I feel so ******** worn. People ******** bitching at me to do what they want me to do for them, all the ******** time... s**t, the amount of work I have to do in such a short space of time is staggering. And with this, my mother shows me something she has failed to over the past seven or so years... Sympathy. Empathy. A little human emotion. Threw me completely.
For those that expect something from me, you'll get jack s**t and like it. For those I want to do something for, be prepared.
What with the amount of work I've been doing I've not seen much else other than the inside of my house... I feel like a ******** nut just working my college day and coming home to a damn near empty house and getting on with more work... It's not fair! It's not right! I shouldn't have to do this much!
It feels like for every piece I do, there's another to complete... An endless stream of s**t I have to wade through... but the worst thing is, this isn't even like me... Most days I'll shrug it off and get on with it, because there are obviously people out there with worse s**t to deal with... but I don't feel like that anymore. I feel helpless and afraid of what might happen if I don't do everything like they tell me to... Everything I do isn't enough! It could be better, there could be that much more effort involved, when I have no motivation to do anything I don't want to.
Recently I've been waking up and wondering why I have, when live feels like an affliction I wanna sleep off. I don't want to have to prove to society that I'm intelligent, I can be that without their permission.
Ah to sleep perchance to dream... I don't dream anymore... I wanna sleep... sleep and dream of a time when I'll be free to enjoy the childhood I failed to appreciate.
But then, wasters don't get a second chance... do they...
Stimm Community Member 
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