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ive lost so much.
i can't even cry anymore, nothing can bring me to that pain.
why did i let someone like you take my life and crumble it into a ball, run me as if i was nothing, to tell me what to do, to force me to do things. why. i do not think you realize what you have truly done to me, youve broken me. ive been broken so many times and smashed back together nothing fits where it should, my heart beats where my shoulder now is. it hurts too much, you being gone is an odd feeling. ive moved on, found someone to truly love but still, knowing you will never speak to me ever again hurts beyond words and i dont know what to do or say. i cant ever tell anyone any of this because it will appear different than i meant it to be. i just want to understand all this pain coursing through me. i want to know and understand why, why? do i still deserve this constant pain? i dont understand.