Welcome to Gaia! ::

I am such a terrible person. When I heard you two broke up I was.. excited. I thought that maybe now it's my chance. Maybe you can finally understand. And then I looked back at how happy you were in those couple months, how all of your emotions just seems so much more real and heartfelt than they were before. I think back to when you messaged me earlier this week and how I didn't say much because I was busy, but I wish I had said more. I am your friend, I should be there for you no matter what. I know you're out building your relationship with God, but I wish I could just say to you that if you need someone to talk to, I've got your back, too. I know it would be even more devastating if we ever dated, and I know that. But I love you so much and just wish you could understand that you mean more to me than anyone else I know.

heart It sucks. I just have these thoughts going through my head about how much of an awful person I am, how I should handle all of this, what will come of it..

The worst part is I kind of hoped she broke up with him because of me. Which is probably the most awful thought I've had during this whole thing. She always acted differently when the two of us were together because we're just really good friends.

This is why I should just.. give up on caring about people. It's killed me in so many ways this summer and I shouldn't have to keep hurting myself like this.

If you think cutting yourself is going to get me to pay attention to you, you're right. But it's not the attention you want; you're a ******** idiot. Move on, I have.

@: The biggest problem in the world is lack of communication.

@: Please fix my grade. An incomplete will ruin everything. I did all the work. I even spent hours writing that last paper. I have proof I sent it.

@: I can't find your number. You always made things better. You were a ridiculous fantasy and everything we "had" was just completely toxic to both of us, but I want to hear your voice and talk for seven hours straight about nonsense. I would rather feel better than take care of myself right now. After two years of always having you reachable, I guess I took you for granted.
But you can't save everybody.

@CB: <3 Anytime.

1. Though I suppose I could be happy for you, I'm quite sure (based on more than one factor) that she is about as genuine as a Prada bag in Chinatown and, like such, will quite easily fall apart on you when you need her the most. You don't have to believe me. I won't blame you. But I am concerned, and I'll be around if things go wrong.
You never have to doubt that I'm here for you, no matter the circumstances.

2. Your ******** computer has issues because you don't know how to use one. Do not blame me for crashing browsers or pop-ups. You probably got half of them messing around with facebook applications. I should be the one mad here - I use the desktop for serious stuff.

3. I do not work for you. Stop giving me the most ridiculous tasks that you could do yourself. I've got a PILE of REAL things to do mad

@Luna: That seems.... awkward >>;
And now I'm going to not post here for months. I overuse. Ugh.

You are the most inconvenient and wonderful person for me to fall for at this time of my life.


-punch-