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I apologize. Chapter 5 is written out but it's...it's not what I wanted. So I'll be bust rewriting that chapter and the ones that follow. Or rather, should I continue the story off the top of my head? I'll let you all decide. For the time being, I'll shall a short story with you all. A one-shot, if you please. Though, it's a bit long. The title? Why...it's...

Soft Insanity Replaced by That

What you’re about to read is one event, an event that changed my life forever. And in no smalls means whatsoever. Yes, and I should’ve seen it coming. Yet I didn’t.

I was a simple person of simple needs. I had a full family that loved me: an atheist father, a Christian mother, and a Christian big sister. Me? I’m agnostic. But our religious preferences do serve a purpose in being revealed. After all, if I was a complete atheist or devout Christian, none of this mess would have happened.

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I’m your average school-attending teenager. I have an average face and average body. This serves no real purpose. Just imagery.

We don’t live in the city. We don’t live in the country. But there is a mountain, very close to us. Because of it, there is a ‘Bermuda’ affect on the weather. Bad weather is adverted most of the time, but mild weather sticks. That’s important too.

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Ever since that damned storm that had swept across the world, and impenetrable fog settled over the valley (in a sense) in which I lived. It was ironic, since I was moping. I had just lost my best friends. I used to live in a much different environment. A city that was in a mountain. I had many friends. But then we moved out here. Away from the mountain. My friends and I, we drifted apart. Soon, they stopped picking up my calls. And even if they did, nothing they said made sense.

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The kids here are strange. Normally, smoking and rugs and pregnant girls would be a normal thing to see. There was none of that here. Rather, either you were religiously devout, or you weren’t. I was neither of those. That’s probably why I haven’t befriended not one person here in the first place.

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For a while, I’ve felt that there were eyes on me. I never knew why, until I actually saw it. By then, it was too late. It was a Saturday. I was dreading the quiet walk. Y’see, with the lack of friends, and the lack of skills to adapt with either not believing or believing strongly, I was left alone. With no one to talk to, my mind quickly became filled with…the only word I could think of, was darkness. Darkness, so vast and cold, that I became terrified of it.

The cold, by now, had me in a tight embrace. I felt my self drifting a little bit away from reality each day. But then he showed up. The guy who got me where I am.

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Back to that Saturday, he walked up next to me.

“Your mind is filled with delicious insanity.” He said, softly, as if not to startle the darkness. I stopped and looked at him. He looked back at me. His hair was a deep maroon, like blood. His skin, was as tan as bronze. And his eyes, those eyes, were black. But near the iris, a hint of violet?

“I’ve become insane, then?” I asked, desperate for converse.
“Not yet. But you’re really close.” He said with a smile. “It reminds me of Hell.”

That was hint. An obvious one I missed due to insanity.

“…You’re a devout?”
“Hehhehheh… What the hell for? It’s stupid.”
“Then…an atheist?”
“******** no. The gods definitely exist.”
“Agnostic, then?”
“Hm, I wonder.”

I walked away then. Some, small shred of humanity in me remained. I later recognized it as my gut. I went home, no, not home, to the house the gave birth to the darkness in me. Yes. That’s what it was.

Inside that place so dark, my mind expanded, to encompass all the darkness there. As usual, my folks weren’t home. Always working. My sis was over a friend’s house. They were lucky. They could escape the darkness, and avoid it for long hours. Me? I had to stew in it. No friends to spend time with. No family to bother. Just darkness.

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The shadows have lengthened again. Soon, their ‘arms’ will be touching me once more. Scratching me, gagging me, and dragging me down into…that.

What is soft insanity? It’s the kind where the subject realizes it, and can do nothing about it. Hard insanity grabs the victim so hurriedly, they have no time to be aware.

I would have preferred the hard insanity. The softness is killing me.

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It’s night-time now. The light can’t reach me now. The darkness embraces me as I try to sleep. But I know I won’t be able to. Rather, I stare at the walls and watch the shifting shadows. That is, until they choke me and I fall once again.

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Someone is standing over me. I know it. I want to open my eyes, but I don’t want to see. I can feel their breath on my cheek. The hint of cinnamon on their breath. How do I know all this? Aren’t I not unconscious?

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School is cancelled due to the fact it’s All Hallow’s Eve week. The atheists have dressed up to scare the devout. The devout have locked their selves in their homes. My dad plans to go out and scare as well. My mother is calmly having bible study with sis.

Why, or rather, how the hell are they together!?

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At some point, I feel the pressure of the softness again. I need to leave. And I do. I take my bicycle and bike out into the woods. The darkness can’t reach me here. Because of the tree. The tree blossoms all year round. It has never wilted. The townsfolk stay away from it. They don’t ever say why.

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I can hear the quiet in my mind. It’s almost…disturbing. The tree feels warm. The bark seems to radiant its own light. A perfect refuge.

I didn’t know. That tree didn’t exist. All I know, is that when I awoke, nothing was there. And yet, I was quite sure the faint warmth on my back was that of the tree. No, wait, the warmth was still there. It…it’s alive. Something I was leaning against was alive. I wanted to look, but I didn’t.

Whatever it was was facing me. I could feel its breath ghosting over my ear with a hint of…cinnamon!? Slowly, I turn to look. I must’ve been a cat in my last life. I was staring at a very, very, big dog. No, dog seemed wrong due to its size. Wolf was better and… There were stripes. A cat? This was a pretty big cat.

I slowly got up and stepped away. But, seeing as I didn’t want to take my eyes off of what was in front of me, I didn’t see behind me. A hole.

With crash and breaking of sorts, I fell right on my… Ah…oww! That really hurt. Then I heard a snort. It definitely heard me. I carefully stand back up and look over. Ah, it was still asleep? Lucky me. I took no time fleeing.

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The huge cat came back. Or rather, it found me again. It happened at school. The atheists were laughing about some ‘tiger’. The devout were afraid to leave the school because of some demon. I, not caring one bit, headed for my bus.

Said cat was sitting next to it. When it saw me, it ran towards me in great bounds. I would have run. I really would have. But that cursed softness had slowed my reflexes. Down it came. And me with it. Thankfully, I wasn’t in too much pain.

It licked my face in a way that said it missed me. Had I been all there, I would have been confused. Rather, I stared up into the huge dark eyes, with a tinge of violet, staring down at me. Wait…those eyes…

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It followed me home. Riding atop the bus. The devout with praying for safety. The rest were jeering at me. I didn’t have enough ‘self’ to care.

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No one was home. I tried to shut the door, but the creature forced its way it. Sighing, I shut the door after it. I left my bag at the door and went into the kitchen. The creature followed me. I made a simple meal of salami. The creature seemed interested, so I gave it about whimsically.

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Whilst in my room, everyone came back for the night. I had been busy ‘suffocating’. So mother’s scream was a wake-up. I casually walked out my room, only to bump into something. Or rather, someone.

It was the boy, kinda. He was taller, slightly muscular, and wearing only a waist-towel. What the…? When did he come into my house? And was it just to take a shower? Weirdo.

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Sis was fanning mother’s fan, trying to revive her. Dad stood there, looking like an idiot. So the task fell to me.

“Who are you and what are you doing here?”

The boy/man smiled at me.

“I am who ever you want me to be, Master. And I am here to serve you.”

What…the…

“That doesn’t quite answer my question.”
“For many years, I’ve been stuck in the spot for nearly all of eternity. Until you came along and slept beneath my withered form.”

This description…

“You’re…the tree?”
“That is but one of my many forms. Do you prefer me that way?”
“…That still doesn’t answer my question.”
“In exchange for freeing me from my curse, I’ve decided to sell my powers to you and only you.”

I looked at my dad. Still shell-shocked. Well, that’s how he looked.

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Later that same night, I was kicked out and ended up moving in with my illegitimate brother. On my dad’s side of course. The boy/man/creature followed me there too. My brother was mostly out. As long as I kept the place clean, he didn’t care what I did.

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Funny, though, upon arriving in the town where my brother lived, I was nearly mugged. But then that guy showed up and chased them off. Soft insanity tends to leave you unconcerned with fearing for your life, and thus, I was a little slow. Still, I was lucid enough to know when a good thing was done.

“Fine. Do as you please. Just don’t cause trouble.”

He was overjoyed. Had I been sane, I’d have been worried. But seeing as I am not, I wasn’t.

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I later discovered that he got his power from the constellations, and that…depending on which ones were visible, his nature changed. All of them brought about the same problem, though. They were all obsessed with serving me. Each one in its own corresponding way. For instance, if he was in Leo mode, it was making me proud to having him serve me. Scorpio mode, making me…emotional towards his actions. (Never quite worked out the way he wanted.) And don’t bother asking me about Virgo mode. That one is…tiring in it self. (There were some times I did NOT want to have knowledge of.)

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One day, my brother caught the guy in human form trying to ‘educate’ me on how much the way you look at a person changes your appearance. (The Virgo mode I was talking about.) Something I absolutely didn’t care for nor responded to in any way. Brother found it funny. He didn’t ask where he came from either. Just let it be. He’s too accepting.

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Years later, the soft insanity nearly pushed me to the edge before disappearing all together. I should have been glad, but too much of my life passed me by already. Yes, I graduated high school. Hell, I finished college with a PhD in Psychology. How twisted is that?

That guy? Yeah, he’s still here. Even after I moved around the world, numerous times because of my work. He always found me. He’s grown on me. He still tries to advance on me. I always refuse him. He finds it hilarious. I found it annoying. But I don’t tell him to leave. Like I said, he’s grown on me to the point where I don’t care.

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So now that I’ve finished typing my story, I take a stick of cinnamon and hold it in my mouth. Now here comes he to eat it and thus spur me on once again.

Huh? What is my name? Heh. That’s the point.