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 Posted: Sat Jul 13, 2013 7:51 pm
eat my dustin @eatmydustin@otterotterotter hey man where u been? #dontyoulovemeanymore
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Posted: Sat Jul 13, 2013 8:03 pm
Alias McFakename @otterotterotter@eatmydustin you were a bit slow with that rescue so I found another prince. Alias McFakename @otterotterotter@eatmydustin your princess is in another castle. #noreallyheis
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Posted: Sat Jul 13, 2013 8:20 pm
eat my dustin @eatmydustin@otterotterotter one: just pointing out how you keep referring to yourself as a princess. just how micro is your d**k? eat my dustin @eatmydustin@otterotterotter two: finally out of that s**t hole? maybe i should stop by and give you a nice, hot welcome
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Posted: Sat Jul 13, 2013 8:21 pm
Alias McFakename @otterotterotter@eatmydustin one: we may need to have a talk sad Alias McFakename @otterotterotter@eatmydustin two: if welcome is code for traditional move in chinese pls hurry
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Posted: Sat Jul 13, 2013 8:25 pm
eat my dustin @eatmydustin@otterotterotter no its not code for that #code4sexeat my dustin @eatmydustin@otterotterotter but where you at now? txt me address
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Posted: Sat Jul 13, 2013 8:35 pm
Alias McFakename @otterotterotter@eatmydustin bring me chinese anyway. nothing spicy. #code4chineseAlias McFakename @otterotterotter@eatmydustin they set me up on company property. rain man's my new neighbor! Sawyer, in boxers and T-shirt and not much else, dispatched a third tweet with the apartment number and hoped it was enough, and with one hand occupied by his phone, waiting for the return tweet, he contemplated a box full of half-organized clothes. Should get dressed, probably. Especially considering who he was inviting over.
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Posted: Tue Jul 16, 2013 7:28 pm
Dustin stared at the final tweet, brow raised. "What the...," he said, instantly exiting his apartment mid-thought, crossing the hall and knocking on the adjacent door. "Sawyer, open the ******** up."
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Posted: Tue Jul 16, 2013 7:32 pm
He jumped, and when he opened the door he was still in the act of putting on his pants, one hand occupied with his zipper. He glared, although Sawyer glaring had the effect, rather, of a baby rabbit trying to growl. "You people and your ******** Nightcrawlering around everywhere! Jesus Christ! I take it as a kindness you didn't actually bamf into my living room, thanks." Clearly the reality had not yet set in, even though Dustin had actually referred to a free apartment.
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Posted: Tue Jul 16, 2013 10:01 pm
"No, microdick, I live across the hall from you," Dustin grinned, catching Sawyer pulling up his pants and fumbling with his zipper. "So, howdy neighbor and all that jazz. Next time you tweet how lonely you are, don't be a tease cause I'll be over in seconds." "Do you, uh..." He eyed down at Sawyer's pants and the zipper. "...need a hand with that?"
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Posted: Tue Jul 16, 2013 10:05 pm
That got only a lifted middle finger as he successfully got his fly closed, and he scooped a random jacket off the floor like being caught in short sleeves was akin to being caught naked. "I'm gonna start locking my door," he lied as he shrugged into it. Which only served to make it obvious he didn't already lock it. Good work, Sawyer. "Small world, I guess? Hey! Does this mean I can come over and eat your food? Can you guys even Nightcrawler anyway or is that just us?" He stepped aside to let him in, peering over his shoulder across the hall like he was expecting to see a pentagram scrawled in blood on Dustin's door, or something similarly foreboding.
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Posted: Tue Jul 16, 2013 10:14 pm
"Don't be a little b***h and lock your doors," Dustin snarked as he crossed into the apartment. "And yeah, sure whatever, but the only food I have in my apartment is booze," he shrugged as he headed straight for the fridge. He looked inside and pulled out some leftovers and immediately begun snacking as he hopped onto the counter as a seat. "I'll be doing the same thing to your place. Like I am now, by the way." "What the ******** do you mean Nightcrawler? Like teleport? I think so," he shrugged. "Haven't tested that out."
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Posted: Tue Jul 16, 2013 10:18 pm
He watched mournfully as Dustin helped himself, but didn't protest. Instead he flopped onto the futon, slouching masterfully, and settled for whining: "Where is my Chinese food? I was promised Chinese food," he said, in flagrant denial of reality. "You promised me food and instead you're eating mine. You're so cruel to me. Knights in shining armor are supposed to be charming. And chivalrous. Also if I thought there was a chance I could bamf around I would try it in a heartbeat," he added, in absolute bewilderment.
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Posted: Tue Jul 16, 2013 10:25 pm
"Hey, ******** that. I'm mother ******** charming, chivalry, classy and all that dumb s**t," Dustin hopped off the counter, remaining leftover sandwich in hand, and sat next to the other boy on the futon. He offered out the sandwich into Sawyer's chest, as if offering him his own food was some kind of nice and noble gesture. "I'll order the Chinese food for later tonight. On me, sound good?" "It's like a date, only I probably won't get to ******** you after, so it's a really shitty date," he explained. "So be appreciative. See? Mother ******** chivalry. That's prince charming white knight s**t right there."
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Posted: Tue Jul 16, 2013 10:32 pm
"You're an absolute saint," he said soberly, waving the sandwich away with a wistful look. "They're gonna put you in stained glass. Is it hard, going through life constantly trying to get laid? Or is it just for me? It's me, isn't it? I've broken down your defenses. I hope I haunt your dreams." He sounded pleased, at that. Haunting dreams was clearly his idea of a good time. "Maybe if I play my cards right you'll buy me dessert too. I could twerk for you." No he couldn't.
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Posted: Sat Jul 20, 2013 12:45 pm
"Suit yourself," Dustin shrugged as he took another bite of the sandwich. "Oh yeah man, it's just you. I'm a virgin saving myself for you, please, oh won't you please let me ******** you like I do in the dreams you haunt every night?" Dustin scoffed, hardly able to keep any level of a straight face after the word 'virgin.' "Twerk for me and I'll just throw straight cash at you, you'll be like my little stripper," he winked. "Only with even more socks stuffed in your pants. C'mon, show me what you've got boy."
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