〖яɛмɛмвɛяιиɢ sυи∂αү〗✖

[three patch problem]

a PRIVATE roleplay, starring t i f f a n y blews & veggie sausages.

Forgive me, I`ll trying to find ...
my calling, i`m calling at night -
I don`t mean to be a bother, but-
have you seen this girl ?
She`s been running through my dreams,,
and it`s driving me crazy, it seems ...

Credit~lyrics to All Time Low.

[veggie sausages]

firstsecondlastname

song lyrics that links to character

→ basic info ←

name
age
gender
role
dream job


→ a little deeper ←

nicknames
birthday
crush
sexuality






[color=darkslategrey][align=center][size=22][color=3][u][color=2]first[/color]second[color=1]lastname[/color][/u][/color]
[list][list][list][list][list][list][size=10.5] song lyrics that links to character [/size][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list][img]http://i262.photobucket.com/albums/ii120/UchihaKurino/500x300.jpg[/img][/align]

[list][list][list][list][list][list][list][list][list][list][list][list] [color=2]→[/color] [color=3][u][color=1][size=16]basic info[/size][/color][/u][/color] [color=2]← [/color]
[list][list][list][list][list][list][size=11]name
age
gender
role
[/size][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list]

[color=2]→[/color] [color=3][u][color=1][size=16] a little deeper [/size][/color][/u][/color] [color=2]← [/color]
[list][list][list][list][list][list][size=11]nicknames
birthday
crush
sexuality[/size][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list]

[veggie sausages]

tobycraigmoore

I can't breathe, wake up from this nightmare that I'm in.

→ basic info ←

toby craig moore
23
male
the lonely lover



→ a little deeper ←

toby
28th of april
arianna
straight

[three patch problem]

ariannaharmonyashford

i'll watch the night turn light blue, but it's not the same without you.

→ basic info ←

arianna harmony ashford
23
female
the wistful disappearing-act



→ a little deeper ←

Ari
1st of May
toby
straight

[veggie sausages]

the crowd around me

s w a y s,
everyone - m - o - v - i - n - g - ,
p u s h i n g
pulling
g

n

i

p

m

u

j

f

a

l

l

i

n

g,

" singing ".


accept me.



i'm stood in the shadows at the back,
my lips moving along to the words,
my foot tapping slightly,
but my eyes fixed onto her,
watching as her body sways to the music,
and her lips -- those perfect lips -- stretch into a grin,
her eyes skim the crowd,
so bright and alive.


so real[/stike].


for two years i'd been afraid
afraid that i'd made her up,
that it had all been a dream,
that i'd finally finally gone crazy.


for two years i'd searched frantically,
then eventually tried to get on with my life,
but failed.
and now at last,
at last,
here she was.



real[/stike].


her voice soars out across the crowd,
so perfectly in time,
sending goosebumps up my arms and down my back,
the way it had when i'd first heard it on the radio
only a few days ago
and realised that i'd finally found her again.


-- xoxo --


the corridor around me is crowded
with people

-- mainly band groupies --

and equipment.

i remember with a slight smile
the saying my mother used to love ;

" barely enough room to swing a cat "

it suited this situation perfectly.

i squeezed by people,
apolgizing as i did so,
the backstage pass hanging around my neck,
and my eyes scanning each door,
looking for the one she'll be behind.

i find it eventually,
it's o p e n ,
and the people inside all have their backs to me.
i stand there for a few seconds,
my eyes finding her instantly
and tracing her body,
noting the changes that had occured during our two years apart.

she was slightly taller,
her hair cut into a different style,
and her body was shaped a little rounder
but she was still my arianna,
the only girl
who'd ever be able to spend a night with someone
and make them as obsessed with her
as i am now.

i'm just about to open my mouth and say something,
when she turns suddenly
-- as if sensing my presence --
and sees me standing there.


we both freeze,
staring at one another,
the only noise my pounding heart.


ooc; sorry it took so long. D;

[three patch problem]

ariannax [harmony]x ashford
I xo n e v e r xo m e a n t xo t o xo r u n xo a w a y xo . . .
••••••••• xoxo xo

this is home.

it's not a h o u s e,
not a cozy flat or spacious suite-
it's a stage, and it's home for me.
when you`ve been a foster child,
you get a different concept of home;
not just a building,


but the place where you feel safe,
happy,



f r e e .



it's one of life's lessons that I've learned over time, along with
don`t get drunk,
don`t panic in a hostage situation,
and probably most important, somehow-
don`t give your heart away.


here on this stage,
t h i s is my place.
i`m part of the music, it`s part of me,
and i can feel it as i sing,
as the crowd sings with me,
my smile matching theirs-

this, this is unbridled joy.



some people are musicians for money,
fame,
the rockstar lifestyle.
me?



i just love the music.


all too soon, it's over,
and i can`t help but feel sad-
but there`s no point in sadness, no time for it.
i`m an o p t i m i s t, by personality and necessity.
after all, sometimes hope is all that keeps me going.

before long, my bandmates and i have said our goodbyes to the crowd,
laughing with them, promising to return.
this time after shows, it`s always a whirlwind-
even if we`re just opening for another band,
like on this heady night.


i sigh softly to myself, grinning to my bandmates,
then slowly trotting to my guitar case,
returning the precious instrument to it`s home.
all i want now, is to return to my apartment,
and hold that precious toddler.
so beautiful.
so sweet.


mine-
but with his heart-stopping eyes.


little hope,
my baby girl, and his too.
there are three things i live for-

my music,

my bandmates,

and hope.



there used to be a fourth-
m e m o r i e s ,
but sometimes, those are too painful.
by nature, my temperament is bright,
sunny, even. light. and i can`t dwell on my mistakes.


even as i`m putting away the guitar, i`m dwelling,
and whenever i do, it gives me this horrible anxiety,
kind of like i`m feeling now ...
i`m far from alone in here, but i feel like i`m being singled out,

w a t c h e d .

not in the way of a celebrity musician,
but something else. more familiar.


with a strange terror, i straighten, dark hair falling back over my shoulders,
and t u r n .
for a moment, time is
stopped.

my eyes connect with his - - 'it`s him!' - - and stay there.
those eyes, so beautiful,
the same colour as my daughter`s.

i might have stood there an hour, maybe a year,
maybe a second.
but suddenly, there`s only one thing i can really think-

'run. flight. go, get out.



and without any more thinking, i turn to act on that.

[veggie sausages]

i hadn't planned it to be like this.


i could see instantly what she was planning to do,
and so when she began to run from the room,
i was following her in a matter of seconds.
i could see where she was heading,
towards a fire escape door
which led out into the street
and crowds of people
where she could loose herself easily.


"s**t, no.
Ari! "


i sped up,
and grabbed her arm,
stopping her.


" don't run out on me again. "


i'm panting,
even though we haven't ran that far.
behind me,
i can feel people watching us
but i pay them little attention.


my eyes are fixed on arianna.



"the least i deserve is an explanation why,
that's all i want;
to know why."


liar,
you want to hold her,
kiss her,
make sure she never runs away again.


shutup.


ooc; mmk, so that fails. x_x

[three patch problem]

ariannax [harmony]x ashford
I xo n e v e r xo m e a n t xo t o xo r u n xo a w a y xo . . .
••••••••• xoxo xo

i should`ve known better then to think he would let me run away
a g a i n .



i didn`t deserve to be allowed to hide again, anyway-
to flee from the only boy i had ever loved,
and to deprive him once a g a i n of his child,
the beautiful baby he didn`t even know existed.



my mind in overdrive,
ears roaring, senses shot,,
my world felt unsteady-
emotions of so many kinds all over, everywhere.
panic, fear, regret,
and that love that refused to diminish.


out of the corner of my eye i saw matt-
my bandmate, lead guitarist,
the only b r o t h e r i ever had.
he was looking my way, watching the situation;;
and i saw sympathy in his eyes.
matt, he`s the only one who knows the truth about hope,

and he`s smart-

i think he figured out what was happening here, too.


i felt my arm grabbed and flinched, tugging it away,
but toby, he`s so much stronger-
and the second his fingers touched my skin, it was like a shock.
how many nights had i again craved that contact?
from him, only him.
what would i have given to have him there?



i`m mortified,
elated
terrified.


i must look like a deer in headlights,
the way i`m looking at him- but i just can`t look away.
those eyes that have h a u n t e d me,
and still look back at me every day in the gaze of a baby girl.


i couldn`t speak.

i had to speak.

he deserved an explanation, didn`t he?

but i`m a coward. i never stopped loving him-

but things were different, then. i was so scared.

and now, i don`t deserve him.



really, i don`t think i ever did.


it`s damn hard to keep my voice steady,
and i really don`t succeed.
what can i say to him, after how i`d
r
u
n,

when all i had wanted was to stay?


"i`m s-so sor-ry."



it`s only a whisper, tremulous to my displeasure, and this venue is so loud-
i can`t imagine he heard me.
how p a t h e t i c, to have nothing to offer him but an apology?
words were all i had ever had,
and still...


" i just h-had to go."

i only wish he knew that was the last thing i had ever wanted.

and yet, how do i tell him the truth?



ooc; no worries! it was fine, i really enjoy this haha c: hope im doing okay. i got home early so i had time for a post~ and i screwed up the coding on this post D: