Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

April 21, 2013
4:00pm PH Time.

First of all, i don't know what to say... I'm so confused.. about what's happening even though i know.. what's the current status of my self... well.. lately.. i usually don't count things.. but only to say.. it's been 1 month and 21 days.. since i become like this... i can't tell by instinct anymore..it's been wild, surprising and all this sh*t..

There was this time when i feel like it's so magical, and suddenly, BANGGGG!!
you lost everything.. well not literally... i save some for the HOBO's LOL!!!!..

i just keep on asking to GOD.. "WHY?,does this happening to me?" LOL ... poor english.. boo..

well this is embarrassing i guess.. but no matter what happens.. ill be like this..
silent, mad, empty, angry, or whatever...maybe worst..?


This doesn't even matter.. i just voice/write it out here..

For you my love..


You've always been there for me..

i feel it.. Here i go again.. with all this dramatic sh*t stuff..

I cried.. a lot.. it never stopped..

strange isn't it?.. when all i ever do is to love you..

when everything's perfect.. and then suddenly i brake down..
it feels like hell.. worst.. like an angel without his wings.. cry

when you said those things.. i can't really take.. it breaks through my heart..
it affects the whole me.. but i never get mad at you.. nor angry..

because you were never wrong.. it's just that it hurts so much for me to take..

YOUR MY WORLD... you're everything to me..

these words can't express how i really feel about you..

the LEAST i can do is to say sorry for my wrong doings.
sorry for HURTING your feelings..

I don't blame you.. because that's how you feel..

it's just so hard to take it back you know..

I DON'T WANT TO LOOSE YOU.. don't let go.. crying

i know you've said those words.. co'z your confused... and you literally say that you don't know the answers to my question, Like, "What do you want?" or "Are you Okay?" you express things.. co'z you can't say it to me in person.. i might be mad or something.. i get you.. :'<

Co'z feelings are hard to express..

Right now.. i don't know.. seems like everything's in mess..
i don't want to be alone again..

i keep on praying.. GOD please..

I know what i did.. and I'm really sorry for it..

and i gave it all.. my love.. i don't want to force everything.. that's why it's really hard for me.. it's always been her all along.. the things i do.. it's for us.. heart

now i don't know if you can read this..

but i can't stop crying.. T__T...

I don't even know what's right and wrong..

I'm so open that everybody can see me through..

THIS LIFE... all i do is to love you..

and it brakes my heart so bad..

I think of you a lot..

I'm always here.. ill be waiting till forever.. :')


I'M SORRY... :'((((((



-Cheru-

[I don't have my wings anymore, so flying with you won't be easy]