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Hilarious Inquisitor

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Hilarious Inquisitor

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//Full Name//: Lysander Deloy

//Gender//: Male

//Age//: 25

//Rank//: Junior Lieutenant

//Position Aboard the ship//: Viper Pilot

//Callsign//:

//Personal History//

"Why are we doing this?"

"Lieutenant, your Commanding Officer requested an evaluation of all personnel before your next tour. And the easiest way to do this is for me to get to know you."

"This is frakking ridiculous."

"Where are you from, Lieutenant? Where did you go to school? Why did you join the Fleet? Make this painless, please."

"Fine. Fine...I'm from Leonis...born and raised in the Capital, Luminere. My dad was in the fleet, XO on a Battlestar, for a helluva long time before he retired. Mom was a teacher, and an author, and was big on politics, Gods know why. I went through life, barely getting by, father always away, mother always busy. I spent more time at friend's houses and working than I ever did at home. I excelled at English, Geometry, things like that, but I always knew, no matter what, that I would be in the service...thought I was going to be a knuckle-dragger. Dad was a Viper pilot in his time, but he worked his way up from nothing...spent a lot of time as a Deck Chief...he showed me the ins-and-outs of those damned things. Said he could hear it talk to him when something was wrong...thought he could feel it when something was off...and for awhile, I thought the old man was crazy...it wasn't until my senior year of high school that I realized the old man wasn't frakkin' nuts. I worked at an auto shop after school, to help pay for food for me, for my sisters. I started reading a lot of books on military history, and flight, and all that garbage...and then I graduated from High School, with a scholarship. Dad had pulled some strings, got me a free ride to college, flight school, OCS...all that good garbage. I was going to be a Viper Pilot. And it just so happened that I was going to get stationed on a Battlestar. This bird is old, part of the Jupiter series, designed for anti-Cylon infiltration. It's my home now, more than the one back on Leonis. Don't regret the choice for a second. When I got my senior pilot qual...there was a huge party...this is my family, and I still get calls from my dad sometimes. And you know what? When I got on board this ship, for the first time, I got a call. And in that call, my dad told me, for the first time in my life, he was proud of me. Of course, this ship is going to be decommissioned after our last tour. Obsolete technology, without any Cylons to kill, right? Dad hates the frakkin' Cylons too...doesn't think we should get rid of the old ships, just in case the Toasters come back. Okay, so maybe he is frakkin' nuts...are we done here?"

"I believe we are, Lieutenant. Thank you for your time...my notes will be forwarded to your chain of command."

"Frak off."

-Report on Subject Lt. Deloy, Lysander
Lt. Deloy exhibits many negative attributes. A quick evaluation enabled me to glean certain facets of his psyche, which I feel are pertinent to this report. He seems to be bitter, especially over his father's constant absence as a Colonial Fleet Officer, and seems to resent his mother, who was a teacher, possibly because she may have invested more time in other children than her own. His closest existing bonds are probably to his sisters, which would seem that he exhibits a guardian type attitude whenever dealing with said siblings.

~CO Note: Guardian like behaviour exhibited commonly during Viper operations. This extends to his fellow pilots and shipmates, causing many reckless decisions and rash action. Should be watched.

It seems impossible that Lt. Deloy can cope with the stresses of being a Senior Pilot, as well as deal with such a fragile childhood without some sort of coping mechanism. It is highly obvious that the Lt. may break under heavy circumstances.

~CO Note: Drinking, Gambling, and Insubordination are common coping skills for members of the crew who have deep seated issues with family or such things. From what has been seen, Lt. Deloy only drinks lightly, with no risk of alcoholism, and does not gamble, except for friendly card games between pilots on longer tours without any stops at ports. However, insubordination is common, taking form in defying orders to perform whatever stunt he feels necessary to accomplish the mission. Around here we call that OFP, or Own Frakking Program. Realistically, it would take a large tragedy to push the Lt. over the edge, though he calmly sits upon it, toeing that line. He is being watched.

Overall, Lt. Deloy is obviously a skilled pilot, who is loyal to his crew, but has his misgivings about many things, and an underlying condition of possible depression. I recommend that after this tour with the Mycenae, he be given a mandatory period of R and R, to calm his mind, and perhaps to repair any burned bridges that plague his thoughts. End Report.

Hilarious Inquisitor

Resounding Memory
//Full Name//: Demetry Antov

//Gender//: Male

//Age//: 31

//Rank//: Commander

//Position Aboard the ship//: Commanding Officer

//Nickname//: The Hammer

//Personal History//:

"Thank you for coming, Major. I know you've been busy with other assignments."

"My commanding officer gave orders for everyone to go through this, and I was not going to disobey one of his commands."

"Good. So let's begin with the basics. Tell me about your home and when you joined the Corps."

"I was born and raised on Caprica. Father was third-generation military, and he was the first Marine. He and my grandfather, a crew chief on a Battlestar, both fought the war. From a young age, father told me about the Cylons and the war. He made sure I'd never forget about it, telling me every day the sacrifices he and my grandfather made to ensure I'd be able to grow up. Anyways, I had an otherwise normal childhood. I was captain of the Pyramid team in school and made good grades. I received a few scholarship opportunities, but I turned them down. After graduation, I joined the Marine Corps. My father pushed for me to join the Fleet, but I felt like the Corps offered more of what I wanted. After joining, I was shipped off to basic training and graduated with flying colors."

"I see. So tell me more about your career after you completed basic."

"After basic, I was selected for special forces training. I accepted and completed the additional training before being assigned to a special operations team. While I cannot discuss much about my time, I can say I was transferred between various teams and handled a variety of operations. Eventually, I was given command of my own team.

"It sounds like you had a good career. What caused you to transfer to the Mycenae?"

"Like the rest of my career in the special forces, I cannot discuss the reasons why I was moved to the Battlestar Mycenae. All I can say is that I was transferred and have been serving as the head of the ship's Marine attachment. I think when I told my father, he was satisfied that I was finally aboard a Colonial vessel."

"How have adjusted to the life in the Mycenae? Have you had any issues with the transition to being stationed aboard the ship?"

"If you're referring to the incident with Junior Lieutenant Deloy, we have resolved our issues. Now if you'll excuse me, I have an important assignment to attend to."

Notes: In my time with Major Antov, it seems he is stable and fit for active duty. He does seem to still have a conflict with Junior Lieutenant Deloy based on his immediate assumption that I was referencing his altercation, and I recommend that the two have limited interactions. I feel that the tension between the two would create more problems.

Hilarious Inquisitor

Chia Toma
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//Full Name//:
Shauna Lili'ana Hardin

//Gender//:
Female

//Age//:
28

//Rank//:
Chief Engineer

//Position Aboard the ship//:
Engineer


//Nicknamed//:
"Fidgets"

//Personal History//

"Excuse me, could you point me in the direction of the Chief Engineer?"

"Try in the vention ducks, she said that there was something funny going on with them about an hour ago and hasn't come out yet, sir!"

"Thank you. Cadet. Chief Hardin?"

"Finally, pass me that torch wrench will you? Nearly got this little blighter sorted out."

"Ahem"

"Hmm? Oh hello...what are you doing in...ah. Hello sir...should've called in to say that I would be running late but with this old lovely bunch of nuts and bolts it's impossible to tell what will go wrong next."

"Yes. Do you think you could spare the time to go through the meeting now?"

"Nope. Got too much to do though I did have a file prepped for such occurrences if you give me a second to find it," starts hunting through possibly the most immaculate tool bench ever known throughout the colonies until a small red metal box is found and opened to produce a small data pad, "Got all me personal info on it. Feel free to keep i- Oi! Where by ion are you taking that! It don't belong in that section of the ship...what do you mean it's malfunctioning? I only gave it a sort out the other day. Scuse me sir, duty calls"

Data pad accessed, authorised and confirmed.

Character Reference for "Fidgets" Shauna Lili'ana Hardin - provided by Chief Rankols of the Battlestar Columbria

Fidgets is the type of engineer who has most people rather worried, not because she isn't good at her job but because she's a little to much into her job. She loves being surrounded by technology at all times of the day and night and can frequently be found messing around with some piece of something to either get it working faster or just to see how it's put together. When she's not fixing the ship - which she sees as her baby, I'll give you fair warning now and if anyone damages it then there will be hell to pay - she can be found usually in her quarters still messing around with some form of tech or else playing a variety of card games with the pilots and anyone else who happens to be around. However extracting that part of her personality, Shauna is a very mild mannered person who likes to have fun with her friends and is extremely loyal to a fault. She is a bit of a time freak, having to be at things either directly on time or well before hand and has a fascination with Retro-Tech which drives many people insane, including myself and I adore Retro-Tech. She's highly quirky and jolly but in a professional sense and always knows how to act in any situation, even if it happens to be one where she's turns up in the middle of one of the maintenance corridors with a blanket and a pillow as her only cover.

However, a word of warning for the wise. She is from Sagittaron and does not believe in modern medical techniques in the slightest. So even if her leg is blasted off, sedate her before taking her anywhere near any medical staff because she will hit them with her spanners, screwdrivers and anything else that happens to be at hand.


Biography - provided by 'eldest' brother Eliseo Shaw
Shauna was born as part of a set of triplets along with her brothers Eliseo Shaw Hardin and Agustin Nolan Hardin to Samah Ahiel from Sagittaron and Diego Hardin of Caprica roughly five and a half hours after the pair were married. The triplets spent ten years on the Sagittaron, learning all about their culture and heritage before unfortunately Samah passed on one summer’s day and their father decided it would be best for the three to return to Caprica with him. There was a fair bit of regulations to work out in regards to this but the small group quickly arrived at the Hardin Estate and life was filled with many different and interesting classes ranging from the classical studies of the Gods history to mundane things like cooking and cleaning. Diego re-married when the triplets were fourteen and a couple of years later a pair of twins were born to the newlyweds.

Family matters changed slightly as arguments broke out, but the Triplets weren't too bothered and began to tailor their studies into more things that they were interested in. Shauna had found a love for all things mechanical at an early age and after a bit of research had started playing around with interactive toys to see if she could adapt them to make them better. She showed a real natural talent for engineering and was encouraged to go to the Academy and into Service when she was seventeen years old but opted instead to stay at home and marry her long term boyfriend of five years as he had proposed to her the month before. So the wedding was all set, the dress was bought and everything was going to be perfect but as the sun set on the day, the groom disappeared and was never seen again. He left a note saying he had met another woman who had stolen his heart and it virtually destroyed the young girl.

It took two long years for Shauna to get over the whole ordeal and she signed up to the service more as a way of getting away from her family than anything else. Her time there was positively the happiest time of her life as she was suddenly free to do what she wanted and didn't have to think about etiquette or anything like that. She developed her odd quirks and expanded her love of Retro-Tech after coming across an original robotic dog in the depths of the vaults which was promptly copied and rebuilt over the course of three weekends which earned her the nickname of 'Fidgets' and as testified by many of the crew, it still merrily wanders around the ship doing 'odd jobs' wherever it can find the need to do so. Graduating second in her class, she was immediately signed up to work as engineer on a ship she cannot recall the name of and quickly worked through the ranks on a number of different ships.

Favourite Food/Dish: anything organic and ham and peas pudding sandwiches
Birth place: Sagittaron
Romantic Preference: Bisexual
Favourite Recreational Activities: Card Games, Reading, Rebuilding Retro-Tech (and frequently blowing herself up doing so) and ballet dancing

Hilarious Inquisitor

Hell Mistress



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//Full Name//: Persephone “Persy” Joallis

//Gender//: Female

//Age//: 26

//Rank//: Captain

//Position Aboard the ship//: Commander, Air Group of the Battlestar Mycenae

//Callsign//: Scholar

//Personal History//

"Huh? Evaluation? Could of sworn we just had one last week..."

"That was a Medical examination, you were injured in a run."

"Injured? Medical? Same slur of questions, I suppose."

"All the same.. a few more would be appreciated. Let's start with the routine...."

"I was born and raised on Caprica, imagine that. My mother was a housewife and my father a proud Viper Pilot. My father helped aid in the new design of the Mark VI and VII models, at least for as long as they were testing it. Unfortunately, my father died off in one of his test runs. An 'accident', they called it. The engine blew as if a bomb had weaseled it's way inside.. but it was an error they adjusted. At the loss of my father, of course. After that it was just me and my mother. She got a basic job in town, bringing in just enough. It was a simple life. Nothing too extravagant, if that's what you're looking for."


"Alright. How about as you grew up, what brought you into the Military ranks?"

"Ha-ha, well, I'm not too far in as you can see, so it wasn't something I lived my life to become. My mother was against the idea. Kept me far from the military, and anything flying.. she was paranoid about my fathers accident, which was understandable. Anyways. Once I grew into my own mind(at 21), I figured flying might be fun. Fun, not necessarily for what I'm doing now, but at the time there wasn't much else.. exciting, around. I wanted to break for the norm of things, if that makes sense. It took some coaxing and hard effort, but I got into flight training. The simulators killed me the first time, but my second wind was enough to pass me. They told me I was stiff, but had a 'natural feel' for flying. It's my dad's genes, no doubt."

"I see. I hear you've just recently joined Mycenae... is this your first time on a Battlestar?"

"First time? Oh no, no! I was on.. two before this, but I got transferred constantly. My first time was aboard the Atlantia.. but, well, you can say me and the crew didn't much get along. The second was Olympia. Not a bad ship at all but something was just.. off. I feel comfortable here, so I doubt this'll be another notch on my bedpost."

"Alright, alright... anything else you'd like to share before we conclude?"

"Well, besides the fact I suck at Triad, can't hold my liquor and have little coordination for sports.. I think I'm as plain and basic as can get. Well, unless you want to see me fly. Just.. don't stand too close when I dock. I always make a mess when I do."

"Thanks you your time, we appreciate the information you supplied us. Have yourself a great evening."

"Working on it."


-- Presents stable memory function and fit shape. Able to supply answers as posed, and give little to no hassle. No violent demeanor apparent. Active and ready for duty. Report concluded.

Hilarious Inquisitor

Leni Da SporK PiraTe
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//Full Name//: Roosevelt Finch

//Gender//: Male

//Age//: 29

//Rank//: "Lieutenant"

//Position Aboard the ship//: Disguised Stow-away / Pilot

//Callsign//: //Only Applies to Pilots// Beast

//Personal History//
“So, Beast, is it? Seeing as how you joined us a little late in the game, and we have no file on you, I’m going to ask you a few questions”
“Shoot.”
“What colony are you from, and what was your occupation before joining the Colonial Fleet?”
“Virgon. Well, technically. My parents moved to Hiberian when I was born. It’s the only habitable moon in the Colonies and they were seeking freedom from religious persecution, or some s**t. Mind if I smoke?”
“Not in the slightest. Continue.”
“ I used to run supply vessels to and from Hiberian. You see, the moon was habitable, but not necessarily hospitable to our modern conveniences we all enjoy, y’know? Well some call them commodities and some call them necessities, but mostly it was just comfort. Not like, lounge chairs and down pillows, but more on the side of booze, power cells, and other yuppy comforts. I didn’t mind so much, especially considering side jobs and special needs cases. That’s where you make your money. Can’t live off bread alone, right? Regardless, I was the go-to for cross-atmosphere trafficking.”
“Interesting…”
“What the frak does that mean?”
“Nothing… was this legal?”
“For the most part. But, Hey! I served my time, friend. And twice over in ex-communication from the family. Well anyway, an ice cell in Hiberian’s jail circuit doesn’t exactly win over much respect with locals and doesn’t exactly help you fly under the radar, so that job was tanked. I joined up with an off-world tillium refinery and worked that for a couple of months, starting with grunt working and moving my way up to being a mule pilot for finished products. That was about a yea…..uh… four years ago. I ain’t real good at math, but I’m good with tactics, guns, and I know my scriptures. Mom pounded that into me for sure, not that it did any good when a nuke took out my family. After I had enough of disrespect, I hopped out of Beta two star system.”
“And then you joined the fleet?”
“Do you want to tell the frakking story, or is that my job?”
“No need for hostilities. Now, one final question, can you repeat to me the oath every officer takes when being promoted from enlistment.”
“I…Roosevelt Finch…blah blah blah. You know what? Frak you, and your report. We all hate the toasters as much as everyone else so get off my case…”
REPORT NOTES:
-Subject, Finch, appears touchy when questioned about fleet protocol. No particular failures in duty, but has a marked problem reading DRADIS and handling high force turns in a Viper.
-Officer was found floating in an un-powered Raptor in deep space. Tail markings of the ship: un-readable. Computer interface marks it as borne from the B. S. Columbia . Lt. Claims that it was under repairs during the Cylon attack and he jumped away. Body of a civilian was found in the ship as well.
-Lieutenant’s uniform was found with several bullet holes, no wounds on said officer. Claims state these as being from previous engagements and the uniform was ‘all he had left’.
- Aptitude tests indicate high level of capability especially under stress. Quick to remark, although usually ill-advised.
END OF REPORT





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