http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mv-WkXLcnKI
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This really is an extremely important question for me as I am attending a wedding this weekend. In addition, I agree with some here you need to give a present- enough to cover the expense one year anniversary gifts for him of the meal. In case you cannot manage to do that, that's okay- select not to attend the reception, or give something, at least a card.
In regards to the issue of folks giving gifts- Ya was confused by this at my wedding also. There were a few couples who did not give a gift or a card that Ya never would have anticipated. I'm writing it off as they forgot because they are some of our closest friends nowadays, and neither of us have ever brought it up.
Ew, folks. ARAs like this consistently bring out the remarks from people that are just DYING to brag about understanding, compassionate and non-materialistic they were about their particular first anniversary gifts for him wedding, and in general. Puke. Come onnnn. If your wedding were not at least a little bit about the gifts", you would not have enrolled for any!
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