Aww Sad- Private RPG

[akumatsuki]

Private HP Severus x Lily RPG between Syndehy & AkumaTsuki.
Please do not post unless you are them.

Lurkers welcome.

_______________________________________________________

Days
I haven't seen days
Just solid water
Down my face

Days
I've missed so many days
In a world that has become an unfamiliar place
Now to you, I'm just an unfamiliar face

I'm losing myself again
You swore you'd be around this time

When revelation calls
And everything is blown away
When revelation calls
And everything is blown away
Blown Away

Will you still be there
With your heart boarded up
Nailed with my mistakes

Should I start giving up
Or am I too late

I'm losing myself again
Turning us into friends this time

When revelation calls
And everything is blown away
When revelation calls
And everything is blown away
Blown Away

Sheltered days, everybody wants more
And take it away, everybody wants yours
These sheltered days, everybody wants more
We never change

When revelation calls
And everything is blown away
When revelation calls
And everything is blown away
Blown Away

[Syndehy]

‘Severus,

Eileen is dead. I thought you should know. I’ll tell you what happened when you come home, I don’t want you running your mouth to anyone at school about it.

You’re not going to be home in time for the funeral and I don’t want you sneaking away to come so I’m not going to tell you when it is. You’re better off staying at that school of yours.

And son, it wasn’t my fault, so don’t blame this on me. I’m upset about it too. If anything you’re as at fault for this as anyone else. You and your magic.

Anyway.

I’ll talk to you about it when you get home. Try not to let it get you down.

-Tobias Snape’

Even two weeks after getting the letter, burning it to cinders before anyone could read it, and doing everything in his power to try and forget about it, the words replayed in his mind over and over, relentlessly attacking his every moment. He could picture each letter and exactly how it had been written on the tattered piece of muggle stationary. Every pen stroke stood vividly in his imagination, as though he were looking directly at the note. Those words. Those passive aggressive words dripping with contempt were burned into his memory. It was like he had been watching his father write the letter, taking in every mannerism as the deplorable father scribbled out his thoughts. The loathing expression of his face. The disgust in his eyes. His fingers wrapped so tightly around the pen it turned his joints white. Everything was perfectly clear to the Slytherin potions prodigy. No doubt the man had been drunk writing it, the smell of alcohol drifting from the paper almost alive to Severus’s nostrils even now that the letter was gone.

Tobias blamed his own son. Severus didn’t even know what had happened. How his mother had died or why. Or even when. How could it have possibly been his fault? But Tobias was more than ready to pin the guilt to him, regardless of the lunacy behind the heart-stomping gesture. And Severus couldn’t help but wonder if it was, on some small level, true. Maybe he really had done something to drive her over the edge. Perhaps a parting comment had struck her too deeply, or his general outlook on life depressed her in some way. Or maybe the potions he liked to make when he was home had poisoned her somehow. If Tobias was blaming the death on him, then she couldn’t have merely been sick or gotten into some kind of accident. There had to have been more to it than that.

Had she ended her own life?

The uncertainty of it all was what really drove him crazy. His father had refused him answers. Even though he had written back demanding an explanation, he knew he would not be getting one. The man was too stubborn. If he didn’t want Severus to know any of the details, then that was how it was going to stay. There was nothing to Slytherin could do about it.

And it was killing him.

He especially loved the part where his father told him not to worry about it. How delicious that the man would blame him, than say not to let it get to him. It was like saying something ruthless about another person only to cover it up with an “I’m just kidding” and a self-indulgent laugh. Tagging something like that to the end of the sentence doesn’t make up for what was said.

A part of him had been expecting something to go wrong, but not something so huge. Everything had been going so well. It had only been the second day of school, and he was in his usual sense of ‘this year might not be so bad.’ But it was even stronger this time around. There had been no encounters with the Gryffindor Marauders, his Slytherin housemates almost seemed pleased to have his company, and there was even a girl he was staring to fall for. All his teachers were glad to have him back, and he had been skipped ahead to the most advanced potions class the school had to offer even though it was only sixth year. Indeed, he had a feeling that the year might actually have proven to be a good one. Even with Sirius and his loser friends there to torment him, there were so many good qualities about the school opening up to him that had evaded him in years passed. He found things to laugh about. He never laughed so much before. It was all so great.

Too great.

And then the letter came.

It had fallen so harmlessly into his lap that day. How could he have known it would completely shatter his world? The smell of alcohol, probably spilled onto the paper by his drunken father, was no tip-off. On the few occasions his father felt compelled to write him the smell was there. Apparently his father couldn’t hold onto a drink and write a letter at the same time.

After reading the letter, Severus felt his heart crumble, sinking into his stomach and quickly consumed by the acid there. Nothing was left of his soul. The one person in the entire world he felt truly cared about him was gone. He had nothing left. No one to cry to or seek comfort from. To protect and find protection in. How could it have happened? Why would she abandon him? What was he supposed to do now that she was gone? All the questions he knew no answers to plagued his mind, keeping him up at night and stealing his appetite during the day. He stopped eating normally, sleeping even less. His world was a nightmare.

All he could do was find ways to escape it.

That’s when he changed.

It took no time at all for the Slytherin recluse to alter his ways completely, turning from the school’s silent people watcher into the resident bad boy. School meant nothing to him, so after a while he was almost never in classes. His grades plummeted, his teachers confused and worried. No one knew about his mother. He had destroyed the letter far too quickly for anyone else to find out about it. He spent time hanging out with the suspected Death Eaters of the school, rather than keeping to himself as usual. The boy was constantly getting into trouble, and not just for harmless pranks like the Marauders. Often his stunts would lead to full-out fights with his victims. More than once someone ended up in the hospital wing. He even picked fights with his most hated rivals, just to take his mind off of the guilt and confusion in his heart. Pain was an escape to him. He found himself using it more and more to get away.

Along with other means.

All of a sudden, the reason why his father liked to be drunk so often was perfectly clear to him. He had taken a shine to it too. When he couldn’t get alcohol, he used potions to help him out a bit, though no one in the school could confirm such allegations. He did well to hide the inappropriate school behavior from public knowledge. He just didn’t want to think about it.

It was not the reason his mother died.

The hour was late, well past midnight, and the Slytherin was once again roaming the halls. Sleep was lost to him, so he was looking for something to do with his time. He had already broken into the potions classroom and raided it to get back at Slughorn for giving him detention the other day. Sighing, he moved to the courtyard, taking a seat on one of the benches as he pulled out a smoke. He used his wand to light it, taking a deep breath and exhaling. He slumped against the wood, watching the sky with a frown. Nights were the worst. There was no one around to give him the attention he needed. Only his thoughts were there.

And he didn’t like those.

His body was thin, the lack of food starting to make itself known quite clearly. But he couldn’t eat. The sight of food made him feel sick. All he could think about was that he didn’t deserve to have nourishment. Not if what his father wrote was true. That it was his fault.

Taking another puff, he closed his eyes, resting the back of his head against the bench. It would be hours before the sun came up, and he was already out of things to do.

[akumatsuki]

It had been interesting change of pace since boarding the train at platform 9 ¾ at Kings Cross Station a few weeks previous. Lily had been looking forward to school starting once again, to change the routine of merely studying all of vacation.

It had been lonely this summer break, while she had written to a few of her fellow Gryffindors during the break it hadn’t been the same. She and Severus had been close since had informed her of what she truly was so many years before. They had done so much together, sneaking into Tuny’s room to sneak a peek at her letter to Dumbledor, sat together on the train to and from school and had studied together, despite being in different houses. She should have been aware of the ever hanging change in the air. In the end it all had come down to her Sev, calling her the lowest thing he ever could. “Mud-Blood.” It had stung and cut deep. Too deep. She hadn’t spoken to him since he had threatened to sleep outside the portrait doorway to Gryffindor tower. He had tried to take it back, but no matter what someone could say, it wouldn’t change what had been done.

She had kept to herself since the incident last year mostly. She was friendly, but not as outgoing as normal. It felt odd without him there for some reason, but nothing was ever supposed to stay the same forever. The first few days had passed without much notice; new schedules, old friends and much of the same as in previous years. Within the first week she had begun to notice a change in Severus, despite her telling herself repeatedly that she should ignore him. She was doing her best to ignore it and brushed off the nagging feeling of stepping forward as lingering nostalgia.

It seemed a few weeks had passed this way; Professor Slughorn had pressed her for answers the previous day about his star pupil’s change in behavior. She was at a loss for it honestly. She didn’t know if this was residual from their, for a lack of a better term, falling out the previous year or not. She had merely left the professor standing there answerless, only to be bombarded by Sirius Black as she exited.

She had disliked him, Potter and their entire little juvenile crew since she had the misfortune of sharing a compartment with them on the train ride their first year. She was too busy within her own mind when she missed the first half of what he had been babbling about. It wasn’t until he asked her what she felt about Potter that she was jolted from her thoughts. The first thing that came to mind was the same thing she had said to Sev about him previously, ‘James Potter is an arrogant toerag.’ She couldn’t outright say that to one of his cronies though, so taking the less blunt route she simply explained “he wouldn’t be as bad if he toned down on his more bombastic behavior.”
She had regretted saying anything at all when he had run off and joined up with Potter, Lupin and the ever trailing Pettigrew.

It had been a day since of this now, yet she was still seemingly distracted. So much so she barely realized the hour, and her lack of accomplishing anything more than a few lines on her parchment. It seemed Transfiguration would have to wait until tomorrow to be finished.

Climbing the stairs from the common room, it was little surprise to find the room she shared with other Gryffindor sixth year girls, quiet and dark. Trying to keep quiet she slips out of her school robes and pulls her nightgown over her head. Her mum had gotten it for her the previous year and it had been longer at the time, however having grown a few inches since then, the hemline of the white tank top styled white cotton gown now rested just above her knees. Quickly adjusting the ribbon that adorned the squared neckline she moves to her nightstand, grabbing her brush. Loosening the plaits from her braid, she pulls the brush through her hair. It had begun to nearly reach past her mid back in slight waves of dark red, which she had thought of cutting off over the summer. Call it vanity if you must, but she had vetoed the idea nearly as quickly as it had sprung to mind.

Moving from the side of her bed she walks to the window nearest to her in the round room.
She had been looking out at the waning moon above the forest tree line for sometime, still reflexively pulling the brush through her hair before catching sight of a small red light below.
She had a deep suspicion she knew who the silhouetted figure was despite the distance as she wrinkles her nose in disgust at a small trail of small rising from the glowing cherry ember. She watched for a moment half tempted to cast ‘Reducto’ on the cigarette to blast it to pieces, before remembering it wasn’t her to job to help, protect, or stand up for him any more.

Setting down her brush she grabs her wand, willow ten and a quarter inches long, and opens the window a crack looking down at him. Nothing destructive she chided herself. Only enough to either spook him or wake him from his wallowing. Casting a quick and quiet ‘avis’, a small number of birds fly out of her wand and down below swooping over the smoking figure on the bench.

---
((Since you put this as year six I incorporated stuff that happened in year five. Hope you don’t mind. Also sorry for the delay. I wasn’t happy with it so I kept rewriting it. If I need to change anything let me know.))

[Syndehy]

Severus had been too absorbed in brooding to notice that someone had seen him, and her window was just a little too far away for him to have really been able to notice even if he had been staring at the tower anyway. Coupled with the darkness of the night, she was concealed quite well from him. At least, at first glance anyway.

He drew in another long drag of his cigarette, content in his own little world where he had slipped off to pretend that nothing bad had happened at all. His mother was alive and well. More than that, it was his father who had been the one to die, leaving the both of them free to do as they pleased and once again laugh like normal families were supposed to. Without a doubt he knew that, if it had been the other parent, he wouldn’t be so miserable. He hated his father with every fiber of his being, the brute of a man always causing trouble and getting drunk. Why wasn’t it his fault that Eileen died? Why was it supposed to be Severus’, when all he had done was try to make her happy and take her mind of her abusive husband? Tobias was a liar. He knew he wasn’t supposed to believe someone like him. But he couldn’t help it. Cursing, he shook his head, determined to keep himself from thinking about it yet again. There was a happy world still waiting in his mind for him and he needed to get back to it. Where she was alive and Tobias was the one dead.

Of course, that world only made him feel guilty that he was enjoying the death of his father so much. There had to be something wrong with him if he was so eager to condemn everyone to death. Perhaps… he was…

Gasping, Severus leaped out of his seat, and nearly his pants, as a small band of birds swooped past him, their beating wings enough to stir him from his thoughts and effectively scare the crap out of him at the same time. Heart racing, he spun on his heels, wand pointed towards what he had taken to be a threat. Without a word he had managed to light one of them on fire, startled to see it was nothing more than a bird.

Watching it screech and slam into a wall, still burning once it hit the floor, Severus frowned. He didn’t feel bad about what had happened to it, more interested in finding out where it had come from. It seemed odd to have birds swoop down so near to him at any time, much less past midnight when the world was supposed to be sleeping.

If they had been bats, he wouldn’t have been so suspicious.

Looking around, it took him a moment before his eyes directed themselves upwards towards the tower. Growling, he spotted a figure in the window, though from the distance and the darkness he couldn’t tell who it was. A threat, as far as he was concerned. The worst thing about the offense? He had managed to drop his cigarette in the fright, completely wasting what was left of it. For that, the offender must pay.

Resolved, he summoned his broom, which he had stashed outside in case he ever wanted to do some Gryffindor tower-related evils, and mounted it easily. It wasn’t exactly the newest model or in the greatest condition, but it would do for his purposes of investigation. After a wobbly start, he rose, steering himself towards the window quickly.

“Hey!” he growled, with no regard to who might be sleeping inside the place, “what the hell do you think you’re doing? Do you have a ******** death wish you stupid litt-“ Oh, s**t, it was Lily.

Coming to a dead stop in the air, Severus watched the girl, surprised to say the least. Why had she been the one to startle him like that? Was she… toying with him now? Maybe she had gotten together with James and had seen the light in picking on others. Whatever the case, he could feel his stomach tightening at the sight of her. Damnit, she looked as beautiful as ever, while he sat malnourished and ill-looking on an old broom. Hopefully the darkness would offer him some room to hide.

Growling, he kept his front up, watching her and waiting for an answer.


((No, I was expecting that stuff would be included. xD No need to change anything.))

[akumatsuki]

This may not have been the wisest of all decisions made, Lily thought ruefully as the person below jumped up from their seat. It wasn’t meant to cause that drastic a reaction in all honesty; especially so when the person began to set the birds aflame.

She would have felt sorrow for the little creature being reduced to ash, if the bird had been real and not just a silly little spell. The thought quickly crossed her mind for a moment of it they could feel pain since they weren’t exactly real. It would require some study at a later date, but now was not the time as the figure was quickly grabbing a broom and trying to get up to her window. The thought of merely closing the window and pretending nothing had happened briefly flashed through her mind for a moment to only be shot down by simple logic. If it had pissed off someone enough for them to want to pick a fight they probably wouldn’t be deterred by a thin piece of glass and wood lattice barring them from those inside.

She had expected a reaction, yes, but not one quite so angry towards her. She had seen his fury and quick temper at others so many times in the past, but was very rarely the recipient of it. It was an odd change looking at him this way. He looked much gaunter than she remembered. Was it a trick of the light, the way he was sitting…shaking off the thought she levels her eyes to meet his somewhat defiantly. The last time she had even spoken to him she was in her night gown as well. It didn’t need to become a habit. She should simply apologize and head to bed, continue as it had been, or at least she would have if she weren’t so upset with his reaction towards her.

“Nothing surprising, Sev, a death threat from a Death Eater,” Lily quipped sarcastically, slightly surprised by her tone. She quickly turns surveying the room making sure the other sixth year Gryffindor girls had remained in bed and to regain herself. Pausing a moment she sets her wand down next to her on the night stand, despite everything she knew she didn’t need it against him. She sighs almost sadly at her comment. He had never denied it in the past that he wanted to be; hell his associates were all…she stops turning to face him. “Well now that I got you to quit smoking that thing, you can go to bed. That is all I wanted, what does it matter to..anyways?"She grabs the edge of the window pane to pull it shut looking at him her green eyes snapping with mixed anger. She shouldn’t care.

[Syndehy]

Severus let his eyes narrow. He had spent weeks trying to get her to forgive him for what he had called her the year before, and all for nothing. She was just as set on condemning him as before. Even a summer of being away from her, giving her time to cool down and maybe see things from his point of view had done nothing. With his mind in its current state, he couldn’t quite figure out why he kept trying with her. Obviously she didn’t want him to make things right. Why even bother? She was just another heart ache. Someone else who would eventually abandon him if he ever did manage to patch things up with her. It wouldn’t last. She would leave him.

Just like his mother had.

No, it wasn’t worth it. He needed to stop pining after her and give it up already. She had made he choice- her life was planned. A life he had no part in. Somehow, in the back of his mind, he knew he was only fooling himself. He wouldn’t never be able to forget her. She was far too important, even now. He was just too blinded by his rage to remember that tiny little detail.

Hearing her words, he gripped the broom tighter, blood boiling easily. “I am NOT a Death Eater,” he hissed sharply, once again neglecting to take into account that other people shared the dorm with her. She just loved to assume that he was going to join them, but so far he hadn’t made his choice. Of course…. He WAS going to join them, but that didn’t mean she had to be so snotty about it. Who was she to judge him, just because it wasn’t the kind of life she agreed with? He didn’t like her company all that much, but he didn’t hold it against her. If she could hang out with people who picked on him relentlessly and not blink twice, why couldn’t he hang out with his own brand of friends? As far as he was concerned, she was being stubborn and unreasonable.

“Go to bed?” he growled, “who are you to tell me what to do? I don’t want to go to bed.” He, not exactly concerned with his own safety at that moment, moved his broom a little back from the window, carefully standing himself up on the thin handle. Watching her, wavering every now and again, he crossed his arms over his chest, arching an eyebrow.

“What the hell are you doing up so late anyway?” he demanded, uncrossing his arms only so he could fumble with another cigarette. While still on the broom. Standing. Seven floors from the ground.

[akumatsuki]

“What I am doing up is none of your business! You sound just like a child right there. ” She had begun to raise her voice, but quickly lowered it looking over to her immediate left as Mary, adjusts the covers around herself. This was ridiculous. She felt almost as if she were dealing with a child at the moment or even worse, with Potter.

She was about to shout out some meaningless scathing remark when she quickly stopped. What the hell was the sodding idiot doing?! Here he was standing on his wobbly old broom, lighting up another cigarette. Was he trying to kill himself, or try to show off, either way the result was the same. Her already flared temper was rising higher. “If you want to kill yourself, do it somewhere else where already! You’re being worse then James right now!” She should have caught herself there, she never referred to Potter by his first name, but once let loose the words started to pour unheeded, and suddenly uncaring of who might hear. So what if they called the prefects in the middle of the night, so what if their houses would have points deducted, none of that mattered.

“You bloody git; you’re beginning to remind me of your damn father! Smoking, being a royal a**, I bet you’ve taken up drinking too haven’t you? I don’t know what’s gotten into you or why you’re suddenly this way, but personally I don’t care Severus! I had stood up for you so many times, and turned a deaf ear on things you said that I didn’t always agree on. You did the one thing I never thought would come from you…” She stopped right then to turn and see Mary, Gertrude and a few of the other staring sleepily at her.

Grabbing her wand she quickly pivots on her heals, retreating through the door and down the stairs to the Gryffindor common room. She didn’t care what anyone did right now. She was caught in between wanting to scream, cry or marching back up there to yell at his thick skull some more. Lily stops, standing just clear of the last stair step. At least here was still empty, the fire burning low, and the large room semi darkened. Huffing she runs her free hand through her hair frustratedly, her other gripping to her wand tightly, her knuckles white from the pressure.
She ran away like a coward she reflected for a moment, that would be the end of it, because surely with as much of an idiot he was being he wouldn’t dare follow her down, right?

[Syndehy]

Narrowing his eyes, Severus had to take a moment to muse over her words. He had an urge to tip over backwards and let himself plummet to the ground, even willing to cast a spell to speed himself up before splattering against it. If she didn’t care if he killed himself than what did it matter? Anyway, he didn’t really have much to live for when he thought about it. A drunk angry father who hated him, the knowledge of knowing he had a hand in killing his mother, and the scorn of the one person he had ever really loved. Wasn’t exactly the kind of life sought after by any means. Unfortunately, he was too furious to follow through with anything like that. To be compared to James! He couldn’t die and let THAT go unaddressed.

Insults continuing, Severus found himself growing all the more angry. Now he was like his father too?! This woman certainly knew how to hurt somebody. Kick them when they were down. His fists were clenched tightly enough to draw blood as he watched her escape into the dorm and out the far door. To follow her meant going into the common of his house’s hated enemies.

As it turned out, Severus was just idiot enough to do it.

Not one to enjoy being snubbed so easily, Severus shifted his weight, pulling the head of his broom towards the window as he leaned forward and propelled himself into the window. Girls were sent screaming, the others in her dorm having moved to see what had been loud enough to wake them up and get Lily shouting. They hadn’t expected to have a boy come shooting into the room like a rocket. He didn’t stay, though, zooming out of the dorm and down the stairs, still placed on his broom. Hovering just in front of her, he growled lowly, jumping off his broom to place himself directly in front of her.

“You just walk away?!” he snapped, “you say all those horrible things and then you just walk away?! You’re a piece of work, you know that? How dare you compare me to James Potter AND my father- I am not like them!” He was enraged, uncaring that he was swimming in dangerous waters by being in the Gryffindor common room. His focus was completely on Lily, dark eyes dangerous and wild.

Amazingly, he still had his cigarette in his mouth, taking it between two fingers for a moment so he could blow some smoke into her face. No point in trying to be civil now, he imagined. She was already pissed off at him. Why not make it worse? Might distract him for a little while, though he wasn’t considering the fact that he would regret it later. All he wanted was his escape. His wand was in his other hand, though he knew he would never use it against Lily Evans.

It was just in case any other Gryffindors came down.

[akumatsuki]

“If you don’t want to be compared to them then don’t act like them!”
It hadn’t registered in her mind to be shocked that he hadn’t bowed down to her like in the past. Before he’d stutter, stammer or relinquish the arguments to her, but never did he stand up against her. A part of her was glad she hadn’t caved and accepted his apology. The jerk was probably calling her a Mudblood in his head this very moment.

Caught off guard, she chokes on the smoke. The thought of seriously hexing him where he stood, flashes across her mind, but to do so would cause an all out war between the households most likely. This had gone too far and gotten way to out of hand. “I hate-“
She stops already hearing the sounds of footsteps coming from both the boys and girls stairways, other Gryffindors coming to see what the commotion in the middle of the night was. Looking towards the doorway, and then back at Severus, logic begins to overtake her flared temper. The prefects, head boy and girl should have already been down here…unless they had gone directly for Proffesor Mcgonagal and possibly headmaster Dumbledor, due to the girls screaming. That had to be the only reason they hadn’t yet shown their faces. This had to get resolved quickly. She felt foolish, standing here in her night dress yelling at a Slytherin, no, that wasn’t right. She was more upset to be having to have any arguments at all with him.

Sighing she tries to soften her features, that anger had slightly contorted. She knew well enough to end the yelling for the night instead of letting it continue till someone else intervened. ”Sev, we’ll continue this later, now get out of here before you get into trouble." The portrait doorway had quickly opened and then shut, but no one had entered. Lily was puzzled for a moment staring at the portal, before turning back to the angry Slytherin in front of her. “Please,”her green eyes pleading.

“You heard her Snivellus, run along now like a good little worm.”
Both Potter and Black were standing in the room. Lily spun to look at them both, confused and some what angry. She hadn’t seen them come down the stairs, let alone heard them until now. Even Stranger was they were both fully dressed. Potter was sporting a silvery cloak draped over his arm.

“Go now!”

[Syndehy]

Severus spun on his heels, turning to face the two Gryffindors at their sudden appearance. His shoulders tensed, the man releasing an almost animal-like snarl as he locked eyes with James. This was not the Slytherin they used to pick on. The weak, bumbling fool that was so easy to push around was gone now. Died with that reading of that letter. Now Severus had no reservations- nothing was holding him back from getting his revenge on them if he wanted it. Why should he be kind? The only reason he had been kind to them was because Dumbledore had made him promise not to tell about Remus being a werewolf. And the only reason he had done THAT was because he had been thinking about what Lily might think at the time.

Now there was no reason he needed to hold back against them. He didn’t have to be nice to make sure she didn’t get upset with him- she already hated him.

Instantly his hand raised, ebony wand pointed between the two of them while his mind tried to figure out which one he wanted to hurt more. James had stolen his love, but Sirius had nearly killed him with a werewolf. It was a tough call.

“Name calling again?” he hissed darkly, ignoring the fact that they were now surrounded by Gryffindors, none of whom would be cheering for him if a fight started up, “when will you grow up?” He eyes flashed dangerously, the potions prodigy eager to get into some more trouble. Picking fights was something that helped him take his mind off of things. Surely a fight with the entire Gryffindor house would be enough to make him stop thinking about his cursed life.

Or end it. Either way, he was good to go.

He wasted no more time, casting a spell that sent Sirius crashing into the wall directly behind him, collapsing to the floor in a stunned heap. Severus wasn’t playing with stupid little charms and jinxes- he was ready for a real, possibly painful encounter. It was a long time coming.

While this was going on, Remus slipped over to Lily, concerned for his friend. He wanted to make sure that she was protected while the rogue Slytherin was handled by the others. Not much of a fighter, he didn’t feel that compelled to get involved- telling him to leave wouldn’t help at all, he knew that. And this Severus… he seemed wild. Remus didn’t want to touch him. He couldn't believe that he would actually turn to fight in a room packed with irritated, half-awake Gryffindors!

"Lily, are you alright? Did he hurt you?"

[akumatsuki]

Lily turns giving Lupin an incredulous look. “I’m fine. He hasn’t done anything to me.” Where the hell had they appeared from? Turning back to the fray her heart skipped a beat at having seen what Severus was doing. Her voice seemed caught in her throat, she shouldn’t have bothered him. She should have left good enough alone, and she could be responsible for someone getting either seriously killed or hurt.

This needed to end now and she really wasn’t think at how stupid a move she was doing as she quickly slid in between the recovering Sirius and the extremely pissed off Potter, wand raised. “Expel-“ She barely heard the hex as the flash came from the enraged Black’s wand, and it didn’t seem he noticed her jumping in between till it was too late to take it back.

Some where in the corner of her mind she registered someone having screamed. She didn’t think it was herself as she reaches up to her cheek touching the slowly trailing warmth. She was in a slight daze as she pulled away her hand to see her finger tips lightly coated in dark blood. The pain wasn’t registering; she just kept staring at her fingers before looking up wide-eyed at both Potter and Black. Her wand hand slackened and she dropped her wand with a sounding clank in the now quiet room.

James having been about to cast himself, lowers his wand yelling out, “Lily”. He was stopped from moving forward as the portrait opened once more emitting McGonagal and the the heads of the boys and girls of Gryffindor. “What is going on in here? All of you put away your wands and get back to your beds this instant.” McGonagal had been Gryffindor hose head for quite a while, but this was probably the first time she had encountered a standoff in the middle of the night in her commons room. Her eyes level towards Lily, James, Sirius, and…Severus. “Mr. Snape, Mr. Potter, Miss Evans and Mr. Black the headmaster’s office, now!”

Lily turned toward the portrait, looking at both McGonagal and half toward Severus, her face still bleeding. “Oh Good heavens.” McGonagal rummaged with her robe’s pocket pulling out a handkerchief, before holding it out towards the girl.

Absentmindedly Lily grabs the handkerchief with her non-bloodied hand just holding it there for a moment.

[Syndehy]

“Wait, Lily!” Gasped Remus softly, watching as she marched off to deal with the situation. It was a little painful to know that the young lady had more balls than he could ever hope to have. Sighing, he tried to keep the others from leaping into the fray and making things worse. Someone had to be reasonable in this whole thing, why shouldn’t it be him?

At least he was trying to help stop this mess from boiling over.

The Slytherin misanthrope fell silent, as had most of the people who had gathered in the common room, when McGonagall entered. He wanted to dart back and get himself out of there, but there was no time now. She had already seen him and he wasn’t about to make it look like he had chickened out at the sight of a teacher. There was no way in hell he was going to be the weakest looking person in this whole mess. Not anymore. As McGonagall barked her orders and the other students started to disperse back to their own rooms, Severus remained stationary in the common, wand still in one hand while the other picked up his broom. In his mouth sat the cigarette, the boy feeling he was already in trouble and being caught smoking wasn’t really anything to be compared to getting caught in the common room of another house picking fights.

Though he didn’t show it, he was upset with himself for letting Lily get hurt. She wasn’t one of the people who needed to bleed. Potter, Black and his buddies were the ones that needed to pay. Lily getting involved was not part of the plan. That was why, however, he felt he really didn’t have room to blame himself for what happened. It wasn’t like he had asked her to dive in like that.

He could have handled a little pain.

Without a word, he moved out of the common room, deciding it best not to exacerbate matters any further. Sighing heavily, he drew himself into the hall, eyes downcast as he started slowly towards the headmaster’s office. Just what he needed: a talk with the resident old fool. Behind him he could hear the heated protests of Sirius, who was all too happy to try and pin all of the blame on Severus.

“He came out of NOWHERE into OUR COMMON and just ATTACKED me for no bloody reason! I hadn’t even DONE anything to the slimy little git -er- to Snape! He should be the one in trouble, not any of us! We were just defending ourselves against him!”

The boy didn’t care about their protests and moans, keeping to himself as they made their way to find out what their fates would be. He knew he would be the one to get in trouble- it wasn’t like he was going to deny the whole thing being his fault. Sighing, he fell in stride next to Lily, watching her a moment from the corner of his eye before speaking.

"I'm sorry you got hurt," he said faintly.

[akumatsuki]

Snapping from her daze finally, Lily places the kerchief to her cheek and turns walking out the portrait behind Severus. Sighing she looks at him, trying to smile, but failing miserably. “I’m sorry too, Sev.” She really didn’t want to deal with anything or anyone, especially the headmaster this late at night. She really just wanted to crawl into bed and sleep for the next week or so. She felt emotionally drained as she walked through the hall way.

Behind her she could hear both Potter and Black to convince Professor McGonagall of their innocence. Of course her name hadn’t come up at all. It wouldn’t most like from any of her fellow Gryffindors. They’d all blame the evil Slytherin and settle it at that, they’d all scream first blood, and the already tense house quarrels would probably get worse. How could she be so stupid? It wasn’t as if he wasn’t blameless, he did yell and come inside, and well attack Black, but she did provoke him. Brushing a lock of hair behind her ear she looks at Severus sadly. “You’ve changed, a lot.”

“Miss Evans, after we have finished we’ll take you to the infirmary to take care of that,” the professor called out from behind them walking with the two other boys walking beside her like bookends.
She winced at the thought of it, her left cheek was bothering her slightly now, but she highly doubted she needed to go to the infirmary for it. Looking down at her left hand, the blood was drying quickly. She shivered lightly, despite it being only mid September, the stone floors were cold and somehow the big castle was chilly. Lily seriously hoped that no one else would intercept them right now. She must look ridiculous, walking around the castle in only her nightgown. “You should have run when you could.” She didn’t quite know if the comment was directed towards Severus only, or partially as a chide towards herself.

She stopped before the entrance to the staircase leading up to the headmaster’s office, McGonagall calling out the password from behind her. “Cinnamon Bun”. All this over a stupid trick to get him to quit smoking, which much to her disliking he still was.

She was sure that the other three in trouble with her had been in this office numerous times before for serious infractions, but this was her first. She wasn’t exactly sure what to expect as they were ushered up the stairs.

[Syndehy]

Severus said nothing to her apology, keeping his eyes on the floor as they moved. He didn’t want her apologizing to him in the first place; she didn’t need to. Then again… she had been the one to send birds down to startle him from his peaceful night. If not for that, none of this would have ever even happened. So maybe she did need to apologize to him. At least for setting the whole thing into motion. But he still wouldn’t accept it. His actions drove the encounter to its horrible peak. He was the fuel to the fire she had accidentally started.

As they continued along, the Slytherin took a deep breath, ignoring the two blathering idiots behind him as his eyes once again flickered towards Lily. She was right, of course. He had changed. No doubt she didn’t think that it was in a very good way, either. It was bad enough when she was convinced that he was turning into a Death Eater based only on the people he chose to hang out with- now he was acting like them too.

She probably hated him.

“Yeah, well, people change,” he muttered absently, not wanting to say anything that might make her think that something was wrong. If someone found out that there was a problem, that his mother had died, then it would eventually get out into the open and everyone would be making their snide comments. He didn’t want to hear them blame him when they didn’t even know the full story. Little twits. They all seemed to love to gossip, and he was always someone they were more than ready to touch on when conversations ignited. He was a vampire. A Death Eater. He had murdered someone before. Gryffindors were his biggest fear. He had heard so much from their retarded little mouths. Sometimes it was amazing the kinds of stories they could pull from very small pieces of information.

He couldn’t risk it.

At her next comment, Severus growled. “Well,” he said bitterly, “I can always run now.” And he decided that was just what he was going to do. Why not? It wasn’t like he was going to be expelled for a little tiff and a run out on the grounds afterwards. The boy suddenly bolted off to one side, charging down the hall and veering out of the picture before McGonagall could properly yell for him to stop. The Gryffindors boys were left a little stunned. Even they weren’t stupid enough to think they could run away and avoid getting into trouble. Really, though, they didn’t think Severus was either.

They had no idea what he was up to.

Severus emerged out onto the grounds, still clutching his broom. His wand, though, had been put back into his pocket so he could once again take hold of his cigarette. Now... where to go?

[akumatsuki]

That b*****d! One second she was actually talking with him civilly and the next he’s bolting, leaving her to deal with all of this by herself. It was little wonder why he wasn’t placed in Gryffindor with her, the damn coward. If she wasn’t so tired, and close to Dumbledore’s office, she’d probably have tried to take off after him and wail on him till he quit being such a prat…if that was even possible anymore.

In all honesty that was the stupidest thing he could have done. Now Potter and black could claim whatever they wanted to against him and it would be two against one in there. She could only imagine what asinine things they’d probably concoct to not get into trouble on this one. The generally seemed to get out of trouble no matter how much they were in she mused. Probably claimed some Slytherin casted an “Imperious Curse” on them each time they got caught.
No one had even bothered to chase after Severus, as they continued up the stairs. They’d probably just have Professor Slughorn deliver whatever punishment they decided to him later, which sadly would be made much more lax since he favored the boy so.

The headmaster obviously had been waiting on them, the paintings on the wall behind him were a mixture of snoring old men and several waiting anxiously to see what was going on that they had been awoken from their slumbers this late at night. Albus Dumbledore looked at them somewhat sleepily from behind his half moon spectacles. “Mr. Potter, Mr. Black as much as I enjoy your visits-“

Lily didn’t know why she was doing what she was doing as she cut off the headmaster, but as pissed of as she was at Severus right now she wasn’t going to let these two gits come off sounding like heroes once again. “This is all my doing. I started the fight and caused all the commotion.” She stops and looks down at the ground then, feeling all the more the fool. It wasn’t as if the night could really get much worse, could it.

“Is that so, Miss Evans?” He looked somewhat skeptical at her and raised his hand as James tries to interject. “Did you also injure your face?”

“It was an accident. Nothing more.”

“I see.” He pauses for a moment thinking. “Very well then, consequences must be determined. Two weeks detention and forty points from Gryffindor.” Lily visibly winces. She knew it would be bad, but taking so much from her house for it seemed mildly unfair.
“That’s not fair! Sni-“ James catches himself, “Snape was the one in our commons fighting too.”

“And where is Mr. Snape now then?”

McGonagall steps up then, “The boy ran when we were on our way here. I do apologize-“

“No need Minerva, take those two back to bed and Miss Evans here to the infirmary. I shall send word ahead to Poppy to be expecting you. I shall have to call in Horace alittle later on.”

That was quick, but not painless Lily mused to herself as she looked back up from the floor, her hand still holding the handkerchief to her cheek. The bleeding had probably stopped, but she felt better holding it there none the less.

((If you want to skip ahead now or whenever, just let me know. =^.^= Sorry for the delay and poor quality. Work is a drain on anything creative sometimes.))