𝕭 𝖑 𝖊 𝖊 𝖉 ||Vampyre Profiles||

[insidelookingout]

xxxx

𝕭 𝖑 𝖊 𝖊 𝖉

Status:
►Under.Construction ◄

Concept Inspired By:
►The Original Role Play By Myself◄

Creator and Co-Owner:
►xMalicious Vendettax & My Wunderbar, Beautiful, Smexy Insidelookingout. ◄

Role Play Type:
►This Is A Fallen Angel x Vampyre Role Play Focusing On Homosexual Relationships ◄

Claimer:
►I, Malicious am the creator and owner of this role play. At the event that any post stolen from me and or if the concept is taken in any form or way as a remake with out my permission, one will face the wrath of a very pissed off Hacker. You have been warn. ◄

I.C Thread x x x x x x x The O O C Threadx x x x x x x Profiles : Fallen Angels x x x x x x xProfiles : Vampyres

[M i s t e r Histrionic]

ℑ𝔱 ℑ𝔰 𝔗𝔦𝔪𝔢 𝔗𝔬 𝔗𝔢𝔩𝔩 𝔐𝔶 𝔗𝔞𝔩𝔢...
𝔩𝔦𝔰𝔱𝔢𝔫 𝔴𝔢𝔩𝔩...

[align=center][img]malformed url[/img]
[b][size=18][color=color #2]「[/color][u][color=color #1]FIRST MIDDLE & LAST NAME[/color][/u][color=color #2]」[/color][/size][/b]

[i][size=11][color=color #4]"[[Quote Goes Here.]]"[/color][/size][/i][/align]


[list][list][list][list][list][list][list][list][list][list]
[color=color #4]✘[/color] [color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color][i][color=color #3][size=11]Centuries will never change this...[/size][/color][/i]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]» [/b] [/color][color=color #1][b]Forever My [color=color #3]N a m e[/color] Shall Be...[/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size]
[size=9][color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color] [color=color #4]First Middle And Last Name[/color][/size]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]» [/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]IAnd Yet It Seems Time Produces [color=color #3] N i c k n a m e ( s )[/color] For Everything...[/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size]
[size=9][color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color][color=color #4] [[[b]LIST[/b] all nicknames with explanations for them if you wish.]][/color][/size]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]» [/b] [/color][color=color #1][b]My love, I Can Assure You That [color=color #3]A g e[/color] Is Nothing But A Number[/b][/color][color=color #2]→[/color][/size]
[size=9][color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color] [color=color #4][[Type out the number]][/color][/size]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]» [/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]Thankfully A Persons [color=color #3]H e i g h t[/color] Shall Always Change, But So Does [color=color #3]W e i g h t[/color] Below[/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size][color=color #4]
[size=9][color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color][[Height in feet and/or centimeters and weight in pounds and/or kgs.]][/color][/size]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]» [/b] [/color][color=color #1][b]On This Miraculous Day Of Hell I Was [color=color #3]B o r n[/color] Below[/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size]
[size=9][color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color] [color=color #4][[Month and Day Only]][/color][/size]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]» [/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]Even If Centuries Have Past & Time Has Taken Its Toll My [color=color #4]G e n d e r[/color] Is Set In Stone[/b] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size]
[size=9][color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color][color=color #4]Male[/color][/size]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]» [/b] [/color][color=color #1][b]Don't You Know [color=color #3]S e x u a l i t y [/color] Is Such A Touchy Topic[/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size]
[size=9][color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color] [color=color #4][[Keep in mind this is a YAOI rp people]].[/color][/size]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]» [/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]The Years Have Changed My [color=color #3]A p p e a r a n c e[/color]... Do You Recognize Me?[/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size][color=color #4]
[color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color][size=9][[Links of character appearance, links in Paragraph form or a mere description. Do not half a** this part.]][/size][/color]


[color=color #4]✘[/color] [color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color][i][color=color #3][size=11][i]Hmph[/i], What A Pain In The a**... [/size][/color][/i]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]☸[/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]I Never Asked For This [color=color #3]G i f t[/color][/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size]
[size=9][color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color][color=color #4][[Name two powers you possess as well.]][/color][/size]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]☸[/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]Now I Know I Am Truly [color=color #3]C u r s e d[/color][/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size]
[size=9][color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color] [color=color #4][[The Name of the angel you are Bound to. Leave blank for now and delete this section if you are a Fallen Angel.]][/color][/size]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]☸[/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]Now I Know I Am Truly [color=color #3]Blessed[/color][/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size]
[size=9][color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color] [color=color #4][[The Name of the vampyre you are Bound to. Leave blank for now and delete this if you are a Vampyre.]][/color][/size]



[color=color #4]✘[/color] [color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color][i][color=color #3][size=11]There Is No Such Thing As Fairytales...[/size][/color][/i]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]✄ [/b] [/color][color=color #1][b]After Living For So Long, You're Bound To Have Your Own [color=color #3]O u t l o o k[/color] On Life...[/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size]
[size=9][color=color #4]][[State Your Personality In a Paragraph or More.]][/color][/size]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]✄ [/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]Close Your Eyes, Shield The Children; The [color=color #3]F r e a k s h o w[/color] Is About To Begin...[/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color] [/size][color=color #4]
[size=9][[In [b]FOUR[/b] Paragraphs or more, state your character's bio. Give me a good story people. No half a** s**t. If it is half done I will delete your pm and move on to someone else who deserves the part more.]] [/size][/color]



[color=color #4]✘[/color] [color=white]xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx[/color][i][color=color #3][size=11]Even Those Who Are Cast From Salvation Have Pleasures...[/size][/color][/i]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]✔[/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]Things I [color=color #3]A d o r e[/color] The Most...[/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size][color=color #4]
[size=9][[List at least five likes.]][/size][/color]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]✖[/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]I Can Not Help But [color=color #3]D e s p i s e[/color] This The Most...[/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size][color=color #4]
[size=9][[List at least five dislikes.]][/size][/color]

[size=11][color=color #2][b]☢[/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]Hidden [color=color #3]B e n e a t h [/color] The Surface[/b][/color] [color=color #2]→[/color][/size][color=color #4]
[size=9] [[In paragraph form list your fears and your deepest secret(s)]] [/size][/color]


[size=11][color=color #2][b] ↘[/b] [/color] [color=color #1][b]Behind Every [color=color #3]T r a g e d y[/color] There Is A Cause...[/b][/color][color=color #2]→[/color][/size][/size]
[/list][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list]
[align=center][size=18]▸ User Name◂[/size][/align]

[M i s t e r Histrionic]

「Muudercai Anayantzin Konstantin」

"The Memories Will Never Fade."

✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxCenturies will never change this...

» Forever My N a m e Shall Be... →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Muudercai Anayantzin Konstantin

» And Yet It Seems Time Produces N i c k n a m e ( s ) For Everything... →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Murdock:
Lazy little twits who shall remain nameless decided that my name was too long and took too much effort to pronounce. Thus they found 'Murdock' to be more suitable. Its...a adequate name I suppose. I still don't see what is so hard about 'Muudercai' though. To each his own, love...
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Muds:
I find this amusing. For a nickname...people created a nickname. And you call me lazy? I think not. It isn't a preferred name but yet again it is sufficient. I have little problem responding to it depending on who you are.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Muddies:
Why? Just why? Who the hell decided that I needed a pet name? When I find out who did it I will bash their little heads in. With some people, I will respond to this name. To others I will glare at you full heatedly and make you feel as if you were being pierced with a million needles.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx King Kon:
I am the Elder of this coven and I will make that known. Some of the younger members found that fact interesting and decided to make a little nickname with my last name. 'King Kon', huh? Very funny. Very ******** funny. Ah, I let it slide for I can take a joke. And anyway I rather be called King Kon then Dracula. Don't you dare start on that. Just because we share a b-day means nothing. Plus the count was a push over but that's a different story...

» My love, I Can Assure You That A g e Is Nothing But A Number→
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Eight Hundred and Ninety Nine Years of age.

» Thankfully A Persons H e i g h t Shall Always Change, But So Does W e i g h t Below →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxI stand in at 187.96 cm. and I weigh about 72.73 kgs.

» On This Miraculous Day Of Hell I Was B o r n Below →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx December First long ago...

» Even If Centuries Have Past & Time Has Taken Its Toll My G e n d e r Is Set In Stone →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxMale

» Don't You Know S e x u a l i t y Is Such A Touchy Topic →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Pansexual.

» The Years Have Changed My A p p e a r a n c e... Do You Recognize Me? →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxLong ago, I was a human. Heh, how long ago that was. There was so much I took for granted. So much I wanted to learn and see... Long ago, I had what I considered true beauty. Now that beauty is only held by human's around me. Though they pine over mines, it is simply artificial. I know that... Long ago, my humanity was stolen from me. Long ago, I was forced to become a fledgling to a woman I did not know. How easily I seemed to toss my emotions for my fiance away, but it was not my fault. It wasn't my fault... I would give up a million lives to join her if I could... Long ago, I grew bored of my Mistress' rules. I wanted a life again. I lusted for my life. Long ago, in a era not to far from this one, I had obtained my freedom. How sweet was it's nectar... but how bitter sweet as well. Freedom always starts with the price of loneliness... But I survived. Years ago, a vampyre came into my hands. What a pain was he. What a way to fill the void... Others followed soon after and loneliness faded away. Months ago, I was feeling anxious and on guard. Something wasn't right. Every step I took felt like it was monitored, but by what? It made me curious. It made me wonder. Weeks ago, I thought it was just because I was tired. Recently I thought I was insane. That's right. I'm just as nuts as that angel that fell straight into my arms. Head first...



✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxHmph, What A Pain In The a**...

☸ I Never Asked For This G i f t →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxWater Bending
I can manipulate anything that contains water. Be it the ocean, rain, or the blood within a person body. In a way it makes me a blood bender I presume. If I over use my power I will go feral and lose control. I usually black out around then as my instincts take control... It is a interesting power indeed...
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxEarth Bending
Its pretty self explanatory. I didn't find out about this...gift until a few years back. I have yet to master it, but I am close.

☸ Now I Know I Am Truly C u r s e d →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Damnation finally has a name. I have found it to be called Raziel.


✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxThere Is No Such Thing As Fairytales...

✄ After Living For So Long, You're Bound To Have Your Own O u t l o o k On Life... →
I am very realistic, leaving little room for what if or maybe. Why should we sugar coat s**t? We know how the world is. Do not lead me around the bush. If I ask a question answer truthfully. That is all I want. My anger is a vicious thing, I must admit. I will not listen to reason and if you push your limit I will strike at you with ill intent. Sometimes, I lose control and if that is the cause I suggest you run before I go for your head. I try to keep my cool honest, but some people just annoy me I can be rather carefree when I am alone and when I am in the presence of those I adore I can be relatively pleasant. When I find people I adore I keep them close. I can and most likely will be possessive near them and will kill to keep them at my side and my side alone. I suppose this can be seen as selfishness in a way but I have never said I wasn’t selfish. I can’t stand people who talk on and on and on about absolutely nothing. I hate listening to them because I waste precious minutes of my life doing so. I am not being mean; I am merely stating the truth. I do not want someone in my life that is utterly useless and I will make this know before any kind of relationship is formed. I am sarcastic all the time. Why? I don’t know. But I do know that almost every sentence that comes from me is laced with it. I am lazy. I don’t like to do something that requires more effort than normally. If forced to, I will sigh and probably say the most infamous line to leave my lips: “What a pain.” I can be nice, caring, etc. It all depends on what you make of me dear.

✄ Close Your Eyes, Shield The Children; The F r e a k s h o w Is About To Begin... →
I was born in at within the twelfth century. If you ask me who I was born to, I can tell you two nobles. My father was named Lucian and my mother was named Hextilda. I don’t remember much from my childhood but I remember enough to know that I loved them very much. I still do. My mother held long brunette hair and eyes like mine; her skin was pale and her lips full and red. I remember always doing little silly things just to see her smile. She was a head strong woman who detested the role of women for her own role. Many men detested this about her but my father implored it. I loved to see them debate about different things. It would start off with such heated words but in the end it would always with them showing how much they truly cared for each other. Those memories are strong, and so I keep them close. My father was a noble from Russia and my mother from Scotland. My accent as a child was less than…entertaining. I remember how frustrated I used to get when people made fun of it. I also remember how my parents used to laugh at me when I did get upset. They were good times. Things back then were simpler. We didn’t have all these issues that humans had to day and I wish, even if just for a moment, I wish I could go back… But I can’t. No, that life was stolen from me long ago. There is no going back. When I was twelve years old my father took me to meet a girl he stated would be my fiancé. What? Twelve is too young? You must remember this is a different time from yours my dear. Things were very different indeed.

She stood there with bright hazel eyes, long blond hair and a smile that welcomed me, a stranger. I think it was a child’s curiosity that led me to find interest in my eleven year old fiancé. But as time grew it was more than that. Annina was fragile as a child. She would always run behind me if something scared her and when I showed her there was nothing to worry about she would laugh at herself. She was always laughing… I remember that clearly. Time after time she would beg me to read her tales that my mother read me as well as my father. Her father did not approve me doing so, for what woman needed to know how to read? I didn’t bother with him however. My mother was my influence and women had the right to understand as much as any man. My thinking was too far ahead for my time but that is how I was. When I was fifteen years old, Annina led me into the woods. I followed her hesitantly; there was something about the woods that…I never liked. I felt as if I was always being watched… Even now as I speak memories flood back to me. But whether or not I will share them is a different tale indeed. I suppose I shall. I have nothing to hide. Plus, speaking of them aloud will keep them around longer. We stayed in the area on the edge of a brook until the sun came to set. It was then that something caught the corner of my eye. I was quick to push Annina behind me as two figures approached us. A woman and a man came out of the words smiling at us but I assure you the smiles were not welcoming. They circled us as if we were prey taunting us and teasing Annina for hiding behind me. With quick thinking, I directed their attention away from us and managed to take Annina far away from them. It wasn’t the end however.

When we returned to the village, I told my mother about what had happened. It wasn’t as if I could hide it. Annina was so terrified that she refused to release her hold on me until her father pried her away. My mother was…unusually interested with them. She wanted me to describe them in detail and as I did it seemed that her face turned pale. My father made me stop and sent me to my room telling me that I needed my rest. But as I retreated I could hear my mother sob silently. For the vampyres were upon us. At the time, I really didn’t believe in mystical beings. Like magic and demons, I thought it was all fake; stories to keep people in line. Even my mother was skeptical so to see her like that… It made me wonder. But the wonder only lasted for so long. The thought of the beings quickly faded to the back of my mind and years went by. From fifteen to twenty, my bond with Annina grew. She became my best friend as well as my lover. I was there to comfort her whenever she needed it and she was there to make me smile. I would give her everything she wanted and more even if she did not needed it. Her smiles were the only thing I treasured. I think that frustrated her at times for when she wished to get me a present I would refuse only to guilt her into accepting mine. We were a selfless couple, never putting one in front of the other and always freely accepting the love we received. You may think I will go on to say that if I could bring her back I would. I would never. Why would I? Annina is at peace now. In a plane I will never see. Let her reap the fruits of the afterlife. I will take what I can from her memory here and move on knowing one of us escaped damnation…

The two nights before our wedding…I took Annina to her favorite place in the woods. We didn’t speak; we just stayed there… She began dancing, my Annina. She smiled her last smiles and walked into my arms before whispering three little words. And then…Hell. It is all a blurry… They came out of the woods like they did all those years ago and just like then I stood infront of Annina. But this time it did no good. They attacked us and I heard Annina scream. When I turned towards her the woman latched on to my neck sinking her fangs deeply into my jugular. My own scream rang out as the pain filled my body and soon I was released, free to hit the floor. I saw Annina fall before my face unable to move but still conscious. She was crying, not for herself but for me. Though the pain was great I reached out and was able to place my hand on her cheek. ‘I’ll be with you…’ She smiled filled with terror and pain before she closed her eyes for the last time. My eyes soon followed however I was far from dead. My poor, Annina… My sweet poor Annina… I would never be with her in death. And though I try to think of her in a better place I know in my heart she will never be at rest until I am with her. But at least she isn’t here. She lived her life and that was that. I feel no remorse for her passing. We both knew we were meant to die. There was no way around it. Я люблю тебе моя дорога… To this day and forever more.

Pain was the first thing I felt as I became to come to. It wasn’t excruciating, but it was uncomfortable. For an eternity, or so it seemed, I rested within that pain until it decided to let up little by little. My fingers twitched at first and then my lips parted and took in the air that tasted so foreign. Where was I? I opened my eyes half way and looked around the room to the women that so eagerly looked upon me. As a reflex, I growled at the closeness of the women to me and they squealed in amusement as they backed away. I didn’t move any more as I my eyes caught sight of the light. Never in my life have I seen anything like it. It was as if it was projecting its own rainbow for the selected few to see. I almost started to reach out to attempt to touch it only to have my attention pulled away. Something shifted under me, causing my body to tense up and look towards the person holding me. She was smiling at me. A smile that a mother gives her newborn child, a smile that should have made me calmed my tension. However there was more to that smile then she let on and I knew it. I took a minute to study her face and go over every line and definition of it. Blue eyes, black hair, porcelain skin and a subtle threat; I did not know this woman but I knew she has something to do with the reason I was currently there. I opened my mouth then closed it again. Once more, I did the same. I furrowed my brow in frustration as my voice failed to comply with my wish. The women to the side began to giggle at my aggravation however they were quickly stopped by the words of the one that held me. I wait for a moment after she scolded the others then opened my mouth to speak. I was cut off yet again.

“My, my, what pretty eyes you have my dear…” My question was quickly pushed away as I was caught up in the mere tone of the woman’s voice. I listened to sounds around me I never heard, looked at things I’ve never seen. What was wrong with me? “Tell me, are you thirsty?” My eyes shot to her and suddenly the burning sensation my body kept tabs on came to the forefront of my mind. I grabbed my throat and gasped softly before looking at her with confusion and fear. What was going on? I could understand, I really didn’t care too. I just wanted it to stop… “There, there my dear…” She turned her head to the side and revealed her neck to me. “Come, drink.” I didn’t hesitate. Lunging up I sunk my teeth—fangs rather—into her neck and indulged myself in the crimson liquid I longed for. The women around us laughed hysterically at my actions but I paid them little mind. The taste of blood was…wonderful. I adored it from the moment I allowed the liquid to hit my tongue and even to this day I admire it. She placed her hand against my shoulder and dug her claws in slightly to tell me enough but I didn’t stop feeding. That was, until I choked. I pulled away suddenly and began to cough as I sought the urge to clear my wind pipe. At this point I had gotten used to becoming the item of humor. She wiped the blood away from my lips and smiled at me softly with narrowed eyes. “Muudercai Anayantzin Konstantin… Do you remember who you are?” Did I? No, I didn’t have a clue. She only giggled at me when I shook my head but didn’t press the matter. Finally I found my voice and asked who she was. Silence filled the room but she kept smiling. “Why, I am your new mistress, Muudercai.”

Within the first weeks of my new life I was progressing much faster than expected. I was curious and eager to learn. For the first weeks I knew only two things for sure. 1) I longed for the taste of blood. I completed me. It filled me… And 2) my Mistress Lacrymosa was the most important thing in my life and I longed to please her. What is it…with fledglings and their creators? I never understood why we felt the need to please them so much, to give them everything we had. It seems so stupid now… It was so stupid. Because once that period of experiencing new things was over, you found out where you were placed. And I was nothing more than something to keep Lacrymosa’s hands from getting dirty. I was a gifted one, a vampire that held powers that differ from the norm… The moment Lacrymosa found out about it the joy of my new life faded fast. I remember. I was by a river with the same women that were there when I awoke, the same women that I saw as sisters strangely enough. They were playing in the water as I watched from the side. They were teasing me and taunting me to join them but I refused. …The moment one of them splashed water at me, I acted. Before I could understand what I was doing, I had rose up to my feet and began to contort the water back towards her, hitting her in the face. I was horrified that I had attacked one of my own and it seemed that they knew not what to think. I was quickly taken to my mistress and forced to repeat my actions for her to see. From that day forward my training began.

Lacrymosa pushed me over the edge, dragging me to the point of death in order for me to learn. She didn’t care about my wellbeing any more, only what I could do for her. I attempted to rationalize with myself, for there must have been a reason my mistress was like this no? Perhaps this was my role. Maybe I should be grateful towards her for pushing me so… So many excuses I provided for her, I could lose count easily after the hundredth one. One day, Lacrymosa pulled me into her room and told me to sit at her feet. I did. She reached out and ran her fingers through my hair. “What would you do for me?” Anything. “Do you mean it, my dear Muudercai?” Yes, I answered. Anything. I wish I would have said no. God how I wish… She went on to tell me of how those women I came to know as my sisters, my family. She wanted them gone. Out of picture forever… Why? I didn’t understand. But…I didn’t want to disobey either… So I went after them but did not kill them. I couldn’t; my memories of my past were gone but I still had a strong since of loyalty. I let them go and they decided to grant me one reward. With a kiss from the eldest my memories were unlocked and one came forth showing me the family I held dear. When the moment faded I placed my hands over my eyes as I tried to focus on her words. They would all come back over time. All of them? Really? Who was I? I still…can’t answer that. I watched them run away into the forest before collapsing to my knees and holding my head. Memories…what good were they? Did I need them? …Did I want them…?

I was punished severely for going against Lacrymosa’s words and with each lash and strike a memory returned. Mama, my father, my home…I remembered. And it was painful. But not as painful as the memories of Annina. It became so painful that Lacrymosa didn’t have to punish me. The seizures were enough… I never disobeyed again but the memories didn’t stop coming back. With each one the pain increased and I was forced to learn how to block out the pain with each memory. That didn’t stop anything. Lacrymosa was harsh in training me and never allowed me a moment to rest. I became…tired. I became angry. One night in particular I didn’t meet her standards. She was quick to take my blood as punishment and something within me snapped. I began to manipulate the water in her body, her blood… Before I knew it I learned to blood bend. One would think that would be the end of Lacrymosa’s hell but it wasn’t. Now here’s question of the century. Why did put up with it? Because I was learning; it may not sound like much but I refused to be out on my own with no knowledge. I would do me no good. So I remained with my mistress and stayed true and loyal to her…for three centuries. For three centuries I put up with it. And then? I got sick of it. I knew enough now. I could go out on my own. However, it wasn’t that simple… Lacrymosa was …possessive as any vampyre would be of the one they created. And when I spoke of wishing to leave she brushed it off. As if I was nothing more than a joke. …I’d show her what kind of joke I really was…

Freedom came at a price I was willing to take. For in order to gain it not only did I have to challenge my mistress, I had to kill her as well. If I did not she would never let me go. I knew that… So we fought and for the first time I saw how thick my love for pain was. I was a damn sadist. The moment the fight was initiated I took little time to manipulate her blood. I must have blocked out the memories, for I know it was…a horrid sight my mistress’ corpse. I didn’t cry, I couldn’t; but I did hold her as she died. I wouldn’t leave her to die alone. Just like I wouldn’t leave Annina… It was funny. She acted like my mother in her last moments. I wish she would have been like that in the first place. This is…depressing. Let’s speed up shall we? I moved around from place to place in the world seeing all that I wanted too. Everything filled my head and yet I wanted to learn more. I needed to learn more. I decided at one point however to settle down. It wasn’t supposed to be for too long, just a few years. That may seem long for some of you but for me it was just as long as a month. I went back to my home land for the first time in years and brought the land my family once occupied… Our old mansion still stood and even though it needed work I was happy to finally be home…

Never did I assume that I would be staying longer within that mansion that I was born into. No, why would I? I was never one for socializing and even when I did it was mostly for food. If someone would have told me that I was to lead my own coven one day I would have rolled my eyes and scoffed. But one event led to another, an unlikely event I might add. For who would have thought that the first member of this coven would have rested right under my home? Literately… One day I awoke to a rather interesting urge. Something or rather someone was calling out to me. Naturally, I ignored it. But the more I ignored it the more the urge to find them grew. I found myself studying the link foremost. I was no fool; who would run into a situation without knowledge? Certainly not I and although I thought simply studying the link would cure the urge it made it worse. It was a vampyre that was calling me. Could you believe it? A vampyre was on my lands. I was irritated that someone would dare to defile the land I was born on with the flesh of another damned and I wanted the beast of burden out. I suppose it would seem mean of me to call him a beast of burden now but I never fail to remind him of how annoying it was to rescue his a**. I allowed the vampyre to draw me in and show me the area in which he was imprisoned. Once I was above it, I couldn’t help but wonder if it was really worth it. I mean, if he was locked up—for god knows how long mind you—then just maybe it would be best to leave him the dirt, no? And yet I was a prideful Nosferatu; I was sure that if problems arose I could detain the imprisoned vampire.

So I dug him up. That iron casket was a pain in my a** to lift and bring back to the mansion for sure. I don’t think I’ve ever cursed that much in my life but I did it. I brought the stupid thing to the court room before opening it up and taking a look at the beast in side. So this was the one that called for me… Poor fellow was staked and all. And yet he was still alive? How interesting… I looked over the stake that protruded from his chest with the upmost care. So he was damned to suffer for all eternity…What a fitting punishment as if a vampyre isn’t already damned from the start. I rolled my eyes at the thought and then placed my hand around the base of the stake. To pull it out or let him stay. That was the question. For what did I have to profit from his life? Nothing. What did I have to lose? …Nothing. Pushing the thoughts out of my mind I slowly began to remove the stake from his heart. Once the object was fully removed I stepped back for it was very clear what would happen when the blood lost was taken into account. He would strike. I had little problem with him taking my blood for I had planned ahead and taken in much more blood then I needed. What I did have a problem with however was how he attacked me. Before I could move, the vampyre lunged and latched on to my throat; holding me to him in order to keep me from escaping. I had to literately force myself not to fight him. It would do me no good. At least I was able to gain information by his appearance. He was of Asian descent, Japanese; who ever held dominance over him truly did a number on him from the scars that rested against his skin. Though I am sure some of you would like to hear that I felt sorry for him, I didn’t. I still couldn’t have cared less.

He was a fool for reaching out to whoever was close to him. He should have been lucky I was not the one that placed him down there. I waited until he had finally calmed down and released me to cough up the blood that had risen as he took my own. Little notice was given to the pain in my neck as I looked upon him, from a distance of course. I wasn’t surprised at the affect my blood had on him. For one who had just awoken, the taste of a vampyre’s blood would cause quite shock especially from a Nosferatu. I licked the blood on my hand away then placed my fingers lightly against the wound on my neck. That little heifer… My own eyes bleed crimson in irritation though I was able to hold myself back even if slightly. A vampyre who has gone through whatever he had gone through was bound to be powerful when awakened. I could have easily taken him, but it would have been such a bother. More than what I was willing to put up with. I did feel slight pity for a moment if not less. The fool was vulnerable; he truly did not belong in this time and that was apparent. And I could tell that he could not bring himself to look at me either. Not that I expected him too; most elders would have killed him already. Why? Well for one fact the mere issue that he was on my territory, the second he had taken blood from me without my consent well verbal anyway and the third reason was simply the fact that he breached a boundary. I watched him as he lifted his head and looked around the room. I wondered what Lacrymosa would do to him if he was in her mitts. The mere thought made me shudder though not visibly. I knew he wouldn’t speak first. Once more another action on my part. I sighed at the thought then cocked my head to the side allowing that long streak of white hair to cover my right eye as my voice rang out. “なんという痛みであることでしょう。" “What a pain.”

Poor little vampyre, it seemed as if he wasn’t getting a break at all. The pain that hit his body was visible but did not surprise me. He would pass out soon enough though it seemed as if he was fighting it with everything he was. A pain in the a** and stubborn? Great, it was just what I needed. Honestly, I wasn’t angry with the vampyre. I was irritated that he forced the urge on me to go find him. I was irritated that that same urge made me dig a stupid hole until I found him. I was irritated that I had to carry that stupid casket with him in it back to the mansion then put the stupid thing down. I was irritated that he lunged at me and bit me. I was urked that he took my blood even though I figured he would and I was irritated that he basically wasted a day or so from my life. But I wasn’t angry, if you can believe that. I could hear his bones snap into place as he stretched them. I couldn’t help but wince slightly. That couldn’t have been fun or pleasant. I couldn’t help but find irony in the fact that my voice was the first one he heard; especially since I attempt to refrain from using it. I could see him fighting off the pain to some degree, though it was useless. He was bound to pass out though I knew from the language of his body told me plainly that he did not trust me. Ungrateful brat, but I can’t say I would trust anyone either if I was in his position.

How long did it take him to realize that I was speaking his native tongue? Five minutes. By then I had already figured that he was conflicting between another. So he knew something else, hmm? English perhaps? Who knew or cared for that matter. Not I. It was not the time for it. Not at all. I narrowed my eyes softly as he spoke or at least attempted too for the first bit. ‘Gururi…’ Spinning. I figured he was talking about his vision. But then again it was bound to be like that. His next action made me arch an eyebrow. He was…smirking. Wow, he was delusional. I rolled my eyes at it as my arms folded themselves against my chest. He was definitely something else I would give him that. ‘Taegatai…’ It’s unbearable. No s**t. But at least he was able to gain the volume of his voice back. There was no hint of the pain that coursed through him but it was obvious. He was going to drop within a second and yet I made no move towards him. No reason to, and yet he caught my full attention once more as he spoke yet again. ‘Watashi . . . no namae wa Tai desu.’ My name is Tai. Well at least I didn’t have to call him ‘it’ anymore. What a silly little vampyre… Was he still fighting? Keh, ready for it? Five, four, three, two… ‘Domo arigato…’ And then he collapsed. I had yet to move from the place I stood as Tai laid on the floor. But after ten minutes I figured I needed to get him off the floor. Sighing I moved to his side before picking him up and shaking my head. They can put him in a coma for centuries but they can’t put a shirt on him. Joy.

“ばか…” ‘Idiot.’ I whispered lightly under my breath. I didn’t think twice about placing him in one of the rooms. Why didn’t I kill him? Why? I didn’t know him. What good would it do me to kill him? Besides at the moment it appeared as if the only thing he was capable of doing was irritating me and collapsing. With that said I placed him into bed and left him there not disturbing his sleep as I went to my own room and retreated. For two days he rested undisturbed and for two days I went about my day occasionally coming back to the vampyre and checking up on him. At one point in time I had wondered why I didn’t just toss him back in the ditch I took him out of. But then again it would have been a bigger pain if he would have sought revenge for that. The thought was humorous though. There was one moment where I actually did take the time to make sure that no wounds remained. I couldn’t help but look over each cut and bruise that was on the man’s torso. What did he do to get into so much trouble? Apparently something horrid and because of this I would have to be on guard around him. Even though this thought went through my head I almost knew that he wouldn’t do much. Although, it didn’t hurt to be careful. Did I plan to let him stay at my mansion? If you would have asked me then my answer would have been as simple as black and white. ‘Hell no.’ I wasn’t a caretaker and I certainly wasn’t a babysitter. At least back then I wasn’t…

It wasn’t until night fell on the second day did my guest wake. I wasn’t in the mansion at the time but in the field that surrounded my home. I was simply thinking. I always did that and I wasn’t going to let an unwanted intrusion detour me from continuing my normal routine. I already knew the pain I would go through, having to explain everything to the other. Although that wasn’t the thing on my mind… Who knows what was on my mind... I laid in the tall grass with my eyes such before my ears caught on to the sound of something stirring. So sleeping beauty decided to get up? Wonderful. I was starting to wonder how long it would take. I listened to him get up and shuffle around the room. Needless to say I figured he was looking for some clothes. Once that was taken care of, though I had to say that I almost feared seeing what he had on. The moment I heard him come down the stairs and enter the kitchen, I almost jumped up. I would have been very upset if he, oh let’s say set the mansion on fire. Just maybe. And yet I was able to hold myself back surprisingly. That wasn’t to say I didn’t find some sort of relief when he left the room. His footsteps came to the front porch and there he stood. At first I figured he didn’t sense me and kept it like that. But after twenty minutes or so I got restless.

Silence filled the area before the Q & A session began. What era are you from? What country? Do you have a thought of how long it’s been since you were imprisoned? Why are you here? I was right when I figured that he wouldn’t bother to answer any of my questions regarding full details of his imprisonment, not like I asked. If I was truly interested I would have but sadly I wasn’t. I supposed that any vampyre of my age would know of Tai and his history. But I was never one to care about the history of my race. The only thing that mattered was my own past. When I was done asking the questions I saw fit I allowed myself to rise up from grass. The moment he told me what era he was from I couldn’t help but laugh. What kind of punishment was this? Here I was stuck with a being from a time of no technology and no true society. Great. If there was a god he was an a*****e. Tai was not amused as I was though, not surprising. The questions then pointed to me. How old I was? Why I didn’t kill him, why I dug him up; he seemed shocked by my careless answers especially when he compared them to my age. Silence filled the area after he asked for my name. I started not to answer but I guessed he needed a name. Muudercai. Short simple and to the point; I would tell him very little about myself. Even today I am not willing to share my past. I think Tai is the only one who knows bits and parts even though I still haven’t told him a lot.

The vampyre knew little of the world in 1993 and I knew, because of the fact that I was the one who awoken him, I was stuck with teaching him. I was far from nice however. Lacrymosa always found the need to teach me by keeping me on my feet. It was something I thank her every day for doing. If Tai was ever going to survive—and get off my back—I had to do the same. I had fun doing it; I’m not going to lie. He put his finger in an electrical socket; he placed his hand on the stove as I turned on the flame, he put his head under the shower head as I directed him how to turn on the water and I could go on. He would snap at me and call me an a*****e but if I had to teach him I was going to do it my way. He got over it and learned rather quickly. But I still tease him about it. Just for the hell of it. I remember how he came to me one day in a awkward motion asking to stay. At first I almost declined. It would have been smarter for him to simply find out who he was. But he didn’t take to kindly to my suggestion. Who was I to stop him? It wasn’t as if he was a problem. After a moment I agreed. And he’s been here ever since. Loneliness was something I was accustomed too. I knew it like the back of my hand and savored it for everything it was. But as time passed I found I didn’t long for it as much as I once had. That relationship purely based on survival turned into friendship then one based on lust.

Where was I? I was in the field staring up at the sky when the angels fell. My own fell directly into my arms and for a moment all I did was take in his presence. That was, before finding him to be an easy meal. I leaned in to bit his neck only to have the tables turned. If there is a God let me tell you this. He has a twisted since of humor…

✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxEven Those Who Are Cast From Salvation Have Pleasures...

✔ Things I A d o r e The Most... →

☇ Blood:
I love the taste. I love the color. Over the years I have become more addicted to the liquid then anything else in the world. If you ask me what I love the answer is clear. I love blood. If I am denied it I will find a way to get it. You can not keep me away from it so don't try. No matter who it belongs, the blood will be mine. And I will enjoy every bit as I wipe if off of my stained lips...
☇ Tai:
Its fun to bother him. But I digress, the vampyre has been rather good company and that is something I can honor. Though It was a pain in my a** to dig his godforsaken body up, restore him and deal with his irritating manners until he learned the ways of this world; there is no one else I would have at my side to lead this coven. Don't get it twisted loves, I may like him but I assure you I will kick that fledglings a** if he gets on my nerves. Little Heifer...heh.
☇ Food:
I don't need it true, but I enjoy it. I may not be human anymore but I still hold some traits from when I was one. I remember always stuffing my face and my family laughing at me... I don't think I like it for the taste, though that's a bonus. No, I enjoy eating because it brings up memories I have long forgotten. As well as those I enjoy revisiting from time to time...
☇ My Violin & My Cello:
Old habits die hard indeed. When I was a human I used to play instruments in order to make myself feel better, to finish off a good day or simply to amuse myself. It has yet to change to this day. In the mansion we reside in, you can often hear one of these instruments play when our home is absolutely silent. I find that is the best time to do so. Or you can hear it when I am upset, thinking and even happy. They show the emotions I fail to show to others openly.
☇ Books:
The perk about moving with time is that things never get old. Knowledge keeps growing and so does the expansion of books. In my room I have two walls dedicated to books regardless of the fact that I have quite a hefty library in the mansion. My face is always in a book; horror, historical, fiction, non-fiction, political, etc. I can never get enough.Most likely you will catch me with a text book however. The learning process never ends my love. Never.
☇ The Rubik's Cube:
When I first got the cube I was astounded by the little puzzle. I took my time solving it, deliberately aligning each and every line one after the other. It took me a week to finish that way and when it was complete I messed it up again. It took me two full seconds to solve the cube the second time. However, I remained hooked ever since. I have about ten different Rubik's puzzles sprawled out around my room. Don't be surprised if you see me with one in my hand.
☇ Languages:
Russian, Ukrainian, Lithuanian, Mandarin, German; no language is spared from my curiosity. I am currently learning Latin but I find that it is harder then I thought it would be. Perhaps I can get a tutor...? Having the knowledge of so many languages is a bit... Well, let's just say that it can be amusing. There are times where I wake up and instead of the language everyone understands, I start speaking Mandarin. Sometimes I happens when I am angry. When I start to rant it is never known what language will come spewing from my lips.
☇ Pain:
I guess this is what I get for spending all those years with Lacrymosa... I can not lie, I do enjoy seeing people in pain at times though I am prompt to stop those thoughts. When I am manipulating people I sometimes make it the most painful thing they will ever experience. I try so hard when my anger gets away from me to keep from losing control. If I do you should run before your pain becomes the only thing I long for.


✖ I Can Not Help But D e s p i s e This The Most... →

☁ ☇ Fledglings:
I cannot stand fledglings for the most part. Some of them are acceptable, true. But the rest? Blood hungry, lusting little snots that can't control their instinctual desires. I am not a baby sitter. I have had fledglings come to me for assistance in the past and each one of them have been denied. Which leaves me to wonder why I put up with Misha...
☁ ☇ Ignorance:
From a human I can only expect it. But if you a vampyre I expect you to know better. After all these years alive you should have some knowledge on how things really work. I guess this goes into the reason why I don't like fledglings either. They don't take time to learn until stuff is forced down their throat. The morons. They get on my nerves... I digress, there are too many things in this world to try and see; closing your mind to everything just makes you rather stupid.
☁ ☇ Noise:
I suppose I can take some of it. However, needless arguments, unneeded screaming, loud insults; they drive me nuts. If I have to bend your mouth shut I will do so. Just keep in mind that that will not be your only punishment for disturbing my peace. In short, my dear, shut up. Just shut up. I do not care about your past lives, I don't care about the family you left behind or why you became a vampire. If I ask I want to know but if not the keep your mouth shut. That also goes on to say that I do not like talking so much. Mindless chatter anyway.
☁ ☇ Having Others Disobey:
I, myself, do not take much interest in rules. They are too much work, far more than I asked for. So when I say something I mean it. Why would I make a rule without a purpose? Truly the coven should know me better than that by now. And yet there are times where they still disobey. Oh well, it lets me show them how much I truly enjoy their pain.
☁ ☇ Being Called Old:
I know I am old, I don't have a problem with that. However, when people make comments about my age that are degrading I find myself ready to snap their necks. Yes love, I am old. But with age comes wisdom. And trust that I have more wisdom in my brain then you will ever gain in your life time.
☁ ☇ Memories:
There are some good memories. Those from when I was a human are the best especially the ones with Annina. However, I hold bad ones as well and sometimes to get to the ones I adore I must go through the ones I wish to forget...


☢ Hidden B e n e a t h The Surface →
Fire.Within it, I can't breath. I can't think. I freeze up as my nightmare comes over me. I am truly vulnerable. Even within the slightest way. The very first time I bended Lacrymosa's blood I was punished. By that I mean she would set me on fire until I almost reached the point of death before allowing me to heal and start all over again. Now that is hell. I tend to push past my fear however if I am surrounded by fire with little way out I will freeze with terror. Memories. The pain is getting worse. I can no longer predict what will trigger them nor do I try. The last memory that came to me left me in a coma like state for a week. It was amusing to see the others worried to a degree. However, the pain felt when I awoke was anything but enjoyable. I fear that one day a memory will return with pain I can not handle. And it will be the end of me. I wouldn't mind dying but not that way...not yet. My secret? Heh, you'll find out...



↘ Behind Every T r a g e d y There Is A Cause...→

▸xMalicious Vendettax◂

[M i s t e r Histrionic]

「Tai Aderyn Halifax」
"Ohne dich zähl ich die Stunden. Mit dir stehen die Sekunden. Lohnen nicht."
"Without you I count the hours. With you the seconds stand still. They aren't worth it.”

✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxCenturies will never change this...

» Forever My N a m e Shall Be... →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tai Aderyn Halifax.
» IAnd Yet It Seems Time Produces N i c k n a m e ( s ) For Everything... →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxHeifer: I don’t understand how Muurdecai came up with such a name and I don’t really enjoy it either. Still- I know it’s nothing really offensive in nature. That still doesn’t make me find it any less annoying. I still have trouble comprehending why anyone would use anything but my simple, three-letter name.

» My love, I Can Assure You That A g e Is Nothing But A Number→
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Seven-hundred and thirty-eight.

» Thankfully A Persons H e i g h t Shall Always Change, But So Does W e i g h t Below →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxFive-foot Eleven, a trim, but strong one-hundred and fourty-nine pounds.

» On This Miraculous Day Of Hell I Was B o r n Below →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx November 23rd.
» Even If Centuries Have Past & Time Has Taken Its Toll My G e n d e r Is Set In Stone →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxMale

» Don't You Know S e x u a l i t y Is Such A Touchy Topic →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx I've shared a bed with a woman on an occasion or two, but men catch my eye.

» The Years Have Changed My A p p e a r a n c e... Do You Recognize Me? →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx"We are searchers, forever looking for the uncomfortable truth of our human condition, searching within ourselves for that which is unclean, uncertain or impure- for that which has no name. By looking at the monsters we create, we gain new insights into our 'darker half'. These fiends express what we are at the deepest and most inaccessible levels of our unconscious. Since time immemorial, they have given us a connection to our animal self, the fulfillment of an unadulterated emotional vitality, and the promise of a brutal justice. Just as the hero of legend must descend into the pit of Purgatory to face the tormentor, overcome personal weakness, and finally be cleansed in order to return home with the gift of fire, so must we descend into the depths of our own soul and return to life with the secrets we have won. That is the real journey of Prometheus. That is the meaning of the myth. Only by embarking on such a journey can we discover our true selves and look into the mirror."


✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxHmph, What A Pain In The a**...


☸ I Never Asked For This G i f t →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxMy own mind is a powerful one.
I can take control of the minds of others- I can bend them to do my will and can force people to betray their own bodies.
I can possess another, detatching my spirit from my own flesh and using the body of another as my own.
And, I like most vampires, my strength is noteworthy for how heightened it is compared to a human’s.

☸ Now I Know I Am Truly C u r s e d →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Spare me. I belong to no one.


✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxThere Is No Such Thing As Fairytales...

✄ After Living For So Long, You're Bound To Have Your Own O u t l o o k On Life... →
There was a time, long ago, when I was happy. Now it is a very rare sight to see a smile, no matter how small, upon my face. It is the result of a hard life. The way I act and the way I live now is much influenced by how I was treated before this point. The emotional baggage I carry is greater than most. There is, however, a substantial difference between someone with similar baggage and myself. Just like the smile that infrequently graces my lips, I do not tell often of my woes or let that baggage be known, whether verbally or through expressions. In fact, I hardly speak at all.
I’ve found through my years that listening is a great deal more useful than always talking one’s head off, and that, among other things, has made me into a rather anti-social individual. I have problems with trust and confiding in people, but I will say that I am patient- tolerant and loyal. To the few people I do rely on, I am a devoted friend.
I can have quite the temper, though like everything else, it is bottled up. That being said, when my emotions do flow about, they do so in a violent manner. That in itself can tick me off.
Oddly enough, I tend to be rather curious about things that catch my attention.
Above all, I like to be in control of situations. I respect rules, but cannot stand when people feel they can order me around as if I will do anything they wish like some kind of obedient dog.
If anything, you should follow my example.

✄ Close Your Eyes, Shield The Children; The F r e a k s h o w Is About To Begin... →

It was the feudal era of Japan when I came into this world- taken in by a kind, older man and woman who didn't look down upon a b*****d newborn of a foreign male and a Japanese woman from the north. The old man's name was Takanori, and the woman's name was Izumi . . . thus, the simple name I have now was created. I remember them still as the kindest people I have ever known- the warmest smile on each of their faces no matter how dreary a day. They showed me the most pure form of kindness and nothing else. I was scorned by my village but they never left my side. I loved them.
Such a love was bound to be short-lived. I learned what death was at a very young age, as the only father I had, Takanori, died of natural causes at age seventy-seven when I was just six years old. Izumi was never the same since that day. After years of being taken care of by her, I was the one who kept her going- who encouraged her to eat, sleep and live, rather than dwell on father’s passing. Izumi told me everyday that she loved me, with that hoarse, elderly-woman voice of hers, and when she became weaker still, she reassured me that it was not my fault that her heath was failing her. I always nodded to her in response- to reassure her that I believed what she told me, yet I truly felt remorse in my heart every day as she continued to . . . die. Seven years after my father's death, Izumi finally passed as well, and I was left alone in the small village that only jeered my name. An echo of loneliness filled my soul and I remembered what it felt like to be alone. It was a feeling that I couldn't stand to bear again.

I became rather isolated in the small village that was, in itself, remote. I made a handful of friends, but some came and went just like the passing days. Only two stuck with me, and I with them. We became farmers together and tended to a few rice paddies on the outskirts of the village, just getting by in life without too much hardship. As the years gained on us and I reached my eighteenth birthday, one of the two had married and started a family. The other had gained an interest in a woman and I hardly saw him anymore. It seemed that my soul could never stay filled with the comfort from others- something that every living thing needed. I was the one who always struggled to keep people close while they blindly moved on, selfishly ignoring my own needs. All I asked for in this world was to be wanted by someone- to have a shoulder to lean on- to have someone to rely on. I certainly had spent more of my life without such luxuries than with. It wasn't until I met Haruki that such a void would be filled.
I learned of the mysterious man in our town only by witnessing his appearance myself. I forget where I was going that day and why I had left the land that I had owned- it was probably to get crops from the small, open market that graced one area of our village a week. Either way, it was of much less importance when I looked upon vampyric beauty for the first time. I remember him standing on the porch of the small inn that served the purpose of renting out rooms to foreigners. Near dusk, the setting sun hardly peeking over the horizon, he emerged from the place, taking a position next to one of the beams that held the structure together, poise and control in each of his steps, audible from the wooden sandals that graced his feet. It was like nothing I had ever seen- he was like nothing my senses had ever taken in. When my eyes looked upon him, he met them steadfastly, the foreign irises failing to leave mine until I had walked far enough that my own eyes drifted elsewhere. It seemed as if he had only come out of his room to look upon me. Perhaps it was just a foolish thought . . .

I saw him again that night- when I arrived back to my own plot of land. He was clothed in the same kimono as before, gazing absently across the small rice patty that I now cultivated on my own. Moonlight gave a slight glow to the area, and it gave me enough to observe him for a few long moments from some feet away. He didn't seem phased by the fact that his sandals were sinking into the mud slightly, or that he was looking across a poor person's land- a small, shack-of-a-house clearly the owner's home. The man took me by surprise when he turned his head over his shoulder to look upon me, and I couldn't help but bow in some kind of deep respect before shuffling over to him with the things that I had bought from the market in my arms.

He was rather silent when I got in arms reach of him, though he didn't look down upon me like most in the village did. He simply stood with his eyes on me neutrally, waiting for me to catch my breath slightly and speak. When I had gained my bearings, I asked him if he was lost. Apparently he wasn't, as his simple, one-word response told me. The words that left his lips were of admiration. He spoke of the beauty of this place. It caused me to look over my field, wondering what sort of beauty he meant. Honestly though, I was more awed by the figure next to me- the one that complimented such simplicity while they, themselves were god-like. It made me feel . . . special. Only a few minutes later, when the observation of the land before us ended and our conversation quietly picked up again, I managed to work up enough courage to ask this man if he wanted to stay and talk- sit down for some food- the like. He agreed with a small, warm smile on his face. Such a smile is one I will never forget.

Once inside, I began cooking up a simple meal for the two of us and the beautiful male that was my company simply sat on one of the wooden chairs at the modest table before him, his hands folded in his lap delicately as he looked around my home. My back was turned to him as I cooked, and I felt so uncomfortable. How could such an elegant man be so peaceful in such an unembellished place? His name was Haruki, he told me. I told him my name as well. That night was spent with him sipping on the simple soup I put before him and him asking about my life. He just simply listened, and when the night grew old, he returned to the inn. With a small kiss to my cheek, he left me blushing that night, one of his clawed hands taking one of my callused ones and squeezing it as he did so, as if to comfort me and soothe the pain that had emerged in my heart after telling him my woes. Comfort. I could hardly remember it until that moment, and after that night, Haruki was all I could think about. Haruki was the only thing that crossed my mind.

We were happy in the times we communicated- in the dark hours of the day that I never questioned. Never once did I think about the sky in my lover's eyes questionably, nor did I think wrongly of the sharpness of his teeth. I never had a reason to, for Haruki had become my life. Similar to how he never looked down upon my social status, I never thought of him differently. We . . . loved eachother.
It wasn't until I found him one night, feasting upon one of my kind that I realized he was anything but human. Haruki was a vampyre, and I had fallen into a trap like so many before me. Literally, at that moment, when my lover pulled his mouth away from the throat of his prey, he looked at me with eyes fiercer than I had ever known. When he approached me with quickened steps, I could do little but collapse to the ground and sob, sealing my eyes shut as if to wake from an impossible, terrible nightmare. I felt a swift kick to my temple, and forgot the tears on my cheeks. When I tried to open my eyes, I could not. Unconsciousness had overtaken me.

I awoke to a similar darkness as the recesses of my mind- a room so pitch black that I could not see the walls- only the area just around me where candle flames flickered. Why I noticed this before the chains that were entwined around my wrists and arms, suspending me from the ceiling, I'll never know. My eyes fluttered to life as the iron cuffs scraped against my skin with movement, my feet registering that they were also cuffed together, chains connecting them to the floor to keep my body in place. I could not help but panic. My lips parted to call out to the only man that I knew could save me, though I was convinced that Haruki, that man, was the one who had done this to me. I heard my name with the voice that, sickly enough, still filled me with happiness to hear. For only a moment, I felt relief.

"Tai." His figure stepped forward through the darkness- only the dim glow of the candlelight revealing a few colors of his kimono and the faint structure of his frame and face. It was so difficult to see through the darkness. I clenched my teeth together slightly, my eyes wide as he took my chin between his fingers, his clawed thumb brushing over my lips. "Anataha, watashi ga nande arukawo shitte imasuka ? " Do you know what I am?
I wanted to scream. I wanted to question him as to why I was chained up- why this was being done to me, but all I could manage to do was nod hesitantly, my lip quivering under his touch. "Anataha , kyuuketsuki ga naniwo surukawo shitte imasuka ? " Do you know what vampires do? I did . . . I had witnessed what he had done to that villager- what he had consumed before my eyes. I could feel tears surfacing, and I gave another small nod in response to his question. His own response was a painful backhand to my cheek. A cry left my lips when he struck me.
"Iie, anatahasoushimasen." No, no you do not. I was sobbing now. "Onegai . . . shimasu," Please, I begged once. I begged twice. I whispered it over and over to myself until the claw at my lip pushed into it deeply, drawing out blood. Haruki then kicked a few candles near my feet away, allowing him to get close enough to kiss me. I whimpered from the pain and cried, shivering for the first time from the chill of his skin. Then my breath hitched on it's own, my eyes widening. A sharp pain moved through me, and heat splintered from the pain in my side. I could feel my blood dripping from the spot in my abdomen, my lover’s lips turning into a smile slightly against mine before they pulled away. Haruki stepped away from me, laughing while my own blood stayed on his lips as well as the knife he withdrew from my side. A shocked, shuddering gasp left my lips as the blade left my flesh completely and my brow furrowed in utter confusion. I wanted to vomit as he licked the knife clean, the same, sadistic smile playing on his lips.

This was the first of months of torture I endured under Haruki. Not once was I set free or allowed to leave that room. It was my personal hell, that chamber. The only light I ever saw was from the candles placed near my feet and the natural glow that came in whenever the door to the outside hallway was opened. Only Haruki ever came inside. That was surely enough for me.
My love was a sadist of the worst kind. He enjoyed making me bleed- got off on my screams and shouts- relished in my agony. He violated me countless time, raped me with his own and with objects- laughing and screaming threats and instilling fear in me all the while. He told me how weak I was, countless times. He told me that each bone he broke was bringing me one step closer to death, unless I chose otherwise. He wanted me to consider becoming what he was. I refused to succumb to his wishes.
After a week of mindless torture, my lover finally grew bored and unchained me, allowing me to navigate the emptiness of that room with food and water to heal. I awoke on my first day of 'break', so to speak, with all my wounds bandaged- wounds that covered the majority of my naked body. I did not see Haruki for days, and I was glad.. I was dying. Five days passed and I had depleted my food and water the day before. It was back in the chains for me once again, and I screamed and struggled.
For more than a year after that, I permanently became Haruki's work of art. It started as brutal torture again- a leather whip in his grasp cracking against my back until I lost consciousness every few days. As the wounds healed and were reopened, I began to feel little. I suppose my nerves were being so disfigured I felt little pain, or I was becoming desensitized to the sensation completely.
I became more of an empty shell over the months- becoming less and less in mind and body as I was conditioned and eventually, Haruki began his more serious 'work'. He used sharp, thin and precise blades to carve patterns on my shoulders, upper chest and back in areas where scars had not already begun to form. I found my tears again through this process but my lips stayed shut, emotionless like the rest of my expression that simply stared on absently into the black of the room. It was during this silent time of creation that I tried to rationalize why such a turn in my life had occurred.
My mind could not find a reason for why Haruki had lied and said that he had loved me, when he loved only my body. I couldn’t understand how such a being could do that to another.

It was on the day that the carved strokes in my skin had adequately healed that I requested my own death- for some part of me, no matter how deep down wanted to make Haruki happy.
Naturally, giving my life to him and allowing his blood to take place of my own would be the ultimate sacrifice. Perhaps then, Haruki would love me again if I did as he wished. I don’t know why I was so blind.

I did not gain freedom. When I became a vampyre, contrastingly to the previous torture I endured, I was given a collar and chain to be walked as a dog- to be used when only desired- to still never see outside the interior of Haruki’s mansion.
After many such years had passed, I did finally find my voice again. I discovered the strength that vampyrism had given me and that my master had hidden from me and broke away from my bindings and fled that place, intending never to return. I, of course, was found again by my master. It was many years though, before such happened. During that time I was able to live in the world that had been sheltered from me. I was even more distraught and emotionally deranged when captured again. Because of that, my bindings did not last for long.
I am certain that Haruki did not take into account that his blood would make quite the powerful vampyre when he had dealt with such a vulnerable human to begin with. It was the one mistake that would be his downfall. I broke from my chains often during that time, and one day, while struggling against him, something clicked inside me and the powers of my mind were set lose. With a few seconds of fixation of my eyes in his and all the untrained ability that had been trapped in me unleashed, blood spouted from my sire’s eyes and ears. My gaze had rendered my tormentor completely brain dead.

Haruki’s existence was only an obstacle- an obstruction that was taken away once his life was stolen from him. I knew exactly what I was doing when I slit his throat, dragging the serrated blade back and forth until my master was fully decapitated. I burned his limbs in the fireplace of his own home- the mansion where I had once been tortured, day after day. I did so without shame- even with a small smile on my lips and I knew that an unexplainable weight had been taken off my shoulders; a relief that could only be described as one that I had never experienced. It was deliverance. I was finally free.


It was only the consequences of his death that left me a bit anxious.
I knew whom I had killed. Haruki hadn’t just been my sire. He was a powerful vampire- an icon even, in a sense. The vampyre population knew his name- spoke of his influence through the ages. Killing him had been the same as signing a death wish. I ran, naturally. I managed to avoid being captured by the hounds of the vampyre council multiple before two male vampyres of note got a hold of me. To be exact, they were the only others who had been created by my creator. Unlike me, they loved their master, and instant hate filled their undead hearts when the one they admired fell at my hands. They had torture in store for me that would be more brutal than anything I had ever experienced.

The first thing I felt after being seized was a blindfold tied tightly around my head. Alexander and Kasamir knew of my control over the minds of others that had developed since I had killed Haruki, for we all had a similar power granted from our sire’s blood, no matter how different of people we were. They also knew that I was powerless without my eyes. I heard them mumbling, clear as day. It didn't take them long to finally address me. “Warum?” Why? Kasamir asked me the question almost like a hurt child. I felt the sharpened end of a wooden stake pressing to my lips. To my surprise, it burned, laced with some kind of magic, leaving seared flesh wherever it touched. I hissed in response through a set of clenched teeth. Kasamir, the one who had spoken, pulled away, handing the stake to Alexander. The one who held the weapon spoke. “Ich bin der Reiter und du bist das Ross. Ich hab den Schlüssel.” I am the rider and you are the horse. I have the key. He laughed shortly after- a sharp sound in the air, sadistic and angry, yet still amused. He pressed the stake to my chest now, exposed and unclothed. "Könnt ihr mich fühlen?" Can you feel me? He continued to taunt me, trying to force a response from my lips.

I said nothing to them- merely awaited whatever was in store for me. Kasamir didn’t take too well to my silence and took it upon himself to humiliate me in the process, spitting his own saliva onto my lips. “Ich hasse dich,” he hissed. I hate you. Alexander's gloved hand clenched around the weapon, pressing it to my bare chest. “Keiner hört dich schreien." No one can hear you scream. I could feel the vampire pull back the stake before he shoved it forward again and I knew Hell awaited me as I hitched a final breath of air in preperation. Puncturing the skin of my chest and breaking through bone, the wood impaled my undead heart. Agony filled me, but otherwise, I felt nothing. Only the pain was apparent- slowly creeping through my veins, searing the blood that filled them. The torment is all I can remember from that time.
In the utter emptiness that I experienced, I had no sense of time or place. All I could feel was the discomfort- the painstakingly slow death that I experienced as my blood was ravaged, drop-by-drop being eaten up by the magic that enchanted the stake in my heart. It would inevitably destroy me. The stake had forced me into torpor- a deep sleep that a vampyre usually willingly enters to pass the years of their never-ending existence. I, however, was helpless and unaware as the two of them threw my body into a coffin of iron, chaining it shut and transporting it to the north- to Lithuania. There, I was buried in a simple field- a body of land where few houses were built and even fewer people lived. I was left forgotten.
It took me more than two hundred years to grasp onto a shred of my powers and reach out to the ones around me, attempting to contact someone so I could be released. It was a risky move, for what if I found a human who simply went insane from the sound of my voice in their head, or I contacted a vampyre who still remembered my name? In such a state, I did and could not think of such things. With an opportunity to escape death, I took it gladly.

All I could do was wait. Little did I know that from the year 1719 in which I was imprisoned in my underground grave, time had gone by- places had changed and cultures had formed or revised themselves. Laws had been put into place- wars and conflicts had risen and resolved- technology had flourished . . . and I was isolated from every change that the world was going through. In 1993 I would be thrown into a world that was completely unfamiliar to me. I might as well have been a child again with how little I knew. Still though, the things of the past were still locked inside my immortal mind- the powers that flowed in whatever blood that was left in my veins still strong and even more potent with sleep and age. Though I would be uneducated once awoken, I would be more powerful than ever- and certainly angry. Once the stake would be pulled from my chest and my body given the chance to register the absence of blood in my veins, I would be at the mercy of the beast inside myself. Naturally, I attacked whoever released me against my better judgment- instincts taking precedence and making it impossible to control myself.

The beast inside me awoke before I, Tai had an idea of what was around me or what I was doing. It was the feral side that latched onto the neck of my rescuer instinctively, my arms wrapping around the other's body to keep him from escaping. It seemed that I was up and out of that coffin and ontop of the other male in no more than a second. I certainly didn't know how I had gotten there or where the hell I was to begin with.
The first thing I felt other than that pain for the first time in more than two hundred years was immense thirst . . . the most excruciating burning in my throat that one could imagine in addition to the hole in my chest where the stake had once been lodged. At the same time, I was close to drowning in pleasure from a certain taste in my mouth. It was the taste of vampyre blood that I only knew from the time in which I was turned. It was nostalgic, in a way, but I wasn't thinking about old memories. I was fighting to stay alive when I bit down on the unknown neck, pulling the blood from the vampyre beneath me ravenously. As I continued drinking, the blood allowed my body to knit itself back together and my chest was left as if nothing had touched it.

It wasn't until my beast slowly calmed that my entire body did so and I finally could think for myself and take in just what was around me. My arms loosened and I lifted my fangs and lips from the skin beneath them, taking the first unneeded breath of air I had in quite some time into my lungs. The very power of my rescuer's blood left me shaken- it was like nothing I had ever tasted- that and the fact that I had been without a taste of blood for the past two centuries. My upper half, unclothed, exposed scars across the back of my neck, shoulders, pectorals and back- some unclean slashes while other scars looked quasi-intricate and intended. My back was slashed up to the point where more scar tissue remained than normal flesh- the result of countless cracks to the surface with my sire’s whip. My eyes were veiled by my platinum hair, and I couldn't bring myself to look at the room I was sitting in or the man I had just breached a very, very thick wall of boundaries with. I hated feeling so vulnerable. It was not the way I would have chosen to meet Muurdecai, given I had a choice. Still, life is not always about choices. Such is why my body is marked with scars- an unwanted gift and reminder from the sire who then so brutally died by my hands.

With the elder's blood still on my lips, I knew that I was in for hell. I also was not about to let punishment take its toll on me. My body language was cautious as a result, but not terribly so. I said nothing- I did not know what to say. I finally lifted my head after a few long moments and instead, took in what I saw around us. Varnished tables, furniture- a hardwood floor beneath my fingertips. This was a home- that much I could tell. It didn't tell me much- only that I had breached yet another boundary of this vampyre. It was truly a wonder that I was still alive- what from my slow, planned death underground to the elder vampyre's life that I had erratically fallen into.

Finally, it was him who spoke to me first.

His voice was like a switch in my ears- the first clear noise that had resonated there for such a long time. It wasn't until I was sitting there that my muscles began to register the stiffness that had ailed them all these years, and my entire body began to ache until it became more and more severe. With no blood over the decades, they'd been deprived of oxygen and hadn't been exercised, leaving them stiff and painful. How I managed to get out of that ancient iron coffin and ontop of the elder before me is still beyond my comprehension- for the pain I felt then might had been worse than the lacerations across my skin from my creator. As if I didn't feel vulnerable enough already, my body was betraying me and bringing waves of pain once again. At first, I did little more than tighten my jaw and squint my eyes shut, but soon my fingertips were digging into the floor beneath them, my toes painfully tightening inwards in discomfort in my boots while pained groans left my teeth and slightly parted lips. I felt the room spinning and my eyes opened minimally only to find that what I felt was true.
With a slow hiss, I managed to slowly and even more painfully stretch my arms to their full potential at my sides. After the worse pain of stretching them, I felt minor relief. With a fraction of the pain gone I could finally focus.

I was grateful that I was at least able to communicate with the man that was clearly considering ending my life. It took me a moment to find my voice, for I had almost forgotten how to use it- forgotten the sound of it. It also had not been utilized for centuries.

"Gururi . . . " Spinning. It was all I whispered at first, my voice low in volume and tone. I small smile graced my lips then, only a minimal smirk as the pain of my muscles continued. I don't know why I was amused by this- perhaps the fact that I had suffered all this time, and even after being released, I was still in such agony"Taegatai," It's unbearable. I said next, at a normal volume, though this time there was no hint of pain in my voice, despite the fact that it still persisted. My condition wasn't getting any better, but I was coping.

I . . . at least felt that I owed this man something- regardless of whether I trusted him or not. That something was a name.
"Watashi . . . no namae wa Tai desu." My name is Tai. It was at this point that I knew I could not last much longer. I worked to form the last few syllables I could, managing a weak 'thank you' before my consciousness left me completely. "Dōmo arigatō." It was then that I collapsed onto my back, my life falling into the hands of the man who had pulled me from my grave once again.

It wasn't until the night after the next that my eyes, now a calm, darker burgundy, opened and gazed upon another unfamiliar ceiling. When I leaned up from the bed I had been placed on, I found that my body still ached, but not nearly as bad as before. It felt more like . . . when one becomes physically exhausted from labor. It was just simply uncomfortable. For a moment, I looked down at my clawed hands, moving my fingers slightly and pressing my hands to my chest. I was alive. How was that possible?
I remember getting stabbed with the stake. I remember feeling never-ending pain. But . . .
The other night- the coffin. Had I been stranded in such an object? What had it been- forty? Fifty years? It couldn't have been that long.
When I moved off the bed carefully and across the room, I found myself wondering just what had happened to me. In search for something to cover my scars, I opened a chest made of chestnut and pulled out the first thing I saw. I wasn't quite sure what it was, but with two short sleeves and a hole for an abdomen and head, I attempted to put it on. It was white and tight fitting but surprisingly comfortable. It's what I would soon be told was a 't-shirt', with a 'v-neck'. I found the mirror of a vanity on the other side of the room and observed my appearance for a moment. I looked almost exactly as I remembered- the white top I had chosen pulled over a familiar pair of tight-fitting brown slacks that tucked into a simple pair of black boots. Somehow, the odd ensemble worked. Paying it little mind, I turned the doorknob to the room I had been placed in and moved into the vast hallway before me.

The place was much larger than I expected- in fact, it almost reminded me of a certain mansion. Blocking the memory from my mind and allowing my eyes to trail down the hallway and to a staircase, I moved the same direction as my eyes. There were a few things I was unsure of, such as the strange things from the ceilings that seemed to radiate light, but otherwise, it was a house familiar to me in terms of similar architecture and furnishings. It wasn't until I took a step into the kitchen of the place that I turned utterly confused.

There was no fireplace . . . only shiny boxes. Well. What were you supposed to do with those? There was a smaller box that had a window that one could open that when I pressed the buttons, they didn't do anything. There were things like 'Start' and 'Defrost' and 'Popcorn' that were in English and I couldn't read. Hopelessly, I left that thing alone. There was another big object that had tunable dials and circles on the top of it, but I couldn't exactly figure out how that thing worked either. When I turned one, a light seemed to come on near the top of the box, but nothing happened. Returning the dial to where it once had been, I left the kitchen with much confusion and many unanswered questions.

After a few steps, I located the front door and pulled one of the double doors open, stepping out onto the extensive porch that was connected to the place. It was there that I stood for hours, simply contemplating until the master of the household found me again.

I remember him hiding himself from me in the field that was before me. Though he was invisible, I had known he was there- had smelled his scent on the air and the ever-so-faint rustling of the grass beneath his feet. It wasn't until he revealed himself and approached me, asking questions of my origins that I finally spoke.
"Sen shichihyaku juukyu." 1719. "Watashi hasono nen ni hokaku sareta." I was captured in that year. I paused for a moment as his laughter filled the air, turning around to face him. "Sorehadonna nen desuka?" What age is it? It would be the same as asking the year, though in my regional dialect. I felt almost . . . nervous for the answer. The other vampyre's silence after I told him the year in which I was supposedly killed left me feeling in such a way. Just as my gut had warned me, the year was much later than I had even imagined. 1993. How could so much time just slip between my fingers?
What I couldn't understand about all of this was why this vampire, as old as he was, did not know who I was and what I had done. I could hardly go anywhere after my sire's death without someone trying to kill me. Perhaps over the ages I had been forgotten, but still. Either way, it was the final point that made me decide to ask a request of Muurdecai. This coven was the safest place for me, and frankly, I had nowhere else to go. I still had trouble understanding this new world and the things in it and it was doubtful that I could survive on my own. When I asked him and he agreed, I was thankful. Still- countless hardships were ahead of me.

Learning English wasn't that hard, but the pleasure my new 'friend' took in teaching me the language and the things of the estate was anything but enjoyable. Fingers in electrical sockets, hands on hot stoves- there were plenty of times when I snapped at him and he simply laughed. I did learn one thing quickly- that Muurdecai was an a*****e. Still, I could never get too angry. I was still thankful for his hospitality and I owed him my life- literally. Plus, he was teaching me to think on my feet. I just couldn't stand how similar my age was to his, yet how elementary I felt, but it was something I had to deal with.

Months . . . years passed- and being the situation that it was, the two of us were bound to get emotionally involved at some point. As needy, sensual creatures hanging around each other a lot of the time, I took a liking greater than friendship to Muurdecai as time moved on. We never made much of it though- our acts were mostly fueled by boredom and silly lust . . . our level of attachment wasn't of love, but possession. Nothing more. I still care for Muurdecai though- more than anyone else.

I remember the day the angels fell from the sky- it is one of the clearer memories in my mind, mostly because I witnessed it, just like Muurdecai had. Something in my undead soul had drawn me outside that day to find the angel in Muurdecai's arms, and I witnessed the angel taking his blood. It was an unexpected and even terrible sight. It took almost every muscle in my body to keep me grounded to that porch- to keep myself from stalking forward and teaching the angel a valuable, deadly lesson. The coven leader was perfectly capable of taking care of himself though, so all I could do was look on. But then, after all was said and done, things got a bit more complicated.
When Muurdecai discovered that his life was bound to this being from God and I learned of such news, I was . . . I didn't know what I felt. Perhaps I felt angered by the angel's presence after that. How could I not be- an angel forcing his life on the only person I valued in this world. I found myself wanting to kill him so many times, but such would mean death to the one I admired.
It didn't take many days before I found a similar problem on my hands.
I don't believe in fate. Still, how an angel managed to find it's way to me when I was rather hungry was beyond me. He had caught me when I had avoided feeding for more days than I should, and I was eager for blood. Not to mention that the blood of an angel- it was something I had never had- it was something I wanted to sample. I was not hungry or tempted enough to be deceived though, and when the blunt teeth of that angel pressed to my neck, I threw him away and did only what I could think to do- run. Little did I know that the creature, cursed by God, would follow me. For four weeks I have been running- moving from place to place in search of peace. I have not found any, for every few days, he’s on my track again and I have to switch places, yet again. At this point, I'm considering going home in defeat, as terrible as it sounds. Considering we have at least one damned angel in the estate as it is, another one shouldn't be the worst bother in the world- at least, not in Muurdecai's eyes. As for me, I won't let that forsaken creature near me.
What you wish for, little angel, will remain a dream and nothing more.


✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxEven Those Who Are Cast From Salvation Have Pleasures...

✔ Things I A d o r e The Most... →

✛ Tranquility: I like the feeling of peace and quiet in which I can simply think with a clear head.
✛ Music: I have a pair of headphones that sit around my neck on occasion. I've taken a liking to Gustav Mahler lately, a late Romantic composer who's life passed while I was in topor. He's genius, really . . .
✛ Walks: I like getting outdoors, as it was where I spent most of my time back in Japan.
✛ Muurdecai: It's difficult to dislike the leader of the coven, considering he is the first person since my parents to treat me like a living thing- like something that matters. There's points where he aggravates me, but I am thankful for his company and care.
✛ Animals: I've always had a fascination with other living things, especially birds. On multiple occasions have I gone to Muurdecai asking if I can buy a parakeet or something similar, but he has refused every time, to my disappointment.

✖ I Can Not Help But D e s p i s e This The Most... →

✕ Loud individuals: Do not disturb peace when I find it. Do not fill the air around me with your mindless chatter.
✕ Micaiah: What can't you understand about 'Get the hell away from me'?
✕ The other angels: I honestly scorn you all for bringing such havoc upon our coven and unsettling the shred of peace we had found. I am spiteful because of this.
✕ Fledglings: All you ever do is sulk around- eating, killing and complaining. I still have yet to encounter one of you that isn't childish beyond belief.
✕ My brothers, by blood: If I ever find either of them, I will surely destroy them.
✕ Light: Not only do I find light unpleasant by my vampyric nature, but considering I was isolated from the sun for the majority of my life, I dislike it.
✕ Food: I do not eat human food.

☢ Hidden B e n e a t h The Surface →
I have a fear of being restrained. Stemming from my trust issues and the experiences I lived through, I’ve learned to shudder away from bindings and things that will physically or even mentally fetter me. If you would like to avoid a manic, screaming and anger-filled vampyre, I would suggest you keep your handcuffs to yourself.
I'm also afraid of losing control. Whether that has to do with the control it takes to keep the beast locked inside myself or holding control of situations, I like to be the dominance of a group- the sovereignty of it all. Being human and treated like nothing and being the one controlled, even after my mortality was taken from me gave me such a personality. I hate to be ruled over. I detest being looked upon as inferior.


↘ Behind Every T r a g e d y There Is A Cause...→

▸ insidelookingout◂

[M i s t e r Histrionic]

「Vitali Azier Sribolong」

"Live for forever, die for tomorrow."

✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxCenturies will never change this...

» Forever My N a m e Shall Be... →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Vitali Azier Sribolong

» IAnd Yet It Seems Time Produces N i c k n a m e ( s ) For Everything... →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Vi::

Oh yes, it is awfully hard to say Vitali. so many have shortened it to Vi. Well, the ones I don't sleep with and the ones I have not slept with call me that. I have accepted such a name with little problems. Besides, it is but a label to identify me.


Vivi::

Quite the woman's name. The people I have slept with and have lived like this name for some reason. Grudgingly, I accepted it. Rare is it that I will answer to the name from anyone but those that share a bed. It's really quite amusing sometimes.

» My love, I Can Assure You That A g e Is Nothing But A Number→
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Five hundred and twenty-four years of age.

» Thankfully A Persons H e i g h t Shall Always Change, But So Does W e i g h t Below →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxApproximately 6'2 and about 140 lbs.

» On This Miraculous Day Of Hell I Was B o r n Below →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Cold snowy night of December 17th.

» Even If Centuries Have Past & Time Has Taken Its Toll My G e n d e r Is Set In Stone →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxMale

» Don't You Know S e x u a l i t y Is Such A Touchy Topic →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Hmmm... I have always followed my interests. Does it matter what gender the other is? Open-minded.

» The Years Have Changed My A p p e a r a n c e... Do You Recognize Me? →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxHave you ever seen me paint? I draw quite well. Perhaps I'll even show you a picture or two. It is a hobby I developed when I was sad... Of course, that was not the only reason. I have such great memory, and an endless need to draw. With this in mind, my habit became my career. I never gave up my nightly habits, turning my adventures into art. That did not end when I was turned and it still has not. Though the modern world will never see my newest works, i may visit older pieces in museums. How i so enjoy laughing at the petty works of my youth.


✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxHmph, What A Pain In The a**...

☸ I Never Asked For This G i f t →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxPainting::
Does it not sound so utterly normal? Well, It would be if it wasn't for the fact that I can materialize almost anything I paint. The trick is, i have to mix my own blood with the paint. Even then, there are some things I cannot do. But rest assured, weapons are not out of my reach. Even nature -- some of it -- will yield to me.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxIllusions::
Ah, such cruel fate. This may seem like such a useless thing, but I find many uses in such an ability. I mean, being able to show people their greatest desires or their greatest fear is an ability I was born to have. Besides, I'm pretty sure that most people cannot tell the difference between reality and fantasy when faced with certain things.

☸ Now I Know I Am Truly C u r s e d →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx



✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxThere Is No Such Thing As Fairytales...

✄ After Living For So Long, You're Bound To Have Your Own O u t l o o k On Life... →
Oh my, my ,my… putting my personality into words will be a task worth conquering indeed. Hmm…., I suppose I should start out with the most obvious of things. I'm a very flirtatious person. Oh yes, I love to hit on men and women alike as long as they suit my fancy. That can be a challenge though. I hate the whiney types of people in the world. So irritating… But at the same time, they can be quite adorable. Wait, I'm getting off topic here. I guess that's another thing. I don't stay on topic for long. Not unless it's about something serious. In case you're wondering, I do know what the word serious means. Sure, I act all lazy and mess around a lot, not really taking anything seriously, but I do know what the word means. I can get serious too, when the occasion calls for it. I make sure I'm not around to be so straight laced though. It just isn't good for the soul! Not that I really have one. If I did, I just wouldn't be the person I am today.

I like to tease people. Poking fun at the ones that just don't like to be messed with is hilarious. So in a way, I can be very annoying. But even I know when it's time to stop. I do value my own life. Most of my kind hates what they have become. I really have no idea why. I love it. I can kill. I know that must sound sick and wrong to people who only see me as all smiles and games; I just have to admit that the thrill it gives me is amazing. Heh heh, not many would believe it and many others know it. I do not restrain myself when taking blood unless I really do need to. I don't always kill my victims you see. I like to watch their reactions the next night and what kind of nightmares they get from the experience. More than one has already found their way to a padded room with beautiful little pills.

Besides the happy nonchalant me that everybody sees, I have other aspects that are not so easily noticed. One such aspect is my colorful cruelty. No, I'm not a sadist that likes to cause physical pain or anything. I play with emotions. Since I mostly don't have any feelings for humans and the like, I have no trouble messing around with them and leaving them emotionally crushed afterwards. It does not happen all of the time but most of it. Hmmm, I care for… some people. Yes, this physically hurts to admit! The only ones I actually have any real relations with are those of my coven and they are the only ones I will willingly risk my existence for. Now with that said, let us move along to other matters. Oh, I do not have much of a temper. My nature doesn't really allow it. I spend most of my time being polite and charming. But there are buttons that should never be pressed. I can get pissed and I guarantee that I will hold a grudge for at least a year. In that time, I will exact revenge worth far more than what caused my anger to begin with. Fair warning buds, just don't press the wrong buttons and you'll be fine. And since most people don't seem to realize this, being irritated and being pissed off are completely different. Yes, I am quite a blunt person.

Right, now for the last bits before I forget. I'm not easily surprised. I am pretty dense when it comes to romance, but not when it's so obvious. oh and this may be the most important aspect of my personality. I don't do anything that isn't beneficial to me. It's just as simple as that. If you can't handle it, you're better off not dealing with me. Oh, and I'm extremely independent. I most likely will never forgive anyone that takes my freedom from me. Actually, I never will.

✄ Close Your Eyes, Shield The Children; The F r e a k s h o w Is About To Begin... →
A curious fellow are you? What makes you think I would like to share my story with you anyway? What if I have forgotten? What if I have no story to tell? What if I just kill you now? Ha, ha, no worries. If you wish to know my story then take a seat. I don't like to repeat myself, so please pay attention.

My mother wanted a daughter. My father wanted a son. My grandparents wanted as many grandchildren my parents could produce before they died. Guess whose dreams came true when my mother gave birth on December the seventeenth? That was the day my father held me with love and deemed me Vitali [for those of you that may wish to know, Vitali means life. Ironic word considering I am no longer of the living.]. It was what he called, the most suitable for a first born son and child. Sure, my mother was thrilled that she had a healthy baby boy but she still wished she had a girl. I know this because I had asked my grandfather after a few years of being dressed like a doll. But that is off track. I still have to tell you what my grandparents thought. They were… ecstatic? Yes, that is the word. What a shame that they died only a few years later. My mother happened to be pregnant with another child at the time too. But this is getting a little ahead of myself.

My father was a wealthy noble in the late middle ages. We were heading into a world so different from knights and their lords. How odd. Of course, that had little to no effects on my childhood. Those were all my father's affairs. Even if they were meant to be mine one day, I didn't learn about that until much later in my life. Anyway, I was actually not expected to live through the winter since most babes born during such a time died before they were a week old. My parents did all they could to save my life. They almost failed. From what my mother had told me so long ago, I turned blue one night and never cried. They feared I was sick and took me to a church. Can you believe it, a church! How I hate those things. What had they been expecting? Did they think an angel would descend to the earth to save a lowly child?! Ah, well, that's what they did think and they still did even after my disappearance. Once again, I'll get back to that. They thanked God for my survival of course.

Growing to be healthy was difficult. I was fed the best of foods and trained how to fight with as many weapons as could be taught. My studies of how to run the estate was also incorporated into my very busy schedule. Out of all that trouble, my mother still found the time to play dress up with me. No, I did not enjoy it but I do think that her games were part of the reason I turned out the way I am today. Her expectant attitude and the love she showed was enough to teach me how to be sensitive to a woman's feelings. Don't forget the dead chivalry of knights though. My father had made sure that manners were the one thing I was good at if nothing else. I never disappointed I suppose… Not until I got much older at least. Heh, heh… you know what I'm talking about don't you? Well, I never really saw much of my father back then. On occasion he would be home and free to play with his only son. I spent most of my days with my loving grandparents. How they adored me.

Then my mother conceived another child. Well, like all children my age, I obviously became jealous of this little fact. I knew what it meant when my mother told everyone that she would have another child. I would be left behind. I would be the one to be left in the dark as they doted over this new child in the house. I felt I was no longer going to be important. So I changed. I changed from a happy little boy that was overworked as it was to a spoiled little boy that threw tantrums. It was only natural. My mother and father had no idea what to do about it and my grandparents passed on. I was soon left in the care of 'nannies'. That just made me feel ever worse. My parents obviously had no idea what was wrong with me. They distanced themselves even more but still expected the same of me. How frustrating they were! And when the child was born, I found out it was a daughter. So now I had a sister born in summer. I do not remember the date for I hated that spoiled little brat. Hate is a strong word they say, good. Though I did not feel the word was strong enough.

As I had expected, they doted over their new child. Dahlia was her name. My father was home far more often all of a sudden. Was I nothing but a tool? I never really found out. But it seemed that way. I was replaced by my little sister. I decided it was better if I just gave up on the whole 'spoiled brat' attitude I had going on. It wasn't working anyway. I chose to play the part of the indifferent older brother. That role… I was born to play it seemed. I ignored my sister as much as I could and along with her, my parents. They had finally figured out what was wrong with me to begin with and, what do you know, they tried to make amends. Didn't work out very well for anyone actually. The years went by and I learned all I needed to from those people. That's right, by the time I was fifteen, I didn't even consider them family anymore. It was their fault. I was the only child they needed. I jest. I had long since gotten over the jealousy thing. In fact, I was very well liked by society and wanted by all, even the men. I guess you could say the mighty sin known as lust had taken me. And how I loved its embrace.

My parents on the other hand… well, they were not so keen on such a thing. I was already fifteen and I had turned down every woman they had chosen for me as a fiancé. Of course, most of those women I had already slept with, but hey, they didn't need to know that. This went on for years and years. Oh the joys of being in bed with either man or woman. At first, I was a little shocked that I had considered men interesting but hey, it was enjoyable enough. Of course, we kept that completely under wraps. God was about the only outsider that would ever know assuming he even existed. My sister, the horrible spoiled brat tried to rat on me several times. I had my ways of shutting her up, especially since all I had to do was ask my father if I could choose her husband for her. Of course, that would have meant I would have had to trade my own freedom but adultery was not beyond my grasps; I would have willingly committed it rather than be stuck with a single person for the rest of my life. I could barely stay with one person for more than a day! Yes, that must sound terribly whorish to you but it is the truth.

On the year of my twenty-first birthday, one of my 'friends' hosted a ball for me. They knew I loved such events for it would be forever easy to locate a new partner to sleep with. That was all I cared for really; Physical satisfaction that no other could receive. Why was it all I cared for? Well, there wasn't anything better for me to do and I just wanted to piss off my parents. It was a hobby of sorts, with great benefits. But odd things did happen on occasion; Such as what happened that night. I suppose someone wanted to teach me a lesson. I do not remember if she was a lover of mine or just a woman I happened to have slept with one night. I care little for names. They are merely devices used to tell one human being apart from another yes? Can anyone really say I am wrong? I didn't think so. Now, I remember her vaguely. I know I thought she was beautiful but the only thing about her I see clearly in my mind's eye is her fascinating black hair. She had to be foreign. Where I lived it was uncommon for someone to have black hair.

She came to me that night while I was on the dance floor looking for someone to dance with. I could not do anything with men in public but I knew of a few that wished to get me in private. How entertaining was that thought; I could barely contain myself. When she came to me, I assumed she wanted something from me but no matter how much I flirted, it seemed to be completely ineffective. How bothersome. I remember felling a bit flabbergasted at the results. Of course, she would not let me be either. Smiling, she had led me to a room, claiming that she wanted me to meet someone. I knew not who at the beginning but I was intrigued. It was supposed to be a man after all. It was rare that a woman would want top introduce me to a man and not another woman that was too shy to come ask for me herself.

We were in for a shocking surprise. She apparently had no idea since she screamed the second she opened the door to the room. The man she had wanted me to meet was none other than Gaspard, my father's closest of friends. I always knew the man was odd, coming only in the night and leaving long before dawn. But I never expected him to be a murderer. At least that was what I saw when I first looked at him from the doorway. I guess you could call it shock. I was actually more in a daze over the deafening scream that came from the woman. She had fainted by the way. And no, I did not catch her. I was a little busy registering the blood and the dead woman on the bed. Gaspard was… not very worried about this at all. I suppose he had planned on killing me or something. Well, either way that thought never crossed my mind. I took in everything and closed the door behind me. Who would have thought that mythical creatures like vampires actually existed? I certainly was not able to fathom the thought until Gaspard had proved they existed. He was a vampyre. It was… interesting. I scooted the girl out of the way and turned to my father's close friend. Out of pure curiosity of his reaction to a certain request, I asked him something that completely threw him off.

I asked him to turn me.

I had no reason to think he would kill me. He was my father's friend and I really wasn't the type to tell everyone's secrets, even ones of this scale. So what if he was a vampyre? More power to him. Anyway, he laughed at me and asked why. "For the immortality of course." That was my answer. I was smiling I think because he looked at me as if I was crazy. Then he smiled too. It happened so fast I didn't know how to react. He had gotten so fast all of a sudden and he was holding onto me with so much strength I thought I would be crushed under the pressure. It was the first time I had ever felt fear. I feared death. How was that possible? There was a pain coming from my neck as I felt my life's blood drain away from me. I couldn't even cry out! It was a pathetic little show and I blacked out. But I awoke eventually with the taste of blood in my mouth. He had made me a vampyre as I had requested. Talk about being careful for what you wish for! But despite that, I never really felt regret.

Maybe I didn't feel regret in the beginning due to the overwhelming thirst I felt instead. I never thought I could be parched, I mean I had had three glasses of wine before even entering that damn room. But the fact remained that I was thirsty. The first thing Gaspard offered me was the woman that had accompanied me. He told me to drink if I wanted to live much long. Strange how he called it living when my heart had already stopped. I was no longer alive, just a walking corpse that would never age and would never die. Well, unless I suddenly got staked or something. It wasn't until after I made my first kill that I began to wonder about what my new life would be like. A room full of people and a fledgling like me? Oh dear… what a horrible mix! Needless to say, I couldn't exactly live there anymore. Gaspard had to help me out a lot in the beginning. I truly am grateful to the man.

Now, before you start thinking that we were the typical fledgling and master duo, I want to clear this up. We were more business partners than anything else. I raided the treasury and we disappeared that night. I was eager to learn how to control myself; otherwise I knew I would be miserable. That was one thing I refused to let happen to myself. I refused to be unhappy. That was also one of the reasons I felt no regret for being what I am now. I learned quickly out of necessity. It wasn't that I hated the old man, but I really didn't want to spend more time than I wanted to with him. He was there to teach and I was there to learn. We worked together on many things and that was the end of our relationship. We had no reason to get attached, no reason to care for one another and no reason to stay with one another for too much longer. For centuries I learned and had met many of my own kind by then. It turned out that Gaspard was a coven leader. He had many under his care as either friends or fledglings to the others. This was the first and last time he had ever turned anyone. I was grateful.

I think it took about two centuries before I decided that it was time for me to leave. I had no more reason to remain. They had taught me all I could learn from them and more. It was time for me to discover my own things. Which reminds me, I never mentioned that I was a painter did I? No… I guess not. Well, as an occupation to keep a steady flow of money, I travelled around painting. My paintings were dull at first but as time went on; I had nothing better to do and just kept practicing. To say I did not have a talent for art would be a lie. I just never indulged in it before. I became very skilled in this area and my work became rather prized. But the downfall of it all was the fact that the painter wasn't supposed to be able to live forever. How irritating. I still continued however. Uh… I just went off topic again, didn't I? I really need to fix that problem. Oh, wait; there was a point to telling you this after all. You see, I'm… a gifted vampyre. I was 'born' with a special gift --two to be exact-- that most normal vampyres do not have. So in a way, I'm special. Isn't that great? Well, it was to me and still is. The humans aren't so lucky though.

I discovered my first gift by accident. Well, that's probably how we all discover them. From my love of painting, I discovered that if I mixed my blood with the paint, I could make the pictures literally materialize in the real world. The only problem is… it has to be inanimate. So you can imagine the countless things I had created, can't you? Weapons, money, even a house. At least I never had to buy a house. All I had to do was make one. It was easy. Well, somewhat. It took up a great deal of stamina to use so after nearly dying from going overboard, I decided it was best not to use that skill often. The second gift I discovered through a purely random encounter with a woman. I wanted to seduce her with the things she liked but she didn't really care for materialistic objects. Go figure. That's when I discovered that I also had the ability to create illusions. Very useful.

Okay… this story seems to have dragged on for quite some time now. Let's skip a few decades and see what we find. I lived on my own for a very long time and had absolutely no desire to join any coven. Well, I ended up joining one eventually. I honestly don't know how it came to be. Okay, I do but it was a confusing time for me. I discarded most of the reasons and surrounding circumstances from my memory bank. Hmmm…. I met the leader of the coven and the other one… his companion. They were both older than I was but I am pretty damn old. I met them some time in the 1800s. Yea… I think closer to the 1900s. So we haven't really known each other for much more than a century. In that small margin of time [since time matters little to the immortals] we 'got to know' one another. The leader, Muudercai, he's a stiff. But that's okay. The second one… um… can't really recall. Well, whatever. The point is, I met them, and stuck with them. If either one of them had asked me to leave them be I would have left in a heartbeat. That's just how much I cared. Now… I think I still would, with hesitance…

And of course, others had joined up with us as well. The younger vampyres of the group, one still a fledgling even. Now we are a strange and odd group of six. I wonder how it is we don't rip each other to pieces everyday. Ha, ha… I must say that it's amusing to watch though. I know my place very well and have no intention of taking things too far. But lately that has become an impossible task. Want to know why? Well, let's take a look shall we?

I was walking down the street one day [night actually] and I suddenly see this heavenly light. You have to understand, I was no catholic or Christian; I did not believe in god. So this was a very confusing and shocking experience for me. I do not get surprised easily after all and this certainly surprised me. So it was a big deal. Anyway, an angel descends into view. Now what would a messenger from god want from a damned creature like me? Well, I really couldn't care. I was anxious to learn what the blood of an angel would taste like. However, I was sorely disappointed in the results. It wasn't that it tasted bad; it was the small fact that I never got the chance to taste it. The angel bit me first. Yes, I said bit. Since when did creatures of good take blood from the bad? Were we not some sort or infectious disease in their eyes? Apparently not. This one bound me to him for all eternity, or at least until death do we part. Maybe even then we might end up together. Geez…

Alright, I was a little confused in the beginning but I soon learned the reason why. He bound me to him because he had fallen for me. Poor bird. I had not the capacity to love and still do not. His love shall remain unrequited for I have no intentions of loving an angel, especially one that had bound me without my consent. No, I would not have given consent if he had asked. He would have been dead. I wish he was but I tolerate it for now. The birdie actually has some interesting qualities but definitely not enough for me to forgive him for what he ahs done. He is slowly moving from the irritation stage to the pissed off stage. Not good for him. Not good at all.

And I think that concludes our little story.



✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxEven Those Who Are Cast From Salvation Have Pleasures...

✔ Things I A d o r e The Most... →
▶Sweets:: Yes, I just adore the sugary flavors. I eat it all of the time. Thank goodness I'm not human. If i were, I'd have nothing but false teeth.
▶Blood:: I'm a vampyre, what do you expect? Of course I would love blood. the taste is magnificent. Though i used to gag whenever I drank it. Now i just love it!
▶Killing:: What gives you a better feeling? I'm already sin, i might as well add this to the wrack too right?
▶Tea:: Ah, a taste that i have had since my younger days. I just can't go on a day without proper tea.
▶Smoking:: This is a new habit i acquired from my time in the USA. What? It's not like I can get lung cancer or anything.
▶Painting:: Well duh! It's my favorite thing to do.
▶Suffering:: i so enjoy it when others are emotionally hurting. Well, as long as they aren't close to me.

✖ I Can Not Help But D e s p i s e This The Most... →
▶Idiots:: They too annoy the crap out of me...
▶Alcohol:: I don't like the after taste.
▶God:: Heh... he isn't even supposed to exist for crying out loud!
▶Ginger:: Yea... this is so gross.
▶Angels:: Isn't it obvious why?
▶Whiny people:: They annoy the crap out of me. For the love of all things evil, they should disappear!
▶Joy:: I hate it when i see certain people happy...

☢ Hidden B e n e a t h The Surface →
I fear falling in love. Why? well, because love makes you weak and i do not want to be weak. Not to mention that love always leads to heartache and misery. Like I said before, i refuse to be miserable. I also fear losing control. I like my security as a person who can keep himself in check. So i do not ever want to lose myself in anger, sorrow love or whatever else there is. I just don't want to deal with all that drama...


↘ Behind Every T r a g e d y There Is A Cause...→

▸ xX Toxiic_B U N N Y Xx ◂

[M i s t e r Histrionic]

「Felix Remus Crowe」

"There is only one difference between a madman and me. The madman thinks he is sane. I know I am mad."

✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxCenturies will never change this...

» Forever My N a m e Shall Be... →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Felix Remus Crowe

» And Yet It Seems Time Produces N i c k n a m e ( s ) For Everything... →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Fel -
For people who like abbreviated forms of already shortened names. I have only been called this a few times in my life span.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxThe King of Fools -
Self explanatory really because truly I am.



» My love, I Can Assure You That A g e Is Nothing But A Number→
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Four hundred and twenty years.

» Thankfully A Persons H e i g h t Shall Always Change, But So Does W e i g h t Below →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx6ft 3, weighting at 160lbs

» On This Miraculous Day Of Hell I Was B o r n Below →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx March 06

» Even If Centuries Have Past & Time Has Taken Its Toll My G e n d e r Is Set In Stone →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxMale

» Don't You Know S e x u a l i t y Is Such A Touchy Topic →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Bisexual, taste of both worlds as they say! and I'm a greedy little b*****d.

» The Years Have Changed My A p p e a r a n c e... Do You Recognize Me? →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
'You are old Father William,' the young man said,
'And your hair has become very white;
And yet you incessantly stand on your head —
Do you think at your age it is right?'

In my youth,' Father William replied to his son,
'I feared it might injure the brain;
But, now that I'm perfectly sure I have none,
Why, I do it again and again.'



✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxHmph, What A Pain In The a**...

☸ I Never Asked For This G i f t →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxLaughter -

This is a gift I was truly graced with. I believe that I could make anyone on this earth laugh, I do not wish to sound full of myself but I simply state the facts. Laughter can be an exceptional tool at times for it can form bonds of friendship quite easily and is especially useful when I am on the prowl for prey.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxMimicry -

True to my profession I can mimic any person I wish and usually when I do I am sure to make a song and dance about it. To achieve this however I must taste the others blood, only a drop will do but when it happens I will be allowed to clone any technique you had spent so many pain staking years to learn. Wait…it gets worse, I can also take on your form, that’s right I can shift into an exact clone to further confuse your already befuddled mind, s**t sucks huh?

☸ Now I Know I Am Truly C u r s e d →
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx



✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxThere Is No Such Thing As Fairytales...

✄ After Living For So Long, You're Bound To Have Your Own O u t l o o k On Life... →
What to say about myself? Well I am a trickster, a prankster and another name ending with ster. I am your Joker, Clown and Fool, for this I am proud! For a man that can make others laugh is a happy man indeed. Seriousness goes against my very nature, carefree am I! I laugh and giggle at the stupidity of the world, I pick and prod at it, make a mockery of its faults. I am inappropriate to the point of irritation and am often not able to keep a straight face under most circumstances. If you become solemn with me then I will simply laugh at you! Haha! And what an occasion it will be! For I know that deep down you cannot resist my infectious chortles.

If I am alone if ever such an occasion were to commence I admit that sometimes I will become slightly depressed. With no audience and only my thoughts to entertain me, I become rather restless as I am forced to dwell upon a past that I wish not to remember.

I can however play cruel pranks on anyone that decides to get on my bad side, my nasty streak is not often shown but beware when it is. I would say that I am a man that is not easily annoyed and rarely do I become angry and raise my voice for it gets me no where and I would much rather be grinning then growling. I do have bite but I would much rather be nice! It is so much easier to get around in this world when you have good manners, tip your hat, place your coat over puddles and I thought I was mad! Jesus this world is ******** up! And I love every moment of it! He He He!

✄ Close Your Eyes, Shield The Children; The F r e a k s h o w Is About To Begin... →
You wish to know of me? Hee hah hee haw! Oh joy of joys! Well my curious kittens, my tale is one of silliness and laughter, I never was a man for seriousness but then I was stark raving mad! Haha! Oh I kill myself! Anyway enough of these frivolities, I shall speak frankly with you now. I was borne in the 19th century to Lilith and Antoine Crowe, ah such charming people they were! I would have popped over for tea if they were not six feet under! Oh my. They raised me well, my mother especially and what a woman she was, such a tiny itsy bitsy little waist but at the time I suppose that was the norm. I tried one of those corsets she wore, wasn’t really my thing, in fact I popped it right open! She was rather displeased. My mother was the strict one of our household, telling me to sit up straight and how to wipe my face correctly when eating, it’s a surprise she hadn’t sat in the lavatory with me and taught me the ‘polite’ way to wipe my a**, if there was such a way, I mean lets face it, s**t is s**t. I always found it curious however that someone as prim and proper as my mother ended up with the ragamuffin that was my father. I think that’s where I got my lunacy from, now that I mull it over, you see my father was an eccentric but despite this he was an absolute genius. I remembered sitting at the dinner table one evening with my mother taking small sips of her soup using such dainty grace whilst my father slapped it into his gob. Then suddenly he stood up, spilling the liquid over his waistcoat and rushing to put pen to paper, he scribbled manically, hair springing from his head as he wrote and by the time he had finished the soup was cold and both my mother and I had long since finished. I found such things amusing whilst my mother simply scowled.

As I grew I became more and more like him although my madness seemed to take a completely different direction. My fathers insanity was directed towards bettering the world, he focused all of that derangement into plans and sketches of contraptions he knew would change the lives of many. Whilst I…well my lunacy was directed at nothing for a while I would simply babble, rant and rave about queer things and ask questions which could have no possible answer. My mother was ashamed of me for doing so, it was rare for her to let me outside alone unless she were there to accompany me, nudging me sharply in the side if it appeared my mouth were about to open.

It was only on that faithful day when my mother was particularly desperate that I was allowed to roam the streets alone, I was rushed off to collect sorely needed groceries and that was that. I brought what was asked of me and despite my mothers strict instruction to not open my mouth and pretend I was mute, the words ended up tumbling from my lips. I gleefully asked the man at the stall why carrots were orange, why not blue? Or pink? Or green?! All I received was a perplexed look as he itched his head in bewilderment. I hadn’t noticed a man, he appeared to be some sort of lord gazing at me with slight curiosity when I finally noticed him looking at me in such a way, I simply stared back with bulging eyes.

“You, Boy! What is your name?” the man finally asked and I let out a strange little giggle

“Why it is Felix my lord! What of it!?” I cried and bent down low to give the other a mocking bow.

“Yes, Well…Felix, are you currently in employment?” he further questioned

“Why no M’Lord, do you think I should be?” I answered his question with yet another, keeping my cheeky grin.

The man appeared baffled before finally he said in a way that sounded more like an order “Come with me then, I think the King would find use for you.”

And that was how it all started. I became the king’s personal Jester! I think you will have heard of him, Charles I ring any ding a lings? I thought he was a very amiable man. I had fun making him laugh that was for sure! I’d ramble and rave to high heaven and would cause the man to burst into tears after each sentence. Ah those were the days, the grand old days when I realized that my purpose in life was to make people laugh. There two types of fool you see, the natural and the licensed, I was told by many that I was simply divine, a natural borne fool through and through, that God’s hand had graced me with such a power. Naturally this made many jealous especially the previous ‘licensed’ jesters that were also in my King’s employment as the spot light shone upon me, it dulled on them and they were shunned to the darkest corner.

Callooh! Callay! I would cry as I pranced around the room, somersaulting and rabbiting on about how a fox was really a shrew and that a book should be put in a nook. I kept my audience captivated and amused, clapping frantically at each mad word I spoke. Never before had I been so happy, my mother had taught me to feel shame for such things but these people appreciated my folly in fact they welcomed it with wide arms. I was especially crucial when the war began, Charles needed a few chuckles to sidetrack himself from such morbid thoughts and I was more than happy to use my silliness to perk him right up. In fact he was in such high sprits afterwards that he decided on a whim that he would hold a grand party and invite only the most established and well to do guests. He requested that I was to perform in front of them and to do a damn good job not that he doubted my abilities of course. I could really knock em’ dead when I tried.

It was on that rather breathtaking evening of gay extravagance that I met him. My maker, the big cheese, numero uno…okay enough with the corny nicknames obviously establishing a point is not my forte. I remember seeing him, he stuck out like a man wearing an elephant suit although obviously not because of such a ridiculous reason. This man, he had an ethereal beauty about him, so pale and fragile in appearance that I was fooled into thinking he was sick or simply weak, my assumption couldn’t have been further from the truth. I hadn’t meant to gaze at him so frequently as I cracked punch line after punch line then bounded and leaped around the room making off little comments here and there. I allowed myself to be viewed as a raving buffoon because lets face it watching a guy acting like a moron is pretty ******** hilarious, why the hell do you think clowns were so popular? Well to most anyway. There I go, going off track again! But if all of us followed the tracks we were told well nothing would be done! And we’d all be boring, dull individuals festering in the urine of life.

So yes! There I was, having left the floor so that performers lesser in talent then myself could attempt to woo the crowd and fail miserably might I add. I was immediately complimented by the lords and ladies then a goblet of wine was summoned for me, I drunk it hastily, my throat parched from its overuse. They all seemed to part however when the man I had been so infatuated with made his appearance, he bowed to me and told me of his admiration. It was rather embarrassing to think of when I caught myself blushing slightly and letting out shrill, nervous laughter as he placed a hand on my lower back and guided me away from the crowd of vultures. I felt quite honoured that such a man would wish to talk to me in private, my curiosity was far too great for me to realize that considering the circumstances I really should not have allowed myself to be alone with a stranger. I was never a man of logic though, I ran on impulse and right now my impulse was telling me to hold tight to this man lest he disappear completely.

He’d led me to a small parlour that was surprisingly empty, in a way I was glad as I wished to know what this man had to say without the distraction of others. As I sat down we started our conversation, he told me his name was Edwin and that he had travelled the world trying to find trinkets of curiosity. Edwin told me I was a peculiar trinket that he would do anything to have as part of his collection when he said this I remember him leaning in and I inhaled that rich earthy smell that seemed to engulf my lungs. I quickly laughed and told him ‘I am no trinket to acquire, sir. If I were such a bauble of a man then I hardly think I would be worth the plight’ my words only seemed to amuse him further before his eyes took on a look of seriousness.

“Little Joker, you arouse my interest more than any of the cads I have been forced to bare witness to. It is in your best interests to join me for soon you will not be needed here. To see your spark fade would be such a sombre affair.” he had softly spoken the words into my ears and left me, the puzzler of puzzles in a state of confusion.

“I will not be needed? Surely you jest dear sir! Life cannot be lived without laughter and thus I shall never be out of a job!” I cried with a chortle.

Suddenly my chin was gripped tightly, his eyes which now that I saw closer up were a colour that could not be classified as human. They were tinted with red as if someone had gone nutso with a red marker pen and drawn around his irises.

“Listen closely to me fool, your King will soon be overthrown and when he is the man that will take his throne will see your profession as nothing but a frippery. You will be penniless and bitter by the end of your short life. I cannot stand the thought of such talent being wasted.” he almost growled the words causing me to stiffen in slight fear.

I laughed again, this only seemed to aggravate the man more and somehow I managed to draw my chin away from his death grip as I rose from my sitting position. “What an excellent joke sir! I shall have to add it to my performance!” I replied and with haste began to make my exit, the man was no longer interesting to me, in fact he was downright frightening. Edwin didn’t take kindly to my attempted escape, he had grabbed me quite violently with a speed that had not even registered in my mind, I could have sworn that I never even heard the man get up! And yet there he was. I felt a hot breath against my pulsing neck and despite the situation I found myself shivering in slight pleasure as my skin tingled under such an action.

“I had wanted you to come by your own will but it seems you have stuck to your role as the fool to the very end.” he said with a snarl.

Then I screamed but no one heard me over the festivities and the twanging of lute’s. My neck throbbed in pain, my body convulsing as he dug what appeared to be fangs into my soft, human flesh. Soon my screams were ended, no longer having the energy to go through with such a movement as he continued doing the perverse act upon my body. I had long since blacked out by the time he had finished although I do recall something wet pressing against my lips and would learn when I awoke, to my horror that he had fed me his own blood.

Waking up for the first time in my new life was anything but a joke. I felt numb all over, my arms and legs at an odd angle and eventually when my vision stopped blurring I registered the enclosed space I had been placed in. As soon as I sat up I hissed, falling back down and spasming slightly as pain and a deep, primal thirst took over my very being. At once I pushed upwards, raising my fist I literally punched away the lid of what I now knew was a coffin, it went flying to the other end of the room as I stood, lurching slightly.

“Bravo!” a voice called from the darkness, I knew that voice and yet my mind was nothing but that of a savage. I growled and ran in its direction, feral with need as I tried to obtain whatever the hell I was looking for, anything to quench this burning desire. That was when a body was thrown in my direction, it was the form of a woman that had obviously been a prostitute, two precise puncture wounds had been made on her neck. I gazed at them hungrily, knowing instinctively what act I must commit in order to keep myself alive. If I had been in the right frame of mind I would have turned away in disgust at the mere thought but thanks to this transformation, I was forced to see it from a whole different perspective and boy did I. That first taste of the luscious liquid was enough to send me spiralling upwards, I was on a high that not even the best of drugs could inflict, I was riding on that sweet rush that filled my veins, giving me life once again.

I remember feeling violent rage when I was drawn away from my task but after a moment I simply collapsed onto the floor, dazed and grinning like an idiot. My mass of black hair was gently being stroked as I began to recover and when my eyes focused I saw the face of Edwin staring down at me with a soft expression. Quickly I drew away, standing up briskly only to wobble and stumble like a toddler that had only just learnt how to walk. I lifted my hands to my face, ripping them away when I felt something odd, my fingertips were coated with dried blood, I turned slightly and saw a mirror with a very odd creature reflected in it. Surely that being could not be me? He looked like a wild animal, blood encircling his lips and a pair of animalistic eyes that were large and stained with a tint of crimson. In the back of my mind I registered it was me, in my terror and confusion I began to crumble and eventually sob at the realization that I had been turned into some sort of monster and who the hell would laugh at a monster? Nobody that’s who.

Edwin stroked my shoulder, attempting to reassure me, I glared at him hatefully. I cursed at him, lunging at his form and attempting to rip his insides out, only to be held back with apparent ease. The dark stranger grabbed my wrists, pinning them behind my back and then standing behind me, his chin nuzzling into the crook of my shoulder. “You are vampire now Felix and you are mine. Did I not tell you I would own you?” the man almost cooed and it was enough to make me sick as I struggled against his grip. “I will teach you everything you need to know, it may seem cruel now but soon you will see the many advantages of joining my kind.” he whispered as he began to lick the dried blood off my face. All the while our spectator, the now dead prostitute lay limply upon the carpet, her once beautiful crystal blue eyes staring at nothing.

Although it pains me to admit it, my new life did get better once I had resigned to the fact that there was no turning back. I could continue to fight my maker and learn nothing, remaining a worthless new borne for the rest of my immortal life or I could let him teach me the ways of the vampire so that I would be able to mould myself into something useful. My maker was rather impressed with how quickly I managed to get over things, you can’t knock a clown when he’s down right? I knew I had to laugh at some point or else I really would become broken.

Of course Edwin had been right, my once precious King had been overthrown and all of those that had been in my previous profession were tossed to the curb. I couldn’t help but wonder however if King Charles I had taken my absence badly and if possibly it had led to his demise, never underestimate the power of laughter children, it really does save lives. Another aspect of my past life I never was able to witness was the fate of my parents, how had they taken my disappearance? Was my father still working on his mad inventions? And did my mother still sit there and scold him whilst secretly smiling at his manic ways? I’d never know. I was quite glum about the entire affair and even now I feel a deep sense of emptiness over the fact.

I grew to adore my creator over time, it always gave me immense satisfaction when I made him laugh, his laugh tinkered in my ears and out of all the laughter I had heard in my human life, his had been the only one to fill me with such pride. My maker admitted he had been lonely, that for centuries he had searched for the perfect companion, someone with spirit and most importantly someone whom he could keep a conversation with. He said that I was all those things and more. I grinned and told him to stop bloating my ego or else I would float away. We stayed like that for a while. He taught me a new thing everyday and in return I gave him the gift of laughter. For centuries we lived such a wonderful, carefree lifestyle, we were friends and lovers, a fact that I never thought would come into existence especially considering the fact I thought that I had no interest in men.

Something happened to me though, something that I thought would be impossible considering the deep bond I held with my maker. Never the less it happened much to my surprise. It was a late, November evening when I saw her, Annabelle. I gawped at her for quite sometime, so frail and dainty, I simply wanted to wrap my arms around her and protect such a sweet little form. Despite my better judgement I went to her like a moth to a flame but really, considering what I am it should be the other way around. Her wide, doe eyes fixed on me and at once I watched as her face enveloped into a look of complete awe as if I were the most beautiful creature on this earth, I ran to her and sated my whim. My strong, pale arms wrapped around her form and I held her so tightly, felt the warmth of her small body pressed against me, it was almost overwhelming.

“What’s a girl like you doing out here, catching snowflakes?” I questioned with a grin, almost breathless from sheer exhilaration.

“My names not girl, its Annabelle. Dark stranger tell me would you laugh if I told you I was waiting for a prince?” she questioned with such innocence it was almost unbearable.

“I would not laugh, I am certain it is one of the only things I find myself not able to laugh at.” I replied as I took in the scent of her hair…her face…her neck…I drew away after that thought, I would not harm this pure child of earth.

“Have I offended you, sir?” she questioned, her face fixed in worry.

“Not at all, dear Annabelle in fact it is the opposite! I fear I will offend you!” I replied with a small laugh only to stop instantly when I felt her warm hand against my cheek. For a few moments I simply glanced at her in surprise before slowly raising my hand and cupping it over hers. I leant in, those beautiful eyes closed and my lips began to hover ever so slightly over hers and then I completed the action. I kissed the human, her mouth was simply a delight and her lips tasted like honeysuckle so much so that I wanted to milk them dry and forever taste that divine flavour.

Our kiss suddenly stopped, I felt something trickle against my lips which I knew was blood. I drew back only to find her face fixed in a look of shock, pain and betrayal, those wonderful eyes wide and loosing colour rapidly. A hand was through her chest and in it was clasped her heart, no longer in its original body. I stuttered and then backed away, almost falling flat onto my face watching as Annabelle’s body crumpled to the floor and in its place stood Edwin. The vampire stared at me vehemently before tossing away the fresh heart in disgust, he came before me with a mad look in his eyes. He slapped me hard across the face, I heard a repetitive clicking noise as his fingers danced in the air, curling into themselves as his nails became longer. I had no time for anything except to shriek when those very nails sunk into my chest and created a ragged love heart upon it, the wound was deep and sent me reeling in pain.

“I CREATED YOU FELIX! I CAN JUST AS EASILY BREAK YOU!” he screamed in a voice that reminded me of a banshee.

As I lay there bleeding and bewildered suddenly a laugh surfaced from my lips, I realized I had become hysterical. “Don’t go breaking my heart” I sang almost bitterly clutching my wound and trying to sit upwards before licking Annabelle’s blood from my lips. Edwin seemed to stare at me for the longest time afterwards until eventually he cringed at what he had done.

“Felix…I-I didn’t mean it…I just saw you together…I don’t know what possessed me…” he almost whispered then outstretched his hand to clasp my face.

“Don’t touch me. Don’t you ever touch me!” I shouted the words at him before managing to stand and hobble away. If I would have looked back, my eyes would have seen something miraculous, a vampire crying crystallite tears, my maker crying tears that had the appearance of diamonds.

I never saw him after that evening, oh I tried don’t get me wrong. When I came back to our usual lair he was no where to be found, it struck me as odd that all of his clothes and other personal possessions still lay there, waiting for me. Their owner however seemed to have vanished. I spent a large portion of my existence looking for Edwin, not wanting to face the fact that my creator was most likely dead. Not wanting to admit that after the dreadful evening when I left him crying in the snow that he had stayed there until morning and let the sun claim him.

I remained alone for so very long, don’t ask me how many years for I cannot tell you. I was simply there, wandering like a lost soul and searching for a purpose. I no longer had anyone to entertain, none would hear my jokes and lunacies, a comedian without an audience is a sad sight indeed my friends. In a way this was something I needed to experience for if I had not then there would be no possibility of me finding the place that I now call home. A place where I am always welcome and a place where my talents are put to good use.

I met Muds, sometimes I call him Muddies just for shits and giggles. I struck up a conversation with him the only way I knew how, with a joke. Thankfully it wasn’t a bad one as I seemed to amuse the man. I told him how grateful I was to have made someone laugh at least once this day, of how I longed to become a Jester once more. He told me of his coven, that he was the leader and instinctively I felt that faint prickle of curiosity arouse once more. It had been so long since I had encountered any of my kind, odd I know considering there are quite a few of us scattered around, the mere thought that a group of them hung about sent me spiralling into elation. I immediately looked at the man with determination before letting my mouth turn into a crooked smile, I left him with that, making a promise that I would be an useful addition to his coven.

I made good on my promise and everything was going swimmingly, I think that I get on well with the others, I am sure I annoy them with my lack of seriousness and the fact that I view life as a running gag. Everyone needs a comic even if I choose to be one at the most inappropriate of times, oh who am I kidding! I’m a comic all the time! Haha! Life’s a funfair kids! You have to try all the rides! Sorry sorry! I know loosing track again, wait didn’t I already explain about that? Haha! Never mind. I settled in well and the pain of my lost creator seemed to lessen as I surrounded myself with company, of course I still miss Edwin but I am sure he would not have wanted me to partake in such a miserable existence. My smile is my best feature so I am told.

The day of Angels now there was a sight for the eyeballs. For a while I itched my noggin had a good laugh and was about to turn around and head back home but as you all probably know I wasn’t going to get away that easily. A soft thud and there in my arms was my very own angel, I could have made a very cheesy pick up line at that point just to be annoying but instead I simply grinned, a movement that had become my signature. “Wow, they’re pretty much giving away food these days!” I commented but was cut off when my neck was bitten rather rudely. “Now that’s hardly fair is it? Its not like I was going to eat you or anything, well not all of you anyway!” I said with a chuckle, instantly dropping the angel in my arms and touching the wound upon my throat. Apparently this was no laughing matter, apparently the little vixen had bound me to him in that nasty little n**. I must say I was not pleased about the matter but hell I just laughed it off, life throws s**t at you and obviously those guys up in heaven were having a riot. Let em’ laugh, let em’ roll in the isles, they wouldn’t be getting their jollies when the time for payback was upon them.




✘ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxEven Those Who Are Cast From Salvation Have Pleasures...

✔ Things I A d o r e The Most... →


⊡ Follies - A guy needs to get his jollies somehow, am I right?

⊡ Comedians - Hell sometimes its nice to sit back and watch other guys try to raise a laugh out of the stiffs!

⊡ Surrealist Art - That s**t is hilarious and intriguing at the same time, Salvador Dali was my hero man.

⊡ Musicals - Life is a cabaret old chum!

⊡ Originality - Its hard to come by these days, sadly.

⊡ Cereal - Any time, Any place. I will eat the stuff to the point of obsession.



✖ I Can Not Help But D e s p i s e This The Most... →


⊠ Boring People - Need I say more?

⊠ Bad Jokes - Is that a tumbleweed I see rolling by?

⊠ Being Outstaged - I’m the centre of the show right now so sod off! D<

⊠ Seriousness - Life is there to be lived! Turn that frown upside down, its so easy to get wrinkles if you don’t!

⊠ Soya Milk - Have you tried the stuff? It tastes like liquefied cow s**t, not that I’d know what that tasted like or anything…

⊠ Kiss ups - I loathe them entirely. I find it pathetic and its simply revolting to watch.



☢ Hidden B e n e a t h The Surface →
I fear not having an audience. The thought of forever wandering the earth with not a single soul to laugh at my antics fills me with a deep sense of despair. I would rather die then spend my eternal life alone and unappreciated. My job is to make people laugh when I hear that beautiful laughter all for me it makes me feel like I am worth something, that all my trials and errors were worth it for that single moment. Take that away and I am nothing but a husk.


↘ Behind Every T r a g e d y There Is A Cause...→

▸ Poison_Grass ◂