Ok so here is the deal. I was indeed pregnant...and lost the baby due to my body rejecting it which killed me. My ex told me he didn't want anything to do with the baby that is HIS child too. I hadn't talked to him since he told me that and i saw him the other day. My whole body shook and i hated that. I wanted to touch him to be in his arms and get that safe feeling i use to get but no i didn't tell him that i didn't let him know i still had feelings for him. It's killing me though cause i have to tell my family one thing and feel a totaly diffrent thing. I HATE IT! i want to be with him so bad and i love him so much but i'm not what he wants anymore.

My friend told me that he still loves me because he waited a year before we had sex. The new girl he waited a week. His bestfriend told me he was sorry for trying to get my ex to leave me because the new girl is worse than i was. I told him i didn't want his apologie and that it didnt' matter what he told me nothing was going to change. I miss my ex so much though and the other day i woke up in tears because i had a stupid dream about him and i hate that i still can't stop thinking about him. It's been a month! you would think i would be over the stupid boy by now considering how he treated me and all that junk but my heart still hurts when i see his face and i cry so much when some one says his name. what am i going to do?