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The bright glow of the harmonous Moon dances over the enchanted earth which I am priveledged to walk upon with angst. Through my faultering emotions as I stare into the vast darkness around me outside, I feel the sharp painful sadness creep over me from such lonesomeness on the field. I make the money... I always do my job... but for what gain? And for what benefit? I truly cannot elude what I was made for or what I do. 'Tis a past I am more than willing to cast aside, but so difficult to escape. All I do is spill the crimson loss... And yet in the end... I stand alone... grasping in the sky for the one whom I long for, the one person who brings me together... calm, destroying my demons, chasing them away and leaving nothing more but peace in my soul... I feel clean, washed away from the mountain of sin which I bring... Heaven doesn't want me... the gates of hell shan't allow such a wise soul in... I'm left alone... from the time of my creation... and most likely to the end, if that even exists... But when I remember that smile... that tender feeling from just those eyes... something more bellows within... another pain... much more striking and undeniable then what I am dealt with every day... However its something I am happy to have... happy to know that I can fight for someone... Someone who will save me... catch me from falling...
X_Makibi · Mon Oct 23, 2006 @ 05:18am · 1 Comments |
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IndEcenT FaUltS (Introduction) |
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Confused and left without words is an understatement for one who has so much to speak? loss of Reason can cause one to babble? but when you've just been struck with grief, does anything ever make sense? To mark history would be useless, but to make history is worth a thousand ages? But none of that matters if you don't know the names of your tools? what your working with? the beginning is always a nice place to start?
Do you recognize the man in front of you? Do you know who he is? the one speaking his mind before the very souls who dare judge him? Do you know his story? Or why his dark eyes appear to be full of sorrow and anger all while giving comfort? Do you know the difference between him and the rest of the world? It's not obvious? although it screams in ignorance right in front of you? Is he just a man, shadowed by his own honesty? Do you really think that his kindness isn't the blanket of a dark truth? a side not seen by human eyes? He speaks words of wisdom? twisted but deep. He stands and stares before you, silently screaming with envy to have lived a life as horribly wrong as any of you. When in reality, it is what makes you all human that bears into his dark, cold soul and makes him mourn for what has been taken from him years ago?. It is your very likeness as humans that you all do not see? what he does see? Innocent children merely teaching what was once taught or disgraceful shadows only mocking your very existence by taking it for granted? off his stone-misted fist? he stands before you as a man? but speaks as a reaper? taking your very souls beneath your feet? as now, he stands? as now, I stand? I do not want you to notice me or to recognize the ignored and mis-interpreted message in this script? I do not want you all to understand the broken story I carve into this damn forsaken world? a work made uneasily without care or spite? I don?t want those to think that I am the kind and gentle soul that materializes the beautiful but deadly smiles on your faces, nor the outstanding orphan with a blood stained past? Rather see me as the one who stands before you? speaking the truth? and honesty? marking your minds for the rest of the day? only to forget tomorrow? a cliche' spoken before, as many along will be? Ignore these wings and take a closer look at the purest miracle of all? yourselves?.
X_Makibi · Thu Mar 09, 2006 @ 06:02pm · 0 Comments |
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Questioning the Angel's wings |
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The knowledge brought forth from such a new turn of events was enough to continue on, even if his sources were beginning to deplete. The only thing he really needed was the motivation, the will to move on. However it wasnt' courage which brought behind him death, but it was the right of destiny itself.
How far would a being go, knowing that he could not be touched by death, to reach his goal? Bodies lie the path of his allies merely because of thier affiliation. They will not represent his defiance to society nor the collateral for the sorrow thrown into his rejection of life. The lives of those who shall be struck down will not be taken away... but delivered... Is he really an obscure Angel sent down or created to save everyone... only to show his own worth by slaughtering the masses...
Carried by the shadow of darkness and the lust for answers, he will pay no mind to the treacherous corruption which awaits him. And so at first with no hesitation or aid, to protect her from harm is what he shall do. It wasn't a plan for their lives to grow closer, but fate itself had played its cards for own amusement.... it will be their turn to fullfill their roles as Sage and Guardian...
"... I'm not sure why I was chosen to fullfill this destiny... I never wanted to have part in any of this... but all in all, I really must say that I enjoy the results thus far... tell me, Tensai... If I were never ment to be her Guardian... would I have ever met her at all?..." ~X confessing to Tensai (Twenty Fifth ::Chaotic Episode:: )
X_Makibi · Mon Jan 23, 2006 @ 06:05pm · 0 Comments |
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In reply to this in operable substance known as life... my existance has been questioned several times... and I've the same answer every time. But how long can I go with just the same motivation? Will not this desire to disern this responsibility take over and just give no purpose to the struggle?
Millions on this planet whom complain about how bad they've their lives... how different and better it would be to partake another's role... all for the benefit of their own. Greed can take over... and power becomes a neccessary goal to live in this world of beggers and choosers. Treading past the masses of those who do not know what they really are.... not believing the fact that everyone is the same... simply born to die... and for me to save them... seeming like such a very tiresome duty... but a purpose none the less...
Saving the ill minded... the sadistic souls... the corrupted onlookers... the dying angels... the cannon fodder... Is this what I await?! ...to become forgotten like the winds of yesterday.... for the sake of the filth of tomorrow... I just hope... that before I do go... my pain and suffering will be rewarded... with her safety...
"...the dreams I have of me dying are the best dreams I've ever had... this place is full of worn out faces... no where left to go, crowded with sadness and sorrow, lacking a tomorrow full of passion which will never come... countless footsteps made, only to take me nowhere so fast... please kill me now... you're so close, X... finish it for us all... hurry... and bring our tomorrow... to today..." - Dying Ayane to X (Twenty Fifth ::Chaotic Episode:: )
X_Makibi · Wed Dec 07, 2005 @ 02:11pm · 0 Comments |
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A shallow rain is nothing to fear... |
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On a fair yet rainy day a man travels down his near broken path. in his hands he holds an umbrella, however, he does not choose to use it. But despite the down pour of rain, he continues to tread calmly and easily. Is this man a fool?... This man is nothing close to foolish... he continues on his path knowing that the water from the rain can do him no harm. it can not penetrate the body, but can only repel off of its durable form. The use of the umbrella would be useless... and Irrateable action...
...To tread onto the battle field with only deliverance in hand... to continue to reap your strength with no recoil from the sorrow, corruption and death constantly confronting you with every footstep closer to destiny... to know that nothing can harm you unstopable soul... this is the way of the Fallen Minatsu... may nothing stop you....
"Why else should I continue to walk by your side!? Damn it, can't you see at all of what's going on around you!!?? I'm not doing if for the thrill of the kill... I'm not doing it to save lives... I'm doing it... for you..." ~ X to Oni (Twenty Fifth ::Chaotic Episode:: )
X_Makibi · Wed Nov 30, 2005 @ 02:16pm · 0 Comments |
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Who is this character looking back at me? His eyes peircing with loneliness and creed... mending my beliefs with his broken sorrow, he shows me what it truly means to be dark without standing in the shadow of our murderous demons... His stance so defiant... dementing, but calm... does he resemble the guardian taunting my mind? The elements hidden from mans eyes? I step away from this mirror and leave the questioning behind... its nothing more but an image in my mind... a message trying to be told... just leave it be... and think about tomorrow... another image waiting to set in...
X_Makibi · Mon Nov 07, 2005 @ 09:47pm · 1 Comments |
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An opressive happiness... |
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It brung a deep and factual smile to my innerside when she came out of her front door with happiness in her eyes. It also added to the effect when she, my one and only, brought with her some gifts in response to it being my birthday. What better than Cherry Coke and one of the world's most funnest games for the demented (The suffering: Ties that bind).... but an intimate kiss which was worth more than the deepest of words scripted in the card given to me... I then realized that I was truly happy... beneath the hard worked ill-success and neglected intelligence... I am happy to have such an exsplendid creature before me... Happy to know that she is there... for me... Happy to know that she, like no other... loves me....
"Befallen is your inner hatred, for a soul with no rage has no sight of reality... may your inner self destroy the barricade of truth and perge away the illness with bloodshed... unleash your true being, and let all who keep you from her safety feel the wrath of the chaotic guardian of the Fallen Minatsu..." ~Atticus to X (Nightmare: night of 10/31/05)
X_Makibi · Wed Nov 02, 2005 @ 01:59pm · 1 Comments |
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The chaos and insecure divinity which crushes the back of my mind with thought after thought of dire hate and fortitude tends to catch me by surprise. No matter how frequent I get to be with her, see her, feel her, taste her... I still am bewilded by this unsightful pain... and because of my tendency to bury all true feeling inside, this pain is never witnessed by the eyes of many...
The broken smiles and faultered premonitons have told me several times that this isn't going very easy, and that the feelings are just barely there... what can I do to intensify this want, this need to destroy the loneliness? I want her so much... but does she feel the same in reality? or is it all just a send of pity and misguided direction....
The one thing i hate the most is pity... in whatever desireable fasion it may be displayed... I'd rather be forgotten, a fate far worse than any ever imaginable, than pitied by the highest of souls... I shall try to bend the rules... and achieve my proximity... I adore the nobility some times... but the unknown can kill you with suspence...
X_Makibi · Mon Oct 31, 2005 @ 03:46pm · 0 Comments |
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Slowly moving but still well... |
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<img src="http://images.quizilla.com/R/roseblossom/1076343773_teriousboy.jpg" border="0" alt="You're a living riddle..."><br>Mysterious Guy! The living riddle! You are smart, a<br>kind of a mysterious loner and you love to talk<br>in riddles, girls can't resist that. Great for<br>you.
Well... I don't know what to mention about this... but I gave it a try... and i'm satisfied with the results... the quizes available however were a little odd... most of them were for girls... I do enjoy the Gun as my favorite weapon though, that was accurate...
Today will be a long day... since I won't have my love till after the middle of the day has past... I'm not sure what to do til I see her today, but I'll wait patiently for her, today will be a good day for the two of us... I can't wait to see her biggrin ...
I've been hanging with my guild alot, so this whole gaia thing is working out pretty well... i don't believe it, but i think i like it... anyhow, things are going well for me so far... especially since the weekend is open for many things for me, I hope everything turns out well in the end...
X_Makibi · Fri Oct 21, 2005 @ 02:59pm · 0 Comments |
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