anticipation.
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Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2007 11:42 am
Lord Vyce I cannot wait. I'm almost peeing my pants in anticipation. I WANT A WII DAMMIT
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Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2007 11:49 am
Koiyuki Guys, I need advice. I got this from my now ex girlfriend. Rokoko I don't know if you did this intentionally, or if it was the result of some kind of carelessness, but I saw some of the pictures I'd sent to you, some of the ones that were supposed to be... just for you, posted. Online. That's the last straw. I don't know or care how they got out, but this most basic trust of mine for you is now gone for good. Stop writing me messages. Stop sending me letters. What do I do now? Since I wrote this over a month and a half ago, I've found out the cause for such a drastic letter. Search 'yellow-chan 4chan' on google and click the second result. Hit F3 and type in Yellow-chan, and you'll see the cause for all of this. You'll see a couple of the pictures she took just for me archived for everyone to see. I don't know who did this yet, but I know for certain if I ever do find them, I want to violent and wicked things to this person, for putting the person I cherish through all that pain.
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 8:38 am
sweatdrop
I understand that you're upset about this, Koi, but should you really be directing us to where we could find these pictures?
sweatdrop
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 2:06 pm
Trich Dasgede sweatdrop I understand that you're upset about this, Koi, but should you really be directing us to where we could find these pictures? sweatdrop I probably should not, but I want people to see the cause of this. Of the thing that probably broke my beloved's ability to trust in anyone. The less rational side of me desires nothing less than to find the b*****d that hacked her Photobucket account and beat them with a sack full of oranges
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 4:34 pm
Koiyuki The less rational side of me desires nothing less than to find the b*****d that hacked her Photobucket account and beat them with a sack full of oranges Wait a second, Photobucket allows for photo albums to be viewed by the public; it's not just private to the person who made the account. From the main page at www.photobucket.com, I can click on the "find stuff" tab, search "recent images," and view every picture uploaded onto the website. If I happened to find one of these personal pictures, I can then find a link to the entire photo album. Nobody ever hacked the profile; the pictures were already uploaded into a public domain.
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 5:46 pm
The_Wicked_Man Koiyuki The less rational side of me desires nothing less than to find the b*****d that hacked her Photobucket account and beat them with a sack full of oranges Wait a second, Photobucket allows for photo albums to be viewed by the public; it's not just private to the person who made the account. From the main page at www.photobucket.com, I can click on the "find stuff" tab, search "recent images," and view every picture uploaded onto the website. If I happened to find one of these personal pictures, I can then find a link to the entire photo album. Nobody ever hacked the profile; the pictures were already uploaded into a public domain.
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Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2007 6:00 pm
Lord Vyce Even those set to "private"? My conclusion is inconclusive. My profile is set to private, but I couldn't find any of my recently uploaded photos with the search feature . . . and yet I'm somehow getting an average of 2000 "profile hits" a month. I certainly don't visit my account that often. Who knows?
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Posted: Tue Jul 17, 2007 6:09 am
The_Wicked_Man Lord Vyce Even those set to "private"? My conclusion is inconclusive. My profile is set to private, but I couldn't find any of my recently uploaded photos with the search feature . . . and yet I'm somehow getting an average of 2000 "profile hits" a month. I certainly don't visit my account that often. Who knows?
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 8:26 am
Lord Vyce The_Wicked_Man Lord Vyce Even those set to "private"? My conclusion is inconclusive. My profile is set to private, but I couldn't find any of my recently uploaded photos with the search feature . . . and yet I'm somehow getting an average of 2000 "profile hits" a month. I certainly don't visit my account that often. Who knows? Yeah yeah, I know I said I was gone, but there was something I wanted to say relative to this topic. Even if it's not easy for someone to walk into someone else's photobucket account, posting them on her account still counts as the public Internet. Even if it's private, someone can still find a way to view something without actually "hacking" her profile as anyone who finds that URL can view the picture regardless. Not to be presumptuous Yuki, but if she wanted to send you pictures of a questionable nature, she should've emailed or sent them directly to you. Posting them online cannot guarantee privacy; it's just the rule of the Internet. It's an unfortunate situation, but she has to be responsible for her actions and realize it was largely her own fault. Still, you have my condolences.
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Posted: Wed Jul 18, 2007 3:55 pm
Ocean and Sky Yeah yeah, I know I said I was gone, but there was something I wanted to say relative to this topic. Even if it's not easy for someone to walk into someone else's photobucket account, posting them on her account still counts as the public Internet. Even if it's private, someone can still find a way to view something without actually "hacking" her profile as anyone who finds that URL can view the picture regardless. Not to be presumptuous Yuki, but if she wanted to send you pictures of a questionable nature, she should've emailed or sent them directly to you. Posting them online cannot guarantee privacy; it's just the rule of the Internet. It's an unfortunate situation, but she has to be responsible for her actions and realize it was largely her own fault. Still, you have my condolences.
You can't leave yet!!! You haven't shown me your breasts!! scream My admiration for the human body transcends the sexes.
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Posted: Thu Jul 19, 2007 5:01 pm
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Posted: Fri Jul 20, 2007 8:18 pm
Everyone, please read Rokoko's journal, to find out the truth of all this.
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Posted: Sat Jul 21, 2007 9:22 am
Holy crap. This sounds like the plot to a novela my parents are watching. Glad to know the truth. What happened to the other person?
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