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Well, I'm doing better. Its just, now that I talk to either of my friends I tend to remember the journal two posts before this one and I feel funny. or my chest does. Then I rememebered these two dreams I had. One about each of them. In one of them, for no reason that I know of, my friend had no shirt on. (and nothing under neath.) I saw nothing anyways. In the other one, I was at my old high school, walking around and going to class (i only remember a small part of one class) like i normally would. (the odd part was that it was kinda different then how my school actually looked.) Then I went to this assembly thing, where I met up with my friends and we sat down in the back two rows of seats. I was sitting sideways, so my back was to open space, when someone hugged me from behind. (note, while talking to my friends I had my hands in my lap.) The hug was warm but I didnt know who it was. or my dream subconcious did, but it wasnt telling. Anyway, the person, male i assume, hugged me and started playing with my hands. I woke up before I could question who it was. annoyed the crap outta me. I still dont know who it was. I just assume who it was.

PS Well, drama sucks. I hate complaining but, Its what i do best. I just fear that Im dragging my friends down. I wonder whats wrong with me too. Im having mood swings, of a sort. On minute I can be happy and carefree, then the next I can be so depressed, I want to cut myself. (i never do though. Im too much of a coward.) That's another reason i have mood swings, I think. Im such a coward. Too afraid to cut myself, too afraid to tell my grandmother to leave me the hell alone, too afraid to tell the ones I love that I love them. It hurts. And all I can do is put on my Mask and go to school and pretend that everything is alright or not so good. And the sad thing is, I isolate myself and end up hurting myself with how lonely I become because of it.