{As told by Lyra}

All things concidered, it hadn't been that bad of a day. The sun was shining (not that, on a tropical island, that was particularly unusual) and the damn bounty hunter was keeping his mouth shut for once. He and the kitten were discussing another one of their idiotic ideas again, but it kept them engrossed and out of my hair, so that was fine.

I should have known better than to think it would last.

"Guys! Guess what?" Jayde, who had been at Critter Haven all day, ran through the door so fast it left the curtain swinging in her wake. It was easy to see that she was almost trembling with excitement, so I sat down before she told me something that would make me fall over and Damen decided he would take a stab at it.

"Aliens landed on CH and made Kylin...normal?"

"No, stupid," she said, rolling her eyes. But even the crack on 'cooky ky' couldn't put a damper on her good spirits. That concerned me. But she just put on her biggest grin and opened the curtain wide revealing...

"Oh, hell," I groaned, laying my hands on my arms, which were crossed on the table. "Why...?"

"Before you start," she interrupted, "I didn't get him. Ky got him for me."

'Him' was what I thought was an Audio Rhetoric--a pet Jayde had been wanting for quite some time. But there was something just not quite right about...him.

"Jayde, he's purple. Are you sure it's a he?" She started to say something, but that's when it spoke.

"It takes an audio very secure
to wear lavender on all of his fur."

"What. The. Hell."

"Aww, he's so cute!" As much as I hate to admit it, the look of horror that crossed Damen's face was incredibly similar to my own. She'd used...the c-word. I'm surprised the strange dog-cat like creature didn't fall over when she threw her arms around him and gave him a huge hug.

"Lyra, did you hear that? He speaks in couplets!"

"No, there's only one."

"That means rhyms, genious." I glared at Alto, who was now free since Damen was now making gagging noises behind Jayde's back. Knowing that no matter what I said, the stupid teen would have some smartass comeback, I turned my attention back on the strange purple thing.

"Alright, so its in theory a guy, and he speaks in rhymes. Jayde, what kind of a man did you bring home?"

"A man who can think, a man who can sing
a man who can do any number of things.
I am man enough to wear purple and gold
but you always wear black and white I'm told.
As for the rest, I just have to ask--
does that just make you a really big cat?"

"What did you just call me, punk?" I bellowed, standing up so fast I knocked over the poor battered chair. It clattered loudly when it hit the ground, but the audio just smiled charmingly at me.

"I believe that's whats called, 'being told,'" Alto said with a grin. Jayde was laughing so hard by this point there were tears in her eyes, which I did not appreciate. Who did this dog-cat thing thing he/she/it was, coming into my house and disrupting everything?!

"Look, you--" I began, but damn if he didn't start talking again!

"I'd like you to remember, if you can
don't call me 'you'--my name is Riordan." At this point, there was little I could do other than throw my hands up in the air and stalk up the stairs to my perch on top of the house. What the hell?! Why did she have to keep bringing more of these things home?

I could hear them all laughing hysterically downstairs and I huffed, slamming the trap door to the roof closed. This was great, just great.