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I go back and read all this s**t that went on a year ago and I want to smack myself. Even the s**t that went on not that long ago is ******** retarded. ********. I don't know.
I'm in the weirdest ******** mood today. I woke up and wwas angry at the washer and dryer (becuase my dad hasn't done laundry and I don't have any) since they wouldn't work. I havn't had clean clothes for a weak, I tell my dad three days in a row and he still dosen't do it. Now he brings on this whole thing about no one helping him with housework. ******** that s**t. I have a necklace and a small jewlry box upstairs, everything else is his, Fluff's or Justin's. Where's my stuff? I picked it up! Well on with my story. So the dryer wouldn't work and I got really pissed off. Then I remember why I don't do laundry anymore.
DAna always tells me this is wrong and this is wrong. What the ********, I'm not complaining to you so be ******** happy! But I guess I'm not good enough am I? He says my mum always did that to him, well he must have learned from her. But then the washer or dryer never work when I use them. I wish I knew why. I guess he's the only one who can get them to accually work. You know, they both keep me up until 3 in the morning becuase I sleep three feet away, but no he's always the one who has the problem with it, and is the on always bothered by them. I stress oiyt over this, he wants me to have good grades but I'm worried about what I will do for the next week. AHHHHH
Aright, well I am in three bands now.
Funeral Eucharist, One eyed Willy, and one that hasn'y been named yet. In FE I play bass the others I play guitar and in Willy I sing too. I went through voice lessons for a while and I am finally comforatable with my voice. I may be starting something with Alex, possibly singing. Kikass. Oh god, I wrote about him.
Yes, Alex. Alex is this kid that I knew from St.Bens last year. He's at memorial now and now he lives acrossed the streat instead of in Boonville. This last week we have been hanging out EVERY day. I rea;;y want to take a shower and get dressed so I can go over there, but no, nothing is clean. AHHH. My brain hurts so much. I need to talk to him.
Right now, he's probably my best friend. But then I have been ignoring everyone else, or they have just been ignoring me. Steph is with John, Sarah can't make a move without everyone consulting on it, and everyone else I just hamng otu with at school. I pissed of Sarah becuase I didn't want to talk cause I had three people over at my house and I didn't want to be rude, but she wanted me to stay on the ohone, and she hasn't called back in almost three days. I'm ******** amased. Must be everyone's but my time of the month. I'm just happy to be with Alex and away from all the estrogen. Chase is cool too, and Jared. Girls are just ******** annoying.
Well, my Jack is having some problems now too. It's going into springa nd all the drama pops up. WHAT THE ********? Ah. I'm so lost. I feel bad for him, for Alex and his parents, for Chase, for Sarah, for Steph and her boy. As usual I am waisting my life on others. I'm sick of it. Will someone ever waiste their life on me?
But then I would never wish that on anyone. I know how it ******** feels, and I'm sick of it, why should I put someone else through the same hell?
Well, I am doing better in school now that I don't give a ******** about it. I may have bombed the bio test,a nd I think I did, but still in geometry I got a 91 on the last test. This is the class I failed last semester. In history I got a 82, missing on 18, And of course everyone else missed like 30 or so. I'm relaly confused. I'm doing decently in gym because there is nothing to do. My lungs are worse then usual. I guess I shoudl be used to that. I'm so pissed off about it though. I'm on a dose pack as usual and I hate it. It kills my back and I jsuthate it. But at least I' not shaking. I'm so sick of feeling week. I guess I's giving myself up for everyone. They shoudl be happy, but no they don't care. Oh well, no one but me can add up the given numbers, and I'm the one failing my math classs. The world is doomed.