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okay.

SO. I haven't been on in god knows how long so....if you wanna know the general of what all has happened to me recently...here ya go. For those of you who don't give a s**t, our problem. (i'm assuming no one is going to read this anyways so whatever...)

The biggest thing that happened to me was i went to the hospital for a suicide attempt. I called the Suicide Prevention Line and they sent the police because of the statements i made. After getting to the hospital and talking to doctors....i lied to get out of there...

In all seriousness....i still want to die...

I can't help it. I can't take living. The things that get me by are my friends...and if it wasn't for them....i honest to god don't think i'd be here right now. Yes, i will say some have helped me more than others, but that doesn' mean i don't appreciate their help. I appreciate everyone's help.

But...i'm not happy with myself. I hate mirrors, i hate my body. Yeah, i know what you're thinking. "Everyone hates their bodies." I don't ust "not like" my body, i inflict pain upon myself in the form of cutting partly becasue of the extreme hatred toward myself.

For those of you who didn't know i cut, you do now.

The other reason in cut is because of all the pressure and stress being put on me by myself and my parents. I guess it's just because of all the internal anguish and pain.

And don't think i haven't tried to stop, because i have. I have failed every time. And i hate that feeling that i'm making somebody disappointed or that i'm worrying somebody...the feeling that i screwed up....again.

And i now have to go. Any questions, go ahead and mnessage me.

Good night.