MATURE CONTENT: I really need some help...

[burningfur]

Angel_Nyx

I feel like the dirtiest slut right now. I may have just had sex with my ex-boyfriend. And I've sworn to be a virgin until I get married.

My boyfriend of two years and I broke up a few weeks ago, agreeing to just be friends. But everytime I'm with him alone he starts getting, well, seductive. Far more so than when we were dating. In fact we've gone much farther physically since we broke up than we ever had before when we were dating. I guess I'm just easy, or maybe incredibly lusty, I don't know.

But regardless, the bottom line is that I was on top of him, we were naked, and he claims he got inside me by an inch before he realized he was about to ejaculate and he pulled out. We both feel like trash, me beacause I even let this happen, him because he still wanted to go further and he hates himself for it. Thankfully, he's leaving for army boot camp in a few weeks, and I hopefully won't have to worry about this ever again.

Can this truly be considered sex? Am I still anywhere near being a virgin?How did I go from a perfect little on-fire Christian girl to a slut like this? What good Christian guy is ever going to want to marry me after I tell them this? Will God really forgive me for this?

Please you guys, give me your honest oppinions about everything I've just said, not what I want to hear. Any advice and prayers are welcome.

I've seen a lot of posts saying that God will forgive you. I'm surprised that nobody has called the verse, "examine yourself to see if you're in the faith."

Dear friend, who I don't know very well, it would be terribly foolish of me to say that you're saved when you very possibly might not be. I would encourage you to listen to True and False Conversion to find out what a true convert is and what a false convert and which category you fall into.

Remember, a Christian falls into sin, a non-Christian dives into sin and loves it. The question is simple. Do you love what God loves? Do you hate what God hates? Is your life following the world or is it following God?

A.W. Pink, a famous thelogian in the 60's, wondered if two percent of American Christians were saved. I was too once a false convert, it's a very, very dangerous and deadly path.

I mean this in all love and sincerity. Those who love you the most will tell you the most truth. May God use you in a mighty way to glorify Him.  

[Mountain Rose]

Ya, I don't think you're a virgin anymore, hon. However, if you're really sorry about what you did, and you promise God and yourself not to do it again (ugh, I sound like a mother), you're already forgiven.

As for a good Christian guy ... If he really loves you, he'll forgive you, and he must forgive you in order for your relationship to work. If he just says, "Oh; that's interesting," but there's nothing to show that he's actually forgiven you ("That's all right" doesn't count; he needs to say the words, "I forgive you"), he'll probably hold some sort of grudge and the next time you guys get in an arguement, it'll be, "You slut!"

Anyway, I don't pretend to know everything about relationships, but I think the best thing would be to cut off all contact with your ex ... although you may want to talk to him about it (in an open place or over the phone).  

[Mountain Rose]

burningfur

I've seen a lot of posts saying that God will forgive you. I'm surprised that nobody has called the verse, "examine yourself to see if you're in the faith."

Dear friend, who I don't know very well, it would be terribly foolish of me to say that you're saved when you very possibly might not be. I would encourage you to listen to True and False Conversion to find out what a true convert is and what a false convert and which category you fall into.

Remember, a Christian falls into sin, a non-Christian dives into sin and loves it. The question is simple. Do you love what God loves? Do you hate what God hates? Is your life following the world or is it following God?

A.W. Pink, a famous thelogian in the 60's, wondered if two percent of American Christians were saved. I was too once a false convert, it's a very, very dangerous and deadly path.

I mean this in all love and sincerity. Those who love you the most will tell you the most truth. May God use you in a mighty way to glorify Him.

Though my previous post may suggest otherwise, I agree with burningfur.  

[MONkie-Magik]

I recently struggled with the same problems that are stated in this topic. I just read this topic about a week ago. and it really changed me. I have gone a week without sexual actions. and when i do think about the desires. i prayed for the lords guidance. This was a tough week. I still hope you guys can pray for me!
I know some people might not think of this as a big issue, but I'm glad i got over these temptations because it really made a big gap between my relationship with the Lord. Once again i would like to thank you guys for sharing your words. May God Bless you guys!!!

 

[iremembertherain]

Angel_Nyx

I feel like the dirtiest slut right now. I may have just had sex with my ex-boyfriend. And I've sworn to be a virgin until I get married.

My boyfriend of two years and I broke up a few weeks ago, agreeing to just be friends. But everytime I'm with him alone he starts getting, well, seductive. Far more so than when we were dating. In fact we've gone much farther physically since we broke up than we ever had before when we were dating. I guess I'm just easy, or maybe incredibly lusty, I don't know.

But regardless, the bottom line is that I was on top of him, we were naked, and he claims he got inside me by an inch before he realized he was about to ejaculate and he pulled out. We both feel like trash, me beacause I even let this happen, him because he still wanted to go further and he hates himself for it. Thankfully, he's leaving for army boot camp in a few weeks, and I hopefully won't have to worry about this ever again.

Can this truly be considered sex? Am I still anywhere near being a virgin?How did I go from a perfect little on-fire Christian girl to a slut like this? What good Christian guy is ever going to want to marry me after I tell them this? Will God really forgive me for this?

Please you guys, give me your honest oppinions about everything I've just said, not what I want to hear. Any advice and prayers are welcome.

I don't think your a slut. At all. Don't call yourself that. And I think ANY good Christian guy would want to marry you, because you KNOW it was a mistake. You are a genuinely good Christian who feels sorry about what happened. No true Christian is going to hold that over you and say that it makes you terrible and slutty. We ALL make mistakes. I've made a couple pretty much like this...probaly worse. (*groan* man, I feel stupid sometimes) You just get swept away by guys sometimes. You think that they're more than they are. You never expect bad things to happen.
Since you've asked for forgiveness, it's as though it never happened. That's the power of Christ. Complete and total forgiveness! That's really amazing.
You'll be okay. Be very very careful around this boy though...probably even all guys from now on. I wouldn't suggest being alone with him.  

[squishtastic psycho pop]

All I can add is that whether or not you decide to define it as "real sex" there was something done that shouldn't have been. All you can do is humble yourself before God and ask forgiveness and don't get tied up in a sin because it will most likely bring you down and then you'll commit more that could have been avoided.

Love (in that Jesus kind of way)

The Psycho Pop  

[Angel_Nyx]

Thank you guys for all of your coments, they've all really helped me to realize in how bad a shape my walk with Christ has been in and what I needed to do to fix it. You have all been so kind to me and helped me through this and move past it to more important things. Thank you.  

[Mjolnir The Hammer]

I'm very glad for you. God bless you in your continuing walk with Christ. mrgreen