Another Poem ^^ (Feedback needed)

Have you ever seen a car, and it was so amazing to you, you almost stole it?

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[The IsLe]

hi there guys. Today I'm here to let you guys know, I have made another that I wish the post onto here, or, Ive already posted it. Why Im HERE is because I wanted you guys to give me some feedback on the poem. Because this is only my second
poem that I have made, I'm really hoping I can get some help from you all. I mainly just want ANYTHING that will HELP. Suggestions, advice, etc, etc. And good supportive comments don't hurt either 3nodding But anyway, on my last poem, "Our Future Homeland" I had gotten some major help from a player named: KittenPieChan This player, is also my sister, who I thank very much. Ill give you guys a link to the my new poem, and my other poem. If you saw my old post, then I can promise you that this time it will only be one link to the poem, sorry for that redface

exclaim Link Location exclaim

Our Future Homeland FeedBack Post

Our Future Homeland (Not-Spaced)

Our Future Homeland (Spaced)

Life's Simple Similarities - N.R.W.